Cool Boat/Real Life: Difference between revisions

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{{trope}}
== When men and women sailed the seas, using literal sails, there was still cool. These are examples of [[PunA Worldwide Punomenon|Epic Sails]]... ==
* [[Horny Vikings|Viking]] Longships, capable of both crossing the ocean and sailing up rivers, carrying [[Blood Knight|bloodthirsty pillagers]], was a terrifying sight for European villages and cities for 200 years. Norsemen could also build one on a spot. With an axe.
* [[wikipedia:Turtle ship|The Korean Turtle Ship]]. Its a warship with ''spikes'' on the top of it. How [[Awesome Yet Practical|awesome]] is that?
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* The ''[http://img.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2007/05_02/cuttysarkG2105_468x372.jpg Cutty Sark]'', a tea clipper so fast it remained profitable to run well into the age of steam-powered boats.
* The [[wikipedia:SMS Seeadler (Windjammer)|Seeadler]] ought to qualify. I mean seriously, a sailing warship in ''1916''?
* There are still cool sailboats in the modern world; witness the [https://web.archive.org/web/20110629154056/http://www.symaltesefalcon.com/about.asp Maltese Falcon]. Also, it has a vintage Bentley as a coffee table decoration.
* Don't forget the [[wikipedia:America (yacht)|America]], a schooner so fast that after starting a 53 mile race with a fouled anchor, she won the race by ''18 minutes''. For the non sailing types, that's so far ahead of the pack that when the Queen of England asked who was in second place, the response was "There is no second, Your Majesty"
 
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* The ''50 Let Pobedy'' and the other ships of the nuclear-powered Russian ''Arktika'' class icebreaker are the red kings of the Arctic Ocean.
** Hey hey hey. If you're looking for red kings, I got some red-hulled badasses for you. USCGC ''Polar Sea'' and ''Polar Star'' are a bit older than the ''50 Let'', falling apart with age, but they can break just as much ice. Or could, y'know, if they weren't falling apart.
* The research vessel ''[https://web.archive.org/web/20130725034047/http://www.jamstec.go.jp/chikyu/eng/CHIKYU/tour.html Chikyu Hakken]'' - a Japanese geological research vessel that can drill ''6000-metre-deep holes in the ocean floor''.
* The new British Type 45 ''Daring''-class destroyers, with the radar cross-section of a fishing trawler. Even if it doesn't have all the weapons it can carry fitted. [["Join the Army," They Said|Began appearing in the recruitment ads even before the first one was commissioned]].
* The Russian nuclear-powered "''Kirov''" class [https://web.archive.org/web/20010823152817/http://www.aeronautics.ru/archive/fleet/russian/1144.htm heavy cruisers]. 20 anti-shipping missiles, four different kinds of surface-to-air missiles (up to 476 rounds can be carried, 340 ready to fire at any one time), 10 torpedo tubes, [[Gatling Good|CIWS systems]] and a rapid-firing 130mm twin cannon. Bigger than some light aircraft carriers. A living example of [[More Dakka]]. She also has a SIGINT profile compared a Disney-style Christmas Tree with all candles blazing and all mechanical gnomes singing Jingle Bells at maximum volume. In Russian, of course.
* The ''Iowa'' class battleships. That is all.
** To clarify, and distinguish this example from the previous mention of the ''Iowa'' Class, in 1984 Ronald Reagan was signifigantly increasing the size of the US Navy. One target of this increase were the four ''Iowa'' Class Battleships, which had all been mothballed since the New Jersey provided fire support during the Vietnam War. The ships were put through an extensive refit, completly gutting the old systems and modernizing the ships. After the refit, the Battleships were arguably the best warships the world has ever, and ever will, see, with the old armament of 16" and 5" guns being supplemented by Tomahawk and Harpoon missiles, Phalanx cannons, and a helipad complete with a Sea Sprite ASW helicopter.
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== When you are saving the whales... ==
* It definitely helps to have [https://web.archive.org/web/20091023033620/http://www.seashepherd.org/news-and-media/news-091020-1.html a boat that you'd expect Batman to have.]
** [http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2010/01/08/2787921.htm Until it got sunk].
** Not to mention now forever stuck in our memories with [[Never Live It Down|a bad paintjob,and being called the Bat-mobile]].
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* She was known as the [[wikipedia:Earthrace|Earthrace]],Had a MUCH cooler paintjob and circumnavigated the world in 61 days back in 2008.This WAS before her owner had a [[Leeroy Jenkins]] moment,and joined a certain [[Animal Wrongs Group]].
* Try the (unfortunately Canceled) [[wikipedia:HMCS Bras d'Or (FHE 400)|HMCS Bras d'Or (FHE 400)]]. This military hydrofoil was clocked at over 63 knots (117 km/h!! or 72 mph!!) making it possibly the fastest warship ever built!
 
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Go back on board the [[Cool Boat]]. Make sure you have your seasickness pills...
 
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[[Category:Cool Boat]]
[[Category:Real Life]]