Sarcastic Confession: Difference between revisions

Remember, kids, it isn't lying if you tell the truth in a sarcastic tone of voice!

Simple: Tell the truth, but in such a way that no one will believe it. Then not only will you get them off your case, but if they actually run into the truth one day, they'll [[Cassandra Truth|reject it out of hand]].

'''Asuka:''' [[Visible Silence|...]]<br />

'''Rei:''' Am I... in error? }}

** Kyon uses Sarcastic Confessions many more times in the same fic, including the following gem (to {{spoiler|Sasaki, the resident [[Agent Scully]]}}):

{{quote| {{spoiler|Let's see ... I have to have a conversation with past instances of several people, rescue an heiress from twelve boryokudan thugs, arrange for an alien artifact to be delivered, and ... hum, tomorrow is Tuesday, so I really should [[Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking|study for that math test, too.]]}}}}

* In the ''[[Rurouni Kenshin]]'' fanfic ''[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4754499/1/To_See_You_Again To See You Again]'', when Yuriko's parents demand to know what's been going on for the past forty chapters or so, she says, {{spoiler|"[Kenshin] came through a [[Time Travel|time-warp]], and I'm the [[Reincarnation]] [[Reincarnation Romance|of his wife]]."}} plus {{spoiler|"I mean, he's not like a hundred and fifty!"}} Of course, this is exactly what happened. {{spoiler|Yuriko's father actually figured out it was the truth by the epilogue. He was cool with it}}.

* In the ''[[Harry Potter]]'' [[Peggy Sue]] fanfiction ''[[Oh God Not Again (Fanfic)|Oh God, Not Again]]'', Harry constantly tells the truth about how he knows certain things, stating specifically that no one would believe the truth anyway.

* At one point in the ''[[Danny Phantom]]'' fic ''[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5491874/7/Ghost_Zone_Experience Ghost Zone Experience]'', Maddie angrily tells Danny (when he's in his [[Secret Identity|ghost form]]) not to swipe their ghost hunting equipment (again). After [[Beat|a moment]], he cheekily replies with "Yes, mother."

* [[Yet Again|A quick snippet between Yugito and A.]]

* In ''[[Red Eye (Film)|Red Eye]]'', there was a minor case of this. Jackson Rippner is very unhappy about his [[Names to Run Away From Really Fast|meaningful name...]]

{{quote| '''Lisa:''' That wasn't very nice of your parents.<br />

** The dialogue first third of that film is almost entirely composed of [[Sarcastic Confession|Sarcastic Confessions]], until he makes it clear he's not joking.

* Cardinal Richelieu does this in ''The Three Musketeers'' (1993). King Louis tells the Cardinal that he's heard rumors that he is planning to betray him. Richelieu responds:

* Sometimes used in ''[[Bones]]'', confusing Dr. Brennan.

* In ''[[Alias Smith and Jones (TV)|Alias Smith and Jones]]'', Heyes and Curry find themselves accidentally impersonating two of the agents who are supposed to catch them. Another agent realizes they're not who they say they are and asks their real names. Heyes promptly says, "Hannibal Heyes and Kid Curry", and the agent assumes they just don't want to tell him who they really are.

** {{spoiler|At the end of season three, Tyrol actually is revealed as a Cylon. So Cavil wasn't right after all. Of course, the final five explicitly are said to be not like normal [[Artificial Human|humanoid models]], and the others are explicitly not even supposed to think about them, so Cavil really ''hasn't'' seen them at the meetings.}}

*** And then that's double-subverted when we find out {{spoiler|Cavil knew who and ''what'' Tyrol was the entire time, since the Final Five ''created'' Cavil and the other "skinjobs", Cavil went [[Ax Crazy]], murdered the Final Five, had them Boxed upon resurrection, then let them out brainwashed just in time to witness the Colonial Holocaust...which the Final Five tried to avert forty years earlier. Messing with Tyrol was just part of his personal enjoyment of the whole thing, as he was the only being in existence who knew the truth.}}

* From ''[[Pushing Daisies]]'':

{{quote| '''Olive:''' Are you and the pie-maker in some kind of cahoots together?<br />

'''Olive:''' If you don't want to tell me, just say so. }}

* In ''[[Gossip Girl]]'' after Blair {{spoiler|loses her virginity to Chuck}}, her on-again-off-again boyfriend Nate has the following conversation with Chuck, who is also Nate's best friend:

* In the 3rd season premiere of ''[[Breaking Bad]]'', brother-in-law and DEA agent Hank is helping Walter move out of his home after a falling out with his wife. One black duffel bag is heavy, and Walter isn't supposed to do any heavy lifting. Hank insists, and feels the heft. "What have you got in there, cinder blocks?" Without a drop of [[Irony]], Walter replies, "Half a million dollars in cash." Hank only chuckles and says, "That's the spirit," not realizing that Walter actually does have half a million dollars in cash that he obtained by selling crystal meth.

** In a later episode, Hank is going through {{spoiler|Gale's lab notes}} and begins wondering who this "W.W." person is whom he praises. After joking that it might stand for Walter White, a nervous Walt puts his hands up and sarcastically says "All right, you got me.".

* In ''[[The Office]]'', a series of suspicious mouse-clicks and taps leads Dwight to believe that Jim and Pam are talking about him behind his back in Morse code. Jim says, sarcastically, that yes, new parents Jim and Pam used their very limited time and money to learn Morse code specifically to mess with Dwight.

{{quote| '''Jim:''' ''(later, in interview)'' Yep, that's ''exactly'' what we did.}}

'''Fraser''': I'd rather not say. }}

* Played with in the original pilot of ''[[Hogan's Heroes]]'': The crew's certain a new inmate is a spy and are trying to figure out what to do about him. Hogan decides to actually SHOW HIM their underground hideout. They blindfold him, walk him around the camp to the trap door and use a fake [[You Just Told Me]] to convince him they're under the water tower. [[Hilarity Ensues]] when the agent runs to his superiors, rambling about a counterfeit money press, a tailor forging Nazi uniforms, and a small factory that makes gun-shaped cigarette lighters - his "lighter" was swapped for an actual gun, and his attempts to trigger the trapdoor lead to him being doused in gallons of water. The other Germans think he's nuts.

{{quote| '''Jenna:''' You wouldn't be trying to get rid of me, would you?<br />

'''Avon:''' I have to get rid of Blake first. You're next on my list.<br />

{{quote| '''Evaluator:''' Do you ever hear voices?<br />

'''Feynman:''' Yeah. I can hear a few right now. }}

* Uncommon but effective in Poker. Simply announcing the real contents of your hand is a good luring tactic because everyone will dismiss it outright as a bluff. Even more effective if you show them afterwards because the next time, your opponent will [[Mind Screw|think twice]].

* There is a story about a Jewish sympathizer in Nazi Germany who was hiding Jews in her home. When the police came by and questioned her as to whether there were any fugitives in her house, she answered [[Crowning Moment of Awesome|"Yes there are, under my kitchen table!"]] Since there was obviously nobody under her kitchen table, they figured she was crazy and left. They did not check for the trapdoor under the rug under the kitchen table.

** And it was the sister's young daughter who told the truth. She wasn't being sarcastic - her family in usual circumstances just put a high value on honesty.

* Someone known to be a [[Deadpan Snarker]] has a much higher chance of pulling it off since scathing sarcasm is their usual way to respond to almost anything.

{{reflist}}

[[Category:Oh Great a Snark Index]]

[[Category:Sarcastic Confession]]