Console RPG Cliches 1 to 24: Difference between revisions
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our trope 'castle in the sky' fits 'a magic floating castle' better than 'floating continent'
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m (our trope 'castle in the sky' fits 'a magic floating castle' better than 'floating continent') |
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#'''[[Good Morning, Crono|Sleepyhead Rule]]:''' ''The teenaged male lead will begin the first day of the game by oversleeping, being woken up by his mother, and being reminded that he's slept in so late he missed meeting his girlfriend.''
#'''[[Doomed Hometown|"No! My beloved peasant village!"]]:''' ''The hero's home town, city, slum, or planet will usually be annihilated in a spectacular fashion before the end of the game, and often before the end of the opening scene.''
#'''[[The Dulcinea Effect|Thinking With The Wrong Head]] ([[Lunar|Hiro]] Rule):''' ''No matter what they are accused of or [[Mysterious Waif|how mysterious their origins]], the hero will always be ready to fight to the death for any girl they met three seconds ago.''
#'''[[Orphan's Plot Trinket|Cubic Zirconium Corollary]]:''' ''The aforementioned mysterious girl will be wearing a [[MacGuffin|pendant]] that will ultimately prove to be the key to either [[Saving the World]] or [[The End of the World
#'''[[Logan's Run]] [[Competence Zone|Rule]]:''' ''RPG characters are young. [[Kid Hero|Very young]]. The average age seems to be 15, unless the character is a decorated and battle-hardened soldier, in which case he might even be as old as 18. Such teenagers often have [[Instant Expert|skills with multiple weapons and magic, years of experience]], and never ever worry about their parents telling them to come home from adventuring before bedtime. By contrast, characters more than twenty-two years old will cheerfully refer to themselves as washed-up old fogies and be eager to make room for the younger generation.'' (See also [[Most Writers Are Adults]])
#'''[[Parental Abandonment|Single Parent Rule]]:''' ''RPG characters with two living parents are almost unheard of. As a general rule, male characters will only have a mother, and female characters will only have a father. The [[Missing Mom|missing]] [[Disappeared Dad|parent]] either vanished mysteriously and traumatically several years ago or is never referred to at all. Frequently the main character's surviving parent will also [[The Plot Reaper|meet an awkward end just after the story begins]], thus [[Conveniently an Orphan|freeing him of inconvenient filial obligations]].''
#'''[[Only One Name|Some Call Me...]] [[Some Call Me... Tim|Tim?]]''' ''Good guys will only have [[First
#'''[[Nominal Importance|Nominal Rule]]:''' ''Any character who actually has a name is important in some way and must be sought out. However, if you are [[Everyone Calls Him "Barkeep"|referred to as a part of a possessive noun]] ("[[Chrono Trigger
#'''[[Video Game Settings|The Compulsories:]]''' ''[[Seen It a Million Times|There's always]] [[Lethal Lava Land|a fire dungeon]], [[Slippy
#'''[[Science Is Bad|Luddite Rule]] (or, [[George Lucas]] Rule):''' ''Speaking of which, technology is inherently evil and is the exclusive province of the Bad Guys. They're the ones with the [[Schizo
#'''[[Bag of Spilling|Let's Start From The Very Beginning]] ([[Final Fantasy X
#'''[[Impoverished Patrician|Poor Little Rich Hero]] ([[Thousand Arms|Meis]] Rule):''' ''If the hero comes from a rich and powerful family, it will have fallen on hard times and be broke and destitute by the time the game actually starts.''
#'''[[Anime Hair|The Higher The Hair, The Closer To God]] ([[Final Fantasy VII|Cloud]] Rule):''' ''The more [[Improbable Hairstyle|outrageous his hairstyle]], the more important a male character is to the story.''
#'''[[Thief|Garrett's]] [[Kleptomaniac Hero|Principle]]:''' ''Let's not mince words: you're a thief. [[Swiss Cheese Security|You can walk into just about anybody's house]] [[Your Door Was Open|like the door wasn't even locked.]] You just barge right in and start looking for stuff. Anything you can find that's not nailed down ([[
#'''Hey, I Know You!''' You will accumulate at least three of these obligatory party members:
#'''Hey, I Know You, Too!''' You will also confront/be confronted by at least three of these obligatory antagonists:
#'''Hey, I Know You, Three!''' Furthermore, expect to encounter most of the following obligatory non-player characters (NPCs):
#'''[[Chrono Trigger
#'''[[Heroes Prefer Swords|"Silly]] [[Final Fantasy VIII|Squall]][[Heroes Prefer Swords|, bringing a sword to a gunfight..."]]''' ''No matter what timeframe the game is set in -- past, present, or future -- the main hero and his antagonist will both use a [[Cool Sword|sword]] for a weapon. (Therefore, you can identify your antagonist pretty easily right from the start of the game just by looking for the other guy who uses a sword.) These swords will be [[Guns Are Worthless|far more powerful than any gun]] and often capable of [[Sword Beam|distance attacks]].'' (See also [[Katanas Are Just Better]])
#'''[[Unusually Uninteresting Sight|Just Nod Your Head And Smile]]:''' ''And no matter how big that [[BFS|big-ass sword]] is, you won't stand out in a crowd. Nobody ever crosses the street to avoid you or seems to be especially shocked or alarmed when a heavily armed gang bursts into their house during dinner, rummages through their possessions, and demands to know if they've seen a [[Black Cloak|black-caped man]]. [[Seen It All|People can get used to anything, apparently]].''
#'''[[Final Fantasy VII|Aeris's]] Corollary:''' ''Just as the main male character will always use a sword or a variant of a sword, the main female character will always use a [[Simple Staff|rod or a staff of some sort]].''
#'''[[MacGyver]] [[Improbable Weapon User|Rule]]:''' ''Other than for the protagonists, your choice of weapons is not limited to the prosaic guns, clubs, or swords. Given appropriate skills, you can cut a bloody swath across the continent using [[Weapons Kitchen Sink|gloves, combs, umbrellas, megaphones, dictionaries, sketching tablets]]
#'''O Brother, Where Art Thou? ([[Grandia II|Melfice]] Rule):''' ''If the male hero has an older sibling, the sibling will [[Aloof Big Brother|also be male]] and will [[Cain and Abel|turn out to be one of the major villains]]. If the hero has a younger sibling, the sibling will be female and will be [[
#'''[[We Buy Anything|Capitalism Is A Harsh Mistress]]:''' ''Once you sell something to a shopkeeper, he instantly sells it to somebody else and you will [[Lost Forever|never see the item again]] no matter what.'' (Related to [[We Buy Anything]]. Not related to [[Adam Smith Hates Your Guts]]... but he does, and would like you to know that.)
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[[Category:Console RPG Cliches 1
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