The Teletubbies/WMG: Difference between revisions

== The entire show is a delusion by which the inmates of an oppressive prison cope with their incarceration. ==

Locked into a crimethink gulag, their every thought, step and action are controlled by the nigh-omniscient surveillance loudspeakers which tell them everything they must do -- such as watch "educational" propaganda films, exercise in the yard, or eat the disgusting rations of nutritional paste -- that is, "Tubby Custard" -- or waferlike "Tubby Toast." Any attempt to hide from the surveillance causes an immediate alert -- "Where have all the Teletubbies gone?" Is it any wonder the prisoners have covered all of this by replacing it in their minds with a sunny, bucolic landscape of bright cheerful colors, even unto the all-seeing infant "sun"?

* Oh my god, this makes sense.

 

== The SunBaby is God. ==

He created the Teletubbies and their world purely for His amusement. All praise to the SunBaby!

 

== The characters are all in Purgatory, atoning for their sins. ==

The world appears to have recovered from a civilization-destroying nuclear winter. The teletubbies' house looks suspiciously like a bunker. The only animals present are rabbits because they reproduce so fast that they could recover quickly from an atomic war. Same applies to the only plants being grass. The "tubby custard" is an imperishable foodstuff that was stored ''en masse'' in the teletubbies' bunker in case the ground became too irradiated to grow crops. (It didn't, quite, but no one remembers how to grow them.) The teletubbies themselves are mutants, and the baby face in the sun is a cloud of nuclear dust.

 

Something went wrong with that batch of clones in the Hatchery (or they were deliberately produced that way) so instead of entering normal society, they were conditioned as rabbit handlers and housed in a special compound away from everyone else. Apart from consuming vast amounts of tubby toast and tubby custard, their main purpose in life is to stop the rabbits from chewing through any important cables or generally causing havoc. After all, even in a dystopian society you'd need someone to keep the wildlife at bay.