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* Another thing I've noticed about Time Lords is that they tend to [[Insufferable Genius|think very highly of themselves]], they [[No Indoor Voice|scream a lot]], and they [[Fruit of the Loon|like bananas]]... hmm...
* So this means the entire audience and the production staff are his companions! Wow...
* This is getting hard to ignore. An hour ago as of this posting, Stephen posted the following on his Twitter [[Twitter|(StephenAtHome)]]:
** {{smallcaps| '''Sometimes I wish I had two hearts, ''' }} {{smallcaps| so I could wear one on my sleeve to show people my feelings without dying.}}
* In [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/393044/july-25-2011/brian-cox this interview] he casually suggested that he might be from 500 years in the future.
* When Colbert is re-recieving the SuperPac powers from [[Jon Stewart]], it [http://mswyrr.tumblr.com/post/16810815243/coincidence-i-think-not-cheap-special-effects looks an awful lot like he's regenerating]. Coincidence? I THINK NOT!
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== Stephen is psychic. == The DaColbert Code (five completely accurate Oscar picks using nothing more than random 'Six Degrees Of Kevin Bacon' reasoning) is just the latest example. On [http://www.thedailyshow.com/video/index.jhtml?videoId=111816&title=2000-Election-Coverage Election Night 2000], he predicted "unwinnable war" and a "downward spiral" for whoever was elected. And we all know how that turned out. This has worrying implications for his statements about the Rapture and the [[Zombie Apocalypse]].
* Although it seems he isn't entirely aware of his precognitive powers, because in a recent installment of The DaColbert Code he kept somehow predicting Barack Obama would become President even when deliberately using clues that would lead to McCain.
** The most recent The DaColbert Code for the 2009 Oscars was also completely accurate, giving more credence to Stephen's psychic powers.
** He was predicting people throwing shoes at President Bush [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/181508/january-31-2006/all-you-need-to-know---samuel-alito as early as January 2006].
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== The 'real' Stephen is fake, and the 'fake' Stephen is real ==
The Stephen Colbert of [[
* Also, an attempt to run for President without any political experience is exactly what a satirical character would do - but Colbert was running as a Democrat.
* Apparently there's been a study that shows Colbert has conservative fans who believe exactly that: he "only pretends to be joking".
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* [[Weirdest Inbound Link of the Day|Confirmed!]]
* "Don't worry, in movies you can always [[Outrun the Fireball|outrun the fireball.]]"
* "''2012''. The Mayans warned us. Assuming, they warned us one day that computer graphics would strip movies of any plot or characterization and turn them into [[Tropes Are Not Good|mindless]] orgies of [[
* One of his favorite ways of messing with us may be reading these theories about him and [[
== Stephen is being mind-controlled by Marik from [[Yu-Gi-Oh!:
He is being made to brainwash America through his television show. His fans have shown a creepy tendency to do whatever he says; if Marik makes Stephen to tell his fans to do something, they'll do it. Thus, Marik can enslave all of America. And his name is Steve.
* No silly, Stephen IS Marik from [[Yu-Gi-Oh!:
== Stephen is [[The Bible|the Second Coming.]] ==
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== Stephen is a wizard. ==
This is how he is able to store all that stuff (up to and including '''two Starbucks''') under his desk, and why he can communicate with ghosts. It's also why he doesn't doubt in the supernatural. Abraham Lincoln's skull is a magical artifact he uses in his rituals.
* Better version, he's ''the'' wizard. [[A Wizard Did It|The one who did it]]. That's right, he's [[8-Bit Theater
* [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/265496/march-04-2010/health-care-magic Confirmed!]
{{quote|
== Colbert isn't really a Republican. ==
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* That's ridiculous, Colbert wears glasses! And, uh...hmm.
== Sweetness talking is a long-running gag by ''[[
They had a remote-frequency hearing aid powered by one of those tiny, movement-recharged power cells inserted into his deaf (or deafened) ear, and whisper into it whenever he is holding the gun. Fortunately, their plan to get him to [[I Just Shot Marvin in
== Colbert is actually reasonably conservative, ==
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== Stephen is already on a team for the 2010 Winter Olympics ==
It's just a secret and wont be revealed until he tries out for the sport he's actually competing in.
* Called it? Maybe? We don't actually know when he 'joined the speed skating team', but...
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Ever seen those petitions to have Stephen Colbert voice America from ''[[Axis Powers Hetalia]]?'' He won't have to since he's pretty much Alfred in a dyed wig. I mean, he's hyper, brash, uber-patriotic and loves burgers and apple pie. He got his hatred of bears from a bad visit to Canada.
== Stephen got his hatred of bears by playing [[Banjo
...Nope, me either.
* The biggest problem with this is that [[Banjo
== We are all [[Everyone Is Jesus in Purgatory|Stephen Colbert in Purgatory]]. ==
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Conceived in the TARDIS, Colbert is the child of a Timelord and America, but because he was conceived in the TARDIS, and thusly near a time vortex, he has the traits of a timelord while still being the child of a nation. Also, because he ''is'' the child of a nation, he has an innate need to ''be'' a nation- hence the title of his website as Colbert'''nation'''.
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[[Category:Wild Mass Guessing/Live Action TV]]
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