If I Do Not Return: Difference between revisions

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== [[Film]] ==
== [[Film]] ==
* ''[[Hot Shots Part Deux]]'':
* ''[[Hot Shots Part Deux]]'':
{{quote| "If I'm not back in fifteen minutes, you know what to do."<br />
{{quote|"If I'm not back in fifteen minutes, you know what to do."
"Go on without you?" <br />
"Go on without you?"
"No. Wait another fifteen minutes!" }}
"No. Wait another fifteen minutes!" }}
* "...call the Pope!" (''[[Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter]]'')
* "...call the Pope!" (''[[Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter]]'')
* ''[[Big Trouble in Little China]]'':
* ''[[Big Trouble in Little China]]'':
{{quote| '''Jack Burton''': Okay. You people sit tight, hold the fort and keep the home fires burning. And if we're not back by dawn... call the president. }}
{{quote|'''Jack Burton''': Okay. You people sit tight, hold the fort and keep the home fires burning. And if we're not back by dawn... call the president. }}
* ''[[Ace Ventura]]'' also did the "... just wait longer" line.
* ''[[Ace Ventura]]'' also did the "... just wait longer" line.
* ''Mission To Mars'' did it straight, although obviously the guy disobeyed the order or we'd get a [[Downer Ending]] where they're stuck on Mars with no way out. In retrospect, it seems like they should have been asking the alien to hurry up the holographic history lesson since they gave the guy such a short time limit.
* ''Mission To Mars'' did it straight, although obviously the guy disobeyed the order or we'd get a [[Downer Ending]] where they're stuck on Mars with no way out. In retrospect, it seems like they should have been asking the alien to hurry up the holographic history lesson since they gave the guy such a short time limit.
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** And some traitorous mannequins.
** And some traitorous mannequins.
* ''[[Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan|Star Trek II the Wrath of Khan]]''. Kirk and company are trapped in an asteroid.
* ''[[Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan|Star Trek II the Wrath of Khan]]''. Kirk and company are trapped in an asteroid.
{{quote| '''Kirk:''' Captain Spock. If you don't hear from us within one hour, your orders are to restore what power you can, take the ''Enterprise'' to the nearest starbase and alert Starfleet Command when out of jamming range.<br />
{{quote|'''Kirk:''' Captain Spock. If you don't hear from us within one hour, your orders are to restore what power you can, take the ''Enterprise'' to the nearest starbase and alert Starfleet Command when out of jamming range.
'''Uhura:''' Sir, we won't leave you behind!<br />
'''Uhura:''' Sir, we won't leave you behind!
'''Kirk:''' Uhura, if you don't hear from us, there won't ''be'' anybody behind. }}
'''Kirk:''' Uhura, if you don't hear from us, there won't ''be'' anybody behind. }}
** However subverted in that Kirk was talking in code (hours meaning days) because he suspected Khan was tapping into the signal.
** However subverted in that Kirk was talking in code (hours meaning days) because he suspected Khan was tapping into the signal.
** ''[[Star Trek (film)|Star Trek]]''.
** ''[[Star Trek (film)|Star Trek]]''.
{{quote| '''Spock:''' Jim. The statistical likelihood that our plan will succeed is less than 4.3%.<br />
{{quote|'''Spock:''' Jim. The statistical likelihood that our plan will succeed is less than 4.3%.
'''Kirk:''' It'll work.<br />
'''Kirk:''' It'll work.
'''Spock:''' In the event that I am unsuccessful, please tell Lieutenant Uhura--<br />
'''Spock:''' In the event that I am unsuccessful, please tell Lieutenant Uhura--
'''Kirk:''' Spock. It'll ''work''. }}
'''Kirk:''' Spock. It'll ''work''. }}
* Subtly alluded to in ''[[Pirates of the Caribbean]]: The Curse of the Black Pearl''. When Gibbs asks Jack Sparrow what they should do if Sparrow and Will Turner don't return, Jack's only reply is "Keep to the Code", meaning "if we don't come back, go on without us".
* Subtly alluded to in ''[[Pirates of the Caribbean]]: The Curse of the Black Pearl''. When Gibbs asks Jack Sparrow what they should do if Sparrow and Will Turner don't return, Jack's only reply is "Keep to the Code", meaning "if we don't come back, go on without us".
** Knowing the pirates of that trilogy, it is more like "actually give us a chance to come back before leaving us."
** Knowing the pirates of that trilogy, it is more like "actually give us a chance to come back before leaving us."
* Hilarious subversion in ''[[Serenity]]'':
* Hilarious subversion in ''[[Serenity]]'':
{{quote| '''Mal''': Zoe, ship is yours. Remember. If anything happens to me, or if you don't hear from me within the hour, you take this ship... and ''you come rescue me''.<br />
{{quote|'''Mal''': Zoe, ship is yours. Remember. If anything happens to me, or if you don't hear from me within the hour, you take this ship... and ''you come rescue me''.
'''Zoe''': What, and risk my ship?<br />
'''Zoe''': What, and risk my ship?
'''Mal''': I mean it. It's cold out there. And I don't wanna get left. }}
'''Mal''': I mean it. It's cold out there. And I don't wanna get left. }}
* In ''[[Sky High]]'' Will and Ron Wilson, bus driver, have this exchange:
* In ''[[Sky High]]'' Will and Ron Wilson, bus driver, have this exchange:
{{quote| '''Will:''' If I'm not back in 30 minutes...<br />
{{quote|'''Will:''' If I'm not back in 30 minutes...
'''Ron:''' Come in after you!<br />
'''Ron:''' Come in after you!
'''Will:''' ...I was gonna say "get help".<br />
'''Will:''' ...I was gonna say "get help".
'''Ron:''' [crestfallen] Get help. Right. }}
'''Ron:''' [crestfallen] Get help. Right. }}
* ''[[Die Hard]]''. John McClane is talking to his friend Sgt. Al Powell on the radio during the siege:
* ''[[Die Hard]]''. John McClane is talking to his friend Sgt. Al Powell on the radio during the siege:
{{quote| '''McClane:''' Listen, I'm starting to get a bad feeling up here. I want you to do something for me. I want you to find my wife. Don't ask me how. By then you'll know how. I want you to tell her that...Tell her it took me a while to figure out...what a jerk I've been...that when things started to pan out for her...I shoulda been more supportive. And I just should have been behind her more. Tell her that she's the best thing that ever happened to a bum like me. She's heard me say "I love you" a thousand times. She never heard me say "I'm sorry". I want you to tell her that, Al. Tell her that John said that he was sorry.<br />
{{quote|'''McClane:''' Listen, I'm starting to get a bad feeling up here. I want you to do something for me. I want you to find my wife. Don't ask me how. By then you'll know how. I want you to tell her that...Tell her it took me a while to figure out...what a jerk I've been...that when things started to pan out for her...I shoulda been more supportive. And I just should have been behind her more. Tell her that she's the best thing that ever happened to a bum like me. She's heard me say "I love you" a thousand times. She never heard me say "I'm sorry". I want you to tell her that, Al. Tell her that John said that he was sorry.
'''Powell:''' But you can [[Stock Phrases|tell her that yourself]]. You just watch your ass and you'll make it out. You hear me?<br />
'''Powell:''' But you can [[Stock Phrases|tell her that yourself]]. You just watch your ass and you'll make it out. You hear me?<br />
'''McClane:''' I guess that's up to the man upstairs.<br />
'''McClane:''' I guess that's up to the man upstairs.<br />
[Note: Holly Gennaro (McClane's wife) was one of the hostages at the time.] }}
[Note: Holly Gennaro (McClane's wife) was one of the hostages at the time.] }}
* ''[[Outbreak]]'': Sam is racing against time to find and stop [[The Virus]] and knows the odds are against him. He stops to warn his almost ex-wife that the military is making troubling decisions.
* ''[[Outbreak]]'': Sam is racing against time to find and stop [[The Virus]] and knows the odds are against him. He stops to warn his almost ex-wife that the military is making troubling decisions.
{{quote| '''Sam Daniels''': If I'm not back by 1800 hours, and you're not symptomatic -- ''leave''.<br />
{{quote|'''Sam Daniels''': If I'm not back by 1800 hours, and you're not symptomatic -- ''leave''.
'''Robby Daniels''': Wh-what? <br />
'''Robby Daniels''': Wh-what?
'''Sam Daniels''': ''Leave. Town.'' }}
'''Sam Daniels''': ''Leave. Town.'' }}
* Used in ''~9~'', before the titular character goes to {{spoiler|rescue 7 and 8 from The Seamstress}}.
* Used in ''~9~'', before the titular character goes to {{spoiler|rescue 7 and 8 from The Seamstress}}.
{{quote| '''9:''' If I don't come back...destroy [[AI Is a Crapshoot|it]].}}
{{quote|'''9:''' If I don't come back...destroy [[AI Is a Crapshoot|it]].}}
* ''[[Monsters vs. Aliens]]'': "I'll try to come back for you if I can. If I don't, it means I am dead... or late."
* ''[[Monsters vs. Aliens]]'': "I'll try to come back for you if I can. If I don't, it means I am dead... or late."
* ''[[No Country for Old Men]]''.
* ''[[No Country for Old Men]]''.
{{quote| '''Llewelyn''': If I don't come back, tell mother I love her.<br />
{{quote|'''Llewelyn''': If I don't come back, tell mother I love her.
'''Carla Jean''': Your mother's dead, Llewelyn.<br />
'''Carla Jean''': Your mother's dead, Llewelyn.
'''Llewelyn''': Well then I'll tell her myself. }}
'''Llewelyn''': Well then I'll tell her myself. }}
* ''Beethoven'' has this kind of quote when the father goes and check inside the lab, he tells his wife and kids to call the police if he doesn't come back in 15 minutes. His wife later followed him and tells the kids almost the same thing.
* ''Beethoven'' has this kind of quote when the father goes and check inside the lab, he tells his wife and kids to call the police if he doesn't come back in 15 minutes. His wife later followed him and tells the kids almost the same thing.
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== [[Live Action TV]] ==
== [[Live Action TV]] ==
* ''[[Alias (TV series)|Alias]]'' episode "The Box"
* ''[[Alias (TV series)|Alias]]'' episode "The Box"
{{quote| '''Michael Vaughn:''' If I'm not back in a couple of hours, I'm probably dead.}}
{{quote|'''Michael Vaughn:''' If I'm not back in a couple of hours, I'm probably dead.}}
* ''[[One Tree Hill]]'' episode "Every Night Is Another Story"
* ''[[One Tree Hill]]'' episode "Every Night Is Another Story"
{{quote| '''Haley James:''' I saw a gas station about a mile down the road, if I'm not back in an hour, tell my mom I loved her.}}
{{quote|'''Haley James:''' I saw a gas station about a mile down the road, if I'm not back in an hour, tell my mom I loved her.}}
* ''[[Santa Claus Conquers the Martians]]'' on ''[[Mystery Science Theater 3000]]'':
* ''[[Santa Claus Conquers the Martians]]'' on ''[[Mystery Science Theater 3000]]'':
{{quote| '''Voldar:''' Now, if we're not back in three hours, you know what to do.<br />
{{quote|'''Voldar:''' Now, if we're not back in three hours, you know what to do.
'''Tom Servo:''' Go ahead and order without us. }}
'''Tom Servo:''' Go ahead and order without us. }}
* ''[[Bones]]'': Brennan wants to have a baby, and has asked Booth to donate the sperm for artificial insemination. He's ambivalent about it, and eventually says he doesn't want to donate if he won't be involved in raising the child; but when he goes in for Serious Brain Surgery he tells her "If I don't make it, I want you to have my stuff."
* ''[[Bones]]'': Brennan wants to have a baby, and has asked Booth to donate the sperm for artificial insemination. He's ambivalent about it, and eventually says he doesn't want to donate if he won't be involved in raising the child; but when he goes in for Serious Brain Surgery he tells her "If I don't make it, I want you to have my stuff."
* Daniel does this in the première of ''[[Stargate SG-1]].''
* Daniel does this in the première of ''[[Stargate SG-1]].''
** Jack also does it in "The Other Guys", but stops himself before saying exactly what they should do.
** Jack also does it in "The Other Guys", but stops himself before saying exactly what they should do.
{{quote| If we're not back in five minutes... *shrugs*}}
{{quote|If we're not back in five minutes... *shrugs*}}
* Garak has fun with this in the ''[[Star Trek: Deep Space Nine|Star Trek Deep Space Nine]]'' episode "Improbable Cause":
* Garak has fun with this in the ''[[Star Trek: Deep Space Nine|Star Trek Deep Space Nine]]'' episode "Improbable Cause":
{{quote| '''Garak''': If you go into my quarters, and examine the bulkhead next to the replicator, you'll notice there's a false panel. Behind that panel is a compartment containing an isolinear rod. If I'm not back in seventy-eight hours, I want you to take that rod... and ''eat it''.<br />
{{quote|'''Garak''': If you go into my quarters, and examine the bulkhead next to the replicator, you'll notice there's a false panel. Behind that panel is a compartment containing an isolinear rod. If I'm not back in seventy-eight hours, I want you to take that rod... and ''eat it''.
'''Bashir''': Eat it? You're joking. <br />
'''Bashir''': Eat it? You're joking.
'''Garak''': Yes, Doctor. I am. }}
'''Garak''': Yes, Doctor. I am. }}
* ''[[Torchwood]]'': In one episode Gwen, thinking she's about to die, turns to Ianto and says "Tell Jack I l-" only to be cut off when rescue arrives. The only problem is that Ianto is Jack's boyfriend.
* ''[[Torchwood]]'': In one episode Gwen, thinking she's about to die, turns to Ianto and says "Tell Jack I l-" only to be cut off when rescue arrives. The only problem is that Ianto is Jack's boyfriend.
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* In the ''[[Doctor Who]]'' episode "The Satan Pit", the Doctor - while hanging from a wire in a possibly fathomless chasm and planning to cut himself loose - asks Ida to tell Rose... "...Oh, she knows."
* In the ''[[Doctor Who]]'' episode "The Satan Pit", the Doctor - while hanging from a wire in a possibly fathomless chasm and planning to cut himself loose - asks Ida to tell Rose... "...Oh, she knows."
* From the ''[[Star Trek: The Original Series|Star Trek the Original Series]]'' episode "[[Evil Twin|The Enemy]] [[Shirtless Scene|Within]]":
* From the ''[[Star Trek: The Original Series|Star Trek the Original Series]]'' episode "[[Evil Twin|The Enemy]] [[Shirtless Scene|Within]]":
{{quote| '''Kirk:''' "Spock, if this doesn't work..." [beat]<br />
{{quote|'''Kirk:''' "Spock, if this doesn't work..." [beat]
'''Spock:''' [nods once, his eyes downcast] "Understood." }}
'''Spock:''' [nods once, his eyes downcast] "Understood." }}
* In ''[[24]]'' Day 8, a suicide bomber says "Tell my mother that I'm sorry." before he explodes.
* In ''[[24]]'' Day 8, a suicide bomber says "Tell my mother that I'm sorry." before he explodes.
* In ''[[Blackadder]] the Third'' "Nob and Nobility", Edmund, supposedly on his way to [[The French Revolution|Revolutionary France]], leaves Prince George with this touching message:
* In ''[[Blackadder]] the Third'' "Nob and Nobility", Edmund, supposedly on his way to [[The French Revolution|Revolutionary France]], leaves Prince George with this touching message:
{{quote| '''Blackadder''': "If I don't make it back, please write to my mother and tell her that I've been alive all the time, it's just that I couldn't be bothered to get in touch with the old bat."}}
{{quote|'''Blackadder''': "If I don't make it back, please write to my mother and tell her that I've been alive all the time, it's just that I couldn't be bothered to get in touch with the old bat."}}
* ''[[Married... with Children]]'' episode "T*R*A*S*H" had the following conversation:
* ''[[Married... with Children]]'' episode "T*R*A*S*H" had the following conversation:
{{quote| '''Griff''': "If I don't make it, would you look up my ex-wife and..."<br />
{{quote|'''Griff''': "If I don't make it, would you look up my ex-wife and..."
'''Al''': "And tell her that you love her?"<br />
'''Al''': "And tell her that you love her?"
'''Griff''': "No, tell her that she's a bitch!" }}
'''Griff''': "No, tell her that she's a bitch!" }}


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== [[Music]] ==
== [[Music]] ==
* "Bohemian Rhapsody", by [[Queen]].
* "Bohemian Rhapsody", by [[Queen]].
{{quote| ''If I'm not back again this time tomorrow, carry on, carry on.''}}
{{quote|''If I'm not back again this time tomorrow, carry on, carry on.''}}
* From "Rael" by [[The Who]]:
* From "Rael" by [[The Who]]:
{{quote| '''Narrator:'''}}
{{quote|'''Narrator:'''}}
If a yellow flag is fluttering<br />Sickly herald against the morn<br />Then you'll know my courage has ended<br />And you'll send your boat ashore<br />But if a red flag is flying<br />Brazen bold against the blue<br />Then you'll know that I am staying<br />And my yacht belongs to you<br />'''Captain:'''<br />He's crazy if he thinks we're coming back again<br />He's crazy if he thinks we're coming back again<br />He's crazy if he thinks we're coming back again<br />He's crazy, anyway
If a yellow flag is fluttering<br />Sickly herald against the morn<br />Then you'll know my courage has ended<br />And you'll send your boat ashore<br />But if a red flag is flying<br />Brazen bold against the blue<br />Then you'll know that I am staying<br />And my yacht belongs to you<br />'''Captain:'''<br />He's crazy if he thinks we're coming back again<br />He's crazy if he thinks we're coming back again<br />He's crazy if he thinks we're coming back again<br />He's crazy, anyway
* "Die With Honor" by [[Manowar]].
* "Die With Honor" by [[Manowar]].
{{quote| If I do not return<br />
{{quote|If I do not return
Bring my body on my shield<br />
Bring my body on my shield
Tell my son I chose to die<br />
Tell my son I chose to die
[[Last Stand|I chose to die than yield]] }}
[[Last Stand|I chose to die than yield]] }}


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** [[Shout-Out|Went to save my dog.]] If I'm not back in fifteen minutes, Everyone drop everything and come save me. [[Dawn of the Dead 2004|Nicole.]]
** [[Shout-Out|Went to save my dog.]] If I'm not back in fifteen minutes, Everyone drop everything and come save me. [[Dawn of the Dead 2004|Nicole.]]
* ''[[Impossible Creatures]]'':
* ''[[Impossible Creatures]]'':
{{quote| '''[[Awesome McCoolname|Rex Chance]]:''' "If I'm not out in five minutes, save yourself and leave the island. No! Wait, that's silly. If I'm not out in five minutes, come and make sure I haven't locked myself in or something."}}
{{quote|'''[[Awesome McCoolname|Rex Chance]]:''' "If I'm not out in five minutes, save yourself and leave the island. No! Wait, that's silly. If I'm not out in five minutes, come and make sure I haven't locked myself in or something."}}
* If you shot down a air-to-air refuelling tanker in ''Strike Commander'', the pilot would say [[You Bastard|"Tell my wife I--"]]
* If you shot down a air-to-air refuelling tanker in ''Strike Commander'', the pilot would say [[You Bastard|"Tell my wife I--"]]
* [[Vampire: The Masquerade Bloodlines]] gives us a nice little gem in the tutorial.
* [[Vampire: The Masquerade Bloodlines]] gives us a nice little gem in the tutorial.
{{quote| '''Jack:''' Go on through there, and I'll meet you later.<br />
{{quote|'''Jack:''' Go on through there, and I'll meet you later.
'''[[Player Character]]:''' If I'm not back in fifteen minutes, [[Big Trouble in Little China|call the president]]. }}
'''[[Player Character]]:''' If I'm not back in fifteen minutes, [[Big Trouble in Little China|call the president]]. }}


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== [[Western Animation]] ==
== [[Western Animation]] ==
* ''[[Batman and Mister Freeze Sub Zero]]''
* ''[[Batman and Mister Freeze Sub Zero]]''
{{quote| '''Batman:''' If I'm not back in time go without me.<br />
{{quote|'''Batman:''' If I'm not back in time go without me.
'''Robin:''' '''''[[Big "What?"|WHAT!?]]''''' }}
'''Robin:''' '''''[[Big "What?"|WHAT!?]]''''' }}
* ''[[Freakazoid]]:'' If I'm not back in five minutes...''keep waiting''.
* ''[[Freakazoid]]:'' If I'm not back in five minutes...''keep waiting''.
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* In ''[[Daria]]'''s "The Road Worrier", Daria is quietly mortified that she is forced to get out of the van and pee in the woods because of them being stuck in heavy traffic. "If I'm not back in 10 minutes... Don't. Send. Help."
* In ''[[Daria]]'''s "The Road Worrier", Daria is quietly mortified that she is forced to get out of the van and pee in the woods because of them being stuck in heavy traffic. "If I'm not back in 10 minutes... Don't. Send. Help."
* From one episode of the original ''[[Thundercats]]'':
* From one episode of the original ''[[Thundercats]]'':
{{quote| '''Lion-O''' (to Tygra): "If I do not come back, you are the new lord of the Thundercats."}}
{{quote|'''Lion-O''' (to Tygra): "If I do not come back, you are the new lord of the Thundercats."}}
* [[Top Cat]] and the Beverly Hills Cats has this during the scene where they rescue Benny from the dog pound, but argue over gets to go:
* [[Top Cat]] and the Beverly Hills Cats has this during the scene where they rescue Benny from the dog pound, but argue over gets to go:
{{quote| '''Top Cat''': "Never mind, I'll go, but if I'm not back in 10 minutes, take off without me."}}
{{quote|'''Top Cat''': "Never mind, I'll go, but if I'm not back in 10 minutes, take off without me."}}


{{reflist}}
{{reflist}}
Retrieved from "https://allthetropes.org/wiki/If_I_Do_Not_Return"