You Fight Like a Cow: Difference between revisions

[[File:YouFightLikeACow 8942.jpg|link=Monkey Island (series)|frame|How appropriate. [[Lame Comeback|You fight like... a guy... fighting... a guy that fights like a dairy farmer]]!]]

 

 

Cutting implements and [[Trash Talk|cutting remarks]], combined.

 

If an insult's delivered just before the killing stroke, see [[Pre-Mortem One-Liner]]. If a few moments later, see [[Bond One-Liner]].

See [[My Grandma Can Do Better Than You]] and [[My Dad Can Beat Up Your Dad]] for similar insults.

 

* The Duels in ''[[Revolutionary Girl Utena]]'' often contain some form of this; Utena's part, though, can be either participatory, or merely reactionary, depending on how invested she is at the moment... or how confused. (Utena, not the audience.) Theatrically, in a series where the difference between reality and reality-as-a-stage has blurred, the duels were depicted as cathartic. This is especially blatant in the final Nanami duel, as {{spoiler|both participants know Nanami hasn't a shot in hell of winning from the start and just needs to HIT someone.}}

** In the Utena [[Live Action Role Play]] ''Still Places'', the winner of a duel is partially determined by whose banter was more psychologically damaging to the opponent.

* ''[[Galaxy Quest]]'''s (mostly) fake fight in the airlock consists of trading insults ("Raving egomaniac!" "scene-stealing hack!") and (mostly) fake punches ("You used to pull your punches") while maneuvering into position to grab a [[Improvised Weapon|blunt object]]

* The beginning of the third ''[[The Librarian|Librarian]]'' movie, ''Curse of the Judas Chalice,'' has an excellent example of this, with Flynn and the ''villain du jour'' dueling on stairs while critiquing each other's technique.

* Plenty of this happens in martial arts spoof ''[[Tongan Ninja]]'', most notably when Action Fighter quips: "You fight like a baby... a ''[[Dead Baby Comedy|dead baby]]''!"

* In ''Kuffs'' during a standoff with some bad guys:

'''Kuffs:''' Well, now we know that he [the bad guy] can add, and he [indicates his partner] can subtract..." }}

* The duel between Mina and Dorian Grey in ''[[The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (film)|The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen]]'' is [[Better on DVD]] because A) the version in the deleted scenes lasts longer and B) the [[Double Entendre|double entendres]] are hilarious.

 

== Literature ==

{{quote|"I'm gonna slay you just like I did Logalog!"

"You can't kill me the way you killed Logalog. I'm facin' you, Fenno. You stabbed Logalog in the back!" }}

 

 

* A ''lot'' of characters in the ''[[Power Rangers]]'' franchise like to chat while they fight, but the undefeated masters of this has to be the [[Power Rangers Ninja Storm|Ninja Storm Rangers]] who sometimes layer jokes and quips so thick it's like Spider-Man times six.

* ''[[Kaamelott]]'''s weaponmaster does not hesitate to insult the king while sparring with him. Arthur is usually not amused, doesn't really see the point though the weaponmaster does try and get him to throw insults around. He finally gets his way... only for Arthur to say something which he finds [[Berserk Button|really, really offensive.]]

{{quote|'''Hoshi:''' I was hoping you'd put up a fight.

'''T'Pol:''' I'm surprised you're not exhausted from all the beds you've jumped into recently.

 

== Tabletop Games ==

** In the 4th edition, the Bard class is a master of this trope. And since [[Magical Incantation|their puns and insults are actually magical attacks]], it is possible for a Bard to insult someone to death. Not so [[Spoony Bard]] now, eh?

** This is very likely derived from some prestige classes in some third edition settings (like the musketeer class in D20 Past) who gain the ability to automatically confirm critical hits if their player can come up with a witty, relevant and previously unused remark (or a cheap pun, you know whatever) to go with the attack. Like stabbing a vampire and saying "Looks like the ''stakes'' were too high." (We're ignoring the fact that vampires cannot be critically hit.) See the ''[[The Order of the Stick]]'' reference below.

** Also somehow reversed by Vaarsuvius [http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0010.html putting a bunch of goblins to sleep] via his/her pre-fight speech.

* ''[[Antihero for Hire]]''

** Shadehawk's favorite weapons are his big mouth, [[Indy Ploy]] and [[BFG|Silver Arrow]], exactly in that order

* [[Dominic Deegan]]'s father is a master of this kind of thing—the family is famed for their horrible puns.

* ''[[The Adventures of Dr. McNinja]]'': Ninjas [http://drmcninja.com/archives/comic/4p8 seem to be subject to this], too.

* [http://darthsanddroids.net/episodes/0393.html Used by] ''[[Darths and Droids]]'', complete with ''Monkey Island''-referencing and linking to this trope in [[The Rant]].

* ''[[Cheshire Crossing]]''

** Jack and Hook:

{{quote|'''Hook:''' Nice [[Eyepatch of Power]]. You'd make a good pirate.

'''Jack:''' [[Lame Comeback|... Shut up]]! }}

* ''[[Girl Genius]]'' main [[Love Triangle]] [http://www.girlgeniusonline.com/comic.php?date=20100430 presents] a variation:

{{quote|"You fight like '''''ducks!'''''"}}

* ''[[Spacetrawler]]'', every single time Growp and Emily fight.

'''Emily:''' Your flesh hand must be the poetic one... ''[rips Growp's cyborg hand out of its socket]'' the bionic one's better at long division. }}

* In ''[[Seekers (webcomic)|Seekers]]'', Errol trash talks this way during the duels.

* ''[[One Piece: Grand Line 3 Point 5]]'' handles the first Luffy vs. Buggy fight like this, referencing [[Monkey Island]] in the process.

 

== Web Original ==

{{quote|'''Danny:''' Come on, Guys, cut me some slack! ''(pause)'' Hey! Another axe pun!}}

** They do intentionally bad quips a lot in this show. From "Shades of Grey," after the ghost dog bursts into the school cafeteria:

'''Sam:''' Bring some new jokes! }}

* Spoofed in ''Sev Trek: Puss in Boots'' when Captain Pinchard is fighting his [[Evil Twin]].

'''Shane:''' Fighting you ''is'' like standing still. }}

* In one episode of ''[[Street Fighter (animation)|Street Fighter]]'', Fei Long insults the crap out of Ken who replies "And you... You're a loser!"

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Well, you fight like a blade of grass!

[[Category:Insult Tropes]]

[[Category:Sword Fight]]