The Order of the Stick/WMG/Jossed: Difference between revisions

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=== This is a page for theories about ''[[~~The Order of the Stick (Webcomic)|~~The Order of the Stick]]'' that have been [[Jossed]] by the strip or [[Word of God|Word of the Giant]]. Please move any [[The Order of the Stick ~~(Webcomic)~~/WMG|open theories]] to here if they are jossed. ===

=== This is a page for theories about ''[[The Order of the Stick]]'' that have been [[Jossed]] by the strip or [[Word of God|Word of the Giant]]. Please move any [[The Order of the Stick/WMG|open theories]] to here if they are jossed. ===

== Nale retreated to his hometown of Greysky City after leaving Azure City, and Haley will have to fight him and/or work with him to resurrect Roy/escape the city. ==

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== Vaarsuvius is divorced. ==

Despite claiming to be married, Vaarsuvius goes adventuring for months at a time and never makes any attempt to contact his or her spouse, even when imprisoned for a capital crime. He or she is also reluctant to discuss the marriage. Therefore, the couple have gone through an ugly divorce and broken off all contact.

* One needs to consider an elven perception of time. They are obscenely long-lived creatures at an average "retirement age" of 650 years (''AD&D'' Elves don't die of old age, they just "[[Put On a Bus|go away]]"). So, regardless of how long it's been to the other party members, for Vaarsuvius it's the equivalent of a weekend camping trip. Not to mention, humans are amazed at a marriage that lasts 50 years; think how tired you would get of someone if you were together continually for 500 years. Long periods apart are also listed in the 2nd Ed. ''Elves Handbook'' as a way of rekindling an Elven couples love for one another.

* One needs to consider an elven perception of time. They are obscenely long-lived creatures at an average "retirement age" of 650 years (''AD&D'' Elves don't die of old age, they just "[[Put on a Bus|go away]]"). So, regardless of how long it's been to the other party members, for Vaarsuvius it's the equivalent of a weekend camping trip. Not to mention, humans are amazed at a marriage that lasts 50 years; think how tired you would get of someone if you were together continually for 500 years. Long periods apart are also listed in the 2nd Ed. ''Elves Handbook'' as a way of rekindling an Elven couples love for one another.

* Based on the above, Vaarsuvius is female, and her ex-husband is Thief from ''[[8-Bit Theater (Webcomic)|8-Bit Theater]]''. She left him because he shunned her abilities as a caster to a "pocket universe" wherein she can develop her skills and prove to her husband she's actually useful. That explains why she gets so angry when she fails in her attempt to scry for Roy, her secrets and her bending morals. This is also why Thief refuses to speak about his wife, and often mocks Red and Black Mage for being "casters".

** This would also explain why Vaarsuvius seems to get along so well with Haley compared to the rest of the party -- she reminds her of dear, sweet Thief!

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== Roy's spirit will have no choice but to take over Belkar's body ==

Eventually V. is going to [[Mind Rape]] Belkar into being a vegetable. At this point, Roy will have to possess Belkar's body in order to stop V. from wiping out the party. Following this, he will find a non-psycho arcanist (preferably a sorcerer) and arrange for a ''polymorph any object'' spell to give him back his Medium-sized frame. The only problem is how depressing this WMG is, unless Belkar is able to exploit some loophole and [[Person As Verb|pull a Greenhilt]] as a spirit.

Eventually V. is going to [[Mind Rape]] Belkar into being a vegetable. At this point, Roy will have to possess Belkar's body in order to stop V. from wiping out the party. Following this, he will find a non-psycho arcanist (preferably a sorcerer) and arrange for a ''polymorph any object'' spell to give him back his Medium-sized frame. The only problem is how depressing this WMG is, unless Belkar is able to exploit some loophole and [[Person as Verb|pull a Greenhilt]] as a spirit.

== Something awesome involving fiends will happen exactly on Strip 666 ==

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== Vaarsuvius will use his [[Deal ~~With~~ the Devil]] as an opportunity to bring Roy to Durkon ==

== Vaarsuvius will use his [[Deal with the Devil]] as an opportunity to bring Roy to Durkon ==

S/he'll use her greater wizarding abilities to find out where Roy's corpse is and get it back, and use Qarr's teleportation ability to bring Roy's corpse to Durkon. Besides, he needs to be raised already.

* V. doesn't ''need'' to. S/he knows Wish. S/he now has enough caster levels to perform epic spells. S/he can presumably use some kind of epic Wish variant to bring Roy back without needing to even ''think'' about Durkon.

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== The Creature In The Darkness Is The Bonus Boss Of A JRPG. ==

* Think about it: Insanely overpowered, able to perform attacks that should be impossible in a D and D universe, and unlike every other creature in the Order Of The Stick universe, HE HAS NO IDEA HOW THINGS ACTUALLY WORK!!! Every other creature, even admittedly idiotic ones, possess full awareness of the abilities of both themselves and others. The Creature In The Darkness does not, because he's not from this universe, but instead he is a creature that came from a universe that operates on a completely different set of rules. And which [[Bonus Boss]]? [[Arc the Lad ~~(Video Game)~~|Choko actually seems kinda likely.]]

* Think about it: Insanely overpowered, able to perform attacks that should be impossible in a D and D universe, and unlike every other creature in the Order Of The Stick universe, HE HAS NO IDEA HOW THINGS ACTUALLY WORK!!! Every other creature, even admittedly idiotic ones, possess full awareness of the abilities of both themselves and others. The Creature In The Darkness does not, because he's not from this universe, but instead he is a creature that came from a universe that operates on a completely different set of rules. And which [[Bonus Boss]]? [[Arc the Lad|Choko actually seems kinda likely.]]

== V's Master is also his/her mother/father ==

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== V's prophecy hasn't come true yet. ==

The exact wording is that Vaarsuvius will achieve complete and total ultimate arcane power, quote, "By saying the right four words to the right being at the right time for all the wrong reasons." The problem is that ''none'' of these conditions were met. V said "I... I must succeed," which isn't four words (it's three, with a stammer). V says it to ''three'' beings, not one being. It wasn't the right "time"--time was frozen during the bargaining session, so there was no "time" at all. And V doesn't do it for ''all'' the wrong reasons: V's children and spouse were under threat of being murdered in an inordinately gruesome fashion--pride was ''a'' reason to do it, but not ''all'' of them. In fact, Vaarsuvius didn't even achieve "complete and total ultimate arcane power." As Xykon noted, V only acquired the power of three magicians who were too weak to stay in the game, and thus, not ultimate; the Soul Splice was fairly easily broken, and thus, not complete.

* Except that "I(1)...I(2) must(3) succeed(4)" is 4 words. Count them again. And V didn't say them to the Three Fiends, he said them to himself in an attempt to justify his [[Deal ~~With~~ the Devil]] when given a hypothetical alternative solution (that it would not have actually worked out for him is irrelevant; he didn't know that at the time). This makes it "for the wrong reason"--V wanted to prove that pure arcane power could solve any problem, and the one fiend specifically calls him on this by pointing out that it would mean he was wrong. V did it out of pride--the wrong reason. The right time was just as the Time Stop was fading, and he had little choice to think of an alternate plan (or, to think through the proffered plan). V received "ultimate arcane power" and lost it. Xykon even calls him on this, pointing out that all his power is for naught as it is still "shackled to your lame mid-level ass." There is no question that the terms of the prophecy have been met.

* Except that "I(1)...I(2) must(3) succeed(4)" is 4 words. Count them again. And V didn't say them to the Three Fiends, he said them to himself in an attempt to justify his [[Deal with the Devil]] when given a hypothetical alternative solution (that it would not have actually worked out for him is irrelevant; he didn't know that at the time). This makes it "for the wrong reason"--V wanted to prove that pure arcane power could solve any problem, and the one fiend specifically calls him on this by pointing out that it would mean he was wrong. V did it out of pride--the wrong reason. The right time was just as the Time Stop was fading, and he had little choice to think of an alternate plan (or, to think through the proffered plan). V received "ultimate arcane power" and lost it. Xykon even calls him on this, pointing out that all his power is for naught as it is still "shackled to your lame mid-level ass." There is no question that the terms of the prophecy have been met.

* Stammers are indicated by a hyphen, not dots. The four words are written "I... I must succeed", not "I-I must succeed".

* Wrong. [[Word of God|Rich]] [[Jossed|confirmed that the prophecy has been fulfilled.]]

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* Jossed as A: Haley has no intention to pay anymore, B: Roy is supposed to break up from prison with him, C: Tyrinar is dead and he isn't Elan's dad.

== The Monster's father was [[SCP Foundation ~~(Wiki)~~|682]]. ==

== The Monster's father was [[SCP Foundation|682]]. ==

The Monster in the Darkness does mention that his father was "BIG, and he ate a lot". Evidently the hatred for all things living doesn't run in the family. Alternately, or possibly on top of that, it might be 231's [Data Expunged]; it's either one of the early less-harmful test runs, or it just takes a few decades or centuries to get to the point of being evil and powerful enough to end the world.

* Jossed. [[Word of God]] says the MitD is something from D&D.

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== The Monster In The Darkness isn't hidden in the shadows. It ''is'' the shadows ==

* It's the [[Doctor Who ~~(TV)~~|Vashta Nerada]]! It fears the light, it's virtually unstoppable, and most of all it's only shown attack is to eat people.

* It's the [[Doctor Who|Vashta Nerada]]! It fears the light, it's virtually unstoppable, and most of all it's only shown attack is to eat people.

** You mean, Belkar attacked the darkness? And by the way, it doesn't fear the light. It keeps trying to get lit up.

*** That's because it's been pretending to be [[Obfuscating Stupidity|vulnerable and harmless]]. It's been [[The Chessmaster|planing everything from behind the scenes]], by [[The Man Behind the Man|animating a skeleton and passing it off as a lich king]].