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What a Piece of Junk!: Difference between revisions
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{{trope}}
[[File:
{{quote|"''She may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts, kid.''"
|'''Han Solo''', ''[[Star Wars]]'', on the ''Millennium Falcon''.}}
This is your car? [[The Alleged Car|This is a pathetic rusted-out bucket of bolts]]! I'm sorry, what exactly makes you think this thing will get us three blocks before collapsing in a big puff of blue smoke? I've seen cars crushed into cubes that were still more impressive-looking than yours... did we just pass a Lamborghini?
'''What A Piece
It is not limited to cars, or even
Of course, as many of the examples will demonstrate, the vehicle will probably still be prone to [[Plot-Driven Breakdown|breakdowns at inopportune moments]].
Polar opposite of this trope is the [[Rice Burner]]. Compare [[Lethal Joke Character]] and [[Excalibur in
{{examples}}
▲== Anime & Manga ==
* Takumi Fujiwara's 1986 Toyota Corolla GT-S (a.k.a. the Trueno GT-Apex) in ''[[Initial D]]''. None of the other racers in the series take his car seriously, because "it's just a silly little Trueno". What they don't know is that A) the car is owned, maintained, and tuned by Bunta Fujiwara {{spoiler|''who used to be one of the top street racers in Gunma Prefecture''}} and B) Takumi's a lot more skilled than his opponents give him credit for. {{spoiler|In fact, when his buddy Itsuki gets a Levin SR, he and Takumi take it for a spin up Mount Akina, where they run into some second-string racers from a rival racing team known as the Night Kids - and though Itsuki's Levin SR is a lot less powerful than the Trueno GT-Apex, ''the Night Kids wind up sucking the Levin's exhaust!''}}
** It was in fact the ''Initial D'' franchise that pushed the RWD 80-series Corolla coupes from "cheap old beater" to "sought-after classic" status.
** To be perfectly fair, the
* ''[[Irresponsible Captain Tylor]]'': There is a reason that
* In ''[[Rurouni Kenshin]]'', everyone scoffs at the idea of [[Big Bad|Shishio]] trying to invade Tokyo Harbor in a wooden boat, until he [[I Am Not Left-Handed|reveals it's really an ironclad battleship covered with wood as a disguise]].
* [[Lupin III]]'s Fiat 500 in ''[[The Castle of Cagliostro]]''. It ''seems'' to be a wimpy little subcompact car, but it's actually a heavily modified vehicle that can go seriously fast, run up near-vertical cliff faces and survive grenade blasts.
== Comic Books ==
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** It is worth noting that Ferdinand Porsche ''himself'' was the founding engineer of VW - combinations of parts from both companies are frequent in [[Real Life]].
* In ''[[Iron Man]] Noir'', Pepper is surprised to find that the infamous Captain Namor's legendary ship, the ''Lady Dorma'', is a real beater. Stark assures her it's got more kick than you'd think. As it turns out, {{spoiler|the rust-bucket is actually a cover for the real ''Lady Dorma'', a small submarine stored in the cargo hold.}}
*
== Film ==
* ''[[Star Wars]]'' is the [[Trope Namer]], from Luke's line about the ''[[Cool Starship|Millennium Falcon]]''.
** Leia's line when she first sets eyes on it also qualifies: "You came in that thing? You're braver than I thought."
** What makes this [[Fridge Brilliance|brilliant]] is that the audience has ''never really seen'' a [[Cool Starship]] before this movie: seriously everything sci-fi (except for ''[[Star Trek]]'') was all rockets and spinning discs. The characters are mocking a ship that for most viewers looks like the coolest ship ever.
** The ''[[Star Wars Expanded Universe]]'' gives context to this comment: The YT-1300 has been around for ''72 years'' at this point, with the Falcon itself 60 years old (literally older than the "old man" next to him) and was one of the most produced vehicles of its class in galactic history. Baseline YT-1300 stats are unexceptional in all RPG systems except for the ease of modifying it (which can easily double the cost).
**And as of ''[[The Force Awakens]],'' the ''Millennium Falcon'' is old enough for it's age to show once it's shown after Rey calls it a piece of garbage. However, it's still fast enough to give the TIE pilots of the First Order a run for their money in the ensuring chase.
* Jake Blues in ''[[The Blues Brothers]]'' is not initially impressed with the beat-up used police car Elwood arrives in, but... well, let's say that the car proves its worth throughout the rest of the film.
{{quote|
* The Crown Victoria LTD, a/k/a the "Ford POS," from ''[[Men in Black (
* Herbie, [[The Love Bug]]! A VW Beetle with an ugly paint job and the saddest horn you've ever heard, but fitted with a sports car engine for the racing scenes.
** In ''Herbie: Fully Loaded'', someone notes that the speedometer goes past 200
** In ''Herbie Goes Bananas'', he spends most of the movie very rusty and covered in child-made graffiti. He doesn't get restored until the epilogue.
* ''[[The World's Fastest Indian]]''. Equally applied to the rebuilt motorcycle and
* The Herkimer Battle Jitney from ''[[Mystery Men]]''.
* There are several examples on ''[[Cars]]'':
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*** In the sequel, Mater is [[Mistaken for Spies|mistaken for a spy]] and equiped with holographic disguises, rocket boosters and hidden weapons. He also shows remarkable knowledge of [[Alleged Car|lemons]], which comes in handy as the bad guys are Gremlins, Pacers and the like. {{spoiler|He even figures out the identity of the [[Big Bad]] all by himself, and pulls a [[Batman Gambit]] on him.}}
** Doc Hudson is sort of an example. In real life, the Hudson Hornet was specifically built as a racing car, but to modern eyes it just looks like an "old grandpa car", as McQueen puts it in the movie.
* In ''[[The Fast and
** ''Tokyo Drift'' has the protagonist putting his old, rusted Monte Carlo against a flashy, spankin' new Viper. The Monte Carlo ''wins so hard''.
* In the 2007 ''[[Transformers (
* ''[[Grease]]'': The T-Birds' car, before they turn it into "Greased Lightning" is a "hunk o' junk".
== Literature ==
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* [[Private Eye]] [[Mike Hammer]] has his "heap", but at one stage it's mentioned that there's a Cadillac engine under the hood.
* In ''[[The Oregon Files]]'' of the [[NUMA Series]] the titular freighter looks like a giant piece of junk. However it is outfitted with some of the best boating equipment you can imagine. For example that rust you see is really a special paint that keeps the ship off of radar. It has enough firepower to go toe to toe with a Libyan warship. The only thing that stopped the Oregon from sinking said warship was because it would have caused an international incident.
* In Banjo Paterson's poem ''[[The Man From Snowy River]]'', the title character rides an apparent [[The Alleged Steed|Alleged Steed]] described as "a small and weedy beast", but it turns out to be the only non-feral horse in the area that doesn't balk at mountains and keeps its footing in the scrubland.
** Parodied with "Snowy", the pony in ''[[
* In William Gibson's [[Bridge Trilogy]] (and primarily ''[[Virtual Light]]'') Chevette's bicycle is this: a cutting-edge paper-wrapped carbon-fiber frame with a rather serious security system, but carefully painted to look like a beat-up old junker.
* The ''Nostalgia For Infinity'' in [[Alastair Reynolds]]' ''Revelation Space'' series. It's a slower-than-light 4 kilometer ship, with huge swathes of the interior exposed to the vacuum and radiation of space, parts of the ship corrupted by viruses, and a [[The Virus|corrupted]] cyborg for a captain. The ''Infinity'' carries "Hell-class" weapons which it found in a booby trapped asteroid; the weapons bend physics, and could presumably easily [[Apocalypse How|raze the surface of a planet]] - when the ''Infinity'' threatens a colony, they are terrified of the ship's firepower even ''without'' [[Colony Drop|knowing]] [[Weaponized Exhaust|about]] the hell-class weapons.
* The ''U.S.S. Lovell'' from the ''[[Starfleet Corps of Engineers]]'' and ''[[Star Trek: Vanguard]]'' series. It's an old ''Daedalus''-class starship that had been decommissioned for a half-century or so before the S.C.E. claimed it for their own. It has mismatched hull plates, welds and patches all over, and rattles like it's about to explode when it first accelerates to warp speed. But because it's a ship full of engineers who have nothing better to do than tinker, repair, or rebuild things, it can keep up with (or outrun) any ship in the fleet.
* In ''Blade of the Poisoner'' and ''Master of Fiends'', Scythe's horse Hob is [[The Alleged Steed|scruffy, rawboned, and generally described in a manner reminiscent of Gunpowder from]] ''[[The Legend of Sleepy Hollow]]''. He's a [[Cool Horse]].
▲== Live Action TV ==
* [[Firefly|Serenity]]! Oh, Serenity from ''Firefly'' is very much this. It's outdated, but it'll run forever with maintenance.
{{quote|
'''Book:''' Excuse me?
'''Kaylee:''' You like ships. You don't seem to be lookin' at the destinations. What you care about is the ships, and mine's the nicest.
'''Book:''' She don't look like much.
'''Kaylee:''' Oh, she'll fool ya'.
▲** Well, justified as the Tardis is [[The Alleged Car|barely working and requires all manner of jury rigs and hasty repairs to keep going]] ([[Percussive Maintenance|along with the occasional hammer on the control panel]]). However, you can't forget that this little police box can travel ''anywhere and [[Time Travel|anywhen]] in the universe'', is [[Bigger On the Inside|at least the size of an office building inside]], and can ''tow planets''.
▲*** Eleven's incarnation of the TARDIS is an extreme example, having apparently repaired itself with old alarm clocks, car parts, and a vintage Victrola.
** The Third Doctor's "Bessie" is an Edwardian roadster. Very nice to drive, but not exactly ''powerful''. The Doctor has made some improvements, though, and not only does Bessie have an inertialess hyperdrive, but also a remote control and anti-theft force fields.
*** Ace has this very reaction to her first sight of "Bessie"
* Every now and again on ''[[Top Gear]]''. Two examples are the trophy Toyota Hilux pickup truck, which looks like a tragic wreck because the presenters tried to kill it ''and failed'', and "Oliver," Richard Hammond's tiny but plucky 1963 Opel Kadett. Oliver managed to complete the African challenge without any modifications, while Clarkson and May had to strip off the doors, seats, etc. from their cars to cross the salt flats. The only problems Oliver had were when Hammond tried to ford a river and sank him.
** ''Top Gear'' also took some bloke's Lada and had it [http://paultan.org/2005/07/21/a-lotus-lada/ tuned by Lotus].
* During the Ashes challenge, they used a Van with the Chassis and Engine of a Jaguar.
* Christine's unseen [http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Buick_Roadmaster_75_1958.jpg 1958 Buick Roadmaster] from ''[[Night Court]].'' Stuck with it after her father sold her beloved compact to buy this one (because it was supposedly safer), the thing turns out to be a [[Nigh Invulnerable]] pinball that survived a crash that would've destroyed her old car (and her along with it) without a scratch (On the car: Christine broke a nail.)
{{quote|
* ''[[Saturday Night Live]]'' had a fake commercial for the "Chameleon LX", a high-end luxury car with a powerful engine and fine leather interiors disguised to look like a piece of crap junker from two decades prior. Features to pull off this illusion included three mismatched hubcaps and a schoolbus-yellow painted rim, driver-side door that seemed to have been recycled from a different model car and a false transmission fluid leak to tell thieves "Hey, not worth the trouble."
== Tabletop Games ==
* ''[[Warhammer
== Video Games ==
* The speedster you use in ''[[Half-Life|Half-Life 2 Episode 2]]'', known affectionately as "The Muscle Car". Alyx is impressed with it from the start, presumably because pre-apocalypse cars that work at all are rare and this one does sort of look like it was a classic car once.
** The airboat counts as well. Beneath the exposed frame and rusty appearance lies a monster that maneuvers in water like nobody's business (not so much on land, but that's not where it was intended to run on anyway), can bowl over anything that isn't made of metal, and is light enough to ''glide'' during [[Ramp Jump|leaps]]. It also supports the eventual installation of [[BFG|a devastatingly powerful helicopter-based machinegun]]. Unfortunately, later on, the only option is to ditch it. And then you have to use the scout car...
** ... which is another dirt-covered diamond. It's just as bony bare
* All the cars in the ''[[Twisted Metal]]'' series look fairly beat up, although there is a [[Vehicular Combat|good reason...]]
* The hovercraft from ''[[Beyond Good
* About 3/4ths of the Minmatar ships in ''[[
* ''[[
* Sweet's Greenwood in ''[[Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas]]''. At first glance, it appears to be an unremarkable, boxy, and dated sedan (even by 1992 standards), but turns out to be dependable enough that it's the definitive car driven during specific drive-by shootings and car chases in missions. Even after the car survives a [[Helicopter Blender]], [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-P0HkRCCplI#t=9m09s ends up in a spectacular crash with a tanker trailer], and Sweet's stint in prison, Sweet remained insistent reacquiring the same car, having the player driving it in late in the storyline and the final mission.
{{quote|
'''Sweet:''' "Hey, if it ain't broke, don't fix it." }}
** A better in-game example (as the Greenwood is average at best in all areas) is the Clover. It looks like your typical redneck ride, corroded paint and parts of different colors included. However, it has a very nice acceleration rate, brakes nicely and turns like a dream. It's not on par with the [[Cool Car|sportscars]] you can find in richer areas, but it's a dependable ride that's very common everywhere.
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* In ''[[League of Legends]]'' Rumble's [[Mini-Mecha]] looks like it was made by digging through a scrap yard ( which it was), but it's the mecha that makes the anthropomorphic hamster one of the fiercest bullies in the game. The fact that it's composed of junk is actually a part of his gameplay mechanics, as using abilities generates heat and getting too much heat results in him being unable to use his abilities until the mecha cools down. In addition his idle animations and joke show the mecha seizing up in some way or another, but it's certainly up to snuff in battle.
* Teladi Ships in the ''[[X]]'' series tend toward this trope. In particular the capital ships, which appear to have been put together almost entirely from spare parts. However they tend to be extremely heavy on the defense. A number of Pirate variants of normal ships also fit.
== Web Original ==
* In ''[[Project 0]]'' Aatu prides himself on his [https://web.archive.org/web/20170525063927/http://centralcitytower.blogspot.com/2010/03/machine-introduction-buggy.html buggy], even though Owen is quick to make fun of it.
** Still it manages to keep up with a magical flying boy so it probably applies.
* The [[
== Western Animation ==
* ''[[
* ''[[Storm Hawks]]'' has The Condor, their airship, which is constantly breaking down and yet still holds the record for fastest air speed in the Atmos. What's more, it broke it's OWN record, made over 100 years ago.
* The 1970s show ''Hot Wheels'' had an episode in which "Fake-Out" was the police slang term for a car of this sort used by armed robbers as a getaway vehicle.
* Rick's spaceship-car on ''[[Rick and Morty]]'' has a dirty, dented hull in bad need of a paint job, and tends to make a lot of noise while running. Rick seems to put very little effort into cleaning it, and the interior is always cluttered with junk. A [[Running Gag]] in the series occurs whenever someone opens one of the doors - either to enter or exit it - and empty liquor bottles fall onto the ground as a result. Still, it's a safe and efficient vehicle capable of faster-than-light travel, can outmaneuver or outfight the Federation's much larger ships, and is equipped with a wide variety of weapons, gadgets, and a semi-sentient AI system, which while loyal and obedient, tends to be just as sadistic as Rick while following his instructions.
== Real Life ==
* The original (pre-BMW) Mini might have qualified. It looked and felt cheap
* Secondhand reports indicate that no less a vehicle than ''the'' [[Alleged Car]], the infamous Trabant, could be upgraded to take a modern lightweight engine. Because the Trabbi's [[Made of Plasticine|duraplast]] bodywork is so lightweight, its cornering and power-to-weight ratios would thus be good enough to take on some modern sports cars
{{quote|
* This trope, as applied to gaming PCs circa 2011: Imagine a quad-core processor, many gigs of ram, solid-state hard drive, powerful graphics card, power supply, and cooling system... housed inside a mid-90s boxy beige Compaq Presario case with "Pentium II" and "Designed for Windows 95" case badges.
* There are stories circulating in the automotive industry about some Volkswagen engineers in Germany who took a [[wikipedia:Volkswagen Type 2 (T1)#T2|Volkswagen Bus]] (a minivan with an anemic
* The [[wikipedia:Toyota FJ40|Toyota FJ40]], also sold as [http://pt.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toyota_Bandeirante Toyota Bandeirante] in Brazil, manufactured until 2001. Rather plain on the outside, but still beats [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hfbFJ__UkIQ many newer pick-up trucks].
* The M35A2 [[wikipedia:M35 2
* [http://jalopnik.com/5497042/how-a-500-craigslist-car-beat-400k-rally-racers This] $500 BMW held its own against state-of-the-art cars at a World Rally Championship race.
* [http://jalopnik.com/5297014/oklahoma-home-of-the-sleepiest-sleeper-truck-ever The Farm Truck] Looks like a beat up old Chevy, but runs 12.3s quarter miles.
* This is one of the purposes behind [https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLGSOZAHg1yQHU1tc_3Y5MTQg1qjtxA_nq Project Binky], a YouTube series posted intermittently since 2013 by Nik and Richard at [https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHvBHWBzzB7NyU5tIiEZHBg Bad Obsession Motorsport]. These two mad geniuses have stripped down a 1980 Mini 1000 and shoved the drivetrain and suspension from a 1991 Toyota Celica GT-Four, known as the All-Trac Turbo in the US, into it. They've given themselves the limitation that the Mini cannot look any different from a stock 1980 Mini when they're done. Along the way they're improving just about everything about the car's design, right down to a vastly superior sound system. The whole goal is to create a racing vehicle that in no way looks like a racing vehicle.
{{reflist}}
[[Category:{{PAGENAME}}]]
[[Category:Vehicle Tropes]]
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