Groin Attack/Real Life: Difference between revisions
Rescuing 3 sources and tagging 0 as dead.) #IABot (v2.0.8.6
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** Such incidents seem to be commonplace in Seattle Mariners history. In 1980, pitcher Mike Parrott took a liner to the man area early in the season. Parrott went from 14-12 in 1979 (the team went 67-95) to 1-16 in 1980.
* This seemed to be missed by most people, but in 2006 when the Dallas Mavericks were playing the San Antonio Spurs for the NBA Western Conference championship, coach Avery Johnson made a last second player change, and [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gLV3a4CgYLE Josh Howard received some collateral damage].
* After a bungled plot to blow up Glasgow International Airport: [https://web.archive.org/web/20090825002459/http://current.com/items/88862229_i-kicked-burning-terrorist-so-hard-in-the-balls-that-i-tore-a-tendon-in-my-foot.htm I Kicked Burning Terrorist So Hard in Balls That I Tore a Tendon in My Foot]: [[Crowning Moment of Awesome|Best. Headline. Ever.]] Because as ''[[Cracked.com]]'' [https://web.archive.org/web/20140721012451/http://www.cracked.com/article/79_the-5-most-embarrassing-failures-in-history-terrorism_p2/ points out], they still make MEN up in Scotland.
** Indeed, he did deal a kick to a burning man whose cohort was fighting with police, as the two men had [[Moral Event Horizon|just attempted to attack a civilian transportation center]] with a vehicle bomb and failed, putting the recipient of said kick somewhere in the middle of a Venn diagram of [[Asshole Victim]], [[Acceptable Target]], and [[Kick the Son of a Bitch]] categories for most Western audiences.
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hc5p3TmQx34 This slalom skiier] had an unfortunate encounter with a flag.
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* The "Scrotal Self Repair" [[Darwin Award]] / urban legend. Guy was using the belt of a machine to jerk off and got his nuts caught in it.
* Another [[Darwin Award]] winner injected cocaine into his urinary tract, resulting in severe priapism that led to gangrene that cost him his penis, his legs, and nine of his fingers.
* [https://web.archive.org/web/20110910134943/http://pajamasmedia.com/blog/ask-dr-helen-does-society-encourage-genital-assault-against-men/?singlepage=true At least one (female) psychologist] finds the idea of attacking the testes to be absolutely disgusting, and, among other things, suggests calling Groin Attacks "non-sexual genital assaults" to make them seem less funny.
** Hmm... It's not doing the trick. In fact, the lack of any sexual element is what normally makes them so funny.
* Adam Lambert took one of these at the [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bx_WmUlNil8 Manila performance] of his GlamNation tour. During the dancers' intros he dirty-dances with his choreographer, who at this particular show tried to counter a hip-thrust with a butt-bump at exactly the wrong time and got The Glam One right where it hurts. Check it out at 8:23 and onward. (This Glambert can't help laughing at his reaction every single time . . . even though it really shouldn't be funny.)
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* [https://web.archive.org/web/20111103075048/http://www.ktla.com/news/landing/ktla-crotch-burning,0,2235307.story This woman] set her boyfriend's crotch on fire.
* Leave it to [[The Other Wiki]] to maintain an exhaustive list of [[wikipedia:List of cases of penis removal|recorded penis-severing victims]].
* [
* Just type the words 'skater' and 'nuts' into [[YouTube]]'s search engine if you get an enjoyment out of [[Share the Male Pain|wincing.]]
* Marcus Junius Brutus, during the assassination of [[Gaius Julius Caesar|Caesar]], elected to stab him in the nuts. Some say that this was an indication that Brutus thought he was actually Caesar's illegitimate son, but how much credence can be given to the theory is debated.
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