Equal and Opposite Attraction

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Sometime after the confrontation with Cosmo Entelecheia and successfully locating his parents, Negi Springfield decides that he needs some time away from Mahora to properly plan his life out, freed as he is from the need to worry about the fates of his family and students. Thus, he leaves in the middle of the night, accompanied only by Chamo, for a new school in an entirely different part of Japan. Here, he hopes to settle down for a normal year of teaching to think things through.

There's just one problem:

He's gone to Uminari City, Three very powerful mages are part of his new class, and the TSAB is finally figuring out that maybe Nanoha and Hayate aren't the only mages of note on the planet.

What follows is a saga of equal parts sugary, fluffy goodness, mind-rape, and ensuing hilarity. All the while, a new enemy slowly encroaches on the city, threatening both Negi and his students. Considering that three of his charges include Nanoha, Fate, and Hayate, however, things are going to get very sticky, very quickly.

The story can be read here.

Tropes used in Equal and Opposite Attraction include:

• Accidental Pervert: Negi continues this fine tradition, much to his chagrin.
• Accidental Public Confession: Chamo, excited to see Konoka, starts talking in front of Amy...who is unaware that Negi is a mage, that Kamo can talk, and that there is a mage population on Earth. Seconds later, Asuna jumps through the window in full armor, swinging a sword around and demanding to know where Negi is.
• Adaptational Badass: In this story, Yukihiro Ayaka has a combat-oriented artifact and is being trained by Setsuna (as opposed to being Locked Out of the Loop or having a useful but noncombat oriented artifact).
• The Aloner: Negi isn't aware of the other mages in town, and unlike in Mahora, he manages to keep the fact that he uses magic (mostly) secret; as such, the local mages have no reason to inform him of anything. And since the enemy/enemies have yet to reveal themselves, he can't just call Ala Alba over for the weekend to quickly stomp them (since all the other members of Ala Alba are still in school, and can't afford to camp out in Uminari City indefinitely). As far as he knows, he is The Only One that can fend off the mysterious attackers hiding within the city. This is what leads to him resuming his training, and is why he continues it despite the increasingly dangerous weather conditions.
• Alien Non-Interference Clause: A "Prime Directive" is mentioned, and since the author has "Jean-Lauc Picard" hanging about in TSAB service, one may reasonably assume that the Directive is this trope.
• Alternate Timeline: This story takes place in a world where Negi found his parents, who are happily living in Ostia (as opposed to finding out that his father Nagi was serving as the latest body for the Lifemaker), and where Negi never stopped teaching.
• And Now for Something Completely Different: In a meta example, someone else ghostwrites Chapter 13 as a part of the All Purpose Negima Fanfiction Thread's shennanigans.
• Ascended Extra: After being shadowed and downplayed in A's, Alyssa and Suzuka appear to have a much larger role in the story.
• Big Damn Heroes: Coupled with a rousing Badass Boast and ETERNAL NEGI FEVER.
• Badass Adorable: Negi is able to destroy a small, fabricated dimension of darkness, yet Lindy, Arf, and Nanoha still succumb to his shota-cuteness.
• Badass Boast: Negi, during his rescue of Hayate.

Negi: I am Negi Springfield, offspring of the Thousand Master and the Princess of Ostia. I have been trained by the greatest masters of combat and magic, and have never failed to impress them. I have faced demons, madmen, cyborgs, and gods themselves, all for the sake of others. I have traveled the world in search of one man thought dead. And I found him. You think the darkness scares me? You think I am just some child? You think I would back away from anyone who would hurt my students? JUST WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM?

• • Later, Nanoha makes one against Negi:

"I have fought demons, monsters, robots, and summons, I have faced down the darkest depths and rescued my precious ones from its grasp. There is no obstacle I cannot surpass, no foe I that can outrun my shot. I am Takamachi Nanoha, AND I AM NOT A PERVERT!"

• • • Damn you, puberty!
• Non Sequitur Scene: Arf ends up eating some of Chamo's magic chocolates. Then she proceeds to act like a drugged-out squirrel and dry hump Zafira. Apart from one aside mention in the next chapter, the incident and the chocolates are never mentioned again. Thank God.
• Broken Masquerade: Originally, the TSAB did not know about Earth's mage population. Now they do.
• Call Back: Asuna uses the example of Negi vanishing her bear panties to justify the publishing of a pamphlet about getting Clothing Damage during mage fights.
• The Cameo: The girls of Tenchi Muyo! all work as maids in Alyssa's employ.
  • Apparently Lindy was in basic training with Captain Picard
• The Cavalry Arrives Late: Negi, having just saved Hayate from the mysterious darkness wielding opponents, is trying to figure out how to transport her back home when Zafira arrives.
• Clothing Damage: Subverted. Nanoha and company's school uniforms have such long skirts that Negi can't blow them up with a sneeze. Lampshaded in a later chapter when Negi finds that his students have made a pamphlet explaining all the ways a mage can 'expose' you.
• Comedic Sociopathy: Negi very nearly found himself on the receiving end of some after Nanoha found out that he had collapsed with a fever inside his locked apartment.

Nanoha: "Hang on, Negi-sensei. You won't be alone anymore. Divine Bus-" Amy: "Nanoha-chan, what do you think you're doing?"

• The Comically Serious: Signum
• Continuity Nod: During one of the many lampshade hangings of Nanoha's extensive usage of Defeat Means Friendship, Allysa points out Nanoha has beaten up her, Fate, the Wolkenritter, and Hayate prior to befriending them.
  • Shamal also has one, saying that her magic won't make Hayate walk, only her courage will. Negi promptly sneezes in response.
• Covert Pervert: Due to some mixed-up feelings about Negi, Nanoha has several fantasies about the two of them being a 'couple.'
• Crazy Prepared: The Ala Alba didn't seem to have much faith that Negi could keep his secret safe, so the Library Club published a series of pamphlets. Their topics range from dark magic possession and talking familiars to Pactio makeout tips and the risk of getting stripped naked while in battle.
• Crossover: With Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha, naturally.
  • Apparently Chao and Hakase helped Ryou Shirogane with the Mew Project.
  • And Joshua likes drinking coffee with Fate.
• Crossover Ship: Nanoha seems to be slowly falling for Negi.
• Deadpan Snarker: Signum. She lampshades everyone's actions with the same direct language she uses in the heat of combat, and it's one of the funniest parts of the story.
• Defeat Means Friendship: Alyssa calls Nanoha out on this when Nanoha notes that Negi "looks lonely", but it was Played for Laughs.
• Distress Call: The plot of Chapter 7.
• Dynamic Entry: Nanoha attempts to use Raising Heart to bust Negi's apartment door down. Asuna has TWO: One when she kicked her door down, and another when she flies in through Fate's window. Neither are met with approval.
• Face Palm: Lindy's favorite reaction to Fate-chan and Arf's antics.
• Fantastic Drug: The magic chocolates.
• Five-Man Band: The girls who go to Uminari to help Negi:
  • The Hero: Asuna,
  • The Lancer: Ayaka
  • The Smart Guy: Nodoka, relatively speaking
  • The Big Guy: Setsuna
  • The Chick: Konoka
• Follow the Leader: Zephyr-Fiction, the author, freely admits that this story is based off of Shadow Crystal Mage's similar fic Overlords and Overkill. However, this is Played With because he and Zephyr not only have routine correspondence about their stories, but Mage has also freely accepted the fact that he inspired Zephyr in the first place.
• Friend to All Children: Zafira, as usual. Word of God says this was the reason why he didn't start a fight with Negi back in Chapter 7
• Furo Scene: Chapter 9 has Negi bonding with Hayate, Signum, and Vita in the bathtub, much to his embarrassment.
• Genre Savvy: Lampshaded. Chamo is fully aware that trouble will follow Negi wherever he goes. He also knows that at the first sign of trouble, Negi will wear himself to the bone with extra training.
  • Nagi is aware that Jack Rakan will be far more effective than the group of palace guards Arika wanted to send to help protect Negi.
• Gondor Calls for Aid:
  • At the end of Chapter 6, Hayate, thoroughly mind raped and isolated in a magically sealed dimension, makes a desperate telepathic plea for help. Negi's listening, and his answer does not disappoint.
  • In Chapter 12, Asuna, Konoka, Nodoka, Setsuna and Ayaka travel to Uminari to help Negi when over-training puts him out of commission.
• Heroic BSOD: Asuna. The only difference is that she's not happy about Negi walking out on her and the class.
• Heroic RROD: Negi's morning training in dangerous conditions catches up to him, and nearly results in him succumbing to Magia Erebea.
• Heroic Comedic Sociopath: Nanoha's friends seem to think she's one.

Alyssa: Oh no you don't. Nanoha: I don't what? Alyssa: You are not blowing him up just to make friends with him. Nanoha: I, I don't do that!

• High-Speed Missile Dodge: Used by Setsuna during a mock battle.
• Idiot Ball: Negi apparently packed it away when he moved out of Asuna's room. What do you do when an unknown enemy is preying on your students and mind-raping them beyond belief? Nearly kill yourself training solo in order to protect them.
• I Work Alone: Negi ditched all his allies and is working alone because he doesn't want to bother them. He's also worried that if he lets them know where he is, all of 3-A will come harass him again.
• Kansas City Shuffle: Meta-version. In one early chapter, we all think Negi's going to sneeze and blow Nanoha and company's skirts up, as usual. Instead, he propels himself into the air and faceplants onto the floor behind him.
• Lampshade Hanging: Several regarding Nanoha's past use of Defeat Means Friendship.

Nanoha: W-why does everyone think I beat up my friends all the time?

• Large Ham: Asuna runs around with her artifact out, screaming about how she's going to handle Negi. Surpsingly, Konoka gets in on the act in Chapter 17.
• Magic A Is Magic A: Extensive detail is given to Shamal's medical magic, along with a good explanation as to why she can't just heal Hayate's legs. Apparently, because her leg muscles haven't been used at ALL, they need to heal naturally.
• Meaningful Name: The name of the most feared and bloodthirsty admiral in the TSAB apparently means "Blood Fist" in German, or Ancient Belkan, if you want to be exact.
• Mind Rape: Poor, poor Arf and Hayate. This seems to be the standard modus operandi of the bad guys.
  • They also try it on Chamo and Negi, but both of them see through it almost immediately.
• Moment Killer: Nagi interrupts his OWN bout of love-making to call Jack, and Arika weaponized the trope in the form of a Rakan construct that punches Kurt in the face every time he tries to jerk off.
• Mood Whiplash:
  • Chapter 4.
  • Chapter 6 begins with a description of Hayate making breakfast for her knights, in which Hilarity Ensues when she "punishes" Vita. It ends with Hayate being Mind Raped into thinking her knights are dead and the city is destroyed. Also contains a Shout-Out to The Lion King.
• Mutual Masquerade: In the beginning, the TSAB go out of their way to conceal their traces while trying to study Earth. In contrast, the Earth mages are so good at covering their tracks that the TSAB don't even know they're there. This gets broken, first by Chamo and Arf, and later by some of the Ala Alba girls.
• Not So Stoic: Signum keeps herself awake all night while Hayate recovers from her Mind Rape.
• Oh Crap, There Are Fanfics of Us: Lampshaded by Chisame in an Omake, after reading a chat that insinuates Chisame X Twilight Sparkle.
• Oh, No, Not Again: Negi's reaction to learning that there are three mages in his new class.
• The Only One: Negi thinks he's The Only One who can handle whatever attacked Hayate, nevermind that Ala Alba would jump through hoops blindfolded to help him out if he needed it.
• Only Sane Man: Lindy. She's the only one shown not to descend into the main cast's usual wacky antics.
• Out-of-Character Moment: Nanoha comes off as much more uncertain at the prospect of a potential fight than she ever was in the original series.
• Pettanko: Vita, as usual. Fate counts as well, but only because of her age.
• Put on a Bus: Chrono and Yunno are unceremoniously shipped out to New York City in order to study Earth mages. To date, they've been mentioned only three times.
• Putting a Hand Over His Mouth: Nodoka uses this to stop Konoka from explaining about Pactios.
• Secret Keeper: Arf acted as this to Chamo regarding Negi's mage status, Chamo being capable of speech, and of the existence of mages on Earth, until Chamo finally blew his cover.
• Shout-Out:
  • Chapter 6, Hayate has just been mind raped into seeing everything she loves die. Her cries for help are the same ones Simba from The Lion King shout, word-for-word, after Mufasa dies.
  • A far less depressing one happens in the next chapter when Negi channels his inner Kamina during the aforementioned Big Damn Heroes moment
• Sneeze Cut: Used almost as commonly as Gondor Calls for Aid. To list several:
  • One breaks the fourth wall when Alyssa lampshades the absurdity of having a ten-year-old boy teaching school. This results in Ken Akamatsu having to stall the next release of the manga.
  • When Shamal says that Hayate's courage is stronger than her magic, Negi sneezes, and Ayaka implies that Zazie sneezed as well.
• Stealth Hi Bye: Albireo does this to Negi over his phone when the group decides to sit down for some "Albiero Fried Chicken"
• Taken for Granite: When the villains attempt to Mind Rape Negi, they show him everyone he knows having been petrified.
• Team Dad: Chamo for Negi. Surprisingly, he's the lone voice of reason, trying to talk the poor kid out of exhausting himself trying to protect everyone. Again...
• Team Mom: Lindy effectively turns Negi into her surrogate son while Chrono is off hunting mages in America.
  • Ayaka claims she's one as well, but it has yet to be proven. Meanwhile, Shamal is slowly improving her cooking skills, and Signum's cover story introduces her as one for the rest of the knights.
• "The Reason You Suck" Speech: Yue's speech to Negi drips of this.
• Training from Hell: Negi does it again. It comes to bite him in the ass. Hard.
• Warrior Therapist: Signum, surprisingly. She delivers a good You Are Better Than You Think You Are speech to Hayate, the morning after her Mind Rape. While she doesn't do this DURING the battle, her reputation AS a warrior certainly gives her the title.
• What Is This Thing You Call Love?: Nanoha seems to be having some problems with this.
• What Could Have Been: An In-universe example: Chamo's original plan for revealing Earth magic to the TSAB involved bringing everyone to Mahorafest. Any fan of Mahou Sensei Negima knows that would have been a recipe for disaster.
• What the Hell, Hero?: Yue calls Negi out at length for abandoning 3-A.
• The World Is Just Awesome: The view of Earth in Chapter 19.
• You Are Not Alone: It's officially the author's favorite trope. Invoked verbatim by Signum to Hayate after her Mind Rape and by Negi when he rescues her from said Mind Rape.