Conspiracy Theorist/Quotes: Difference between revisions
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{{quote|''"Deb, this is it! This time I stumbled across something that is bigger than anything you could possibly imagine. A threat to the entire human race's existence. Deb, nothing can prepare the world for this. This is the biggest story in the history of humanity ever! Ever, Deb. How I found this out I can't say, but I'm risking my life to tell the world this. Are you prepared for this? People of Los Angeles, [[Vampire|vampires]] walk among us. Hear me out, Deb. Vampires are among us and have been since the dawn of time. And Los Angeles... Well, there's more vampires per person here than anywhere else in the world. People are killed by vampires all the time, but [[Written by the Winners|their secret vampire society covers it up]]. Who blew up that warehouse in Santa Monica? Vampires! What happened to the crew of the Elizabeth Dane? Vampires! Want to know what happened to that sarcophagus that disappeared? Vampires took it. The prince of vampires to be more specific. He wants to use it against a league of other vampires that have been trying to get a foothold in our city. And get this! There could be an even older vampire in the sarcophagus. An ancient super-vampire! It's the truth, Deb. [[The Undead]] are all around us. We need to rise up and destroy our evil vampire overlords before it's too late!"''|'''Gomez''', ''[[Show Within a Show|Deb of Night]]'', ''[[Vampire: The Masquerade Bloodlines]]''. {{spoiler|The last "theory" is [[Cassandra Truth|pretty much a summary of the entire game]].}}}}
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{{quote|''There are, of course, [[Shown Their Work|good conspiracy analysts]] and [[Did Not Do the Research|bad conspiracy analysts]], just as there are good and bad historians or practitioners of any discipline. The bad conspiracy analyst tends to make two kinds of mistakes, which indeed leave him open to the Establishment charge of "paranoia." First, [[You Fail Logic Forever|he stops with the cui bono]]; if measure A benefits X and Y, he simply concludes that therefore X and Y were responsible. He fails to realize that this is just a hypothesis, and must be verified by finding out whether or not X and Y really did so. (Perhaps the wackiest example of this was the British journalist Douglas Reed who, seeing that the result of Hitler's policies was the destruction of Germany, concluded, without further evidence, that therefore Hitler was a conscious agent of external forces who deliberately set out to ruin Germany.) Secondly, the bad conspiracy analyst seems to have a compulsion to wrap up all the conspiracies, all the bad guy power blocs, into one giant conspiracy. Instead of seeing that there are several power blocs trying to gain control of [[The Government|government]], sometimes in conflict and sometimes in alliance, he has to assume - again without evidence - that a small group of men controls them all, and only seems to send them into conflict.''|'''Murray N. Rothbard''' "[http://mises.org/daily/2809 The Conspiracy Theory of History Revisited"]}}
{{quote|'''[[Torture Technician]]''': "You stole files from our computer. Just tell me what you've learned."
'''[[The Question]]''': "Topically applied fluoride doesn't prevent tooth decay. It does render teeth detectable by [[Spy Satellite]]!"
'''Torture Technician''': "Tell me what you know!"
'''The Question''': "[[What the Heck Is An Aglet?|The plastic tips at the ends of shoelaces are called aglets]]. Their true purpose is '''sinister'''."<br />
'''Torture Technician''': "Tell me what you know!"<br />
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{{quote|'''Zeke''': "Look, I'm being serious man, now DARPA is the mother-load of black-ops crap. If she's in with those clowns, you better watch out, son."
'''Cole''': "Yeah, yeah, yeah, and Santa Claus shot J.F.K, now where are those drinks?"|''[[Infamous (video game series)|In Famous]]''}}
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