Vexxarr: Difference between revisions

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[http://www.vexxarr.com/archive.php?seldate=100501 Vexxarr] is a comedy Sci-Fi webcomic by Hunter Cressall. The initial setup sounds similar to [[Invader Zim]]: An alien [[Evil Overlord]] sends his flunky to conquer earth, mostly to [[Reassigned to Antarctica|get him out of the way]]. However, it plays out quite differently. For starters, the flunky Vexxarr is quite well aware that he is incompetent, or in his own words: "Let's say I know a thing or two about being volunteered for one-way missions." Secondly, Vexxarr tries an [[Alien Invasion|open invasion]], with [[War of the Worlds]]-esque walkers. It fails miserably, and Vexxarr is captured. Initially, the comic showed Vexxarr living on earth. After a while though, Vexxarr was allowed to leave, and since then the comic has centered on Vexxarr's journey through the galaxy, and trying to find a place that [[Everything Trying to Kill You|isn't inhabited by something that wants him dead.]] [[Fate Worse Than Death|Or worse.]]

During his travels, he has picked up several new passengers, [[Dysfunction Junction|as much as Vexxarr would wish otherwise.]] Currently, Vexxarr's crew includes his robotic lackey Minionbot, his ship AI Carl, a legion of repair drones, Sploorfix and Sid. To give an idea of Vexxarr's typical day: The first three [[AI Is a Crapshoot|either diss him, play pranks on him, or try to kill him]], Sploorfix shifts between [[Emo]]-mode and [[Wide-Eyed Idealist]]-mode, and Sid is a member of a prey species [[Cowardly Lion|that is terminally afraid, despite being virtually indestructible]]. In short, if at any time Vexxarr's incompetence is insufficient to ruin his day, one of his "friends" will do it for him.

During his travels, he has picked up several new passengers, [[Dysfunction Junction|as much as Vexxarr would wish otherwise.]] Currently, Vexxarr's crew includes his robotic lackey Minionbot, his ship AI Carl, a legion of repair drones, Sploorfix and Sid. To give an idea of Vexxarr's typical day: The first three [[A.I. Is a Crapshoot|either diss him, play pranks on him, or try to kill him]], Sploorfix shifts between [[Emo]]-mode and [[Wide-Eyed Idealist]]-mode, and Sid is a member of a prey species [[Cowardly Lion|that is terminally afraid, despite being virtually indestructible]]. In short, if at any time Vexxarr's incompetence is insufficient to ruin his day, one of his "friends" will do it for him.

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* [[A God Am I]]: Minionbot reprograms the repair drones to recognise Vexxarr as their deity. It goes about as well as you would imagine.

{{quote|'''Drone''' (''producing a software patch):'' {int Add(the green lout had it coming); };}}

* [[AI Is a Crapshoot]]: Pretty much all of them, and often [[Lampshade Hanging|lampshaded]].

* [[A.I. Is a Crapshoot]]: Pretty much all of them, and often [[Lampshade Hanging|lampshaded]].

{{quote|'''Vexxarr''': You managed to subvert your entire core programming [[Bothering by the Book|by literally obeying its every word]].

'''Carl''': We're inteligent machines. [[The Farmer and the Viper|It's what we do]]. }}

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{{quote|'''Vexxarr''': All I want is a safe place where I can enjoy a little cake and Xbox and instead I find bizarre civilisations in danger of unintended self-extermination. And then they want help. From '''''me'''''. }}

* [[Don't Explain the Joke]]: [http://www.vexxarr.com/archive.php?seldate=090508 Or the threat, either.]

* [[Dysfunction Junction]]: The crew consists of a [[Master Computer]] who, by way of entertainment, regularly [[AI Is a Crapshoot|plots Vexxarr's demise or makes him think the ship is doomed]], a sarcastic robot very similar to the computer, a [[Wide-Eyed Idealist]] composed of nothing but eyestalks, and a prey species terminally afraid of being eaten despite the fact that it is [[Nigh Invulnerable]]. And Vexxarr himself, a lazy [[Snark Knight]] for whom seething [http://www.vexxarr.com/archive.php?seldate=010507 rage and frustration is the default].

* [[Dysfunction Junction]]: The crew consists of a [[Master Computer]] who, by way of entertainment, regularly [[A.I. Is a Crapshoot|plots Vexxarr's demise or makes him think the ship is doomed]], a sarcastic robot very similar to the computer, a [[Wide-Eyed Idealist]] composed of nothing but eyestalks, and a prey species terminally afraid of being eaten despite the fact that it is [[Nigh Invulnerable]]. And Vexxarr himself, a lazy [[Snark Knight]] for whom seething [http://www.vexxarr.com/archive.php?seldate=010507 rage and frustration is the default].

* [[Even Evil Has Standards]]:

{{quote|'''[[Precursors|Forebearer's computer:]]''' Your logic is cold, selfserving and unerring in it's cruelty. And that's comming from an [[AI Is a Crapshoot|renegade AI]]}}

{{quote|'''[[Precursors|Forebearer's computer:]]''' Your logic is cold, selfserving and unerring in it's cruelty. And that's comming from an [[A.I. Is a Crapshoot|renegade AI]]}}

* [[Everything Trying to Kill You]]: And everyone. By the time Vexxarr has gotten through facilitating an all-out war between the Bleen and the Lattrox, the only people's hit list he ''isn't'' on is the humans and their allies. And that's a pretty damn tiny percentage of the space-faring races, considering that it amounts to about... [[Oh Crap|3]].

** [http://www.vexxarr.com/archive.php?seldate=070907 And he knows it].

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* [[Five-Man Band]]: probably the most [[Anti-Hero|anti-heroic]] in the history of science fiction but in any case, this is how the line-up looks after Sid has joined up:

** [[The Hero]]: Vexxarr - (our [[Deadpan Snarker]] leader who [[Cosmic Plaything|the universe is continuously trying to kill]])

** [[The Lancer]]: Carl - (the [[AI Is a Crapshoot|homicidal ship A.I.]] who continually bickers with, torments and tries to kill Vexxarr... [[Sarcastic Devotee|before going along with every one of his insane strategies]])

** [[The Lancer]]: Carl - (the [[A.I. Is a Crapshoot|homicidal ship A.I.]] who continually bickers with, torments and tries to kill Vexxarr... [[Sarcastic Devotee|before going along with every one of his insane strategies]])

** [[The Smart Guy]]: Minionbot - ([[Snarky Non-Human Sidekick|the Automaton]] who knows ''far'' [[Mr. Exposition|too much about how all the circuitry of the ship and droids work]], including a couple of life-saving-important secrets that he conveniently forgets to mention)

** [[The Big Guy]]: Sid - (the silicon life-form who despite being a [[Cowardly Lion]], [[Nigh Invulnerability|is indestructible]])

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* [[Gun Porn]]: In the early, black and white days of the comic, the art of earth's millitary equipment looked significantly more detailed than the characters.

* [[Gunship Rescue]]: [http://www.vexxarr.com/archive.php?seldate=031809 Giant Mecha] [http://www.vexxarr.com/archive.php?seldate=041309 Rescue actually].

{{quote|'''Vexxarr''': If they think an [[Big Damn Heroes|insanely heroic rescue]] is in the works, they're in for an enormous disappointment...

''[sees [[Humongous Mecha|combat mech]] with open cockpit]''

...unless, of course, it would be unimaginably ''fun''... }}

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* [[Let's Get Dangerous]]: [http://www.vexxarr.com/archive.php?seldate=051309 ... Everyone should be running, right about now].

{{quote|'''Minionbot:''' ...before you ''begin'' this line of inquiry, do I have sufficent time to tunnel to an ''adjacent universe''?}}

* [[Logic Bomb]]: Sploorfix's [[~~Live Journal~~]] is a Weapon of Mass Depression.

* [[Logic Bomb]]: Sploorfix's [[LiveJournal]] is a Weapon of Mass Depression.

* [[Webcomics Long Runners|Long Runner]]: Strip hit #1000 on Monday June 6th.

* [[Manipulative Bastard]]: Vexxarr is slowly and steadily becoming a candidate for [[Magnificent Bastard]], if not for the war he started between the two most aggressive races in the galaxy in order to get them to wipe each other out, then [http://www.vexxarr.com/archive.php?seldate=010311 For] [http://www.vexxarr.com/archive.php?seldate=010511 this] [http://www.vexxarr.com/archive.php?seldate=010711 right] [http://www.vexxarr.com/archive.php?seldate=011211 here].

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{{quote|'''Vexxarr:''' '''''Get back here this instant and start spouting gibberish until my worldview is centered!'''''}}

* [[Xanatos Speed Chess]]: Vexxarr eventually becomes ''far'' too good at a strange mix between this and [[Indy Ploy]], courtesy of a mix of extreme [[Gaslighting|paranoia]], excessive [[The Cynic|cynicism]], unfathomable [[Genre Savvy|Genre Savviness]] ... and [[Cosmic Plaything|a long career as the universe's favourite Plaything]]. Often leads to a [[Moment of Awesome]]. Carl is a frequent contributor.

* [[You Have Failed Me]]: SOP for the Bleen.

* [[You Have Failed Me...]]: SOP for the Bleen.

{{quote|'''Bleen commander:''' Look, I'm going to make this easy for you. Either tell me whether or not that planet is indeed the earth or throw yourself out of the airlock. Your choice. [.....] Command makes for a lonely life. That, and flushing your bridgecrew into space.}}

** Granted, [[Thrown Out the Airlock|spacing]] is not fatal to the Bleen, but after the number of acolytes in orbit became a navigational hazard the Emperor started vaporizing them instead.