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{{quote|
''Listen to the DON'TS''
''Listen to the SHOULDN'TS''
''The IMPOSSIBLES, the WON'TS''
''Listen to the NEVER HAVES''
''Then listen close to me-''
''Anything can happen, child''
''ANYTHING can be.'' }}
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* [[All Girls Like Ponies]]: The poem "Little Abigail and the Beautiful Pony". Let's just say it doesn't end well.
* [[An Aesop]]: Quite often, though sometimes sliding into [[Family-Unfriendly Aesop]]. For example, in "The Great Smoke Off":
{{quote|
There's a little golden scroll
That says, "Beware of being the roller
When there's nothing left to roll."'' }}
** And another, from "Perfect High":
{{quote|
Facing another thousand years of talking to God alone. <br />
"It seems, Lord", says Fats, "it's always the same, old men or bright-eyed youth, <br />
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* [[Not a Mask]]: The poem "Best Mask?" is a rare example where the maskless person is the narrator.
* [[Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep]]: Parodied in "Prayer of the Selfish Child".
{{quote|
''I pray the Lord my soul to keep.''
''If I should die before I wake,''
''I pray the Lord my toys to break,''
''So none of the other kids can use 'em...''
''Amen.'' }}
* [[Phony Psychic]]: In the poem "Crystal Ball", the psychic accurately predicts everything her customer ate for lunch, then admits that she only figured it out by {{spoiler|looking at her dress.}}
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