Narm/Literature: Difference between revisions

 

* ''[[The Chronicles of Narnia]]'' ([[Incredibly Lame Pun|Narm-ia?]]) has several of these, but one of the best is after Puddleglum's [[Moment of Awesome|awesome]] [[Shut UP, Hannibal]] in ''The Silver Chair.'' What do the others do? Do they stand in awed silence? Come up with their own arguments? Draw their swords? No, they say this:

** The reason Puddleglum has that moment also qualifies. The Green Witch was attempting to [[Brainwashed|make the characters forget that the surface is real]]. This involves her asking for every magnificent surface concept, "Please, what is this [insert concept here]?" ''Over and over and over.''

*** YMMV, of course. That scene always freaked me out as a kid, still gives me the shivers today, and several of my friends agree.

** The BBC radio adaptation of ''The Lion, The Witch, And the Wardrobe'' was generally a rather good adaptation for the new medium, with solid voice acting and plenty of original lines. However, it does include a ham-tastic line from Jadis:

* Jacqueline Carey is a great writer. But, in the beginning of her book ''Banewreaker,'' right in the middle of her description of the mythic beginnings of the world, is this:

* [[Forgotten Realms|RA Salvatore]]: "You deserve the wrath of Pook!" If you think that line is hilarious ''now'', wait till you realize it comes out of ''Artemis Entreri's'' mouth. That's right, the supposedly coldest and most repressed assassin of the series once went around screaming a name one letter away from [[Garfield and Friends|Garfield's]] teddy bear. Uh, Salvatore, we love your [[Crazy Awesome|fight scenes]], but what is up with your dialogue?

** Yeah, yeah, we know, Pook is a dangerous guy; but come on! ''He's almost [[Garfield]]'s teddy bear!''

** Even better, in ''Exile'' (book two of the Dark Elf trilogy):

"No. I am your... mother!" }}

* "Sucks to your ass-mar!" from [[Lord of the Flies]].

** A bunch of boys naked on an island saying things like "sucks to your ass-mar". [[Ho Yay|What do you mean, it's not homoerotic?]]

* From [[The Lord of the Rings]]:

* The epilogue of ''[[Harry Potter]] and the Deathly Hallows'' received derision for being cheesy, overly sappy, or like a bad [[Fanfic]], despite the author's presumed sincerity in the final scene of her long-running series.

** JKR often overdoes it with {{spoiler|Snape's various [[Awesome Moments]].}} Remember "I, THE HALF BLOOD PRINCE?" or "Look... at... me..."

*** Not so much the death as the funeral. Not anything specific, just the over-the-top way it was written.

** There's also a line in ''Order of the Phoenix''.

** It gives you the image of a grown man wailing like a toddler.

** Then, of course, there's the sentence in Deathly Hallows: "Death was with them like a presence." Not only is it tautologous (death was with them like something that was with them),

** This troper will cite the same defence against that argument that was used on the Harry Potter Companion website: "with them like a presence" is intended to mean "with them as if it were the Grim Reaper or a reasonable facsimile", which doesn't qualify as this trope.

** In-universe, Harry thinks pretty much any time the Dursleys show emotion is Narmy, mostly involving Petunia and Dudley. Whenever the Dursleys show affection for each other, expect Harry to "suppress the urge to laugh".

** The first sentence of ''Eragon''--something like "wind howled through the night, carrying a scent that would change the world." And in ''Eldest'', Eragon {{spoiler|is transformed into a half-elf, half-human, calls himself a "princeling," and is}} "more beautiful than any man, more rugged than any elf". Clearly Paolini wanted his readers to be in awe, but...

*** [http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0439.html Only because he'll never be this cool.]

** In ''Eldest'', the scene where Arya meets some elves, and they form a ring and dance around her for a few minutes, singing. All fine and dandy, if, like Paolini you are not English. If you are, you can't help but be reminded of [[wikipedia:Morris dance|Morris dancing.]] Which is hilarious.

** Oromis's [[Ho Yay|hairless groin.]]

** And then there's the scene in ''Eldest'' in which Eragon reads his poem to the elves. Judging by the praise they heap on him, we're meant to be awe-inspired. Unfortunately, the poem is not the lyrical opus the elves praise it as, but an atrociously written, borderline [[Emo Teen]]'s love poem. There is neither rhyme nor meter, and it refers to eyes as 'enigmatic pools'.

*** Lord Dathedr then says "you have a rare talent Shadeslayer," which makes this troper think he is a secret [[Deadpan Snarker]].

*** This goes for almost any of the verse Paolini includes in the Cycle - he confines himself to Blank verse with almost no metre or indeed poetic attributes of any kind.

*** It's even worse is you're familiar with [[The Modest Orgasm|a certain French euphemism]].

** There is also a scene in which the sight of a bee saves Eragon from the brink of death.

* The amount of [[Narm]] in ''[[Sword of Truth]]'' depends on your political background (if you're a liberal, his ''dedication page'' in [http://asoiaf.westeros.org/index.php?showtopic=10558&st=80&p=387035&#entry387035 one book] is a narm). The one thing everyone can agree on is that the evil chicken that cackled was hilarious. The collection of Narms can be found [http://sandstormreviews.blogspot.com/2006/08/goodkind-parodies.html http://sandstormreviews.blogspot.com/2006/08/goodkind-parodies.html here].

** Most of those make a '''lot''' [[It Makes Sense in Context|more sense in context,]] and a few are either false or worded to be deliberately misleading. But the "chicken that is not a chicken," the stupidly long speeches, and the flip-flopping about whether he can eat meat are indisputably Narm.

* Arguably, the entirety of ''[[The Duchess Of Malfi]]''. You've got to love a play where someone gets poisoned by a Bible, there's an echo-ey grave, mad men are cavorting around outside a jail, the heroine holds a dead man's hand ... And a mad incestuous Prince thinks he's a werewolf and later says, "I account this world but a dog kennel." The Cardinal's reaction on being stabbed? "You have hurt me." Oh, dear. The doctor tries to cure Ferdinand of his madness and thinking he's a dog by... trying to fight him. Also, the number of people hiding behind tapestries.

** Bosola is with both the leads when they die...and has howlers both times. With the duchess, he responds to her brief revival and subsequent final death with a mildly frustrated, "Oh, she's gone again!" With Antonio, he gets the following tactless exchange:

"Are murdered." }}

** Most Jacobean drama is like this, which is why it's awesome.

** If it's a [[Phlebotinum Breakdown|Harrier]], then repairable condition is as close as you're getting to perfect.

* Thanks to [[Purple Prose]], the ''[[Twilight (novel)|Twilight]]'' books have lots of this. One of the best was when Edward was holding his and Bella's baby:

** [[Bishie Sparkle|Sparkly]] [[Our Vampires Are Different|vampires]]. The point of the meadow scene ''is'' that Edward sparkles, literally. ''And'' he says that it's the body of a killer.

** In the second book, Edward attempts to kill himself ''by sparkling''.

* Nat's first night at Plumfield in ''Little Men'', when Demi goes into his room and winds up telling him the entire life of Christ as a bedtime story.

** The [[Glurge]]-tastic coverage given to the boys at Plumfield with disabilities, physical or mental.

*** Patronizing tone aside, the best part is that "led him to believe" unintentionally implies [[Lies to Children|that it isn't even true]].

* Also from [[Louisa May Alcott]], ''Jo's Boys'' goes into great detail about how wonderful Amy and Laurie's wedded bliss has been, including expounding at length on their perfect daughter.

* In ''[[A Man for All Seasons]]''. Margaret's comeback to her father's saying something typically [[Deadpan Snarker]]-like (if that can be said of Thomas More) was something along the lines of 'You're very gay.' She meant cheery and glad, [[Have a Gay Old Time|but...]]

* Quite possibly the most infamous Narm moment in all of literature:

** [[A Wrinkle in Time|I do beg your pardon!]]

** It refers to a novel by Edward Bulwer-Lytton, which is much longer and much worse. Madeline L'Engle referenced it to underline her theme of redemption.

** Most of Wilde's children's stories contain Narm and soppy morals. Most Victorian moral stories for children do. Wilde's work [[Crossing the Line Twice|crosses the line twice]] -- you have to barrel through the narm and then double back and start crying like a girl.

* ''[[Wild Cards]]'' has its share of narm, but in particular this line:

* ''[[The Lottery Rose]]'' features a scene where a young mentally handicapped boy is killed from an attack...by a group of ducks. Special mention for the use of the phrase "Their hungry quacking" for creepy build-up.

** It's possible that the ducks somehow panicked him into falling into the nearby pond; the scene cuts away right before the crucial moment (understandably, in a YA novel). Bear in mind that the kid in question is supposed to have a mental age of only about two or three.

*** That may be, but... "hungry quacking."

* [[A Streetcar Named Desire]] has a scene when Stella talks about how her abusive husband, on their wedding night, smashed all the light fittings in the hotel room with her slipper. The sheer ''randomness'' of that action, combined with a slipper being the silliest weapon ever, makes it hilarious.

* The poet and classical scholar A. E. Housman brilliantly '''parodied''' translation-induced [[Narm]] in "Fragment of a Greek Tragedy":

But thine arithmetic is quite correct. }}

* The dramatic scene in [[Clan of the Cave Bear]] in which Ayla accidentally {{spoiler|uncovers the mog-urs of the various clans cannibalizing the brain of the man slain by a cave bear in a ceremony}} becomes quite amusing when it hits you that the man's name was [[Gorn]].

** Maybe what he was feeling was peristalsis. Which not only shares a couple of leading syllables, also it's something which '''''can''' be felt''!

* ''[[Warrior Cats]]'':

"You musn't keep doing that!" }}

** You know, saying "Stop it!" would have been much easier.

* This line from Miley Cyrus's memoir, ''Miles to Go'':

* LJ Smith's [[Vampire Diaries]]:

Meredith: "Jerk!" }}

** "Jerk"? Seriously? The guy's a sociopath and a murderer who's trying to {{spoiler|rape one of your best friends}}, and "Jerk" is the worst insult you can come up with?

* [[A Song of Ice and Fire]]:

Eddard: "For true." }}

** Since Arya is very young, laughing at this dialogue might be politically incorrect. And we know what happens to the politically incorrect in [[A Song of Ice and Fire]]!

** The name "Jon Snow" makes a lot of British readers think of [[wikipedia:Jon Snow|the Channel 4 newsreader and investigative journalist.]] It wears off quickly enough, but in early scenes one can't help but visualize this old, white-haired man at the wall.

* In ''The Good Guy,'' a novel by [[Dean Koontz]], there's a fantastic line that completely breaks the flow of the scenario. A killer is stalking the two main characters. Seeing the killer's car outside waiting for them causes this line (referring to the male hero) to be typed:

* A minor example, but [[Tamora Pierce]]'s [[Tortall Universe|Beka Cooper]] books have the police force, who were called "Dogs" enough that they embraced the nickname, think of themselves as Dogs, call their newbies Puppies and their holding pens "kennels", have to clarify "four-legged dogs" for actual canines, so on. Fine. But sometimes, they go too far. There's a mention of "The Growl", when a large number of Dogs in a tavern together get personal about a case - a few start growling, then more and more, and then all of the ones in the tavern are growling and it terrifies any non-Dog. But that sounds ridiculous. It sounds like a bunch of tough-looking uniformed adults going "Grrr!" together.

* The [[Circle of Magic]] books have many scenes where some mean adult insinuates that the kids aren't awesome in every way and they then prove their skills in a way that renders the adult reeling and speechless. There are so many of these scenes that they collectively become Narmy, and some of them are cheesy. The worst is that one in ''Will of the Empress'' when Briar fights the nobleman.

** It should be noted that Lovecraft actually had a cat with that name at the time of that story's writing. Yeah...

** Similarly, the cat in "In Cold Blood" is called Boobs.

** [[Sarcasm Mode|OH DEAR HEAVENS,]] ''[[Sarcasm Mode|NO!]]'' [[Sarcasm Mode|Surely, this terrible revelation is comparable to having one's mind destroyed by seeing an Elder God!]] [[Face Palm|* facepalm* ]]

*** That degree of racism was considered ridiculous and unpleasant even at the time. Besides, the point being made is not that Lovecraft's racism discredits his whole work, but merely that it makes certain scenes lose their impact to the modern reader because of the laughter/fury/FlatWhat factor it causes.

** Some of Lovecraft's names were [[Inherently Funny Words|hilarious]]. ''The Whisperer in Darkness'' had the potential to be absolutely terrifying, but the phrase "Fungi from Yuggoth" ''sounds'' amusing.

*** If you know actual Arabic, the [[As Long as It Sounds Foreign]] name of Abdul Alhazred is actually [[Department of Redundancy Department|redundant]]. "Abdul" means "Servant/Slave of the". So if "Hazred" meant anything, than "Abdul Alhazred" would mean "Slave of the the (whatever it meant)." Anything that has two definite articles comes off a little Narmy.

** The Joker has probably already done that in the comics.

* The ''[[Alex Rider]]'' novel ''Point Blank.'' The villain's plot is called Project Gemini. There was a famous [[Real Life]] space program called Project Gemini back in the 1960s. So, this novel has lines like these:

** And we wonder why the American space program has stalled out.

* No one has quite yet worked out what possessed Gabriel García Márquez to use the phrase "wormy guava grove of love" in ''[[One Hundred Years of Solitude]]''.

** That might be the translator's fault...

* The end of ''[[My Sister's Keeper]]'', when {{spoiler|Anna is killed in a car accident}}. It's so [[Glurge|obviously designed]] to be a [[Tear Jerker]] that it becomes Narm. The [[Debate and Switch]] doesn't help.

* ''The Ruins'' is a creepy book in which a group of tourists end up trapped on a hill with a man-eating plant. For most of the book, the plant is scary, especially when it's revealed that the plant is sentient and enjoys screwing with them. Then it starts speaking in German.

* From the Dutch novella ''Onmacht'':

** [[It Makes Sense in Context]], but even then it sounds ridiculous.

* Stephen King's ''It'' -- specifically, that scene at the very end of the book. You know the one. The one where 12-year-old Beverly has to help her six friends escape the sewers. Her method, and why it is Narm, is best left unexplained.... <ref>Why is this book legal?</ref><ref>They have {{spoiler|sex}}. </ref>

* Stephen Hand's novelizations of ''[[The Texas Chainsaw Massacre]]'' and ''[[Freddy vs. Jason]]'', and his original novel ''[[Friday the 13th]]: Carnival of Maniacs'', while decent, occasionally descend into... weird [[Purple Prose]].

* The death of Anji's boyfriend Dave in the [[Doctor Who]] [[Eighth Doctor Adventures]] novel ''Escape Velocity'', a lousy installment in an otherwise [[Gushing About Shows You Like|great series]]:

** The screams of laughter from the readers reached the novel, which then exploded.

* Mariel in ''Mariel of Redwall'' is the High Queen of Mood Swings. After a mean old squirrel refuses to travel with her:

** Five seconds later, she's back, and [[Angst? What Angst?|everything's fine]]. She does this sort of thing repeatedly.

*** She stabilizes a bit once she gets her memory back.

* The first six ''[[Nightmare On Elm Street]]'' films had extremely rare hardcover [[Novelization|novelizations]]. These books appear to have been written for [[Misaimed Marketing|very young readers.]] Horror + [[Moral Guardians]] [[The Eighties|'80s-style]] = Narm.

* [[The Saga of Seven Suns]]. The [[A Is]] are called Compies. The Gypsy-In-Space Roamers call their enemy, Basil Wenceslas, "The Big Goose." This is like a transplanted bedtime story. And the entire series hinges on [[Elemental Rock-Paper-Scissors]].

* [[The Saga of Darren Shan]] gives us one of its vampire varieties named "Vampaneze". No. It's not a parody. And they're the scary, evil vampires! You'd think an author would spend more than 5 minutes thinking up a name for the race of a major villain, but here we go!

* The [[Star Wars Expanded Universe]] book [[Fatal Alliance]] gives us this wonderful part after a Jedi Padawan saves a Sith Apprentice's life, from her point of view: "The Jedi had saved her, and she wrenched herself from him, even as she felt a twinge of gratitude. Surely he hadn't done it out of the vile goodness of his heart!" Yes. ''Vile goodness''. Just in case you didn't know that the Sith were evil with a capital E...<ref>She's [[Tsundere]], so to speak, and hating the fact that she had to be rescued by a 'good guy' when Sith usually consider themselves [[Above Good and Evil]].</ref>

* The [[Wham! Episode|final chapter]] of the eleventh ''[[Haruhi Suzumiya]]'' novel <ref>Which is the reason it's listed here and not under Anime & Manga</ref> is truly ''epic'' Narm. Fujiwara's conversation with {{spoiler|Mikuru}} during the former's [[Villainous Breakdown]] has both characters sound like they are in a [[Soap Opera]]. It's kind of hard to take the words, {{spoiler|"I don't want to lose you again, [[Long Lost Sibling|Onee-san!]]"}} seriously when it's [[Smug Snake|Fujiwara]] saying them. And it doesn't help that there is a ''very'' melodramatic illustration for this scene which looks like it was taken out of a [[Shoujo]] manga.)

* While ''[[The Lovely Bones]]'' generally has very good prose, it's hard to take this line seriously:

* ''Sisterhood'' series by [[Fern Michaels]]: This popped up a few times. For instance, some of the conversations between Jack and Harry fall victim to this because Jack called Harry "you big silly!" A number of reviewers reported having laughed at lines like that, because they know for a fact that men do not talk to each other like that in [[Real Life]].

** In addition, the series is heavy on [[Melodrama]], which has led to [[Narm]] a few times. For example, Kathryn's rant about how the law works for the criminal in ''Fast Track'' is hard to take seriously, because they are in the U.S.A., and the law is certainly not supposed to work for the criminal there!

 

{{reflist}}