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Things I Am No Longer Allowed To Do At Hogwarts: Difference between revisions
Things I Am No Longer Allowed To Do At Hogwarts (view source)
Revision as of 01:59, 24 November 2016
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Line 156:
* I am not allowed to introduce Peeves to paintballing.
* I am not allowed to introduce myself to the first years as [[Monty Python and the Holy Grail|"Tim the Enchanter"]].
* I am not allowed to [[Locked in a Room|lock Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy in a closet]] to see if [[Ho Yay|hot gay sex will occur]].
* I am not allowed to make lightsaber sound with my wand.
* I am not allowed to paint the house-elves blue.
* I am not allowed to reenact famous battles of the Revolutionary War in the charms corridor.
* I am not allowed to set up a first year on a blind date with Moaning Mrytle.
* I am not allowed to sing my own [[Background Music|personal spy music]] while wandering the hallways.
* I am not allowed to try attacks from ''[[Sailor Moon]]'' to see if they work since I am in a more magical environment.
** I will be held responsible for any damage I cause.
Line 182:
* There is no such thing as the Chamber of Double Secret Probation.
* There is no such thing as an Invisibility Thong.
* There is no such thing as a were-[[w:Thylacine|thylacine]].
* I will not start every Potions class by asking Professor Snape if today's project is suitable for use as a sexual lubricant.
* I will not start [[Food Fight|food fights]] in the Great Hall.
* If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that fact and [[Face Doodling|draw the Dark Mark on their arm]].
* I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways.
* [[The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy|"42"]] is not the answer to every question to the O.W.L.'s.
Line 195:
* The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball.
* I will not, under any circumstances, ask Harry Potter who died and made him boss.
* The [[Easter Bunny]] is not Jesus' Animagus form.
* No matter how good a fake Australian accent I can do, I will not imitate [[Steve Irwin]] during Care of Magical Creatures class.
* The Ravenclaws are not "[[Dune|Mentats]] in training".
* [[wikipedia:Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab|Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab]] does not sell potions ingredients and I will not resell their products as "Veela Pheremones".
Line 221:
* That glowing green potion I mixed up does not re-animate the dead.
* I will stop pasting happy face stickers on Professor Lupin's office door.
* [[Oingo Boingo|"Dead Man's Party"]] is a kickass song but probably not appropriate for a Deathday celebration. Ditto "No One Lives Forever".
* Hermione, Luna and Ginny are not my [[Charlie's Angels|Angels]].
* [[Clarke's Third Law|Sufficently advanced technology]] is ''not'' indistinguishable from magic.
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