Skippy's List: Difference between revisions
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''Skippy's List'' proves that [[The Loonie]] can be applied to the military as well as [[Tabletop Games]]. The list consists of things that Skippy--an enlisted man in the US Army's psychological operations department
The original list [https://web.archive.org/web/20131109164111/http://skippyslist.com/list/ can be seen here.] The site also includes other sections with other, smaller lists submitted by "Friends of Skippy".
See also ''[[Things Mr. Welch Is No Longer Allowed to Do In An RPG]]''
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* [[Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking]]:
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* [[Arson, Murder, and Lifesaving]]: He actually got ''commended'' for some of these, specifically:
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* [[Awesome McCoolname]]:
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37. Our medic is called "Sgt Larwasa", not "Dr. Feelgood".
38. Our supply Sgt is "Sgt Watkins" not "Sugar Daddy". }}
* [[Because Destiny Says So]]:
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* [[Black Magic]]:
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4. Not allowed to challenge anyone's disbelief of black magic by asking for hair. }}
* [[Body Paint]]:
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73. [[Braveheart|Woad]] is not camouflage makeup. }}
* [[Breast Expansion]]:
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* [[Brick Joke]]:
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131. No dancing in the turret. This especially applies in conjunction with rule #113. }}
* [[Buffy-Speak]]:
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* [[Calvin Ball]]:
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* [[Cheese-Eating Surrender Monkeys]]:
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* [[Combining Mecha]]:
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* [[
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81. May not bring a drag queen to the battalion formal dance. }}
* [[Dead Baby Comedy]]:
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* [[Dirty Communists]]:
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* [[Dude, Not Funny]]: [[In
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* [[Duel to
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188. May not challenge officers to "Meet me on the field of honor, at dawn". }}
* [[Everything Is Big in Texas]]:
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* [[Exact Words]]:
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34. (Next day) Not allowed to chew gum at formation even if I ''did'' bring enough for everybody.
48. I may not use public masturbation as a tool to demonstrate a flaw in a command decision.
55. An order to "Put Kiwi on my boots" does *not* involve fruit.
56. An order to "Make my Boots black and shiny" does not involve electrical tape. }}
* [[Flat Earth Atheist]]:
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* [[Full-Frontal Assault]]:
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* [[Genre Savvy]]: Eventually, his COs caught onto his looniness.
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87. If the thought of something makes me giggle for longer than 15 seconds, I am to assume that I am not allowed to do it. }}
* [[Gilligan Cut]]:
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34. (Next day) Not allowed to chew gum at formation even if I *did* bring enough for everybody. }}
* [["Have a Nice Day" Smile]]:
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* [[I Just Shot Marvin in
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* [[It's Raining Men]]:
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* [[Jumping
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* [[The Loonie]]
* [[Loophole Abuse]]:
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125. Two drink limit does not mean two kinds of drinks.
126. Two drink limit does not mean the drinks can be as large as I like.
127. "No Drinking Of Alcoholic Beverages" does not imply that a Jack Daniel's® IV is acceptable.
135. An order to put polish on my boots means the whole boot. }}
* [[Monster Clown]]:
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* [[Nice Hat]]: "Nice" may not be the correct adjective, but it was doubtless a remarkable hat.
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* [[Noodle Incident]]:
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* [[Noodle Implement]]:
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200. My chain of command is not interested in why I "just happen" to have a kilt, an inflatable sheep, and a box of rubber bands in the back of my car. }}
* [["Not Making This Up" Disclaimer]]:
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* [[Or So I Heard]]:
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209. An airsickness bag is to be used for airsickness *only*. (Also not a Skippy-ism...this was the same dinner.) }}
* [[Our Lawyers Advised This Trope]]: Why we can post at least part of his list.
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* [[Patriotic Fervor]]:
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* [[Perfectly Cromulent Word]]:
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* [[Reference Overdosed]]:
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6. Not allowed to play ''[[Pulp Fiction]]'' with a suction-cup dart pistol and any officer.
16. Must get a haircut even if it tampers with my [[The Bible|Samson like powers]].
18. May no longer perform my now (in)famous "Barbie Girl Dance" while on duty.
29. The Irish MPs are not after [[Notable Commercial Campaigns|"Me frosted lucky charms"]].
49. Not allowed to trade military equipment for [[Jack and
50. Not allowed to sell magic beans during duty hours.
51. Not allowed to quote "[[Dr. Seuss]]" on military operations.
52. Not allowed to yell [[G.I. Joe|"Take that Cobra"]] at the rifle range.
53. Not allowed to quote ''[[Full Metal Jacket]]'' at the rifle range.
77. The MP checkpoint is not an [[Star Wars|Imperial Stormtrooper]] roadblock, so I should not tell them [[A New Hope|"You don't need to see my identification, these are not the droids you are looking for."]]
97. [[Ghostbusters|Gozer]] does not dwell in my refrigerator.
99. [[Minesweeper|A smiley face is not used to mark a minefield.]]
113. There is absolutely no need to emulate the people from ''[[The Full Monty|Full Monty]]'' every time I hear the song "Hot Stuff" <ref>(131. No dancing in the turret. This especially applies in conjunction with rule #113.)</ref
128. [[Cannibal!
136. Shouting [[Platoon|"Let's do the village! Let's do the whole fucking village!"]] while out on a mission is bad.
181. [[Pokémon]]® trainer is not an MOS.
185. My name is not [[Dune|a killing word]].
202. Despite the confusing similarity in the names, the "Safety Dance" and the "Safety Briefing" are never to be combined. }}
* [[Rule of Funny]]:
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* [[Running Gag]]: The inflatable sheep.
* [[Sarcastic Confession]]:
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* [[Schmuck Bait]]:
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* [[Sex Sells]]:
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* [[Snipe Hunt]]: Even provides the page quote:
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* [[Sound Off]]: Naturally, there are several things Skippy is not allowed to use in this context.
* [[Suspiciously Specific Denial]]:
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* [[Take Over the World]]:
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* [[Take That]]:
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* [[Technology Marches On]] / [[Life Imitates Art]]: Chem-Light batteries now actually exist.
* [[Team Dad]]:
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* [[Team Mom]]:
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* [[The End of the World
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* [[Too Soon]]:
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* [[Wholesome Crossdresser]]: One story, "The Battalion Dance", relates Skippy and his fellow soldiers being forced to attend a dance they didn't want to. Skippy initially tries attending wearing a dress, but before the dance, someone rats him out and he is not allowed to. Then he meets a transvestite...
* [[Your Soul Is Mine]]
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[[Category:Literature]]
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