Jizzed in My Pants/Quotes: Difference between revisions

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{{quote|Stop, or I'l-''ah oh fuck''! Every damn time, ''every damn time''. This sucks... I gotta go put on some new tights, man, this sucks.|'''Stephen Lynch''' as Premature Ejaculator Man}}
{{quote|Stop, or I'l-''ah oh fuck''! Every damn time, ''every damn time''. This sucks... I gotta go put on some new tights, man, this sucks.|'''Stephen Lynch''' as Premature Ejaculator Man}}


{{quote|...''Leave this place, go back to yours,''<br />
{{quote|...''Leave this place, go back to yours,''
''Our lips first touch outside your doors,''<br />
''Our lips first touch outside your doors,''
''The whole night, what we've go in store,''<br />
''The whole night, what we've go in store,''
''Whisper in my ear that you want some more,''<br />
''Whisper in my ear that you want some more,''
''and I [[Title Drop|Jizz. In. My pants.]]''<br />
''and I [[Title Drop|Jizz. In. My pants.]]''<br />
''This really never happens, you can take my word,''<br />
''This really never happens, you can take my word,''<br />
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''Mainly your fault for the way that you dance...''|'''[[The Lonely Island]]''', ''Jizz In My Pants''}}
''Mainly your fault for the way that you dance...''|'''[[The Lonely Island]]''', ''Jizz In My Pants''}}


{{quote|I spilled my drink!<br />
{{quote|I spilled my drink!
I didn't notice you drinking cream there, Sid.|'''[[Viz|Sid the Sexist]]''' and friend at a strip club}}
I didn't notice you drinking cream there, Sid.|'''[[Viz|Sid the Sexist]]''' and friend at a strip club}}


{{quote|The night is alive. Eight blocks away, I hear a couple not washing their hands. Close by, I smell the trace fecal matter on this tight rope. I... I feel every shift of every microfiber in my superpants. Oh... O-'''OHH!'''|'''[[Seanbaby]]''', [http://www.cracked.com/blog/premature-ejaculation-daredevil-why-super-senses-would-suck Premature Ejaculation Daredevil]}}
{{quote|The night is alive. Eight blocks away, I hear a couple not washing their hands. Close by, I smell the trace fecal matter on this tight rope. I... I feel every shift of every microfiber in my superpants. Oh... O-'''OHH!'''|'''[[Seanbaby]]''', [http://www.cracked.com/blog/premature-ejaculation-daredevil-why-super-senses-would-suck Premature Ejaculation Daredevil]}}


{{quote|Superhero: Behold, it is I....'''mindfuck!'''<br />
{{quote|Superhero: Behold, it is I....'''mindfuck!'''
Civilian: What's your power?<br />
Civilian: What's your power?
Mindfuck: I can psychically have sex with '''any woman''' simply by making eye contact with her.<br />
Mindfuck: I can psychically have sex with '''any woman''' simply by making eye contact with her.
Civilian: Holy cow! You can make girls orgasm with a single glance?<br />
Civilian: Holy cow! You can make girls orgasm with a single glance?
Mindfuck: Not ''them''...just me! Otherwise my powers would be revealed!<br />
Mindfuck: Not ''them''...just me! Otherwise my powers would be revealed!
Civilian: So your superpower is ejaculating every time you see a womam?<br />
Civilian: So your superpower is ejaculating every time you see a womam?
Mindfuck: I think you're oversimplifying it.|'''[[Cyanide and Happiness]]''' [http://www.explosm.net/comics/2065/ Strip No. 2065.]}}
Mindfuck: I think you're oversimplifying it.|'''[[Cyanide and Happiness]]''' [http://www.explosm.net/comics/2065/ Strip No. 2065.]}}


{{quote|But whilst her busy hand would guide that part<br />
{{quote|But whilst her busy hand would guide that part
Which should convey my soul up to her heart,<br />
Which should convey my soul up to her heart,
In liquid raptures I dissolve all o'er,<br />
In liquid raptures I dissolve all o'er,
Melt into sperm, and spend at every pore.<br />
Melt into sperm, and spend at every pore.
A touch from any part of her had done't:<br />
A touch from any part of her had done't:
Her hand, her foot, her very look's a cunt.|John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester, "[http://ethnicity.rutgers.edu/~jlynch/Texts/imperfect.html The Imperfect Enjoyment]"
Her hand, her foot, her very look's a cunt.|John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester, "[http://ethnicity.rutgers.edu/~jlynch/Texts/imperfect.html The Imperfect Enjoyment]"
}}
}}
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