Russian Humour: Difference between revisions

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** ''Seventeen Moments of Spring'' was re-released in color later. This led to a few new Stirlitz jokes, centered on colors. Here's one.

*** "Stirlitz was surprised to see so many colored people serving in the Gestapo".

** Stirlitz wakes up to find out he has been arrested. "Who got me? Which name should I use?" - he wonders. - "Let's see. If they wear black uniforms, I'll say I'm Standartenführer Stirlitz. If they wear green uniforms, I'm Colonel Isayev". The door opens and a man in a blue uniform<ref>The uniform colours correspond to SS, Soviet military, and Soviet police.</ref> comes in saying: "You really should ease up on the vodka, Comrade Tikhonov<ref>[[Vyacheslav Tikhonov]] is the actor who played Stirlitz</ref>!"

** Stirlitz wakes up to find out he has been arrested. "Who got me? Which name should I use?" - he wonders. - "Let's see. If they wear black uniforms, I'll say I'm Standartenführer Stirlitz. If they wear green uniforms, I'm Colonel Isayev". The door opens and a man in a blue uniform<ref>The uniform colours correspond to SS, Soviet military, and Soviet police.</ref> comes in saying: "You really should ease up on the vodka, Comrade Tikhonov!<ref>[[Vyacheslav Tikhonov]] is the actor who played Stirlitz</ref>"

* Vasily Ivanovich Chapayev. He was a Red Army hero of the Russian Civil War, in the rank of Division Commander (roughly equivalent of [[Modern Major-General|Major General]]), and was featured in a [[Very Loosely Based on a True Story]] and hugely popular 1934 biopic by Furmanov (who was savvy enough and catered to the demand for boisterous [[Attack! Attack! Attack!]] tall tales). Other characters from the biopic like his [[The Lancer|aide-de-camp]] Petka, Anka [[Action Girl|The Machine-Gunner]], and [[The Political Officer|political commissar]] Furmanov were also featured in the jokes. Most common topics are about their fight with the White Army, Chapayev's futile attempts to enroll into the Frunze Military Academy, his folk-cunning and his incompetence in book military science, and the circumstances of his death; Officially and in the book, he was machine-gunned by the Whites while attempting to flee across the Ural River after a lost battle.

** "I flunked again, Petka. The question was about Caesar, and I told them it's a stallion from the 7th cavalry squadron." / "Oh, sorry about that, Vasily Ivanovich, I had him moved to the 6th!"

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'''Rabinovich''': Great! Could you tell me where I might get my share? }}

* Vovochka (a diminuitive form of "Vova", itself, in turn, a diminutive form of "Vladimir"). A stereotypical Russian [[Ordinary High School Student|school student]] (depending on the story, his age may vary from kindergarten to high school): not too bright, not interested in studying, either, prone to underage drinking, smoking, and swearing. Think [[The Simpsons|Bart Simpson]], only sometimes worse. He's apparently a subversion of young Vladimir Lenin, who was a role model character in many didactic tales for children. His most common counterpart is Marivanna <ref>shortened of "Maria [[Patronymic|Ivanovna]]"</ref>, a stereotypical Russian schoolmarm, whose portrayal varies from sympathetic to outright offensive. Ever since [[Vladimir Putin]] got elected President, the joke-tellers went meta and started considering Vovochka anecdotes political jokes.

* Vovochka (a diminuitive form of "Vova", itself, in turn, a diminutive form of "Vladimir"). A stereotypical Russian [[Ordinary High School Student|school student]] (depending on the story, his age may vary from kindergarten to high school): not too bright, not interested in studying, either, prone to underage drinking, smoking, and swearing. Think [[The Simpsons|Bart Simpson]], only sometimes worse. He's apparently a subversion of young Vladimir Lenin, who was a role model character in many didactic tales for children. His most common counterpart is Marivanna,<ref>shortened of "Maria [[Patronymic|Ivanovna]]"</ref> a stereotypical Russian schoolmarm, whose portrayal varies from sympathetic to outright offensive. Ever since [[Vladimir Putin]] got elected President, the joke-tellers went meta and started considering Vovochka anecdotes political jokes.

** The teacher asks the class to produce a word that starts with the letter "A"; Vovochka happily raises his hand and says "Asshole!" The teacher, shocked, responds "For shame! There's no such word!" "That's strange," says Vovochka, "the asshole exists, but the word doesn't!"