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A Song of Ice and Fire/Funny: Difference between revisions
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* Tyrion Lannister is practically a walking, drinking, wenching Crowning Moment of Funny.
** "Tyrion found it disheartening to realize so many strangers were eager to kill him. Perhaps this had not been such a clever plan after all."
{{quote|'''Barbarian''': How would you like to die, Tyrion son of Tywin?
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* Tyrion challenges Haldon to a cyvasse game, having lost several times already, and Haldon says that the day Tyrion beats him is the day turtles swim out his arse. Cut to after the game, when someone asks when Haldon is:
{{quote|He's taken to his bed, in some discomfort. There are turtles swimming out his arse.}}
** The only thing that makes that sweeter, is that it's implied Tyrion was deliberately giving him false confidence, since Tyrion offers to bet secrets right before the game.
* The out of nowhere [[Shout-Out]] to ''[[Monty Python and
* Jaime surprises Jonos Bracken in the middle of sex, and one of the darkest fantasy series ever briefly turns into a classical French farce. "And how fares your lady wife?"
** Even funnier is Jaime's [[Deadpan Snarker|deadpan snark]] response to Bracken's greeting.
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'''Jaime:''' Killed some crossbowmen. }}
** Later on during their journey, there's another double one when the party's attacked by outlaw archers. Jaime rides straight at them to scatter them and is halfway there before it occurs to him that "the wench had better follow before they realise they're being charged by an unarmed man in chains".
* When Ser Corliss Penny wonders aloud whether an entire army has ever frozen to death in a winter storm, it only serves to make the Northmen present burst out in laughter.
{{quote|'''Big Bucket Will''': "Up in the hills we say that autumn kisses you, but winter fucks you hard. This is only autumn's kiss."}}
* Hodor often livens up Bran chapters, aided by Martin's narration. Standouts include the line " 'Hodor', Hodor said doubtfully" and when Bran tells him to stop hodoring.
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'''[[Blood Knight|Jaime Lannister]]:''' [[Shut Up, Kirk|No?]] Then surely it was to have your pleasure of me? They say widows grow [[Close to Home|weary of their empty beds.]] We of the [[Knight in Shining Armor|Kingsguard]] [[Celibate Hero|vow never to wed]], but I suppose I could still service you if that's what you need. Pour us some of that wine and slip out of that gown and we'll see if I'm still up to it. }}
* At the end of ''A Clash of Kings'', the victors/survivors of the Battle of the Blackwater are being honored, the Lannisters and the court are in their finery, and Tywin enters in all his magnificence to greet Joffrey... and then his horse shits on the carpet in front of Joffrey and Joffrey has to step around it to greet him. The spirit of the event was kind of ruined there.
** Even better, while the victors were being rewarded and the captives were punished or forced to bend the knee, Joffrey cuts himself on the Iron Throne and runs crying out of the throne room. Tywin takes over as if nothing had happened.
** In ''A Storm of Swords'', Joffrey calls Lord Tywin a coward. Tywin and Kevan send him to bed without any supper, [[Refuge in Audacity|and drug him so he will sleep and not disturb them.]]
* Tyrion, bidding on himself, when he is being auctioned off, as a slave:
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{{quote|'''Pyp:''' The night is dark and full of turnips. Let us pray for venison, my children, with some onions and a bit of tasty gravy.}}
* During a Clash of Kings, Jojen has a prophetic dream about Winterfell flooded by the sea and several of its inhabitants drowning, a metaphor for {{spoiler|the Ironborn invading and sacking it.}} [[Cassandra Truth|Only one guard believes it]], and well...
{{quote|Alebelly was the only one who paid the warning any heed. He went to talk to Jojen himself, and afterward [[Literal
* Patchface's ramblings about life underwater suddenly become much funnier when you remember a famous song...
{{quote|''Under the sea''
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'''Lommy:''' What if the wolves come?
'''Arya:''' Yield. }}
* In ''A Feast For Crows'', Jaime attempts to follow in his father's footsteps, and intimidate Edmure Tully by having a minstrel play "The Rains of Castamere". Edmure reacts appropriately (Jaime actually thinks it's an over-reaction), but rather than being spooked by the song, which is usually the case, Edmure demonstrates [[Skewed Priorities]], as his reaction is because the minstrel Jaime had play it once wrote a derisive song about Edmure being unable to [[The Loins Sleep Tonight|get it up]].
** There's also [[Dramatic Irony]] value in that the audience knows that the minstrel in question, Tom O'Sevens, belongs to a group of outlaws who are alies of the Tullys/Starks and hate the Lannisters, and it's implied from some of Tom's comments that Jaime just moved up his position on the "going to get hanged" list.
* While Theon's chapters in ''A Dance With Dragons'' aren't exactly a laugh riot, there's a funny line in the middle of one of the chapters, where he's thinking about [[Camp Follower|camp followers]] [[Unusual Euphemism|euphemistically]] called "washerwomen". "... Some of them even did some washing."
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{{quote|"We shall strive to make up in drunkenness what we lack in oarsmen. I for one am equal to the task."}}
* The whole concept of Skagos is kind of funny. Unicorns are typically associated with the most idealistic of fantasy, which makes it amusing (and typical of the series) that the location where unicorns are found is a [[Place Worse Than Death]] the thought of which scares even jaded Westerosi. Also, the few details about unicorns shown so far, suggest they [[Killer Rabbit|aren't the friendliest of creatures]].
** made even funnier with the Speculation that Ned's mother was maybe from there
* Also from ''A Dance with Dragons'', Wyman Manderly's denies having ordered the murder of Little Walder Frey and retorts to his accuser, also a Frey:
{{quote|"Though mayhaps this was a blessing. Had he lived he would have grown up to be a Frey."}}
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* Stannis' put down to Jon in ''A Dance With Dragons''- “You haggle like a crone with a codfish, Lord Snow. Did Ned Stark father you on some fishwife?”
* Rather dark humour, but just after Jon executes Janos Slynt, Olaf asks if he can have Slynt's boots.
* Roose Bolton's most lighthearted line:
{{quote|"I have become oddly fond of my fat little wife."}}
* The entirety of Sansa's dinner with Margaery and her family members, where Margaery and her grandmother try to find out what Joffrey is really like, all while Butterbumps, the Tyrell family's fool sings "The Bear and the Maiden Fair" at increasingly ridiculous volumes.
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* During their negotiations, Renly reaches inside his coat. Stannis and everyone around him thinks that he's pulling a weapon... he has a peach, which he offers to Stannis. Made even funnier after {{spoiler|Renly's death}}, when Stannis is still trying to figure out what the peach represented.
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