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I Need a Freaking Drink: Difference between revisions
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[[File:INAFD.jpg|link=The Colbert Report|thumb|350px|Oh, sweet brown medicine, take away the pain...]]
{{quote|''"In victory, you deserve champagne; in defeat, [[Morton's Fork|you need it]]."''
|'''[[Napoleon Bonaparte]]'''}}
Ever just have one of ''those'' days? Where things just [[It Got Worse|go from bad to worse]]? [[Disaster Dominoes|Everything that could go wrong does go wrong]]? Does [[Humiliation Conga|the entire world]] [[Butt Monkey|have it in for you]]? Or have you just had enough of being [[Surrounded by Idiots]]?
That's when you just say to yourself (or whoever happens to overhear)... "'''I
This comes in one of two flavors:
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{{examples}}
== Anime and Manga ==
* In ''[[
* From ''[[Puella Magi Madoka Magica]]'': "It's always hard being a grown up. That's what alcohol's for."
* Fujisawa-sensei from the ''[[El Hazard]]'' OAV has a moment like this when he realizes that he and his student Makoto [[Not in Kansas Anymore|aren't at Shininome High School anymore]] and scrambles for both a cigarette and a nip from his handy flask:
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* [[Tintin|Captain Haddock]] is like this [[The Alcoholic|all the time]].
* [http://kotorfanmedia.net/node/9227 This]{{Dead link}} ''[[Knights of the Old Republic]]'' fic features ''Carth'' of all people saying something to this effect.▼
▲== Fan Fic ==
* In the ''[[Harry Potter]]'' fanfic
▲* [http://kotorfanmedia.net/node/9227 This] ''[[Knights of the Old Republic]]'' fic features ''Carth'' of all people saying something to this effect.
* Said by George (without the
▲* In the ''[[Harry Potter]]'' fanfic, ''[[Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality]]'', Professor McGonagall goes into the bar for a drink after a long day of taking Harry shopping for school supplies. ''[[Justified Trope|This]] [[Insufferable Genius|is]] [[Weirdness Magnet|perfectly]] [[The Chessmaster|justified]].''
* One ''[[My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic]]'' fanfic,
▲* Said by George (without the “freaking” part) in ''[[With Strings Attached]]'' after John reveals his wings to him. The four then proceed to a bar and get trashed (except for John, who can't any more).
▲* One ''My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic'' fanfic, "Once Bitten, Twice Shy", gave this reaction to ''[[Shrinking Violet|Fluttershy]]'' of all ponies on a disastrous [[Not a Date|not-date]] with Twilight Sparkle. After one setback, Rarity gives her a glass of wine to help get her confidence up. Following a particularly stressful incident, Fluttershy ''drains'' most of the wine bottle and has to be magically sobered up before she's able to stand, let alone go back into the restaurant.
* In ''[[The Ballad of Twilight Sparkle]]'', Twilight Sparkle has this reaction to a movie studio's legal team trying to intimidate her into signing over the rights to her likeness for a movie the Great and Powerful Trixie is making. It probably didn't help that Twilight had thoroughly embarrassed herself in front of Trixie several times earlier in the fic.
* In a ''[[Bleach]]'' fanfic called
* In ''[[Through a Diamond Sky]]'', as Flynn's working on escaping his captors, he remarks to himself that he needs a nap, a cold beer, and a ''long'' talk with his wife; not necessarily in that order.
* In the ''[[My Little Pony:
* In the ''[[Harry Potter]]/[[Bewitched]]'' crossover ''[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7051218/1/Harry-Potter-and-the-Elder-Sect Harry Potter and the Elder Sect]'', this is Narcissa Malfoy's reaction to seeing Lucius dancing and singing [[Right Said Fred]]'s "I'm Too Sexy" along with his altered and now-animate Dark Mark.
* Appears in the [[crossover]] story ''[[My Apartment Manager is not an Isekai Character]]'', when Misato and Kaji from ''[[Neon Genesis Evangelion]]'' discover that they and their friends aren't the only ones in the story who are from other stories.
{{quote|"If I hadn't spent most of my recent life working with Ritsuko and the MAGI, I'd ask how much you've had to drink."
"Not a drop, I swear! Although I need a freakin' drink," Kaji admitted.}}
* This is the reaction PRT ENE directory Emily Piggot has every time she has to deal with the Family in the ''[[Worm]]/[[Luna Varga]]'' crossover ''[[Taylor Varga]]''.
** It's also Rebecca "Alexandria" Costa-Brown's reaction in at least one case:
{{quote|With a deep sigh, she shook her head, said "Door to tequila," and stepped through the resulting portal without looking back.}}
== Film ==
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* ''[[Unforgiven]]'', another Clint Eastwood film. Clint's character, who is [[The Atoner|trying to put his murderous past behind him]], has sworn off the bottle because when he gets drunk, he gets mean. {{spoiler|When the news that Ned was killed reaches him, he takes one drink after another, signaling a return to his murderous ways and one hell of a violent revenge coming against Ned's killer, Little Bill}}.
* ''[[From Hell]]'': One of the prostitutes says as much and goes out to buy some hooch. Bad idea with Jack The Ripper on the prowl.
* In ''[[UHF (film)|UHF]]'', [["Weird Al" Yankovic]]'s character, George, has hit the low point of his life, so he leaves the TV studio saying that he needs a drink. His friend Bob points out that he doesn't drink, and George replies, "Yeah, but I've been meaning to start."
* ''[[Galaxy Quest]]'': "Where are you going?" "To see if there's a pub!"
* Played with in ''[[Star Trek VI
** In ''[[Star Trek: First Contact]]'', Zephram Cochrane was found very inebriated in a bar after the Borg shell his base camp—though it was implied that he could [[The Alcoholic|often be found there]] Borg attack or no.
* ''[[Indian in The Cupboard]]'' had the cowboy character stumble hungover out of the titular magic cupboard, unaware that he'd been transported through time and space (and size). After swearing to lay off the hooch several times in a row, he realizes that he's surrounded by giants, and proclaims, "Oh my dear sweet Lord. I need me a drink."
* Played with in ''[[Airplane!]]'' by Lloyd Bridges' character, Steve McCroskey, progressing from smoking, to drinking, to amphetamines, to sniffing airplane glue.
* Shorti does this in ''[[Scary Movie]] 2''. [[Squick|Watching the butler "mishandle" the turkey for the feast]] forces him to down a bottle of red wine in short order.
* ''[[Red Dawn]]'' has Col. Tanner explaining military tactics to a bunch of high-schoolers: "Now I think that's pretty simple. Any questions so far?" Kid: "Yeah, what's a ''flank''?" "What's a defilade?" Tanner: "I need a drink!"
*
* Done in the 2009 ''[[Sherlock Holmes]]'' film. After [[Awesome By Analysis|systematically taking out his opponent in a pit fight]], he walks over to a small table, snatches a bottle of beer off it, uncorks it with his teeth and chugs it as he walks by.
** Of course, Holmes tends to be the opposite of this, in that when things are crazy is for the most part when he ''doesn't'' need a freaking drink. Calm moments and inactive periods, however, inspire him to get zonked out of his mind to stop it from being bored.
* Variation in ''[[Hellboy (film)|Hellboy]] 2: The Golden Army''. "You're in love. Have a beer."
* One of the Americans in 1999's ''[[The Mummy Trilogy|The Mummy
* ''[[Benny and Joon]]'': Shortly after meeting [[Cloudcuckoolander]] Sam for the first time, Benny mutters "I need a beer."
* In ''[[My Man Godfrey]]'', during a typical evening at home, Mr. Bullock takes a whole tray of martinis
* After a wild skimmer chase through downtown [[Star Wars|Coruscant]] and an attempt on Padme's life, Obi-Wan announces his intention of getting a drink - or two. Never get into a vehicle piloted by [[Drives Like Crazy|Anakin Skywalker]].
* [[Pirates of the Caribbean|"But why is the rum gone?"]]
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* In ''[[The Little Shop of Horrors]]'', Mr. Mushnik returns late to the shop to get some money to pay his restaurant bill and sees Seymour feeding body parts to the plant. He instantly dashes back to the restaurant and demands alcohol—any kind they've got, as long as he gets drunk.
* In ''[[The Avengers (film)|The Avengers]]'', after {{spoiler|his army is destroyed}} and {{spoiler|[[Curb Stomp Battle|he gets hilariously stomped by the Hulk]]}}, Loki admits to the Avengers that, if its okay with them, he'll have the drink Tony offered him earlier.
* A truly ironic example happens at the end of ''[[The Untouchables]]''. With Al Capone finally behind bars, Eliot Ness is understandably exhausted as he packs up his office and thinks about Malone. A reporter stops him and mentions that Prohibition is due to be repealed, and then asks Ness what he might do then. Ness responds, "I think I’ll have a drink."
== Literature ==
* ''[[Discworld]]'':
** Commander Vimes tends to think this when things are going particularly poorly, but after ''[[
** It's actually been mentioned that Vimes is, in fact, slightly "Knurd": meaning he's more sober than sober, and actually needs at least one drink in him to be "normal". Klatchian coffee is so strong that it has the same effect, but the Klatchians make very certain they are well and truly out of their heads on ''orakh'' (the only liquor on the Disc that can match scumble for potency, made from cactus sap and scorpion venom) before partaking.
** In a scene in ''[[
** In ''[[Hogfather]]'', when a huge surplus of extra belief floods Discworld, one of the beings created is Bilious, the Oh God of Hangovers, who experiences the consequences when other people engage in this trope. At one point, he much relishes a chance to turn the tables on a god who loves to get drunk.
** In ''[[
* ''[[Good Omens]]'': Crowley and Aziraphale do this after Crowley delivers the newborn Antichrist to the hospital where he'll be switched with another family's baby, and the pair are forced to confront the possibility of [[The End of the World as We Know It]], and all the great things Earth has going for it.
{{quote|'''Crowley''': ...The point is... the point I'm trying to make... is dolphins. That's my point...}}
** This also happens to Crowley in the backstory:
{{quote|Crowley got a commendation for the Spanish Inquisition. He ''had'' been in Spain then, mainly hanging around cantinas in the nicer parts, and hadn’t even known about it until the commendation arrived. He’d gone to have a look, and come back and got drunk for a week.}}
* Harry Potter gets his first taste of Ogden's Fire Whiskey in ''[[
** More fitting this trope is of course Hagrid's reaction to only narrowly escaping the most powerful dark wizard of all times: "Haven't go' any brandy, have yeh, Molly?" asked Hagrid a little shakily, "Fer medicinal purposes?"
* Happens a lot in the ''[[Garrett P.I.]]'' series, as befits a homage to hardboiled detective fiction. Even the Grand Inquisitor demanded brandy in a jar when he stopped by to complain about his ecclesiastical colleagues. Upon his return from one emotionally-wracking case, Garrett's associates practically ''forced'' a mug into the main character's hand, anticipating that this trope was in effect.
* Lightsong, a [[Physical God]] in ''[[Warbreaker]]'', is rather fond of trying to get drunk, despite his long-suffering high priest's insistence that he is physically incapable of getting drunk.
* [[Henry Kuttner
{{quote|"Yeah, that's it," he murmured after a while. "''Whew''! I guess {{spoiler|Vanning must have been the only guy who ever reached into the middle of nest week and--killed himself}}! I think I'll get tight."
And he did. }}
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'''Macros:''' I need a drink.
'''Miranda:''' First you need a bath. }}
* In [[Robert A. Heinlein]]'s short
* In "[[Best Served Cold (novel)|Best Served Cold]]" by Joe Abercrombie, Cosca turns "A drink, a drink, a drink," almost into a [[Survival Mantra|personal credo]].
* In ''[[Wheel of Time]]'' {{spoiler|after Min, Aviendha and Elayne bond Rand, Elayne decides to take this opportunity to finally bed Rand}}. Birgitte, {{spoiler|who's bonded to Elayne and, like everyone else is aware of everything Elayne is doing and feeling through their bond}} and the other two decide that yes they do indeed need a drink, in the plural sense and as soon as can be arranged.
* In
* Happens pretty frequently in ''[[Jeeves and Wooster (novel)|Jeeves and Wooster]]'', since Bertie's automatic stress response is to go someplace and order a few drinks. If Jeeves is in the vicinity, he'll prepare the drink, but [[Nerves of Steel|he never needs a drink himself]].
▲== Live Action TV ==
* The Trope image is ''[[The Colbert Report]]''. During [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/77985/november-08-2006/the-word---sigh this "The Wørd" segment] after the 2006 Midterms (and giving the Democrats control of the House), Stephen Colbert was visibly depressed, slouched over and with [[Face Palm|his head in his hand]]. The bullet point reacted to this by displaying this exact phrase (see above)
** Stephen proceeds to pull out what appears to be scotch and first the Word says "Fight it" before he gives up and pours, changing the message to "F*ck it" and finishing with "Oh, sweet brown medicine, take away the pain..." as he downs the whole glass
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* Ben Harper in ''[[My Family]]'' takes this to almost [[Catch Phrase]] levels.
* Happens every now and then on ''[[Babylon 5]].'' In one episode, Londo hands Vir an unpleasant mission while at the bar and Vir finishes off the drink his boss abandoned at the table before heading out. The temptation is probably pretty heavy for [[The Alcoholic|Garibaldi]] at times.
* As with virtually every other liquor-related trope, ''[[Battlestar Galactica
* ''[[How I Met Your Mother]]'' when Ted has to break up for the second time with a girl he dated much earlier but broke up with her on her birthday. When he realizes it's her birthday yet again and she starts to say how he's brought hope back into her life. He turns to the waiter and says "Oh so much more wine."
* Jen does this in ''[[The IT Crowd]]'' when hearing of how a high school classmate has the perfect successful life that Jen wished she had.
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* ''[[Stargate Universe]]'', Air Part 3. {{spoiler|Chloe Armstrong's mother finds out her husband is dead and her daughter is stranded on a ship billions of miles away. The way she throws down whiskey is this trope without the phrase}}.
* ''[[NCIS]]''. "Minimum Security". Gibbs grumbles "[[Must Have Caffeine|I need coffee]]" after being woken up by a naked Tony pointing his pistol at an iguana.
* In the ''[[Supernatural (TV series)|Supernatural]]'' episode "Red Sky
** Also, in the episode "The Real Ghostbusters", Sam and Dean say "I need a drink" in sync after being thoroughly weirded-out by some LARPing fans. ''Of themselves.''
** Also, Castiel does a variation of this in the season 5 finale (when they realise that they are really ''really'' screwed):
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** And generally Dean does this on a regular basis. The only thing that separates this from [[Drowning My Sorrows]] is how quickly he recovers afterwards. Considering the things that are trying to kill him/beat him/torture him, you know things are really bad when he ''stops'' drinking! {{spoiler|This is also a sign of him being absolutely crushed by everything and still (somehow) going: he stops enjoying things that used to make him feel good}}.
* In the ill-fated early 90s reboot of ''[[Dark Shadows (TV series)|Dark Shadows]]'', after saving Josette from the zombie of Jeremiah Collins, his father Joshua says, "I need a stiff drink!"
* In one episode of ''[[Yes Minister]]'', Jim Hacker comes home and when Annie asks if he'd like a drink he says to make it a triple. She realizes this is serious, but
* A double example appears in one episode of ''[[Friends]]'': first Monica accepts Rachel's offer of margaritas after her painstakingly organised photo collection gets messed up; later, while collecting ingredients for said margaritas from Ross' apartment, Rachel accidentally overhears Emily leave a message on Ross' answering machine saying she's having doubts about re-marrying. She immediately unscrews the cap of the tequila she's holding and takes a swig straight from the bottle.
** In the episode "Everybody Finds Out", Phoebe and Rachel decide to have Phoebe hit on Chandler to prove that he and Monica are seeing each other. This escalates to the point where they're in Chandler's apartment for a date. When Phoebe pours them wine and they toast, both promptly drain their entire glasses.
* A noteworthy example in a ''[[M*A*S*H (television)|M*A*S*H]]'' episode is when Hawkeye takes a challenge to abstain from alcohol. The story climaxes with Hawkeye having the terrifying experience of keeping a prisoner's grenade from detonating in the operating room. After the successful conclusion, the gang goes to the Officer's Club where Hawkeye gets a drink saying that he needs it. However, after a few fateful seconds, Hawkeye pushes the drink away saying, "I'll have it when I ''want'' it, not when I need it."
* Amusingly subverted in one episode of ''[[Bones]]'' (paraphrased):
{{quote|'''Brennan''': ''(searching)'' I need vodka!
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* Toward the end of the ''[[Parks and Recreation]]'' episode "Dave Returns" ([[S 4 E 15]]), Leslie says "And now I am going to endorse ten beers into my mouth, because today has been very stressful." (Or words to that effect). Despite the large number of beers, it counts as needing a freaking drink and not [[Drowning My Sorrows]] because Leslie specifically cites stress as a factor, and it's a one-time thing (at a party at a bar, no less).
* In the ''[[Bitchin' Kitchen]]'', when Nadia asks Panos' wife how she deals with her marriage, her response is "a little ouzo goes a long way."
== Music ==
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And if we're being honest, then honestly, I think I need a drink }}
* Also, there's Terri Clark's "The World Needs a Drink", where she fantasizes about gathering all the world powers together for a drink at the bar to forget their troubles.
== New Media ==
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* The end of the trivia section on ''[[Transformers]]'' wiki [http://tfwiki.net/wiki/B.O.T._%28episode%29 article] for the [[The Transformers (animation)|G1]] episode B.O.T.:
{{quote|"Good God, I need a stiff drink."}}
* Played straight on the online Test Cricket radio station [
* [[The Nostalgia Chick]] is a full-blown [[Lady Drunk]], and went straight for the bottle after watching ''The Christmas Shoes''.
== Radio ==
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* [[True Capitalist|Ghost]] often invokes this trope by name after a particularly effective set of trolls.
== Recorded and Stand Up Comedy ==
* Dr. Conway (known as Uncle Kage) was talking about his woes with the [[No Celebrities Were Harmed|"ABC" Security Company]]--then he slipped and said the company's ''real'' name {{spoiler|(ADT)}}. While he usually sips wine from a glass throughout his show, after that goof he chugged straight from the bottle, much to the amusement of the audience.
* [[Kathy Griffin]] 's mother's reaction to hearing that Kathy would be going on a cruise with lesbians and their children: "I need a drink!" *click*
== Tabletop Games ==
* ''[[Magic: The Gathering]]'' gives us [https://web.archive.org/web/20070831041200/http://ww2.wizards.com/gatherer/CardDetails.aspx?id=12389 this card]. It starts out as [[No More for Me]]. But when the floating thing ''comes back'', he decides trying to sober up didn't help.
▲== Theater ==
* ''[[A Very Potter Musical]]'':
{{quote|"Uggh. I need a butterbeer."}}
== Video Games ==
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* In ''[[Ar Tonelico 3]]'', {{spoiler|returning character Cocona}} is often seen mentioning her need for a drink whenever you end up building some of the more reality-breaking items in the game, such as a floating tablet... out of spare parts.
== Web Comics ==
* ''[[Nodwick]]'': After Piffany essentially [http://comic.nodwick
▲* ''[[Nodwick]]'': After Piffany essentially [http://nodwick.humor.gamespy.com/gamespyarchive/index.php?date=2008-09-17 out-lawyers a pair of devils], one of them proclaims,
{{quote|"I do so need a three-martini lunch right now."}}
* Variation in ''[[Questionable Content]]'' [http://www.questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=513 #513]:
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* In ''[[The Adventures of Dr. McNinja]]'', the titular Doctor goes out to a bar after arguing with his parents. He orders a bottle of Jose Cuervo tequila and ''downs the entire bottle in the time it takes the bartender to turn around and get him a shot glass.''
{{quote|'''Dr. [[McNinja]]''': "It disappeared! Oh my God! Jose Cuervo must have been a ninja too! HAHAHAHA!" *thud*}}
* Variation in "[[Prequel|On the Origins of PCs]]" in ''[[The Order of the Stick]]''; when Elan insists [[You All Meet in An Inn|you have to recruit adventurers in a tavern]], Roy asks "Why? I need adventurers, not a drink. ...Well, not JUST a drink."
** And played straight with the Cliffport Police Chief [http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0339.html here].
** Aaand Durkon combines it with [[Brain Bleach]] [http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0688.html here].
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{{quote|'''Carson''': Isn't it premature for Bill to be hitting the celebratory champagne? Oh, never mind, that's vodka.}}
* In what is likely an homage to ''[[Airplane!]]'', at one point in ''[[Bob and George]],'' [[Mega Man X|Zero]] mentions "I picked the wrong week to stop snorting [[Transformers|Energon cubes]].
* [https://web.archive.org/web/20091219225530/http://starslip.com/2009/04/23/starslip-number-1021/ This] ''[[Starslip]]'' strip.
* [http://concessioncomic.com/index.php?pid=20091013 This] [[Concession]] strip.
* ''[[Out There]]'': Miriam ''always'' needs a freaking drink. Sherry, Araceli, Rebecca, et. al. ''sometimes'' need a freaking drink. Clayton never needs one, but he'll have one anyway, thank you.
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'''DM:''' [[In and Out of Character|In-character or out-of-character?]]
'''Twilight:''' BOTH! }}
* ''[[Schlock Mercenary]]''
** Massey is [//www.schlockmercenary.com/2016-06-01 going to have] an olives-and-ethanol lunch.
** Alexia Murtaugh suggests "[//www.schlockmercenary.com/2019-03-20 drinks and debriefing]" after they sent their [[Brain Uploading|clones]] on a one-way trip… while Haley Sorlie [//www.schlockmercenary.com/2019-03-22 visited the same bar] trying to get over the discovery that [[Genius Ditz|Kaff Tagon]] can casually "read her like a book".
== Web Original ==
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* Subverted in ''[[The Battery's Down]]'': Molly's cousin tells Dani that [[Acceptable Targets|he's Irish]] which means he needs he "needs another fucking drink".
* It's not alcoholic, but the version of Kyle Rayner in ''[[DC Nation]]'' frequently "needs a sketchpad" in the aftermath of shit hitting fan.
* Dr. Shelton says [https://web.archive.org/web/20140208165941/http://z7.invisionfree.com/thegangoffive/index.php?showtopic=7319
* Said by [[I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream|a Great Soft Jelly Thing]] in [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_e4vBiN4kts this] [[YouTube Poop]].
* [[The Fan Fiction Critic]], during her [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZYBLNhSI40Q&feature=related review] of ''[[Legolas By Laura]]'': "[[Running Gag|It's five o'clock somewhere, right?]]" *swig*
* [[Warning! Readers' Advisory|Derek the Bard]] often finds himself in need of one, and often reaches for a crystal skull full of vodka.
* In ''[[Pay Me, Bug!]]'', Grif Vindh says this over, and over, and over.
== Western Animation ==
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* Another children's cartoon example: Jake from ''[[Adventure Time]]'', when he attends a really boring meeting.
{{quote|'''Jake:''' Ugh. ''(turns to a prince)'' Buy a [[It Makes Sense in Context|la]][[Disguised in Drag|dy]] a drink?}}
== Real Life ==
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{{reflist}}
[[Category:{{PAGENAME}}]]
[[Category:Hard-Drinking Tropes]]
[[Category:Stock Phrases]]
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