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A carbosilicate amorph, Schlock is the titular mercenary who joined Tagon's Toughs in the first strip. He outwardly resembles a mobile, talking pile of poop with eyes, and is possessed of a childlike lack of morals, enthusiastic love of violence, and an enormous appetite. He is also a remarkably adept warrior whose strange biology and unexpectedly sharp mind gives him many advantages over his opponents. And where that fails, Schlock compensates with guns; many, ''many'' guns.
 
* [[Adult Child]]: Many of the things he says (or just the way he says them) give this impression. Which is accurate, as he was (uniquely) created as an adult mind with no memories or developed sense of morality. Also, while he's only mildly annoyed by things like bullets, technically amorph physiology means all damage is brain damage.
* [[Air Vent Passageway]]: He is an amorphous blob who can easily squeeze through holes as small as his eyes. He has, at least twice, also used the air vents (well, sewer system) to enter.
* [[Ambiguous Innocence]]: he's often mistaken for a psychopath due to his enthusiasm for violence, but he is capable of true friendship and loyalty as well.
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* [[Puppy Dog Eyes]]: All the time, though with rather limited success.
* [[Running Gag]]: Schlock's "default" shape is an amorphous pile of greenish-brown matter. Most people, upon seeing him, mistake him for the, ahem, ''leavings'' of a very large and very ''sick'' animal. Also, Schlock being [[Lightning Bruiser|"faster than he looks."]]
* [[Seldom-Seen Species]]: Until Schlock got his own cartoon, Amorphs weren't widely known throughout the galaxy. [http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2007-08-25 ApparentlyAs far as commonly known], less than 200 of them have ever left their homeworld.] Schlock himself [http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2008-03-09 usually just rolls with it.]
* [[Sphere Eyes]]: Amorphs doesn't have eyes naturally - they grow on a certain kind of tree and are literal spheres. (Schlock himself uses a pair that are [[Mismatched Eyes|mismatched in size]], while other Amorphs have been seen using more or less than that.)
* [[Starfish Aliens]]: Specifically limited to his [[Silicon-Based Life|physiology]], as he (usually) relates pretty easily to his teammates otherwise.
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* [[Shout-Out]]: Originally he spoke only in quotes from ''[[Warcraft II]]''.
 
==== Tagioalisi ("Tagii", "Chinook") ====
Masterwork of Para - the warship AI built from scratch, since TAG experienced fatal breakdown and needed replacement, and Ennesby never was a proper tactical ''or'' ship AI in the first place.
 
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* [[Spaceship Girl]]: Female personality was made on purpose.
 
==== "Chinook" ====
Two more changes of hardware, one more "friendly parity check", and we meet Tag 3.0 - except not "Tag" any more.
 
* [[Deus Est Machina]]: After replacing "the angry god", learning from Petey and being nicknamed "Goddess of Earth, Wind and Plumbing" by Schlock this just seemed natural.
* [[Huge Holographic Head]]: On occasion. Apparently, [[Bigger Is Better]], and it's still modestly disproportional to the new hardware size, after all.
* [[Insult Backfire]]: Schlock referred to Chinook as "Goddess of Earth, Wind and Plumbing" while grouchy. [[Deus Est Machina|If only he knew...]]
* [[Me's a Crowd]]: Already multitasking to run a giant space station, with nodes in great many robots scurrying around it - and, of course, maintains local and long-range communication. And there's also an attendant space fleet now, because (defences were needed yesterday, andwhile growing and testing necessary to have a ''dependable'' AI takes time, - as TAGwas 1.0pointed out by Ennesby earlier and demonstrated by TAG 1.0 breaking down). And then a [[Wetware Body|corporeal avatar]].
* [[Try to Fit That on A Business Card]]: She seems to collect fancy sounding titles as a hobby or something.
{{quote|'''Thurl''': Chinook, of Eina-Afa... Goddess of Earth, Wind and Plumbing... Our Sentinel of Perpetual Overwatch... Cryptkeeper, Vaultminder, Stormtender, [[Brick Joke|Spider Queen]]... Wealservant, Avenging Deputy... Warm Breath Upon the Holy Wind...
'''Chinook''': If you read the whole list every time I show up, I'm going to stop calling ahead. }}
* [[Wetware Body]]: Chinook eventually followed Petey's example and made a "networked meatspace node" avatar matching her holographic avatar. The windy, elfy one. With lean version of [[Impossible Hourglass Figure]]. Given that not only Chinook has access to resources so vast that a space fleet probably more expensive than any currentcurrently active in the GalaxyMilky Way (''maybe'' excluding the Fleetmind) was found collecting dust in a side storeroom, and a good part of it apparently still does - but she have to oversee a planet-scale cloning operation and met some creatures who gave a lip to the [[Huge Holographic Head]] (even as they cowered before it), the right question here is "why not?"
 
 
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==== Thnempha, Andy ====
An enthusiastic Fobott'r mercenary, whose species possesses four arms. Andy is usually in the company of Legs or Schlock, and his multiple limbs make him an effective combatant. May have something going on with Tandersil (the Fobott'r with dishevelled yellowish crest from Sanctum Adroit) - thanks to Schlock, however unlikely this may sound.
May have something going on with Tandersil (the Fobott'r with dishevelled yellow-green crest from Sanctum Adroit) - thanks to Schlock, however unlikely this may sound.
 
* [[Expressive Ears]]: [http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2014-11-10 Can droop], at least.
* [[Multi Wielding]]: He brags about being able to quad wield, having four arms. Thurl is unimpressed, since Andy only has two eyes and therefore wouldn't be able to aim properly at more than one target - not that this stops him from trying.
{{quote|'''Thurl:''' I'll put down 'very enthusiastic' and 'seen too many John Woo movies.' }}
* [[Multi-Armed and Dangerous]]
 
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==== Ventura, Para ====
A young human girl who joined the toughsToughs as a "roboticist." An expert in all things mechanical, she is just as adept as Kevyn when it comes to machinery and adept at general science, although her skills are more focused on AI and robotics. Unaccustomed to combat, Para has some issues with violence, and the first two violent escapades she encountered left her a nervous wreck afterwards.
 
* [[Action Girl]]: [[Deconstruction]]. She has not undergone proper soldier training, she ''has'' killed before, and she suffers PTSD in combat for it. That's not to say she can't be very useful [[Wrench Wench|in her own way.]] On the other hand...
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* [[The Dreaded]]: Among robots and AIs.
* [[Heroic BSOD]]: Suffers one after killing several thugs in self defense, and continues to have bouts of PTSD long afterward when placed in combat situations.
* [[Hidden Depths]]: Possibly, since the recentlater storyline shows she knows [[Spy Speak]], and probably{{spoiler|may either isbe involved with UNS intelligence or "merely" spied on the spies for lulz with her(confirmed robotsnow)}}.
* {{spoiler|[[Internal Affairs]]: Confirmed to be an agent of UNS Int-Aff-Int. Before she was caught - then presumed killed. }}
* [[Older Than They Look]]: Looked young but not particularly childish when she [http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2008-03-27 first appeared], but got caught flat-footed by [[Art Evolution]].
* [[Puppy Dog Eyes]]: Unlike Schlock, she can actually pull it off effectively.
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==== Flinders, Kathryn ====
A former UNS military intelligence officer, Kathryn encountered the Toughs while coordinating a group of vandalizing free-runners inside Mall One. She keepskept getting dragged into weird scrapes with the Toughs, working for them on-again-off-again. Of course, she noticed their uncanny ability to get into troubles.
 
* [[Action Girl]]
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* [[It's a Small World After All]]: She was on {{spoiler|[http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2011-02-09 Tunguska] when Xinchub caught Toughs and his overlong gloating got the thing broken}}.
* [[Rapunzel Hair]]
* {{spoiler|[[Retired Badass]]}}
 
==== Gyo, Doythaban ====
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* [[AI Is a Crapshoot]]: Non-evil example, but he ''clearly'' did not work out as intended.
* [[Cranial Processing Unit]]: Averted, it's even commented on how it would be foolish to stick a robot's AI core in a bit sticking out at the end. AndOf apparentlycourse, hitting the part that actually contains the core won't always work either.
* [[Humongous Mecha]]: BuiltAn upright walking robot built from the damaged chassis of a flying ''tank.'', anyway.
* [[Teleport Spam]]: "The building has now been evacuated. Rapid teraporting is fun!"
* [[Third Person Person]]: Lota is too large for your puny pronouns.
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* [[Theme Naming]]: Petey's fleet of warships. Pterodactyl, Perjurious Discourse, Pretentious Drivel, Predictably Damaged (I-VI), Priority Delivery, Painstakingly Defenestrated, Polysyllabic Designation, etc.
* [[Wetware Body]]: Cloned himself an O'benn. And then many others. Because certain security measures can be used only by living beings. And it makes a nice disguise. Also, this helps to see the Universe through meatsacks' eyes (for example, Petey has a hypothesis that itching may contribute to O'benn attitude). And it seems that having an option for presence "more real" than common avatar floating over a holographic projector helps with diplomacy.
* [[Xanatos Gambit]]: So very much. One of his plans was found out (by another AI) only because anybody else ''would have been too short-sighted''.
 
==== Tagon, Karl ====
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* [[Shout-Out]]: He's a cameo of the creator of ''Nukees''.
* [[You Gotta Have Blue Hair]]
 
==== Admiral Emm ====▼
* [[Brutal Honesty]]: When she can afford it, makes no bones about morbid sides of her job.▼
* [[Hypocrite]]: She called Kowalski a monster and is surprised when he mentions having conscience... not only his latest monstrous deeds were performed under her command, but later his clone mentions that "she always wanted ''more'' like me".▼
* [[Well-Intentioned Extremist]]▼
 
==== General Bala-Amin ====
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==== "Tenzy" ====
A fun-sized superweapon illegally created by an UNS covert agent (and later possibly upgraded by a high-end AI). Since AI is officially rated as fully sapient, legally it cannot be simply turned off once things go all public and legitimate.
 
* [[Cute Machines]]: Tenzy made her now-autonomous upper part somewhat resemble [[WALL-E|EVE]].
* [[Do-Anything Robot]]: Now theThe former M3 is not as much "handheld weapon" now as "space cruiser in a small backpack". Let's see - heavily armed, can fly, [http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2015-03-23 has good sensors], networked, hacks at least stupid (but ''very'' well protected) SI as fast as you can "feed" them to it, contains a nano-manufacturing factory (tiny, but high-end). Oh, and AI more than capable of using all this ''creatively'' and still not being too busy to banter with the "wielder". What this kit ''cannot'' do?
* [[Easily-Detachable Robot Parts]]/[[Independent Limb]]: After rebuilding herself, Tenzy can separate in two parts. The upper is flight capable quasi-humanoid with "face" that talks with the organics and has guns, the lower is the backpack base, presumably contains the mini-fabber and other supplies.
* [[Mobile Factory]]: The original M3 fired stun ordnance fitting for every known species and apparentlyimplied producedto produce reloads internally. AfterThen beingupgraded givenwith mil-spec nanoassemblers and AI programmed to be useful rather than frustrating, it was- intended tofor makeproduction thingsand likecoordinated use of assorted ordnance that could be more useful for assassination of protected targets - including [[Projected Man|decoy drones]] and smart micro-missiles. Then it was given ''another'' field upgrade, specifically intended to [[Army of One|allow a single officer to take on an armored and heavily armed force of at least hundreds]], resulting in "Tenzy". On-screen had some flying gun drones said to be built from other M3-s (and later from random scrap) and made fully functional (and heavy duty looking) prosthetics. And [http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2015-05-31 expressed confidence] in her ability to replicate, if need be.
* [[Robot Buddy]]
* [[The Symbiote]]: Tenzy and Landon established a [http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2015-05-31 strange symbiosis]. It's not only working together, or that he carries the "bag" part around and has a prosthetic arm built by her, there [http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2015-07-05 seems to be] some interfacing with his other implants.
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'''Landon''': Tenzy... you're my ''everything''.
'''Tenzy''': I'm blushing. Let me get that door for you, hon. }}
 
 
==== Colonel Menendez ====
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* [[Green-Skinned Space Babe]]: She's a "[http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2003-03-11 purp]" — modified human with pale violet skin (it's photosynthetic).
* [[Ship Teasing]]: With Tagon, though he's not interested
 
▲==== Admiral Emm ====
▲* [[Brutal Honesty]]: When she can afford it, makes no bones about more morbid sides of her job.
▲* [[Hypocrite]]: She called Kowalski a monster and is surprised when he mentions having conscience... not onlyyet his latest "monstrous" deeds were all performed under her command, butand later his clone mentions that "she always wanted ''more'' like me".
▲* [[Well-Intentioned Extremist]]
 
{{reflist}}
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