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Line 1: {{~~work~~creator}} * "Before we start, let's recap a little on the whole prequel thing and how it ruined six years of everyone's lives. Even starving African children in Cambodia." Let that sink in. Starving African children in Cambodia (which is next to Vietnam). * "Star Wars Episode I is the most disappointing thing since my son." Line 11: * [[Mushroom Samba\|"ThE bESt PArt of waAAkING UP, is ACiD in YoUR CUuu...."]] * "If I wanted a message I would go listen to my answering machine" {{quote\| Answering Machine: Hi Mr. Plinkett, Bob Foster here from the Department of Cultural Guilt, uh, just a friendly courtesy call to remind you about the horrible things that you did to the Native Americans. Uh, please continue to feel guilty about this, and, uh, if you have any questions, give me a call back, the number's 202-(Plinkett proceeds to pour coffee on the answering machine, shorting it out)}} Even better, it later cuts back to him smashing the machine with a hammer. "GET OUUUT!!!! GET OUUUUUUUUUT!!!!" Line 27: * Plinkett's phone call. * Him slowly going insane at the end of the "Baby's Day Out" review. {{quote\| "My cat stole my merkins!"~~<br />~~ "You want to help me milk my cock?" (picture of a [[Visual Pun\|rooster]])<br /> "Maybe they're trying to make a statement about the Gerber corporation and their anti-Union practices!"<br /> Line 35: * [[Star Wars]] [[Attack of the Clones]] is the worst thing ever made by a human. Except for the [[What Do You Mean It's Not Heinous?\|bagpipes...]] * (on [[Romantic Plot Tumor\|Anakin and Padme's 'love story']]) {{quote\| "Now you say 'Maybe they ARE in love, and maybe I just don't see it 'cause I'm a [[Serial Killer\|psychopath]] who butchers women.' [[Dumbass Has a Point\|Well-yeah-meh-sneh]]..."}} * A more subtle example is in the ''Phantom Menace'' review; he talks about how the hero arc works, and how the hero often gets the girl at the end as icing on the cake, and he plays several such scenes from various movies together as an example...including [[Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory\|Willy Wonka hugging Charlie Bucket]]. * OH NO the timeline changed and Bambi's alive again except now shes my first cat! Line 51: * "GET YER FINGER OUT OF MY ASS WALLET!" * "The Urban Market stole my TV once, so I know they like movies." * "They don't call him "Kit Fisto" because he's into chicks, [[~~Lampshaded~~If ~~Double~~You ~~Entendre~~Know What I Mean\|if you know what I mean]]." * His attempt to save time on "Cop Dog." Bonus points for {{spoiler\|realizing it was a bad idea, not because he was completely incomprehensible, but because he forgot to mention a few films. He then tries again}} only to continue as normal. "Who was his trainer, Mike Vick? Did you get the joke?" Line 58: This is worse than Star Trek: Nemesis. * His ill-fated Kodak promo. {{quote\| "What?! After fucking ten years, '''''that's all I saved?!''''' '''''YOU PIECE OF FUCKING CRAP!'''''"}} * The random guy in the background who picks apart Picard's plan to puncture the plasma coolant tanks. {{quote\| '''Random Guy''': Oh, puncture it. Okaaay... but it seems like it's highly pressurised...~~<br />~~ (Data gets sprayed with flesh-melting gas)~~<br />~~ '''Random Guy''': Oh my God...! }} * Cleaning up cat shit to the tune of La Danse Macabre. Line 67: * The entire [[Alternate DVD Commentary\|commentary for Episode 1.]] Plinkett rambles about the movie, his cats, his life, laundry, [[Call Back\|Bambi]], and so much more, getting interrupted by his cats, [[Talking to Himself\|Gold Shirt Guy, and Not-Darth-Sidious]]. It's amazing. After ranting about how if he were in the movie he'd consider Padme "expendable," thinking that she was just a handmaiden who "does the Queen's laundry," Plinkett goes off on this tangent: {{quote\| "When I was 58 I learned how to do my own laundry. They say the clothes make the man. You know what else they say? … 'Indonesians make the clothes.' … Both statements are kinda true statements. But I really like doin' laundry …"}} Plinkett urging people to "occupy George Lucas's front lawn" because he's one of the 1% ** Plinkett giving the people he presumes are listening to his commentary while sitting in a theater watching Episode 1 in 3D instructions to do things like raise their hand or talk to the person next to them. Line 77: {{reflist}} [[Category:Web Original/Funny]] [[Category:~~Red Letter Media~~RedLetterMedia]] [[Category:Funny]]