Dean is a tentacle and the playable protagonist of the story.
- Covert Pervert: Parodied. He tries to be one metaphorically and literally, and fails miserably at both attempts.
- Naughty Tentacles: He's a tentacle, it's what he was made for.
- Nice Guy: Once you get past his biological compulsions, he's surprisingly empathic and honorable.
The more irascible and temperamental of the two witches Dean gets to live with.
The nicer and more approachable of the two witches Dean gets to live with.