How to Survive a Horror Movie: Difference between revisions

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{{quote|''I'm sorry to the countless people whose lives I've cut short. The characters who've become unwilling sacrifices to my art: The buxom [[Badly -Battered Babysitter|babysitters]]. The [[Police Are Useless|doubting cops]]. The [[Overprotective Dad|overbearing]] [[My Beloved Smother|parents]] and [[Dogged Nice Guy|well-intentioned boyfriends]]. Teens with their whole lives ahead of them. Decent, hardworking adults. All sent to an early grave in the name of [[Money, Dear Boy|box-office gold]].''|An apology from [[Wes Craven]]}}

You know the handy rules that ''[[Scream (Filmfilm)|Scream]]'' provided us on surviving a horror movie? Well, somebody's expanded them into a whole book.

''[['''How to Survive Aa Horror Movie]]''': All the Skills to Dodge the Kills'' is a 2007 book by horror lover Seth Grahame-Smith (of later ''[[Pride and Prejudice And Zombies]]'' fame) that details what you should do in the event that you find yourself stuck in a horror movie. In it, you will learn how to [[The Exorcist (Film)|perform an exorcism]], what to do if [[I Know What You Did Last Summer (Film)|you did something last summer]], how to persuade [[Police Are Useless|the skeptical local sheriff]], how to kill [[ChildsChild's Play (TV series)||a murderous doll]], how to survive an [[Alien Invasion]], what to do if [[The Sixth Sense|you've been dead]] [[Dead All Along|since the beginning]] [[It Was His Sled|of the movie]], how to defeat [[Satan]] himself, and many other useful skills. It's divided into six chapters, each devoted to a particular subgenre: an introduction (how to tell that you're in a horror movie, and rules that apply across the genre), [[Slasher Movie|slashers]], evil inanimate objects, the undead (namely [[Our Ghosts Are Different|ghosts]], [[Our Vampires Are Different|vampires]] and [[Zombie Apocalypse|zombies]]), [[Alien Invasion|aliens]] and beasts, and finally, [[Demonic Possession|demonic]] and [[Religious Horror|religious]] evil.

* [[Death Byby Sex]]: Subverted, believe it or not; it's only [[Auto Erotica|having sex]] ''[[Auto Erotica|in a car]]'' that will kill you.

* [[Genre Shift]]: One of the "ejection seats" (quick escapes from the Terrorverse of horror movies) provided is to start acting as though you were in another movie, such as a [[Wacky Fratboy Hijinx|wacky teen comedy]], an [[Le Film Artistique|artsy foreign film]], a [[Period Piece|Merchant-Ivory work]], or a [[Everybody Was Kung -Fu Fighting|Kung-fu]] [[Hong Kong Dub|movie]].

* [[Recycled in Space]]: A horror movie set IN SPACE! is a sign of one of two things. On one hand, you could be in a crappy sequel to a slasher franchise that's [[Jumped the Shark]], in which case you'll probably survive, since the writers are getting really lazy by this point. On the other hand, you could be in a big-budget alien monster movie, and with those high production values (usually) comes a better script than the average horror movie -- andmovie—and trickier, more inventive writers trying to kill you.

* [[Running Gag]]: About just how dangerous log cabins are.

** If only that worked in ''[[I Spit Onon Your Grave]]''...

* [[Self -Deprecation]]: The general low quality, low budgets and [[ClicheCliché Storm|clichéd writing]] that show up in [[SturgeonsSturgeon's Law|many horror movies]] (especially [[Slasher Movie|slashers]]) is a frequent target of parody. One of the "ejection seats" is great, well-written dialogue, and another is fleeing to a location that's far too expensive for the cash-strapped producers of a horror movie to shoot in.

* [[Shout -Out]]: By the boatload, to just about every classic horror movie and to some not-so-classic ones. Some of the scenarios are [[Whole -Plot Reference|Whole Plot References]] to ''[[Snakes Onon a Plane]]'', ''[[Children of the Corn]]'' and ''[[The Exorcist (Film)|The Exorcist]]''.

[[Category:HowLiterature Toof Survivethe A Horror Movie2000s]]