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*** ''Unauthorized feeding of Metroids is STILL strictly prohibited.''
** Read the Pirate Logs in the Phazon Mines [[Mook Horror Show|discussing Samus]]. For further hilarity, in ''Echoes'', they notice [[Evil Twin|Dark Samus]], [[Oh Crap|and ''then'' they realize that there are two of you.]]
{{quote| "Truly, we are cursed."}}
** A Pirate Log about the Pirates' [[Body Horror|attempt to replicate the Morph Ball]] [[Crosses the Line Twice|manages to become funny]].
{{quote| ''"Aran's Power Suit technology remains a mystery, especially the curious Morph Ball function. All attempts at duplicating it have ended in disaster: four test subjects were horribly broken and twisted when they engaged our Morph Ball prototypes. Science Team wisely decided to move on afterward."''}}
* After finally defeating the Chykka, a boss that just keeps getting back up when it seems defeated, scanning the corpse will give you a long list of information about the body's condition that basically amounts, "Yeah, it's down for good now, don't worry."
* [[Metroid Prime]]: After the battle with Thardus, as Samus is turning to walk away, a small rock smacks her in the back of the head. (It conveniently makes her turn around and see a brand-new powerup!)
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** Samus also gets a few dozen [[Crowning Moment of Awesome|CMoAs]] for STILL BEATING HIM A BUNCH.
* Some of the Prime 3 Pirate logs.
{{quote| ''"After our liberation, she (Dark Samus) left us adrift. We thought this a test of our loyalty, and so we endured. Some said she abandoned us. They were promptly shot. Disciples do not doubt their leader. "''}}
* "Hey, relax. We're the good guys. 'Justice will prevail', and [[Buffy-Speak|all that stuff]], right Samus?"
 
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