Mort/Quotes: Difference between revisions

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{{quote|"It would seem that you have no useful skill or talent whatsoever," he said. "Have you thought of going into teaching?"}}

 

{{quote|Only one creature could have duplicated [[Oh Crap|the expressions on their faces]], and that would be a pigeon who has heard not only that Lord Nelson has got down off his column but has also been seen buying a 12-bore repeater and a box of cartridges.}}

 

{{quote|"My granny says that dying is like going to sleep," Mort added, a shade hopefully.

{{smallcaps|I wouldn't know. I have done neither.}} }}

 

{{quote|"Pardon me for living, I'm sure."

{{smallcaps|No-one gets pardoned for living.}} }}

 

{{quote|Although [[Sinister Scythe|the scythe]] isn't pre-eminent among the weapons of war, anyone who has been on the wrong end of, say, a peasants' revolt will know that in skilled hands it is fearsome.}}

 

{{quote|The only things known to go faster than ordinary light is monarchy, according to the philosopher Ly Tin Weedle. He reasoned like this: you can't have more than one king, and tradition demands that there is no gap between kings, so when a king dies the succession must therefore pass to the heir ''instantaneously''. Presumably, he said, there must be some elementary particles -- kingons, or possibly queons -- that do this job, but of course succession sometimes fails if, in mid-flight, they strike an anti-particle, or republicon. His ambitious plans to use his discovery to send messages, involving the careful torturing of a small king in order to modulate the signal, were never fully expanded because, at that point, the bar closed.}}

 

{{quote|{{smallcaps|I don't know about you}}, he said, {{smallcaps|But I could murder a curry.}}}}

 

{{quote|Poets have tried to describe Ankh-Morpork. They have failed. Perhaps it's the sheer zestful vitality of the place, or maybe it's just that a city with a million inhabitants and no sewers is rather robust for poets, who prefer daffodils and no wonder.}}

 

{{quote|It is a fact that although the Death of the Discworld is, in his own words, an {{smallcaps|Anthropomorphic Personification}}, he long ago gave up using the traditional skeletal horses, because of the bother of having to stop all the time to wire bits back on.}}

 

{{quote|Ankh-Morpork had dallied with many forms of government and had ended up with that form of democracy known as One Man, One Vote. The Patrician was the Man; he had the Vote.}}

 

{{quote|{{smallcaps|I ushered souls into the next world. I was the grave of all hope. I was the ultimate reality. I was the assassin against whom no lock would hold.}}

"Yes, point taken, but do you have any particular skills?" }}

 

{{quote|"''Sodomy non sapiens''."}}

 

He stopped talking. }}

 

{{quote|"You like it?" he said to Mort, in pretty much the same tone of voice people used when they said to St George, "You killed a ''what''?"|On [[Gargle Blaster|scumble]]}}

He remembered the loneliness."|Mort remembering how it's like to be Death (Note: Death 'putting the chairs on the tables' at the end of time is mentioned later in ''[[The Sandman]]'', probably a [[Shout-Out]].)}}