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{{trope}}
[[File:Dwarfbread.jpg|link=Discworld
The hero is walking away from his triumphant victory at the local grocer with his spoils and is attacked. He has no weapon to defend himself with, but fortunately he just bought some [[ISO Standard Urban Groceries]], so he improvises and pulls out his trusty baguette to demonstrate that pain is not just the French word for bread.
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After all, bread is the [[Simple Staff|staff]] of life.
A particular implementation of [[Nerf Arm]]. A [[Sub
{{examples|Examples}}▼
== Comic Books ==
* In the comic book version of ''[[The Tick (
* ''[[The Boys]]'' is not a series where you would expect this trope to be deployed, but during The Frenchman's reminisces, we get Le Saintes Des Haw-Haw, where Frenchmen settle their differences by jousting on Bicycles, using baguettes as lances. Frenchie claims that his father was killed by his childhood enemy thrusting a rock-hard stale croissant into the front wheel of the bicycle, which (if true) would count as de-nerfing this trope. Then again, he is just plain crazy (as well as [[Ax Crazy]])...
== Comic Strips ==
* In ''[[
* In ''[[
* In a ''[[Garfield (Comic Strip)|Garfield]]'' strip from 1980, Garfield enjoys "Playtime" with various foods. The second panel is him offering to "... take that machine gun nest out with my trusty bazooka here." The bazooka in question is a baguette.
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== Films -- Live-Action ==
* In ''[[Clerks]]'', Dante and Randal have a knock-down drag-out in the Quick Stop, during which Randal whacks Dante across the face with a loaf of bread.
* There's a brief Baquette duel in the [[
* In ''[[Herbie Goes to Monte Carlo]]'', there is a scene where Herbie is waiting at a stoplight at an intersection when a truck driver gets a French woman carrying some groceries angry at him. She proceeds to pound on the side of the truck with a baguette, causing no obvious damage to bread or to the truck. It does result in the Love Bug getting dirty.
* In ''Cheech and Chong's the Corsican Brothers'' (don't worry if you never heard of it), Chong's character discovers the weapon potential of day-old french loaves.
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== Literature ==
* In the ''[[
* In [[Tamora Pierce]]'s [[Tortall Universe|Tortall]] novel ''Squire'', Kel and company batter Neal with baguette-type loaves of bread because he won't shut up about how hot the queen is (and is going into a lengthy quote on the subject of hot queens).
== Live-Action TV ==
* ''[[
* ''[[Dead Ringers (TV series)|Dead Ringers]]'': "Your bakery products are weak, old man!"
* In ''[[Heroes (TV series)|Heroes]]'', Hiro tries to defend himself against his katana-wielding father with a baguette. It works about as well as you'd expect.
* In one episode of ''[[
* ''[[
{{quote|
'''Eliot:''' I dunno, maybe. }}
* ''[[
* ''[[Almost Live]]''
** Used in an episode of ''Mind Your Manners with Billy Quan''.
** Also a baguette [[No
== Music ==
* "Ernie (The Fastest Milkman in the West)" by [[
== Video Games ==
* The classic Lucas Arts point and click adventure game ''[[Zak McKracken and
* Kass Basher (formerly titled "Whack-A-Kass"), a ''[[
* [[Massively Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game|MMORPG]] ''[[
* In ''Kingdom o' Magic'', in order to depose the High Steward of Minar Tragedy you have to get a sword baked into a baguette so you can get it past the guards.
* Loaves of bread are available as weapons in ''[[
* In ''[[Tibia]]'', there is a club weapon called "Stale Bread of Ancientness". You guessed it, it's a baguette.
* In one of the competitions between Hu Delta Phart and Getta Loda Yu in the third game of ''[[The Spellcasting Series]]'', you win a fight by casting a spell turning the lead Yu's weapon from a lead pipe into a loaf of bread (and a modified version of the spell turning the head Phart's weapon from a banana into a sword).
* Should you eat the Stale Baguette in ''[[
* [[Dub Name Change|Mimi Baker/Mimmy Bread]] from ''[[
== Web Animation ==
* In the Flash ''[[
== Web Comics ==
* ''[[
* ''[[
== Web Original ==
* The French amateur series ''[[
* In ''[[Le Donjon De Naheulbeuk]]'', the Ranger inadvertently attacks a weremole with a tuna sandwich. {{spoiler|It ends badly for him.}}
* Benzaie of ''[[That Guy With
== Western Animation ==
* In one episode of ''[[
* In an episode of ''[[Codename
* ''[[
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{{reflist}}
[[Category:Improvised
[[Category:Food Tropes]]
[[Category:Combat Tropes]]
[[Category:Weapons and Wielding Tropes]]
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