I Love You Because I Can't Control You: Difference between revisions
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{{trope}}{{Needs Image}}
{{quote|''"You are a hateful woman. You oppose me to the very end. But I shall forgive you. Some things are beautiful because they cannot be obtained."''
|'''Gilgamesh''', ''[[Fate/stay night]]''}}
Sometimes a person who is either insanely charismatic or has some sort of awesome magical powers can pretty much seduce [[Even the Guys Want Him|anyone]] [[Even the Girls Want Her|they]] [[Stupid Sexy Flanders|want to]], but finds a true challenge when they meet another character who, for [[Too Dumb to Fool|whatever]] [[Anti-Magic|reason]], is [[The Immune|immune]] to [[Charm Person|mystical]] [[Love Is in the Air|charms]] or their usual methods of seduction. Because their idea of love requires that the two parties involved be of roughly equivalent mental prowess, the notion that they might have an equal turns out to be highly erotic.
If [[The Casanova]] gets a [[Love Interest]], he will often fall for her because of this trope. This is often an explanation behind [[Ladykiller in Love]]. Contrast [[All Take and No Give]]. [[Sub-Trope]] of [[Forbidden Fruit]]. When the uncontrollable object [[I Didn't Mean to Turn You On|is not flattered by the attention]], she may be dealing with a [[Prince Charming Wannabe]].
{{examples}}▼
▲{{examples}}
== [[Anime]] and [[Manga]] ==
* A very large amount of [[Shoujo]] is based on this trope, where the extremely handsome and cynical male lead falls for the honest, down-to-earth female lead because he can't wrap her around his finger as easily as he can everyone else.
** Sometimes even used when it makes no sense because the heroine ''does'' fall for everything, because she's supposed to be the self-insert '''and''' the audience is supposed to find the lead so irresistible.
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* [[The Casanova|Touga]] falls in love with ''[[Revolutionary Girl Utena]]'' because she seems to be the one girl who doesn't immediately fall under his charm.
* The protagonist of [[B Gata H Kei]] brushes off the flirtations of [[The Rival|her rival's]] stupidly attractive older brother. Apparently she is the first one to ''ever'' do that. He immediately decides he must have her.
* [[Lady in Red|Akako]] [[Femme Fatal|Koizumi]] of ''[[Magic Kaito]]''. A mix of [[Hot Witch]] and [[Dark Magical Girl]] with the power to make men fall in love with her just by looking at her, she's put off by the discovery that [[Phantom Thief|Kaito Kuroba/Kaitou Kid]] is somehow [[
* One of the reasons Iason is so attracted to Riki in ''[[Ai no Kusabi]]'' is the latter's rebellious nature and defiant pride. The more Riki fights and resists him, Iason becomes more excited and determined to get Riki to submit willingly.
* Ali of the "Doom Tree arc" in the ''[[Sailor Moon]]'' anime specifically states to himself after Usagi runs away after he failed in his attempt at wooing her that "Every time she runs away it only heightens my determination to win her over..."
** Prince Dirmando likes Usagi's [[Older and Wiser]] self, Queen Serenity, for this reason as well. When Usagi reacts in the same manner, he also pursues her.
* ''[[Ranma ½]]'': In the manga and even the anime, it's one of the reasons why Ranma has feelings for Akane. He's wanted by [[Even the Guys Want Him|men]], [[Chick Magnet|women]], [[Boy Meets Ghoul|ghosts]], and ''[[Even the Wombats Want Him|a panda doodle]]''. While most girls either pursue Ranma or at least freely admit they think he's attractive, [[Tsundere|Akane]] is one of the few who refuses to show interest openly. She also seems to almost always know if [[Manipulative Bastard|Ranma is trying to trick her]] or [[Wig, Dress, Accent|is wearing a disguise]]. Because of her fiery temper and refusal to put up with his crap, they eventually fall under the [[Just Friends|best friends category]]. Considering that he's [[Hates Being Touched|uncomfortable with physical affection]] and loves a good challenge, it actually makes sense.
{{quote|'''Ranma:''' You... sure got spunk.}}
* Count Germont from ''[[Honoo no Alpen Rose]]'' is repeteadly rejected by the heroine Jeudi, but he keeps trying to make her his mistress no matter what. Lampshaded by the Count's wife Francoise, who tells Jeudi that the Count's impressed by Jeudi's ability to tell him no repeatedly, and confesses that she also envies Jeudi for it.
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* ''[[Fist of the North Star]]'': Shin loves Yuria because she is an emotionally strong-willed woman whom he sees as a challenge to make willingly fall in love with him.
== [[Comic Books]] ==
== Comics ==▼
* In the ''[[Sillage]]'' comic, ''The Collector'', a corrupt alien diplomat develops an obsession of Navis in this way. He keeps a whole harem of his past conquests but obsesses over this one girl he cannot get. (He is a powerful telepath but [[Humans Are Special]] by not being psykers - her mind is blank for him.) This develops into a genuine love that gives him what might qualify as a [[Heel Face Turn]].
** Love is a strong word. He just toned down his obsession. It didn't stop him from [[Stalker with a Crush|putting dozens of video cameras in her ship and robot friend to watch her all the day.]]
* Jean Grey in the ''[[X-Men]]'' comics didn't really seem to earn Wolverine's interest until she shouted him down. Every time she'd telekinetically clobber him and shout "I am no one's property!", it seemed to make him hotter for her. Pity every adaptation ever forgets that, having Logan fall for her [[Love At First Sight|the instant he first sees her]].
** In the [[Ultimate Marvel]] adaptation had this as well, since Wolverine underestimated Jean, she blasted him with [[Telekinesis|TK]] and afterwards he started becoming more attracted to her and even {{spoiler|abandoned his mission to kill Professor Xavier}}.
* The latest{{when}} Clock King is obsessed with Rose Wilson aka Ravager mostly because she has similar precognitive abilities that can counter his own powers.
* ''[[Elf Quest]]'': Leetah and Rayek's relationship in the early issues could easily be interpreted this way.
{{quote|'''Rayek:''' I have asked you to be my lifemate. Any maiden here would say yes!
'''Leetah:''' Then why pursue me, my arrogant one?
'''Rayek:''' [http://www.elfquest.com/comic_viewer.php?fd{{=}}/gallery/OnlineComics/OQ/OQ02/_Original%20ElfQuest%20-%202_page{{=}}14#_14# Because you are the only one worth having!] }}
== [[Fan Works]] ==
* Many [[Jerk Sue]] fanfics have the "heroine" as this kind of girl, and guys fall head over heels for her because she treats them "with spunk and feminist will"... alias like total crap, which [[You Got Spunk|makes her more "interesting"]] than the other silly, stupid, weaker, ''girly'' girls around.
* In the ''[[Avatar: The Last Airbender]]'' fic ''[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6128545/1/Sun_and_Earth Sun and Earth]'', Zuko is put in this position by Toph. She stays in a relationship with him, but has a strong need to stay free. She goes her own way, sometimes appearing in Zuko's life again. He still waits, even being married to Mai, because it's Toph being unreachable that attracts him.
▲* Many [[Jerk Sue]] fanfics have the "heroine" as this kind of girl, and guys fall head over heels for her because she treats them "with spunk and feminist will"... alias like total crap, which [[You Got Spunk|makes her more "interesting"]] than the other silly, stupid, weaker, ''girly'' girls around.
* Played
* Part of the spark for the Fleur/Harry relationship in the ''[[Harry Potter]]'' fanfic ''[[The Lie
▲* Part of the spark for the Fleur/Harry relationship in the ''[[Harry Potter]]'' fanfic ''[[The Lie Ive Lived (Fanfic)|The Lie Ive Lived]]''. Fleur first sees Harry as an actual romantic prospect when, annoyed, he deliberately snubs her in order to ask her close but non-part-Veela friend to the Yule Ball. She is visibly much more satisfied with her relationship with Harry than with her previous ones, which usually involved much older men so strongly affected by her [[Love Is in the Air|aura]] that they simply did whatever she told them to.
* Very common in ''[[Harry Potter]]'' fan fiction pairing Draco and an [[Original Character]]. Draco is portrayed as a [[Casanova]] (often referred to as "the Slytherin Sex-God"), but will quickly fall head-over-heels once it's revealed that the new girl isn't impressed by his pick-up lines.
* It's canon that ''[[Naruto]]'' is pretty rebellious and defiant. In [[Slash Fic]] this is sometimes one of the reasons that Sasuke ends up pursuing him.
* In the ''[[Death Note]]'' fanfic [http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3504829/1/Feminism ''Feminism''] Fem!Raito gets even more interested in L when her attempts to seduce him (so she can win as Kira) don't work, and in fact he's noticed many for what they were. It's very interesting how in chapter 1-2 she notes herself as far out of his league, when by the fourth or so she admits she finds him attractive
== [[Film]] ==
* In the ''[[Fantastic Four]]'' movie, Victor Von Doom's assistant wonders, "Why Sue? You could have any other woman in the world." Victor quickly rejoins, "''That's'' why. Because I could have any other woman."
* Inverted in ''Next'', where the main character falls for the love interest because his powers work better on her than anyone else.
* In ''[[Beauty and the Beast]]'' one of the reasons Gaston falls for Belle is because Belle's the only girl in town who isn't taken in by him.
== [[Literature]] ==▼
* This is eventually the motivation by which Courtney Thane is shown to be in love with Alix Crown in ''[[
▲== Literature ==
▲* This is eventually the motivation by which Courtney Thane is shown to be in love with Alix Crown in ''[[Quills Window]]'': Her aloof, diffident nature is a stark contrast to any other woman he's met.
* Possibly the only reason for Scarlet O'Hara's obsession with Ashley Wilkes in ''[[Gone with the Wind]]'' was that he was not affected by her "powers of seduction"... at least, not enough to leave his wife.
* Gilgamesh and Enkidu in the [[Ho Yay]] reading of ''[[The Epic of Gilgamesh]]''.
* [[Ayn Rand]]'s ''[[The Fountainhead]]'' has a lot of [[Ho Yay]] subtext between Howard Roark and Gail Wynand, with Wynand's feeling for Roark being an example of this trope.
* ''[[Wuthering Heights (novel)|Wuthering Heights]]'' - Edgar for Cathy Earnshaw. She walks all over him, ignores his wishes, throws temper tantrums and obviously prefers the company of Heathcliff, and yet he refuses to give her up.
* ''[[Pride and Prejudice]]'': Elizabeth Bennet is [[Genre Savvy]] enough to realize this is why Mr. Darcy fell in love with
{{quote|'''Elizabeth:''' Now be sincere; did you admire me for my impertinence?
'''Darcy:''' For the liveliness of your mind, I did.
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** Interestingly, [[Jane Austen]] takes the opposite approach to the trope in her next novel ''[[Mansfield Park]]'', where Henry Crawford and his sister are both fully aware that the only reason he wants to make Fanny Price fall in love with him is because she's the first girl who doesn't fawn over him and crave his attention. The difference from ''P&P'' is that [[It's All About Me]] in Crawford's case.
** [[Gender Flip|Gender flipped]] in Austen's ''[[Emma]]'', where Emma falls in love with Mr. Knightley, the only person on Earth who doesn't worship her or treat her like she's perfect.
* ''[[Discworld]]'':
** In ''[[
** In ''[[
* ''[[Twilight (novel)|Twilight]]'' has a variation: "I love you because I can't read your mind." He actually can, and regularly ''does,'' control her.
** Also, it's implied that it's supposed to be because Bella is way too good to fall for looks alone... except that's all she talks about when she describes Edward, so the meaning is lost.
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* "Face" Loran invokes this trope in the [[X Wing Series]] with Dia Passik, who because of her tough childhood never saw any of his films, and thus is just about the only woman of her age who doesn't gush over him. Although he meant it ironically, in the end the two of them ''do'' get together.
* Esteban for Clara in ''[[The House of the Spirits]]''.
* Caine for Diana in ''[[Gone (novel)]]''. He fell for her because she was the only girl who hadn't fallen for his charms.
* In ''[[The Heir Chronicles|The Wizard Heir]]'' by Cinda Williams Chima, protagonist Seph has always been able to get any girl he wants thanks to his magically-aided charisma. Then he meets Madison Moss, whose [[Anti-Magic]] makes her immune. You can guess where this is going.
* In ''[[The Novels Of The Jaran]]'', Ilya fall in love with Tess because she constantly defies him when nearly everyone else in the Jaran obeys him. The fact that she doesn't fall for his charisma and good looks like most other women probably factored in, too.
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* In [[Trudi Canavan]]'s ''[[The Black Magician Trilogy|The Ambassador's Mission]]'' Achati laments the fact that being in control of his slaves they have to do as he says saying any relationship therefore lacks risk "only when the person could easily leave you do you appriciate it when he stays" {{spoiler|and seems to have taken an interest in Dannyl at least partly due to a more equal status}}
▲== Live Action TV ==
* There's an episode of ''[[Star Trek: The Next Generation]]'' where a mindreader is fascinated by someone she cannot read. He turns out to be a hologram.
* Also from ''[[Star Trek: The Next Generation]]'', Q's [[Word of Gay|attraction]] to Picard is probably the result of this trope. He seems rather pleased with humanity's unpredictability, after all.
* In ''[[Babylon 5]]'', Londo announces to his wives that he's going to divorce all but one of them. All of them dislike him, but Timov is frank about it and refuses to fawn over him to secure some of his wealth and influence the way Mariel and Daggair do. He keeps Timov because he knows where he stands with her. It's somewhat implied he figured out she saved him and knows she wasn't involved in his assassination attempt.
* In ''[[Dark Angel]]'', there is an episode focused on one of the X series fugitives who has [[Mind Control]] powers. She's dating this mob guy called Dougie, despite him being below average in pretty much every respect, because her powers don't work on him. She helped him rip off his organisation, manipulating him in more traditional ways.
* In both ''[[The Sookie Stackhouse Mysteries]]'' and the TV adaptation ''[[True Blood]]'', Sookie was initially attracted to Bill the vampire mainly because she couldn't read his mind, though this was mostly since she wasn't [[Squick
** The fact that he saved her from the Rattrays and {{spoiler|fed her his blood, causing her to have sexy dreams about him}} didn't hurt any. Of course it turned out {{spoiler|he'd orchestrated the whole thing specifically to get this response,}} which may make this a subversion.
** There's also Eric, who, in ''True Blood'', is mostly into Sookie because he's a bit intimidated by her powers, as shown in a fantasy of his where she tops the hell out of him.
* There's a bit of this in ''[[Castle]]''; Richard Castle can [[The Charmer|charm any lady he likes around his little finger]] except for Detective Kate Beckett, who isn't suckered in by any of his usual methods... which makes Castle, who was getting bored with the fawning ladies themselves trying to snare or drape themselves over him, a lot more interested in her as a result. It's also suggested (including by the actors) that it's not so much about Castle trying to find some way to control Beckett as he is kind of thrilled to find someone who can control ''him'', as Castle has no real authority figure in his life except for her.
* ''[[Scrubs]]'': Dr. Cox loves Jordan because she's one of the only people who can stand up to him. Jordan loves Dr. Cox because he's one of the only people who can stand up to her.
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* [[Subverted]] in the ''[[Smallville]]'' episode, "Heat". When Desiree finds that her seduction power has no effect on Clark Kent, she gets pissed and immediately starts trying to ruin his life. For example, she frames him for arson.
* ''[[Noah's Arc]]'': This is one of the things that draws Ricky towards Junito early on (as Ricky's sexual advances don't seem to take).
* Fans would have us believe that [[Firefly|Jayne]] feels this way about [[Axe Crazy]] River Tam.
* ''[[The Secret Life of the American Teenager]]'' has this in the pilot, proving that at least one of the writers actually knows how to write. The main love interest, after talking to the main character, talks to his councilor.
{{quote|"I asked her out, and she turned me down. Of course, I must have her."}}
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* In ''[[Haven]]'', Chris Brody is attracted to Audrey only because she doesn't fall for him {{spoiler|like all the town's people do due to his Trouble.}}
== [[Music]] ==▼
▲== Music ==
* [[Don McLean]]'s ''Everybody Loves Me Baby'' is a great example of this. "Everybody loves me, baby - what's the matter with you?"
== [[Theater]] ==▼
* It's possible to interpret ''[[The Taming of the Shrew]]'' like this, with Kate being impressed that she is unable to frighten away Petruchio (YMMV of course). This is the approach taken in ''[[
▲== Theater ==
▲* It's possible to interpret ''[[The Taming of the Shrew]]'' like this, with Kate being impressed that she is unable to frighten away Petruchio (YMMV of course). This is the approach taken in ''[[Ten Things I Hate About You]]''.
{{quote|'''Kat''': Why would you care if I never woke up again?
'''Patrick''': Because then I'd have to start taking out girls who actually liked me.
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* In ''[[My Fair Lady]]'', Prof. Higgins realizes his attraction to Eliza only when she leaves him and declares that she doesn't need him.
== [[Video Games]] ==▼
▲== Video Games ==
* ''[[Tales of Symphonia]]'': Zelos Wilder is used to girls throwing themselves at him, so naturally he takes a keen interest in Sheena, who refuses to fall for any of his charms. {{spoiler|If you get Zelos's backstory, he reveals that his happy-go-lucky exterior is just [[Stepford Smiler|a facade]], and he's actually quite cynical--and that ''especially'' goes for his instant harem, whom he believes is more interested in being with Zelos the Chosen than they are in Zelos the person. Sheena doesn't care if he's the Chosen or no, meaning that whatever she is feeling for Zelos -- even though it's currently "he's a disgusting pervert" -- is genuine.}}
* In the second ''[[Knights of the Old Republic]]'' game, that might explain some of Sion's [[Stalker with a Crush]] dialogue towards a female Exile.
* ''[[Togainu no Chi]]'': Shiki has interest in Akira because he refuses to surrender to him and doesn't beg for his life.
=== [[Visual Novels]] ===▼
▲== Visual Novels ==
* Gilgamesh towards Saber in ''[[Fate/stay night]]''. In one route he even states to her face {{spoiler|as he's dying}} that "Some things are more beautiful because you can't have them."
▲== [[Web Comics]] ==
* ''[[Gunnerkrigg Court]]'': Not love ''per se'', since he seems incapable of loving anyone besides himself, but Coyote is clearly fascinated with Antimony and Reynardine precisely because they're not afraid to disagree with him or brush him off. In contrast, Ysengrin is a fawning yes-man to Coyote, so Coyote barely gives him the time of day.
* ''[[Skin Horse]]'': Tigerlily Jones is the only (human) female to appear for more than a panel and not find Tip extremely attractive. She barely even noticed him unless forced to. This is probably the main reason she's the only woman Tip's actually thought twice about (without sleeping with her or her trying to kill him).
== [[Western Animation]] ==▼
▲== Western Animation ==
* Nobody probably finds his mental equal as literally "highly erotic" as David Xanatos of ''[[Gargoyles]]'' does. He tells his new wife so in the episode "Upgrade."
** [[Trickster Archetype|Puck]] feels this way (probably platonicly) towards David Xanatos.
* In ''[[Batman Beyond]],'' Xander falls for Max because she is tough and sassy, unlike his sickeningly submissive servants.
* ''[[The Fairly
* In ''[[The Owl House]]'', this is [[Starter Villain|Warden Wrath's]] stated reason for [[Villainous Crush|his crush on Eda]]. Being [[The Jailer]] of the Emperor's Coven, Eda is the one criminal they simply cannot catch, something he finds oddly alluring.
* From ''[[Harley Quinn (TV series)|Harley Quinn]]'', [[Darkseid]] claims he was first attracted to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kimberly_Guilfoyle#See_also Kimberly Guilfoyle] while [[Take That|he was making a keynote adress at the RNC]] and saw "her cold, dead eyes from across the room" [[Widget Series|(it's that kind of series)]]. After proving unable to intimidate her in the least, even after threatening to kill her, the two started dating.
== [[Real Life]] ==
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[[Category:Love Tropes]]
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