View source for How to Become a Love Interest

{{trope}}
''Want to have your dream girl or guy swoon over you? It's easy! Just: (select your gender)''

'''Females:'''
# Be the [[First Girl Wins|first one]] at the entrance when he comes in. (If someone else got there first, you can always [[Last Girl Wins|try waiting til the end]].)
# [[Alias (TV)|Dye]] your hair [[Heroes Want Redheads|red]].
# If he's an American, become a [[All Guys Want Cheerleaders|cheerleader]].
# Don't settle for a simple greeting; make your first meeting with him [[Meet Cute|extremely convoluted or sappy]] to prove that only fate could have thrown you two together. The [[Crash Into Hello]] meeting is especially popular.
# Even better, leave the bathroom door open for him to walk inside and see you [[Naked First Impression]]. Not only does it leave a lasting impression, it also gives you an excuse to give him a [[Megaton Punch]] (see below).
# [[Love At First Punch|Sucker punch]] him in the face or [[Groin Attack]].
# Act horrified at the thought that you could ever be in love with him and be a [[Tsundere|cranky, volatile person]] around him. Remember, no hero likes a [[Clingy Jealous Girl]] or [[Shrinking Violet|shy, blushing person]] with "I'M SOOOO IN LOVE" stamped on her forehead. As insurance, be the first to beat the crap of out of him for doing something that can be regarded as even slightly perverted.
# Make absolutely sure that you give each other your [[First Kiss]]. [[Indirect Kiss|Sharing straws]] is acceptable; the rule of thumb here is if it can give mono, it probably counts.
# Tell him you [[Childhood Marriage Promise|promised to marry him]] when you were five. This always, always, ''always'' works, just so long as he doesn't find out you're lying or remember that when he was five, he was [[Girls Have Cooties|afraid of girls]]. If he does, however, you [[Unlucky Childhood Friend|instantly lose it all]].
# If he's a manly man with rippling biceps, become the [[Distressed Damsel]] to be [[Rescue Romance|swept up]] into his arms.
# Failing that, be a [[Doom Magnet]], and find a man who is equally one himself. You'll [[Battle Couple|bond together for safety alone]], even if you don't consider him your truest love. [[Be a Whore To Get Your Man|Promising him sex]] will help ensure that he [[Closed Circle|doesn't try to leave]], [[Death By Pragmatism|which would only get him killed anyway]]. Just don't have ''[[Death By Sex|too much]]'' sex.
# Somehow bribe the gods into [[Cleaning Up Romantic Loose Ends|removing all competition]], leaving you as their sole choice.
# [[Beautiful All Along|Get contacts and let your hair down]].
# [[Meganekko|Get glasses]].
# ... and [[Hot Librarian|develop a love for books and other intellectual pursuits]].
# Get a [[Hot Scientist|degree in chemistry]].
# [[Gamer Chick|Get really good at video games]], tabletop games, or whatever it is the geek is into.
# [[Hot Amazon|Work out your womanly figure and take fighting classes]].
# ...or [[No Guy Wants an Amazon|stay delicate with no muscles]] if he's got an ego stake in fighting.
# [[Disabled Love Interest|Get a not-too-crippling disability]]. If you don't like the idea of permanently hurting yourself, [[Ill Girl|try getting a not-too-disfiguring and non-contagious disease]]. Nothing invokes those chivalrous instincts like a cough in the right moment. Watch out, though: if you're too good at, you may end up [[Too Good for This Sinful Earth|dying in the end]].
# And make sure you ''never'' come off as [[No Guy Wants to Be Chased|being overly eager or aggressive]].
# Offer to [[Hands On Approach|teach him how to dance]].
# ...or [[Duet Bonding|play a piano duet together]].
# [[Love At First Note|Sing]].
# Secretly be male. A [[Wholesome Crossdresser]] never fails to get some important guys after shim.
# Of course [[Sweet On Polly Oliver|dressing like a man]] works well too.
# If all else fails, [[Rape Is Love|force yourself]] onto him. It'll give you something to [[Rape Is Ok When It Is Female On Male|laugh about]] afterwards! {{color|red|'''Warning:''' If you're in real life, doing this will at least screw up your karma and at most get you a life sentence or on-site death.}}
# ...this may sound outrageous but.....if he happens to be [[Soul Brotha|black]], [[Where Da White Women At|be white. Just...be white]] Seriously, this works way more often than it sounds.
** If he's anything else, [[Ambiguously Brown]] will usually work. Bonus points if you're [[Pocahontas|a "savage"]].
# Your [[Designated Love Interest|main competition]] isn't allowed to admit her feelings until just before the end credits. Therefore, admit yours much sooner and attempt to gather enough audience sympathy make the confession stick.
** Do ''not'', however, proclaim love for someone within minutes of meeting them. Wait long enough to make everyone believe you took the time to actually get to know the person you claim to be in love with.
# [[Samus Is a Girl|Conceal your gender and kick some serious ass right in front of him]]. Alternatively, help him to deal with a bunch of [[Mooks]] or the [[Quirky Miniboss Squad]], still making believe you're male. And at just the right moment, when he hands out for a manly handshake and ask for your name, comply and reveal your face. Works all the time, no exceptions.

'''Males:'''
# [[Troubled but Cute|Wear a leather jacket]].
# Be [[All Girls Want Bad Boys|aloof, quiet, and generally bad]]. Even if you don't get the girl, [[Perverse Sexual Lust|fangirls will flock all over you]] because there must, simply ''[[Draco in Leather Pants|must]]'', be a sensitive, [[The Woobie|tormented]] poetic soul underneath that bad boy veneer.
** For extra effect, be [[Bastard Boyfriend|abusive and sarcastic]] to her. [[Bespectacled Bastard Boyfriend|Glasses optional]].
# When options 1 & 2 just won't work, be a [[Single Woman Seeks Good Man|honourable, considerate, chivalrous, well-meaning guy]]. No, seriously, this actually works a ''lot'' more than you may think. Also, the women on whom this works are often better quality than the others.
# Go for the "[[Bishonen|slender but lithe]]" look. What girl can say no to a pretty face like that?
# If you can't do either of the above, "[[Accidental Pervert|accidentally]]" grope her breasts.
# ...or catch a [[Panty Shot|peek at her panties]].
# ...or walk in on her as she's [[Naked First Impression|bathing or undressing]].
# ...or all of the above. Preferably all at the same time; at which some one will awkwardly stumble into the room for comedic effect.
# [[Chivalrous Pervert|Proposition her heavily but don't force her]]. If you do it properly, she may consider your offer indeed.
# It never hurts to sacrifice a goat or two to get the [[Powers That Be]] to [[Cleaning Up Romantic Loose Ends|uneven out the playing field in your favor]].
# Offer to [[Hands On Approach|teach her to swing a baseball bat]].
# [[Rescue Romance|Rescue]] her from danger. Seriously, this usually always works.
# Get a job as her [[Bodyguard Crush|bodyguard]].
# Take your [[Shirtless Scene|shirt off]].
# [[Celibate Hero|Swear off love]].
# [[Rape Is Love|Force yourself onto her]]. Every tear and protest she sheds will only cause her to fall even more hopelessly in love with a strong, assertive man like you. {{color|red|'''Warning:''' If you're in the kind of story in which this doesn't work, or you're in real life, doing this will at least screw up your karma and at most get you a life sentence, or even on-site death.}}
# If she happens to be a [[Hot Amazon]] and [[Best Her to Bed Her]] ''doesn't'' apply , try playing the [[Weakness Turns Her On|physically weak, frail, helpless]] [[Ill Boy]].
** Alternatively, [[Guile Hero|prove that you can outdo her with your smarts rather than your strength]].
# Offer to help clean off that [[Romance Inducing Smudge|bit of food stuck to her cheek]].
# Special Note: If [[Where Da White Women At|you happen to be black, and she just so happens to be white, there are a TON of options available]]. These include:
** [[Soul Brotha|Grow an afro and just be really, really cool]].
** [[Bald Black Leader Guy|Or, shave your head and just be really, really cool]].
** Lose the [[Uncle Tomfoolery]].
** Become [[Barack Obama|President of]] [[Twenty Four|the United States]].
** Become [[Blazing Saddles|the new Sheriff of Rock Ridge]]. Though, some folks might need to get used to you.
*** If you do go this route, and all else fails, just offer to prove to them that [[Biggus Dickus|the rumors are, in fact, true]].

{{smallcaps|NOTE}}: Role comes with a [[Sorting Algorithm of Mortality|significant increase in the probability of dying]], especially if one of you has the [[Cartwright Curse]].

{{reflist}}
[[Category:Love Tropes]]
[[Category:TV Tropes How to Guides]]
[[Category:How To Become A Love Interest]]
[[Category:Trope]]