True Capitalist: Difference between revisions

[[File:CapitolGhost_4186.jpg|frame|[[Catch Phrase|"I am your host, the man they call Ghost."]]<ref>[[Stupid Statement Dance Mix|"I'm a fat fruity bastard, and I'm a nice guy!"]]</ref>]]

 

 

Meet John Conquest, AKA [[Only Known by Their Nickname|Ghost,]] [[Authority in Name Only|King of the Mexicans,]] a racist, tiger shrimp-eating, [[Camp Gay|flamboyant,]] [[Fat Bastard|morbidly obese,]] [[shapeshifting]] [[Canada, Eh?|Canadian]] [[Informed Judaism|Jewish]] [[The Reptilians|lizard]] who [[Domestic Abuse|abuses his family,]] proclaims his love of ''[[My Little Pony]]'', and takes advantage of the welfare system all the while [[Ho Yay|having a torrid affair with Herman Cain]] and pining after [[Sarah Palin]].

* [[Breather Episode]]: The December 24th show can be considered this.

* [[Brick Joke]]: Throughout October, trolls called in wishing Ghost a merry Christmas, causing him to rage that it wasn't even Halloween yet. And then, months later, in the Christmas show...

* [[Butt Monkey]]: Ghost is the butt monkey of his own show!

* [[Camp Gay]]: [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lZjcSA9luic Caller 111]/The Internet Buttstalker, who calls in a ridiculously effeminate voice while making ''very'' suggestive requests.

* [[Canada, Eh?|Canadia, Eh?]]: Ghost seems to have a thing against Canada for some reason...

** According to Ghost he hates Canada because [[Too Soon|they booed the national anthem a few days after 9/11]].

* [[Catch Phrase]]: There are just ''way'' too many things he says on a regular basis:

"[[Blatant Lies|I'M A NICE GUYYY]]!"<br />

"You know it and I know it."<br />

"''x'' ON THE NEXT FREAKIN' [[Geraldo Rivera|GERALDO]]!" }}

** Reactions

"...you're [[Mistaken for Masturbating|playin' with your peter-popper.]]" (or pecker-shaft)<br />

"...Aww, he hung up!"<br />

"My heart's beatin' like a rabbit!" }}

** Rage mode

"THAT'S IT! STICK A FORK IN ME, I'M DONE!"|"GET ME OUTTA HERE, ENGINEER!"}}

** And the Trolls

661 has "[[Product Placement|Surgeradio.org]]"<br />

"Yeah, DDoS that, alright."<br />

** "The idiots from the top are idiots."

** The 'Melting Pot of Racist' splice.

* [[Despair Event Horizon]]: The cancellation of the show at the end of February was this for many trolls.

** [[Hope Spot]]: Ghost came back for two Taco Tuesdays in the middle of March, leading listeners to believe he was genuinely back- but it would be toward the end of April that he would actually resume regular shows.

*** [[Sixth Ranger Traitor]] — Celtic Brony (briefly), Equestrian Citizen

* [[Forced Meme]]: Ghost tried to advocate the use of the term "hambone" to insult what he considers to be overweight people who contribute nothing to society. The trolls gladly helped it become a popular meme... by splicing clips of Ghost calling ''himself'' a hambone.

* [[Game Mod]]: ''True Capitalist [[Doom]]: Bronies on Earth''. Replacing various weapons and powerups with various happenings on the show, such as a "Can crusher" shotgun, a pearl launcher as the rocket launcher, a hadoken for the [[BFG]] or invulnerability being "Chatroom Martial Law". Although the enemy sprites weren't changed, they did receive some voices and names such as the Fruitbowl (Imp) or FU Texas Beast ([[Cyber Demon]], which of course, plays "Fuck You Texas" when it comes out).

** Ghost himself claimed he actually liked the DOOM mod.

* [[I Lied]]: Ghost claimed that his final show would be on March 9th. As it turned out, there was no show on that date, and it was merely an attempt to troll the trolls.

* [[Incoming Ham]]:

** "Ghost baby what's goin' on?!"

** "SUCK MAH DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK, SUCK MAH DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK-"

* [[Jerkass]]: Ghost himself.

** He went off on a rant about members of [[Slipknot]] crying about their bassist's death thus:

* [[Kayfabe]]: No one knows how real some of the more... eccentric... figures on True Capitalist are, but few bother to try and find out, since [[Pass the Popcorn|it's a hell of a lot of fun anyway.]]

* [[Kick the Dog]]: A literal case: Ghost tells one his listeners that he'll respect him if he kicks his dog on [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymfbMcBcVF4&feature=related 27th September 2011].

** There was an instance where a caller callled in multiple times simply repeating "Penispenispenispenispenispenis..."

** The [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o5EsLvSzqGo "Accident-Prone Kids for Ghost."]

* [[Manipulative Editing]]: Its frighteningly easy to make him rage. Just take one of the following sentences (or for bonus points find something he said in the previous episode), and change ''x'' (or a key word in another sentence) to the word of your choice.

** "I happen to have a whole bunch of friends who ''x''/who happen to be ''x''"

* [[Mistaken Identity]]: "Is this Nikolai?!"

** [[Thoroughly Mistaken Identity]]: Someone [[Bullying a Dragon|prank-called]] [[Did You Just Punch Out Cthulhu?|the FBI]] with splices of Ghost's voice, and as a result he sounds completely, hilariously insane:

'''Ghost:''' You cock-eyed Russian. }}

* [[Mondegreen]]: In the November 1 Radio Graffiti segment, a caller, impersonating Twilight Sparkle from [[My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic|My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic]] says "suck my flank" to imitate the "Suck my dick" guy. Ghost mishears it and says "Are you kidding me?! Suck my BLANK?!"

* [[National Stereotypes]]: In his "Guess the Minority" game, Ghost tries to identify the race of the caller by asking questions relating to these (i.e. "What is your favorite food?")

* [[No Ending]]: CelticBrony's [[Xanatos Gambit]] paid off and he 'beat' Ghost, but his victory meant pretty much nothing; Ghost is preparing to implement some new capitalistic ideas in Austin and is spending more time with his wife now, and with him out of the picture, the Ghetto Capitalist Revolution can continue unhindered.

* [[No Except Yes]]: It's not cans, it's "crap on his desk".

** "craponmydesk.wav"?

* [[Opening Narration]]: Near the top of the hour, but always to the effect of "This is the (Second/Third and Final) hour of the True Capitalist Radio broadcast, I am your host, the man they call Ghost."

* [[Overly Long Gag]]: On December 14th, when Engineer hijacked the show, [[Awesome McCoolname|Knee Slappington]], aka the Austin Vibrator, called in with his usual "OOOOOOOOOOOOOO" sound effect. Rather than cutting him off, Engineer let it run for several minutes, even trying to sing along at points.

'''Engineer:''' BAP BAP BAP AWWWWWWWW }}

** This ended when Engineer [[Tear Jerker|broke down]] [[The Woobie|and cried.]]

* [[Overused Running Gag]]: Twitter users continuously made-up names referencing the Texas fire, India and Turkey quakes, and Steve Jobs' death for a time.

* [[Papa Wolf]]: Don't insult his family, especially his grandmother.

** Or KaraszKun.

* [[Pet the Dog]]: On January 6th, 2012, Ghost defends Equestrian Citizen from racial slurs.

* [[Refuge in Audacity]]: The entire show comes off as this. This is the audio adventures of a really [[Large Ham|loud]] Texan and his loyal engineer, and said Texan flips out over prank calls made by the likes of [[Troll|trolls]] playing splices, [[My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic|bronies]], a [[Get Rich Quick Scheme|suburban welfare receiver]], [[Camp Gay|a fabulous man in his tub]], [[Token Minority|an 8 year old Mexican kid]], [[Transsexual|a 'trans-testicle']] and other bizarre characters.

** The twitter shoutouts even more so:

'''Engineer:''' ...guh gaah haaaa? }}

* [[Repurposed Pop Song]]: The ''[[Sanford and Son]]'' theme for the Junkyard America song, and the theme from ''[[The Price Is Right]]'' for Guess the Minority.

** There was a recurring joke throughout the January 20th show that Ghost was every member of the Today Show.

* [[Satan Is Good]]:

* [[Say My Name]]: "DAMN YOU NAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVYYYYYY HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSSKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEE...!"

* [[Schedule Slip]]: Often after an episode with a ''major'' trolling, it'll just go off the air for a period (as little as a day, or as much as a week) and then come back. Although sometimes the show does sometimes doesn't occur for other reasons.

* [[Trademark Favorite Food]]: "Johnnie Walkerrrrr, Blue Labeeeeeel!"

** Shrimp, too, judging by his reaction whenever someone brings the "cannibal shrimp" up.

* [[Troperiffic]]

* [[Troubling Unchildlike Behavior]]: Regular caller Asho smoked weed and looks at pornography, knowing that his mom is elsewhere hitting on strangers.

** In a way, [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MH7lXcUvgwY Melting Pot of Alcohol] is one.

** [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nxurtdJD2eg Angry Racist Jewish Hambone]. Just listen to the lyrics!

He gives those cans a mighty smack! ''*cans.wav*'' }}

** [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TLv9o4mdjdQ National Socialist Hambone Racist]

* [[The Wiki Rule]]: [http://truecapitalist.wikia.com True Capitalist Wiki] on Wikia.

* [[Worthy Opponent]]: Tzeki.

** Ghost's speech while giving Ghetto Capitalist the Troll of the Year Award had hints of this.

* [[You Do NOT Want to Know]]: Gasgara's relationship with Suspicious Tumbleweed. As the [[The Wiki Rule|True Capitalist Radio Wiki]] put it:

* [[Your Approval Fills Me with Shame]]: Trisha, Tub Guy, and Ghetto Capitalist (natch) all approve strongly of Ghost's capitalistic views... but since they're (respectively) a transgender woman, a flamboyant omnisexual, and a welfare abuser, Ghost is absolutely enraged at this hijacking of his philosophy.

* [[Your Mom]]: Sometimes used as a retort.