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Line 51: Insert sexual innuendo here. And the [[Chorus-Only Song\|practically unknown]] verse places the dreamer in Beverly Hills. [~~http~~https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=~~GJSUT8Inl14&feature=related~~Hr1kITD4X6U Here is the song in all of ~~it's~~its glory. Sung by Bing Crosby] * [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YeUMfZzdiEc And the Frank Sinatra version.]{{Dead link}} * [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e5owUdvwcQ0 The Otis Redding version]{{Dead link}}, which may very well me the most emotionally heart-breaking version. (Contemplated putting in the glurge section. ** [[Running Gag\|And for you Anime fans,]] [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_PhREBUJ5zs there is a Sailor Mars version.] * [[Sufjan Stevens]] put out a 5-CD box set of Christmas songs, both old and new. His original songs include "Get Behind Me, Santa!", "Sister Winter", "We're Goin' To The Country", "Put The Lights on the Tree", "That Was the Worst Christmas Ever!" and "Come On! Let's Boogey to the Elf Dance!" Line 98: * [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C1aguHjgd8g We Wish You A Merry Christmas] * [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=11GlNvi7hPY Good King Wenceslas] Used in ''[[The Dark Is Rising]]'' as a favorite carol of the Old Ones. Also mocked in [[Terry Pratchett]]'s ''[[~~Discworld/Hogfather\|~~Hogfather]]''. * [[Crowning Moment of Funny\|Also used memorably]] in ''[[Love Actually]]''. * [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vwi-gfMiAeg The First Noel] * [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wT-6yjT4oFo The Holly and the Ivy]. Line 136: * "It's Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas" * "The Most Wonderful Time of the Year" * * "All I Want For Christmas Is You". [[Mariah Carey\|"I don't want a lot for ~~christmas~~Christmas... there is just one thing I need..."]]. Listen to the radio regularly during December, and you will '''definitely''' hear this song. ** Mariah Carey has become too keenly aware of the omnipresence of her song during the holidays, and has posted videos where she portrays herself as the (sightly creepy) Christmas Harbinger. * "[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HFEQvd0kJxM Guanaguanare]", by Jesus Avila. Line 152: A parody of a parody: "Grandpa Got Runned Over by a John Deere" by Cledus T. Judd. And yes, it's still a Christmas song... sorta. There was also (during the height of their career) a parody song called [[New Kids on the Block\|"New Kids Got Run Over By A Reindeer"]] ... * The many, many [[Bob Rivers]] "Twisted Christmas" songs. (Not all of which are strictly parodies or even humorous -- his version of "O Little Town of Bethlehem" sung to the tune of "House of the Rising Sun" is played remarkably straight.) * Most of the Bob Rivers catalogue. ~~Bob~~One ~~Dylan~~example originally located elsewhere in this list: [~~http~~https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=~~a8qE6WQmNus~~h4NlR5KQLQ8 ~~Must~~"The BeTwelve ~~Santa].~~Pains ~~Nothing like a good old-fashioned Hanukkah themed~~of Christmas ~~song!~~"]. ~~There is a~~A disturbingly hilarious parody of "Walkin' In A Winter Wonderland" called "Walkin' Round In Women's Underwear", about crossdressing.▼ ** There's also "Grabbe Yahbalz" ("Grab your balls like Michael Jackson! Fa-la-la-la-la...) and "The Restroom Door Said Gentlemen". * Bob Dylan [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8qE6WQmNus "Must Be Santa"]. Nothing like a good old-fashioned Hanukkah themed Christmas song! * Jethro Tull with their whole Christmas Album (though a few ''almost'' play it straight, at least in spirit). ** Also, [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h90JVJmPmt0 'A Christmas Song'] one of their earlier songs (reworked on the Christmas Album). Starts off as a traditional carol and then changes theme. {{quote\|''Once in Royal David’s City ''Stood a lowly cattle shed, ''Where a mother laid her baby. ''You’d do well to remember the things He later said. ''When you’re stuffing yourselves at the Christmas parties, ''You’ll laugh when I tell you to take a running jump. ''You’re missing the point I’m sure does not need making; ''The Christmas spirit is not what you drink... }} {{quote\|...[outro] Hey, Santa, pass that bottle will you?}} * "Rusty Chevrolet", an ode to [[The Alleged Car]], again by [[Da Yoopers]]. * "[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dyDc1s9imvI Christmas at Ground Zero]" and "The Night Santa Went Crazy", both by [["Weird Al" Yankovic]]. ** His song "Weasel Stomping Day", sung in typical [[Glurge\|Glurgical]] Christmas style, concerns a fictitious holiday in which people wear Viking helmets, spread mayonnaise on their lawns, and [[Exactly What It Says on the Tin\|squish weasels under their boots]]. Line 195 ⟶ 198: * "[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d9Bf2H59cLM I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus]" * "[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nHKTj02cmHI Father Christmas]", by [[The Kinks]], in which a man playing Father Christmas outside a (presumably British) department store is mugged by street thugs. "Father Christmas, give us your money! Don't mess around with those silly toys!" Punkest Christmas song ever! * "[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g_VhHqK6yoQ All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth]" by [[Spike Jones]]. ** And "I'm The Angel In The Christmas Play" by the same, which is about an unrepentant delinquent cheerfully admitting to all the mischief he's been up to, ending each verse with an announcement that he's playing the angel in the school Christmas play. * "I Won't Be Home For Christmas" by Blink 182, with a chorus that goes "It's Christmas time again/It's time to be nice to the people you can't stand." Line 202 ⟶ 205: * ''Merry F** king Christmas'' and ''A Lonely Jew On Christmas'', both from ''[[South Park]]''. * Denis Leary has a Christmas special as well as a song by the title ''Merry F king Chistmas'', complete with overly cynical lyrics such as "Old St. Nick's got bourbon breath / It's so cold you could catch your death / A cop just sold me crystal meth / It's a merry f king Christmas" * Sort of borderline, but ''[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tN2NNwZ1op8 Merry Christmas (I Don't Want to Fight Tonight)]'' by ~~the~~[[The Ramones]]. * "Ohhhh, Santa Claus, [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSilUOS4Ph8 Santa Claus, You are much too fat..."] The highlight of many an Elementary School Christmas performance. * ''Jingle Bell Metal'' by Psychostick contains parodies of several Christmas songs. * "Ho Ho [BEEP] Ho", "Hey Santa!" (and no doubt a few more) by [[Kevin Bloody Wilson]]. * [[They Might Be Giants]] have a few, most of which involve Santa Claus acting like a dick to the narrator. * In ''[[The Colbert Report\|A Colbert Christmas]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/video?keywords=A+Colbert+Christmas The Greatest Gift of All]'', Stephen performs the cheery, extremely unsubtle "[http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/211035/november-23-2008/a-colbert-christmas--another-christmas-song Another Christmas Song]", which is all about people buying "Another Christmas Song" and hopefully making it a yearly Christmas standard so that Stephen can get rich. Multiple levels of metafiction at once coupled with multiple levels of [[Special Effect Failure]]. Line 216 ⟶ 219: * "The Twelve Days ''After'' Christmas" focuses on the downsides of owning all the gifts from its namesake song, and the nasty breakup between the "true loves" that results. The title works only because many people don't realize that the actual "Twelve Days of Christmas" ''are'' after Christmas; they are the twelve days from Christmas to Epiphany. {{quote\|''The four calling birds were a big mistake / for their language was obscene / the five golden rings were completely fake / and they turned my fingers green!''}} * [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h4NlR5KQLQ8 The Twelve Pains of Christmas].▼ * Thrash band Whiplash has a song called I Hate Christmas, with arguably one of the greatest lines in all of music: "Jingle Bells, I'll see you in Hell!" * Rhan Wilson's [http://www.altared.com/ Altared Christmas] series. The gimmick? What if you played Christmas songs in a [[Darker and Edgier]] minor key? It's a lot better than it sounds, that's what. * "You Ain't Getting S*** for Christmas". The song is hilarious when ma "Takes the two fruitcakes and the turkey and throws them out the front window." * Ray Stevens has several, including "Xerox Xmas Letter," (an over-the-top Christmas letter for "Nightmare Before Christmas" (where he dreams that a bunch of lawyers take Santa to court for wearing fur, smoking, working only one day a year, etc.). * The Jingle Bell Barking Dogs. ** And their feline counterparts. ▲* There is a disturbingly hilarious parody of "Walkin' In A Winter Wonderland" called "Walkin' Round In Women's Underwear", about crossdressing. ** That's courtesy Bob Rivers, a parodist who basically makes a living off of songs like "Grabbe Yahbalz" ("Grab your balls like Michael Jackson! Fa-la-la-la-la...), "The Restroom Door Said Gentlemen", and, most brilliantly, "O Little Town of Bethlehem" set to the tune of "The House of the Rising Sun", with a pretty good Dylan impersonation. * And let's not forget "Monster Holiday", the Christmas-themed sequel to "The Monster Mash". * [[ACDC]] gives us "Mistress for Christmas", which (as one might have guessed from an AC/DC song) is [[Bawdy Song\|less about the "Christmas" part and more about the "Mistress" part]]. * "Please Santa Claus" by Anna Russell. * [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aogz162O5pE "The 12 Guido Days of Christmas"]. * "No More Christmas Singles", the ''[[Spitting Image]]''... er... [[Hypocritical Humour\|Christmas Single]]. ''{{quote\|''No more Christmas singles ''They're worse than any war ''If we hear Aled Jones again ''[[Glurge\|We'll throw up on the floor]] }} * The entire ''Oi to the World'' album by the Vandals, but especially "My First Christmas As a Woman". * "[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IX97wkmM0n0 Elf's Lament]" by Barenaked Ladies and featuring Michael Buble. Line 242: ...and a beer. ...in a treeeeee... }} * [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rCeDqmgg9ec "I Saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus"], by Stand Still. * [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BQ1386ytTjU Make A Daft Noise For Christmas] and [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0OrfFof-SN4&feature=related Father Christmas Do Not Touch Me] (about "a most immoral Santa") by [[The Goodies]]. * {{color\|purple\|Hark, how the}} [[Verbal Tic\|WAA]] {{color\|purple\|all seem to}} [[Verbal Tic\|WAA,]] {{color\|purple\|joining in rhyme.}} [[Brawl in the Family\|WALUIGI TIME!]] * 1960s garage-rock band The Sonics did [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T7XJUeHWePw "Don't Believe in Christmas"], airing typical holiday disappointments to the tune of Chuck Berry's "Too Much Monkey Business". * [[How the Grinch Stole Christmas! (animation)\|"You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch"]], originally sung by the inimitable [[Thurl Ravenscroft]], and since covered by numerous artists. * Kip Addotta's ''[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7q4RAORvySw "I Saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus''"]. {{spoiler\|It's actually Mommy in disguise.}} * The Venezuelan song' "[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dIT1gSc4in4 Tun-tun]", about a grouchy Scrooge type complaining about all the people celebrating outside and disrupting his sleep. It includes the verse (translated) "If the Kid<ref>Baby Jesus, the traditional gift bringer in Venezuela</ref> has born/ then you go to Bethelem/ and me, from my bed/I'll give you my bless". * Comedy Choral group Folie Vergue Takititá have a very funny set of parodies of popular Christmas songs that gets updated every year. It includes an [~~http~~https://~~www~~youtu.~~goear.com~~be/~~listen/bd87436/rodolfo-el-reno-foli-vergue-takitita~~zbdDaM47z0E awesomely dirty version]~~{{Dead link}}~~ of the "Rudolph the Red-noised Reindeer" song, where turns out that Rudolphs's problem is [[Teeny Weenie\|very tiny]]. * The comedy group Medioevo have "[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P24uZRDQeVE Mi Alegre Parrandón]", a parody of the typical cutesy spunky carol by Los Tucusitos and similar children groups, where the "kid" singing ask for such gifts as anticonceptives for her sister (also a second hand bike "so her boss don't have to bring her in the early morning"), a battery radio and a number of personal effects for "[her] brother who is so innocent]" who is now in the Model Prison, and a grill and a big jar of Adobo for her mom to help her with her skewers-selling stall near the Universitary Stadium. It ends with the "kid" having to be forcibly shut up while giving her Long List of wanted Christmas gifts, so the chorus can wrap up the song. Have a [[Vocaloid]] [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6yg9MCKq3TI version]! * [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qTx-sdR6Yzk "The Season's Upon Us"] by [[Dropkick Murphys]]. * [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T-ThguxihuQ "You Ain't Getting Didddly Squat"] by [[Heywood Banks]]. * ''[[The Bob and Tom Show]]''{{'}}s tribute to [[Dudley Moore]] as ''[[Arthur (film)\|Arthur]]'', [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6cQdd1z3uIg "It's Christmas and I Wonder Where I Am"]. * [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b05_B6Me6-s "Damn It, I'm Vixen"] by the Brian Beathard Orchestra, in which one of Santa's "original eight" complains about a certain red-nosed upstart. ▲* [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=~~h4NlR5KQLQ8~~GNDri18-eQ0 ~~The~~"I ~~Twelve~~Want ~~Pains~~a ofHippopotamus for Christmas"] by Gayla Peevey. == Glurge-laden == Line 277 ⟶ 281: * "Christmastime in Arkansas Again". A syrupy-sweet reflection about Christmas and an unashamed tribute to the state of Arkansas, with a locally famous ''weatherman'' named Ned Perme on piano. * "[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=clePvNtJWpw The Cat Carol]". Sweet Jesus, "The Cat Carol". * "[http://youtu.be/QTdzjSPZv8g Ven a mi casa esta ~~Navidad~~Navidad]" by Luis Aguile, about the singer offering a friend away from their family to spend Christmas with him and his family, fits somewhere between [[Glurge]] and [[Tear Jerker]]. Most singers covering this song go with glurgey. == Other == Line 297 ⟶ 300: {{reflist}} [[Category:~~Music Tropes~~{{PAGENAME}}]] [[Category:Christmas Tropes]] [[Category:~~Christmas~~Music ~~Songs~~Tropes]] [[Category:Pop]]