Kingdom of Loathing: Difference between revisions

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[[File:leftswordguy.gif|frame]]
 
"Hi, I'm all over [[TVAll The Tropes]]."
 
''[[An Adventurer Is You]]!''
 
'''''The Kingdom of Loathing''''' (2003) is a browser-based [[Massively Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game|MMORPG]] by Zack "Jick" Johnson and Josh "Mr. Skullhead" Nite. The overarching plot of the game, such as it is, involves defeating the aptly-named Naughty Sorceress, who has imprisoned the beloved ruler of the Kingdom, King Ralph XI, in a prism (this is known in-game as his being [[Just for Pun|"imprismed"]]). But first you have to level up your character through the usual rigmarole of [[Fetch Quest|Fetch Quests]], monster hunting, and [[Level Grinding]]. There are several things that make this game fairly unique among [[MMORPG|MMORPGs]], however:
# It is completely free, though donations are accepted, appreciated, and encouraged by the offering of a powerful accessory for a ten-dollar donation, which in turn can be traded for a powerful "item of the month", which is only available for a limited time, but it can also be bought from other players for in-game currency.
 
# The game's graphics consist almost entirely of [[Stylistic Suck|stick figures and other crude black-and-white drawings]].
#It is completely free, though donations are accepted, appreciated, and encouraged by the offering of a powerful accessory for a ten-dollar donation, which in turn can be traded for a powerful "item of the month", which is only available for a limited time, but it can also be bought from other players for in-game currency.
# The game possesses a sense of humor that is at times snarky, scathingly satirical, and loaded with pop culture references, including parodies of other RPGs. For example, the Dungeons of Doom are an homage to the game [[Nethack]], while another zone is the "Penultimate Fantasy Airship", with monsters that take the piss out of [[Square Enix]] games (mainly [[Final Fantasy VII]] and [[Dragon Quest]]).
#The game's graphics consist almost entirely of [[Stylistic Suck|stick figures and other crude black-and-white drawings]].
#The game possesses a sense of humor that is at times snarky, scathingly satirical, and loaded with pop culture references, including parodies of other RPGs. For example, the Dungeons of Doom are an homage to the game [[Nethack]], while another zone is the "Penultimate Fantasy Airship", with monsters that take the piss out of [[Square Enix]] games (mainly [[Final Fantasy VII]] and [[Dragon Quest]]).
 
The last one is the biggest draw of the game for many. For example, the tutorial quest involves doing tasks for a talking bird known as the (wait for it) [[Incredibly Lame Pun|Toot Oriole]]. "''Meat''" is the [[Global Currency|currency of the realm]], simultaneously parodying and justifying the RPG tradition of [[Money Spider|monsters dropping money when defeated]]. Monsters include not only such traditional fantasy fare as goblins, gnolls, and vampires, but also hippies, Orcish frat boys, Ninja Snowmen, ASCII smileys, and zmobies (which are like zombies, except they were misspelled by a magical accident) and a late-game quest involves a long and complex search for a device literally called the Holy [[MacGuffin]]. Then there's the six character classes:
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We could go on (and on and on and on), but why not [http://kingdomofloathing.com experience it for yourself]?
 
----
{{tropenamer}}
== This game is the [[Trope Namer]] for: ==
* [[An Adventurer Is You]]!
* [[Ninja Pirate Zombie Robot]]
* [[Noob Cave]]
 
{{tropelist}}
* [[Abnormal Ammo]]: Pastamancers can cast spells that hit enemies with things like [[Creepy Child|creepy little girls]], [[Kill It with Ice|Ex-girlfriends]], or [[Brown Note|foul language.]]
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** Some of the "ordinary" (loosest possible sense of the word) weapons have this as well. To cite one example, you can build a crossbow which fires ghuolash, which is [[Edible Ammunition|food]] (that is, if you're willing to eat [[I Ate What?|zombie flesh]].)
* [[Absurdly Spacious Sewer]]: Hobopolis.
* [[Added Alliterative AppealAlliteration]]: The three stats are '''M'''uscle, '''M'''ysticality, and '''M'''oxie. Your skill points are called "MP" regardless of what your main stat is, but the meaning changes--Muscularity Points, Mana Points, or Mojo Points.
* [[Aerith and Bob]]: Infernal Rackets, a band playing at Hey Deze arena, comprises Bognort, Stinkface, Flargwurm, and Jim.
* [[The Aggressive Drug Dealer]]: A Suspicious-Looking Guy.
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** Jick has admitted that he didn't know asbestos and chrome where mined when he wrote it.
** The real stuff probably wasn't made by subjecting fire-breathing dragons to the same process that got oil out of dinosaurs, though.
* [[Always ChaoticExclusively Evil]]: Seals.
** There's one seal that you can take and raise as a familiar, but it's still viciously violent, just directed at your enemies instead. So at least they're loyal.
** Bees. They suck. The Guy Made of Bees is even worse.
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** The message given when first entering Azazel's Temple:
{{quote|It's your basic evil hellish demon dwelling: the decorative motifs include blood, pulsating skin, flames, and the occasional throw rug to add some visual interest.}}
* [[Ascended Meme]]: A [http://forums.kingdomofloathing.com/vb/showthread.php?t=182621 silly forum thread] has one player complaining about how one non-combat adventure involving a hippo ballet does not contain an actual picture of a hippo in a tutu. In the next [[Ko L]]KoL convention, [http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Hippo_Ballerina this familiar] was being sold. Also, Jick and Mr.Skullhead put tutus on their forum avatars.
* [[Ass Kicks You]]: You can wear an asshat (made of two bum cheeks). There's a headbutt attack. Go figure.
** Since Crimbo 2010, two new possible monsters have graced the kingdom, along with a photocopier to help provide them. [http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Your_butt Your butt] and [http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Somebody_else%27s_butt somebody else's butt].
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* [[Back-Alley Doctor]]: "Under the Knife" in the obviously-named Sleazy Back Alley is how you can [[Gender Bender|change genders]] in-run.
* [[Beastly Bloodsports]]: There is an adventure in the [[South of the Border]] area where you can bet on a cockfight -- or refuse in disgust: "This flagrant display of cruelty to living creatures disgusts you. [[Hypocritical Humor|You decide to head back to the Icy Peak and eviscerate some more Yetis.]]"
* [[Bee-Bee Gun]]: The Guy Made Of Bees, from a spooooky tale, is summoned Bloody Mary style in [[Big Boo's Haunt|Spookyraven Manor's]] Bathroom. He has approximately the same strength as the monsters in The Naughty Sorceress' Tower, and is killed the same way with a specific item. It is [[Lord British Postulate|possible, albeit extremely difficult]], to kill him in normal combat.
** Simply, the last guy who beat him without the specific item was a Lvl. 117 Pastamancer. It takes maybe 2 years to get to level 100+, unless leveling up is the only thing you care about.
*** Power creep moves on, and now it's possible to kill most of the Gimmick Kill bosses with one donation item and a little bit of [http://forums.kingdomofloathing.com/vb/showthread.php?t=183785 know how].
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** The Haunted Sorority House 2011 Halloween event.
* [[Big Eater]]: Everyone becomes this during the Feast of Boris, gaining doubled eating capacity for the day. Players on the Avatar of Boris path are Big Eaters every day and have numerous eating-related skills, but they also [[Can't Hold His Liquor|get drunk very quickly]].
* [[Bigger Than Jesus]]: One quest sees players have to advertise for a band by pasting fliers to monsters. One of the messages you can get if you go back to the concert arena before you're done advertising says that the band has become "more popular than [[Incredibly Lame Pun|cheeses]]."
* [[Big No]]: "'NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! IT'S NOT POSSIBLE!' you shout, raising your arms to the sky."
* [[Big Red Devil]]: Imps.
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* [[Bindle Stick]]: These drop from hobos in Hobopolis. There are 5 types, one for each element. (And one holiday-event one. And tiny one for your Hobo Monkey.)
* [[Bio Augmentation]]: the Unstable DNA item, which, when drunk, gives the status buff "Yuletide Mutations", which buffs all stats + 50%, the damage of the "Mutant Coture" armor and the potency of "Consume Burrowgrub" for 10 adventures. Unstable DNA is also integral in making the "Pair of Ragged Claws" familiar and the "Burrowgrub Hive" furnishing.
** There is also the [[Gremlins|Gremlin Mutagen]] and the Glowing Syringe ([[Shout-Out|obtained from a big monster in a diving suit with a creepy little girl familiar, natch]]) that "[[BioshockBioShock (series)|Biologically Shocks]]" your DNA.
* [[Bland-Name Product]]: Many examples. BRICKO bricks, Willer beer, and a Red Minotaur energy drink are among them.
* [[Bonus Boss]]: Baron Von Ratsworth, the "Ultra-Rare" monsters that drop the aptly-named [[Captain Obvious|Ultra-Rare items]], Hodgman the Hoboverlord and his Hobopolis Lieutenants, the Mother Slime, the Guy Made of Bees, the list goes on.
* [[Bonus Dungeon]]: Fernswarthy's Basement (infinite in depth; but with special rewards at every 100 levels up to level 500), the various (clan-member-only) raid dungeons, and The Sea (which is only accessible after acquiring the scuba gear in the final dungeon).
** Some dungeons, such as the Palindome (where everything is a palindrome) and Spookyraven Manor (especially the top floor) were optional, before NS13 made them part of the new quests.
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** Also, if you have the meat for it, you can buy various items needed for a quest at the Mall of Loathing without taking the trouble of actually doing the quest. (Unless you're in Hardcore mode, in which the mall, flea market, and your previous inventory are off-limits.)
* [[Brick Joke]]: As a moxie class, one of the tasks required to become a full-fledged guild member is to pickpocket Izzy the Lizard's wallet without him noticing. Later, after you do a task for him, he realizes he can't pay you because someone stole his wallet.
** On January 30, 2010, players could receive for the first time an adventure titled '''From Little Acorns...''', in which you plant an acorn from the evil Underworld Tree in the Arrrboretum. Fast forward to May 6, 2010, when you can get the adventure '''... Grow Unspeakable Horrors''', which gives the {{spoiler|Underworld Bonsai Familiar}}
* [[Bridge]]: Played by the guards behind the light door.
* [[Buffy-Speak]]: A common source of humour. E.g. "Bones scatter across the deck like uh, something that scatters. Mice? I'll go with mice."
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* [[Combat Pragmatist]]: Disco Bandits use enemy weakening attacks in combat, which include suckerpunches, [[Eye Scream|eye pokes]], face-stabs, breaking your opponent's knees, and pretending to run away then attacking when your opponent lets down his guard.
* [[Combat Tentacles]]: The "Mutant Couture" outfit has two seperate sets; the "Parasitic Tentacles" pants and the "Parasitic Strangleworm" off-hand. The pants allow you to trip an enemy, and the off-hand allows you to throttle it.
* [[Commonplace Rare]]: '''Bananas''' are a limited-edition item?!? (They can be duplicated in [[Mad Scientist Laboratory|a certain lab]], but their original source is long gone, and the map that unlocks the lab is a limited item as well.) Don't ask about beets.
** The Dead Guy's Memento item gives you a bunch of extra adventures every day, and it ''seems'' easy enough to get: just combine a very common Dead Guy's Watch with a somewhat-rare, but affordable photograph item. The catch? Instead of gluing them together the normal way, you need to use a ''special piece of tape'' which you ''might'' get from a gambling game in a high-level dungeon (and nowhere else). It's a two-layered [[Commonplace Rare]]!
* [[Companion Cube]]: The [[Portal (series)|Bulky Buddy Box]] familiar, which [[Captain Obvious|does nothing.]] Pet Rocks, Toothsome Rocks, and Holiday Logs are similarly inactive. The latter two's descriptions [[Lampshade]] their uselessness.
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{{quote|Soon, the cavern branches into a smooth, almost glassy-surfaced tunnel -- obviously an ancient lava tube. It appears that you're heading directly into the heart of the volcano. On reflection, this was inevitable, really. I mean, you can't just have a [[Final Boss]] Battle ''near'' a volcano. It would be like having a car chase in which the [[Fruit Cart]] doesn't get knocked over. Or [[They Fight Crime|fighting crime]] in a [[Humongous Mecha|giant robot]] and never using [[Rocket Punch]].}}
** You can even swim through the lava back to shore if you mess up in [[That One Puzzle|the lava maze]], but you'll take a load of damage.
* [[Corrupt Bureaucrat]]: The Council of Loathing are often suspected to be this. See the WMG section.
* [[Cosmetic Award]]: Trophies & tattoos, unless you care about PvP mode.
* [[Crate Expectations]]: Parodied, along with a reference to the Start-To-Crate review system, when crates appear in the first area the player visits. "You're a little nervous about encountering [http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Crate a crate] this early in the game."
** Also parodied by the Barrel Full Of Barrels, which is [[Exactly What It Says on the Tin|a giant barrel full of smaller, smashable barrels]]. Some of the mini-barrels [[Exploding Barrels|explode]].
* [[Creepy Doll]]: Equippable as an Accessory, which adds Spooky damage. Also a Spooky marionette and Killer rag doll shield. You can also get a possessed teddy bear and evil clockwork monkey as familiars.
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** Fumbling causes you to, instead of attacking, take damage by dropping your weapon on yourself. When unarmed, fumbles can be a bit strange, ex. "You drop your forehead on your arse."
* [[Cross Player]]: Many male players play female characters in-game, as there are a few [http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Gender_Differences female-only bonuses]. There's even a trophy for changing your ingame gender 30 times.
* [[Crystal Prison]]: The king has been [[PunA Worldwide Punomenon|imprismed]].
* [[Crystal Skull]]: Well glass skull, but still can scare away monsters.
* [[Cult]]: [[Flying Spaghetti Monster|Spaghetti Cultists]], encountered during the new Nemesis quest if you play as a Pastamancer.
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** "This is a fully rewinged dewinged stab bat." In other words, a stab bat.
* [[Depth Deception]]: Specifically, before the Observatory is destroyed.
* [[The Dev Team Thinks of Everything]]: Subverted in some places, played straight in others. The final boss is only meant to be beatable with {{spoiler|a special wand in your inventory,}} and has massive stats to make sure of this. When someone found a way to do it differently, the developers ''gave them a prize for doing so,'' the description of which said, "Well done for doing something that everyone thought was impossible, and damn you for making us have to work out how to make it not happen again!" Then, ''it happened again.'' (It's good to note at this point that the first player was [[Level Grinding|over level 100,]] And the other had [[Bribing Your Way to Victory|bribed his way there.]]
** Played straight when they gave an Ultra Rare item ([[Luck-Based Mission|which you have a 1 in]] [[Nintendo Hard|no-one-really-knows-at-all chance of getting]]) a resulting material when you pulverize it, making you lose the original item. ''They prepared for people to destroy an Ultra Rare item.'' (The first guy to do it, incidentally, got a [http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Wad_of_Crovacite unique reward] too.)
*** The unique reward he got for pulverizing an ultra-rare item pulverizes into itself. Yes, they prepared for that to.
** Periodically, a holiday on the in-game calendar will fall on the day of an actual real-life holiday. When this happens, the result is usually a clever combination of the two holidays, sometimes even worked into the plot. Thanksgiving on Saint Patrick's Day becomes [http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Drunksgiving Drunksgiving], with drunk versions of Thanksgiving encounters; Halloween on Christmas resulted in the [[Nightmare Before Christmas]] themed [http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Crimboween Crimboween], etc.
** Trying to access the server directory where the image files for trophies are stored simply returns a message:"No peeking."
** [http://forums.kingdomofloathing.com/vb/showpost.php?p=4167363&postcount=6 "Stupid complicated game."]
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* [[Double Entendre]]: There are dozens of these references. Also, there is the Hole in the Sky, where you can fight constellations. The astronomers of that time had very dirty minds, as all but one of the constellations (The [[Shameless Self Promoter|Astronomer]]) are named after various names of the ''Skin Flute'' and the ''Beaver''.
* [[Dracolich]]
* [[The Dragon]]: Each of the villains in the nemesis quest has one of these, who will give you a map to their lair, a unique familiar, and [[Vendor Trash|an item with a nice resale value]] when beaten.
* [[Dual-Wielding]]: The Seal Clubber ability "Double Fisted Skull Smashing" allows the use of two one-handed weapons at once, and the Disco Bandit ability "Ambidextrous Funkslinging" allows the use of two items at once.
* [[Dude, Not Funny]]: Invoked by the "Offensive Joke" ability.
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* [[Elvish Presley]]: Elvish Sunglasses, which give you the "Rock Out" ability. Also, the Elvish effect obtained at the Mysterious Island Arena, if you complete the frat sidequest and pay close enough attention to the music.
* [[Elves vs. Dwarves]]: On the Mysterious Island, as part of a quest from the Council of Loathing, you can start and end war between the smelly, nature-loving hippies and the sleazy, beer-drinking frat boys.
* [[Escort Mission]]: Parodied and thankfully averted with [https://web.archive.org/web/20130303144414/http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Granny%2C_Does_Your_Dogfish_Bite,_Does_Your_Dogfish_Bite%3F Grandma Seamonkey]. She describes herself as someone useless in a fight who would easily get lost and be unable to circumvent the simplest of obstacles. [[Heroic Comedic Sociopath|The player character determines that she should be fine making it back on her own]].
* [[Even Evil Has Standards]]: The pirates may be no-good, thieving, lying brigands, but unlike the frat boys, they would never make people wear some kind of humiliating outfit while cleaning!
* [[Everything Is Better With Monkeys]]: Sock Monkeys, Balloon Monkeys, Rhesus Monkeys, Hobo Monkeys (complete with tiny cigar, hobo vest, a top hat, and the wallet he just stole from you), and monkeys that play cymbals.
** And now the insidious Jocko Homo.
* [[Everything Is's Better Withwith Penguins]]: The Penguin Mafia. In fact, its leader took over Crimbo (the in-game Christmas equivalent) in 2008.
* [[Everything's Better with Princesses]]: Spunky ones wielding titanium assault [[Super Mario Bros.|umbrellas]], and princesses that [[Suspiciously Specific Denial|in no way resemble]] [[Lawyer-Friendly Cameo|Princesses Toadstool and Leia]].
* [[Everything's Worse with Bees|Everything Is Worse With B(ee)s]]: Summer 2011 special challenge: Bees Hate You. Bees attack you every couple of turns, and they want to kill you. Even the ''b''s in any equipment you're wearing. Your character also has a phobia of using items or familiar with a "B" in it.
* [[Everything Trying to Kill You|Everything Trying To Beat You Up]]: There are loads of strange and unusual monsters in this game.
* [[Evil Chef]]: A few of the monsters are examples of this.
* [[Evil Poacher]]: Stella the Turtle Poacher, [[Evil Counterpart|nemesis]] of the Turtle Tamer.
* [[Evil Versus Evil]]: The hippy/frat boy war, for a particularly [[Laughably Evil|ineffective]] brand of "evil". There's a special reward for getting both sides killed. Then again, your contracting body isn't quite unambiguously good either.
* [[Extremely Overdue Library Book]]: The [[Procrastination Giant]] has an extremely overdue library book in his bedroom, the books was so overdue that if it weren't for its bookplate, the player would've thought it predates the invention of libraries.
* [[Eye Poke]]: Disco Eye-Poke is a move in the Disco Bandit's arsenal.
* [[Fantasy Counterpart Culture]]: Canadia (Canada) and South Of The Border (Mexico).
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{{quote|This is the severed flipper of an Infernal Seal. Scientists agree that there is nothing in the world more badass than beating something with a body part you ripped off of something. Of course, if they disagreed, we'd probably rip off their arms and beat them with 'em.}}
* [[Groin Attack]]: The Turtle Tamer ability "Kneebutt".
** Also, one of the many areas randomly targeted by monsters is the groin. The black pudding slaps the female player in the groin with a [[Naughty Tentacles|greasy pseudopod]]. The Burrowing Bishop spins his mitre and charges at you furiously, drilling you in the groin (sleaze damage)!
* [[Grotesque Cute]]: The Adorable Seal Larva familiar is a shining example.
{{quote|''<name> chews its way into the corpse of your fallen opponent in a spray of blood and gristle. Soon, it bursts out of the other side of the carcass, slimes its way up your leg onto your shoulder, and vomits some form of healing bile into your ear. Awww, isn't that just the cutest thing ever?? <3 You gain X hit points. You gain X Mana points.''}}
* [[Guide Dang It]]: A couple NS13 mechanics, particularly [https://web.archive.org/web/20130804130447/http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Monster_levelMonster_Level#Monster_Level_and_Combat_Rate_Modifiers + ML/-NC] one.
** The above mechanic was [[Irony|coincidentally removed in-game ten minutes after its mention was added to this article]].
** Some NS11-era puzzles were also fairly unintuitive without trying to [[Try Everything|combine every item with every other item, or throw combat item after combat item at monsters that fall to only one type of item and horribly murder you otherwise]]. The player base has always had such a high concentration of organized spaders that Jick and Skullhead would be remiss not to leave them something to puzzle out.
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* [[Head Pet]]: Turtle Tamers wear live turtles as helmets.
** The Crown of Thrones lets you carry any familiar on your head.
* [[Heh, Heh, You Said "X"]]: "Huh huh. Poop deck."
* [[Heroic Comedic Sociopath]]: The player character. Sometimes an adventure gives you a choice if you want to act like one, but this is rare.
* [[Holiday Mode]]: Crimbo (for Christmas), which is one disaster after another. 2010 revolves around working for the megacorp that makes Crimbo so safe, it's boring.
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* [[Instrument of Murder]]: The Stolen Accordion, weapon of choice of the Accordion Thief.
** Which, through a special quest, can become the Rock and Roll Legend, and then the Squeezebox of the Ages.
*** Then {{spoiler|The Trickster's Trikitixa once Somerset Lopez is defeated once and for all}}.
** There are also several instruments aside from accordions, including guitars ([http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Heavy_metal_thunderrr_guitarrr one of which is called an "axe"]), drums, flutes, a rattle, a violin, a tuba, and a sitar.
* [[Island Base]]: Your Nemesis has a secret tropical island volcano lair, [[Genre Savvy|just as predicted by your guild leader]].
* [[Joke Item]]: Most of the items from the Summon Hilarious Objects spell.
** Not to mention multiple familiars that ''don't do anything''. Or the ones that only serve to impede you.
** [[Lethal Joke Item]]: Some bosses are only supposed to be killable by using highly improbable inventory items on them. This being [[Ko L]]KoL, some of the players have found alternate methods.
* [[Just Add Water|Just Add Meatpaste]]: Most of the [[Item Crafting]] variants.
* [[Kawaisa]]: the Stuffed Cocoabo.
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* [[The Man]]: It turns out you can fight him, after all.
* [[Marshmallow Dream]]: Referenced in the descriptions of the [http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Comfy_pillow comfy pillow] and [http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Giant_marshmallow giant marshmallow].
* [[Mass Monster Slaughter Sidequest]]: The Bounty Hunter Hunter exists to give out quests of this type.
* [[Meaningful Name]]: There are the chef-in-a-box and bartender-in-a-box, which remove the adventure cost of cooking and making booze. There is no smith-in-a-box, though. The gnoll smith, [[Punny Name|Innabox,]] works as the item would.
* [[Medicine Show]]: Doc Galaktik in Seaside Town runs one of these.
* [[Metaphorgotten]]: "[http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Hellseal_pup This young seal] is nearly ready to leave the brood-nest to be a big shark in its own pond instead of a... piranha... in a small... All right, [[Lampshade Hanging|that metaphor went off the rails pretty fast]]." Probably not the only example out there.
* [[Mid-Battle Tea Break]]: The War Frat 500th Infantrygentleman's fumble message has him drink a martini rather than attack you, because it just so happens to be Cocktail Hour.
* [[Mighty Lumberjack]]: In Little Canadia, the player can encounter lumberjacks, lumberjills, and lumberjuans. The lumberjack supervisor carries ''[[One-Handed Zweihander|two]]'' double-sides axes.
* [[The Missingno]]: Parodies this with the Bugged Bugbear monster, and later its friendlier variant, the Baby Bugged Bugbear familiar. Neither is ''actually'' glitched, but their images have chunks of them replaced with ones and zeroes, they drop inexplicable and bizarre items, and they spit out realistic-looking [[MySQL]] error messages with almost everything they do.
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** In addition, before the Observatory's destruction, players could use it to look into the Sorceress's chamber itself. She would then retaliate with a magical flash of light, causing temporary blindness, and a nearby astronomer would express disapproval of "base voyeurism" [[Hypocritical Humor|while adjusting his polarized sunglasses]].
* [[Naughty Tentacles]]: Invoked when fighting Slime monsters.
{{quote|"It extrudes a pseudopod between your legs, [[All Anime Is Naughty Tentacles|but since this isn't a Japanese cartoon,]] hits you in the (body part) instead." (pain noises)<br />
"It attacks with a mass of tentacles, [[All Anime Is Naughty Tentacles|but you've read enough Manga to know to dodge.]]" }}
* [[Nerf Arm]]: About half of the weapons available are silly yet effective. Especially the ranged weapons. For instance, the most powerful ranged weapons are a vinyl record, a bag of snowballs, and a bag of candy. Heck, even the only two semi-serious max power ranged weapons are pretty silly, one being a rusty speargun found on the bottom of the sea and the other being a bazooka from a fish. In addition, musical instruments both strange and unusual are common ranged weapons. For example, there's the ''little plastic guitar'', which is described as having "[[Guitar Hero|five buttons instead of strings and a little switch you click back and forth instead of strumming]]. It's perfect for those who want to spend hours practicing a musical instrument, without that pesky "able to play music" part at the end." In addition, a fair amount of ''regular'' weapons are silly too. For example, among the most powerful weapons are: A fish stick, a spade from an octopus, and a duct tape sword.
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* [[Non-Appearing Title]]: Referenced by the kingdom's best screaming-crying band, ''Radioactive Child'', and their hit single, '''If You Want to Tell People the Truth, Make Them Laugh, Otherwise They'll Kill You (Royale With Cheese)''. "To show they're clever and hip, screaming-crying bands use famous quotes and pop culture references for their song titles, and make sure that the title never has anything to do with the song."
* [[Non-Human Undead]]: The [[Dracolich|Bonerdagon]].
* [[Notable References to TV Tropes]]: The [http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Tome_of_Tropes Tome of Tropes] Crimbo '10 monster.
* [[Now Where Was I Going Again?]]: Your "Quest Log", which actually is an enchanted log in your camp site.
* [[The Nudifier]]: The Depantsing Bomb.
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* [[108]]: The [[Final Fantasy|PenultimateFantasy]] [[Treasure Chest|chest]] has a base value of 108 meat.
* [[Only the Worthy May Pass]]: Chat channels are only accessible after passing a test given by the Ghost of the English Language. One of the prerequisites needed is an understanding of the proper usage of there/their/they're.
* [[Our Werebeasts Are Different]]: The Weretaco "is an ordinary man, who, when the moon is full, turns into a half-man, half-taco monstrosity. Incidentally, for you detail-oriented people out there -- the weretaco's lycanthropic cycle is not tied to Ronald or Grimace, but to some completely unrelated moon in some completely unrelated alternate dimension. That's why you never see him turn into a human. Seriously."
** The weremoose functions on aboot the same lines, eh?
** There's also the ultra rare Talisman of Baio, which drops from the "Baiowolf", a [[Werewolf]] version of Scott Baio, and increases your stats depending on the phases of the moons.
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* [[Real Life Writes the Plot]]: The "Time Arc", which is the in-game explanation for loss of content due to a database goof; before that, the introduction of the Penguin Mafia as one of the many ways to remove "bugmeat" - excess meat generated by [[Game Breaking Bug|a bug in the system]] - from the economy.
* [[Recursive Reality]]: One mini-dungeon has you shrinking down and battling scabies (skin mites) on ''your own leg''.
* [[Reference Overdosed]]: The game probably contains over a thousand [[Shout-Out|Shout Outs]], of varying degrees of obscurity and subtlety. [https://web.archive.org/web/20150910010521/http://pop.bewarethefgc.com/ There's even a site dedicated to them.]
** [http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Tome_of_Tropes And now they have a reference to us!]
* [[Revive Kills Zombie]]: Using cure items {{spoiler|is the only way to beat your shadow at the end of the game}}.
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* [[Schizo-Tech]]: Everywhere, but particularly the ranged weapons, which include everything from boomerangs to laser cannons to pistols.
** To [[Musical Assassin|guitars]] to sacks of snowballs to ''[[Rule of Funny|beer bongs]]''...
* [[SchrodingerSchrödinger's Gun]]: You can find a treasure chest in [[Alice in Wonderland|The Red Queen's Garden]], but before opening it, you have to solve a chess puzzle. Solving the puzzle more completely causes the chest to have had a better prize placed in it.
* [[Scripted Battle]]: The last form of the Naughty Sorceress.
* [[Self-Deprecation]]: "...then it starts to get all up its own ass with self-referential fourth-wall-breaking, so you know you have to end it."
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* [[Shaped Like Itself]]: "This is a lemon. It's shaped exactly like a lemon."
* [[Shot in the Ass]]: Shooting arrows into someone's arse is the purpose of the [http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Arse-shooting_crossbow Arse-shooting crossbow], a custom item given to one player. This can be done to ''other players'' as well, and it's a [[Status Buff]] for them.
* [[Shout-Out]]: Hundreds. There's [https://web.archive.org/web/20150910010521/http://pop.bewarethefgc.com/ a website] dedicated to cataloguing them.
** Even this site got one in Crimbo 2010!
* [[Shows Damage]]: Ed The "UNDYING!"
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* [[Sinister Scythe]]: gained by getting a Rusty Graverobber's Shovel covered in acidic snot twice. Since it's coated in ick, you get +30% damage from it. Part of a [[Grim Reaper]] costume. Also lampshaded, it's straight-out called "Villainous Scythe."
* [[Zombie Apocalypse|Skeleton Apocalypse]]: The Halloween 2010 event.
* [[Skeleton Key]]: [[PunA Worldwide Punomenon|Made of bones and teeth]].
* [[Slobs Versus Snobs]]: The Mysterious Island War between hippies and frat boys (respectively) certainly has an aspect of this; the slobs are apathetic, though, and the snobs are violent and boorish while still being snobs.
* [[Speak of the Devil]]: Guy Made of Bees.
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* [[Summon Magic]]: Pastamancers can summon "Pasta Guardians", undead creatures with bodies made of - you guessed it - pasta.
* [[Super Reflexes]]: Any character with a high Moxie. The higher it is, the less likely it is that the monster will hit you;there's a point where only a critical hit can touch you.
* [[Suspiciously Specific Denial]]: Uncle P's Antiques:
{{quote|Welcome to our Antique Store, which is absolutely, positively a legitimate establishment, and not a front for any sort of criminal activities.}}
** [[Lampshade Hanging|Lampshaded]] in one of the Arrbour Day adventures:
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* [[Synchronization]]: Inverted in the battle against your shadow. You cannot normally hurt it, but it takes damage equal to the amount of [[Hit Points]] by which you heal yourself.
* [[Take a Third Option]]: At least three: If you want to {{spoiler|get a reward from the Giant in The Strange Leaflet Quest}}, and if you want the best reward for {{spoiler|ending the war between the Hippies and the Frat Boys}}, and if you resolve the turf war between the [[Incredibly Lame Pun|Roller Skates and Ice Skates]], ([[Don't Explain the Joke|two factions of fish obsessed with sporting activities]]), by helping the Skate Board drive both gangs off.
* [[Take That]]: While the game usually veers towards [[Affectionate Parody]], anything that Mr. Skullhead doesn't like will inevitably get one of these.
* [[Take Your Time]]: Don't worry, the Naughty Sorceress never actually does anything. Neither does your Nemesis. In fact, {{spoiler|if you defeat all but his/her/its final [[One-Winged Angel|demonic form]], and then lose to or run away from the demon, you can then proceed to go wherever you want and do whatever you want and come back at leisure - your Nemesis will still be sitting there in demonic form doing nothing until you return}}.
** After you start a war between the Frat Boys and the Hippies, the two armies march out to the battlefield and...just stand there doing nothing indefinitely, until you decide to join the fight. If you fight for only one side, that side will eventually win with zero casualties, because the other side never takes the offensive!
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* [[Trauma Inn]]: Your dwelling at your campground, as well as the Comfy Sofa in your clan rumpus room.
* [[Turtle Power]]: The Turtle Tamer class.
* [[Tropes Will Ruin Your Life]]: As mentioned above, oneOne of the monsters for the 2010 Crimbo is the [http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Tome_of_Tropes Tome of Tropes], a reference to [[TV Tropes|this site]]. Part of the description for the monster reads "every entry contains several references to other cleverly-named tropes... and at some point you look up and see you're eight years older than when you started."
* [[The Undead]]: Every enemy in the Misspelled Cematary and Defiled Crypt, as well as many of the enemies in [[Haunted House|Spookyraven Manor]].
* [[The Un-Reveal]]: The Game Grid had one minigame, [[Super Mario|Jackass Plumber]], which was always "OUT OF ORDER." After a year and a half of this, Crimbo 2011 came around, and players were able to give each other Jackass Plumber consoles as presents. Had the dev team finally gotten around to making the minigame? Well...not exactly. When the gifts became openable, it turned out that the consoles {{spoiler|required nonexistent "Q" batteries. Using the console just makes your character wander around looking for batteries until he/she [[Rage Quit|gets really mad and gives up]]. At least it temporarily boosts your attack power.}}
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** In the Turtle Tamer Nemesis quest, one is attacked by "brainwashed" guard turtles. One of their drops is their shell. "So you killed a turtle, ripped the shell from its back, and now you're going to wear it on your head. As a hat. Some Turtle Tamer you are. Damn."
** Three of the five hit messages for attacking with a chefstaff, which really isn't a very effective weapon for hitting things with, tell you outright that it would be a better idea to use it for casting spells than as a bludgeon.
*** Which is hilarious when you're doing tens or hundreds of times the monster' s HP in damage anyway.
** You can pickpocket the Guy Made Of Bees, and thus receive a handful of bees. The item description is shocked that you were insane enough to do this in the first place.
** True [http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/The_Whole_Kingdom the whole kingdom can't really hurt] you but that's no reason to be a jerk about it!
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** Also, you need to get a skill called [[Whatevermancy|Tempuramancy]] to learn how to ''deep fry.''
*** That is, learning to deep fry in ''a thermal vent on the ocean floor''.
** Similarly, Pastamastery is necessary to cook simple ramen dishes, even though lots of more complex cookings don't require any skills.
** A [http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/A_Crimbo_Carol,_Ch._1 Crimbo skill] teaches you how to eat too much over the holidays and get fat.
* [[You Shouldn't Know This Already]]: The recipe system lets you try to combine different ingredients to make new items. If you attempt a legitimate combination, the recipe is added to your recipe book forever. If your combination doesn't do anything, it tells you so, and neither of the ingredients are consumed. However, some recipes only work if you currently have a particular skill, like pastamastery, and if you lose that skill, it won't let you use the recipe, even though it's in your recipe book. Furthermore, a handful of recipes can only be used if you've already learned the recipe from a specific source. For example, white chocolate chip brownies can only be made after you use the special item "mother's secret recipe". Trying to cook the ingredients otherwise yields the message "It seems like that should work... but it does not."
 
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