Doonesbury/Funny

(Duke, at the time the Governor General of American Samoa, pauses as he's dictating a report about the series of disasters that have overtaken the island.)

Duke: I'm a reasonable man, Macarthur, so I know this isn't snow.
Macarthur: Don't worry, sir. It never sticks.

Most any time Honey provides a Tactful Translation.

Duke: A further goal of mine is the speedy implementation of normalization.
Honey: (translating) A further goal of his is the speedy implementation of normalization
Duke: Lastly, I come to China in the hope of fulfilling a life-long ambition - dropping acid on the Great Wall
Honey: (translating) Lastly, he wishes you good health and long life
Duke: In conclusion, let me just say that I look forward to a new spirit of cooperation from our Chinese friends. I sincerely hope it won't be necessary to shell any pagodas
Honey: (translating) He also wishes your wife good health

When politician Paul Simon ran for President in 1988, one Doonesbury strip said that his running mate should be Art Garfunkel.
There was one Doonesbury strip where U.S. military recruits were being trained to go through a minefield. Except the brass decided to save money by using a cow field. "* SQUISH!* " "You're dead, cupcake!" "* SQUISH!"*
- Curtis giving the eulogy at Uncle Duke's funeral, especially with Zonker's deadpan reaction.

Curtis: "What can you say about a 25-year-old girl who died? That she was beautiful. And brilliant. That she loved Mozart and Bach and the Beatles. And me."
Zonker: "Thank you, Curtis. What the hell was that?"
Curtis: "It's from Love Story. It was the closest I could find in the library."

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