Future War: Difference between revisions

{{quote|''"From the future traveled a master race of cyborgs. They made abductions from Earth's past. The dinosaurs were trained as trackers. The humans were bred as slaves. Now a runaway slave escapes to a place his people call [[Heaven]]... we know it as Earth."''|''The [[Opening Narration]]''}}

 

 

The story concerns "[[Everyone Calls Him "Barkeep"|the Runaway]]," a slave who escapes his cyborg masters' spaceship and crash-lands just off the coast of California. Two cyborgs and a pack of dinosaur puppets are dispatched to recapture him. The Runaway kickboxes one of the cyborgs to death and takes down a dinosaur puppet, but is then unceremoniously [[Crash Into Hello|hit by a car]] driven by Sister Anne, a hooker/ganger/druggie-turned novitiate nun. Anne takes him back to her home, a half-way house inhabited by overweight men, and nurses the Runaway back to health. With him choking her and all, they seem to be hitting it off, but their growing bond is interrupted by a dinosaur puppet attack that claims one of Anne's friends.

 

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* [[Air Vent Passageway]]: Subverted. A character tries to crawl in one to hide from the cyborg, but it collapses and dumps her out to be killed.

* [[Battle Strip]]: Done in the most absurd way possible.

* [[Crash Into Hello]]: A rare example involving a vehicle and a pedestrian. And a nun. Sister Vehicular Homicide to the rescue, I guess.

* [[Cruel and Unusual Death]]: Ignoring the lousy effects, let's face it, getting eaten by a dinosaur is not a pleasant way to go.

** Especially since we do get to see the rather gory aftereffects of one such dino-puppet attack about midway through.

* [[Estrogen Brigade Bait]]: Daniel Bernhardt has a ''lot'' of shirtless scenes. The workout scene in the jail cell is particularly blatant.

** An arguably less justified (or at least more conventional) occurrence; the film's original ending involved Sister Anne leaving the convent to team up with the Runaway and help deal with any more Cyborgs that might come back from the future. As it turned out however, one of the film's main backers was a devout Catholic, and he demanded that the ending be changed so that Anne did join the convent after all. This also resulting in the ending which shows the Runaway becoming a counsellor.

* [[Explosive Leash]]: On the dinosaur puppets. "No wonder fossils are so rare."

* [[Flash Back]]: Abused. While meditating/working out in his prison cell, the Runaway flashes back through his earlier fights, including the one that [[Viewers Are Goldfish|ended mere minutes ago]]. All while shouting "Cha" repeatedly.

* [[Forced Perspective]]: Used to cunningly create the illusion that the dinosaur puppets are quite large dinosaur puppets. This makes the fight scenes a little difficult.

* [[Hey, It's That Guy!]]: The film's star Daniel Bernhardt plays one of the upgraded agents in ''[[The Matrix]] Reloaded'' (the one who fights Morpheus on the truck). It's both frightening and uplifting to know that this movie didn't kill his career.

** Robert ''Kabuki Cop'' Z'Dar, who is an MST3K [[Soultaker|repeat offender]].

* [[Lantern Jaw of Justice]]: A villainous example, thanks to Robert Z'Dar of ''[[Soultaker]]'' fame.

* [[Magic Countdown]]: Even on screen, it goes faster than it should!

** Yet, oddly, offscreen it goes ''slower'' than it should.

** To be fair, plaid is stereotypically associated with gangbangers. Of course, that doesn't explain why everyone else is wearing it, too. The Film was actually filmed in 1994. It wasn't relased until 1997. So it make sense since '94 was the hay day of the Grunge era.

* [[Neighbourhood Friendly Gangsters]]: Always ready to help.

[[Category:Mystery Science Index 3000]]

[[Category:Films of the 1990s]]

[[Category:Film]]