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Mathematician's Answer: Difference between revisions
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If you ask someone a question, and he gives you an entirely accurate answer that is of no practical use whatsoever, he has just given you a Mathematician's Answer.
A common form of giving a [[Mathematician's Answer]] is to fully evaluate the logic of the question and give a logically correct answer. Such a response may prove confusing for someone who interpreted what they said colloquially.
Examples include questions involving "can you do ''[favor]''...?" being interpreted as a hypothetical "are you ''capable of'' doing ''[favor]''?" instead of its more common intent as a request to actually do it (this is a favorite of English teachers and [[Grammar Nazi]], frequently going through something similar to "Can I come in?" "I don't know, ''are you able to''?" "Uh, '''may''' I come in?") Another common form is when a character is asked "Is it A or B?" they will respond, "Yes" as if it was a question of Boolean logic rather than clarifying which specific one is the case (though this can also occur if the responder does not know the answer, or considers both answers correct. This crops up a lot in [[Real Life]], especially in the world of computers.)
Can be used by characters for reasons ranging from [[Played for Laughs|snarky humor]] to intentional obfuscation to being extremely [[Literal Minded]] -- AI and other [[Literal Genie|Literal Genies]] by their nature are very likely to fall into the last category.
Can overlap with [[Shaped Like Itself]] when the question is seeking a description, and with [[Captain Obvious]], as these answers tend to be self-evident for anyone with a brain. Usually doubles as a [[Cryptically Unhelpful Answer]], when the "mathematician" is deliberately trying to confound the questioner. Compare [[Non-Answer]], which is a vague "answer" which does not answer the question at all. Mildly related to [[What's a Henway?]] and [[Not Actually the Ultimate Question]]. And don't forget that the person giving the Mathematician's Answer is [[Futurama|"technically correct ... the best kind of correct."]]
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{{quote|'''Elementary School Math Teacher:''' "How Many Numbers between 1 and 10 are divisible by 2?"
'''Tate:''' [[All of Them|"All Of Them"]]. }}
** Doubles as a [[Captain Obvious]] moment.
* ''[[Return of the Jedi]]'': "R2! What are you doing here?... Well, I can ''see'' you're serving drinks..."
* ''[[The Empire Strikes Back]]'':
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'''Moe:''' Hospital??
'''Shemp:''' Yes, I wanted to be near my mother! }}
* ''[[Austin Powers]]: International Man of Mystery'', when Vanessa finds out just how Austin got plans from one of Dr. Evil's [[Femme Fatales]].
{{quote|'''Vanessa:''' Did you use protection?
'''Austin:''' Of course, I have a 9 millimeter automatic. }}
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* ''[[The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy]]'': When Zaphod learns that Marvin is waiting for them in the car park at the Restaurant at the End of the Universe (and has been for several trillion years), he asks what he's doing there. Marvin's answer? Parking cars. What else would he be doing there?
** More literally: "42". [[You Should Know This Already|For those that don't know about this]], an alien race constructs a massive supercomputer in order to learn "The answer to the question of Life, the Universe, and Everything". The computer, after <s> centuries</s> seven and a half million years of computation, comes back with "42". When asked about this, the computer responds that it is able to figure out the answer, but they need another computer to calculate [[Jeopardy!|what the question is.]] The programmers, afraid of the mob's reaction to this nonsense, just make up the question: "[[Shout-Out|How many roads]] [[Bob Dylan|must a man walk down?]]"
** Arthur has one as well:
{{quote|'''Arthur Dent''': You know, it's at times like this, when I'm stuck in a Vogon airlock with a man from Betelgeuse, about to die of asphyxiation in deep space, that I really wish I'd listened to what my mother told me when I was young.
'''Ford Prefect''': Why? What did she tell you?
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'''Shadow:''' We have to talk about that. I need to know how you did it.
'''Sweeney:''' I did it with panache and style. }}
* ''How Rude!'', an etiquette book aimed at teenagers, contains an anecdote from the author. He attempted to call a friend of his and the friend's five-year-old son answered. When the author asked if his daddy was there, the boy replied, "Yes."
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'''Lawyer:''' ''How'' would you describe your job?
'''Veronica:''' Cleverly. }}
* ''[[That '70s Show]]'' provides this example when 2 state troopers arrive at the Foreman house during a party:
{{quote|'''State Trooper:''' Ma'am, are you the owner of this house?
'''Midge:''' No, I'm not.
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* In ''[[The Sarah Connor Chronicles]]'', this is sometimes how [[Robot Girl|Cameron]] responds to questions.
* An [[Running Gag]] in ''[[Police Squad!]]'', where Frank holds a cigarette out to a witness or suspect and asks "cigarette?" The implication is that he's asking if they want one, but they always answer "Yes, I know," or "Yes, it is."
* ''[[Mock the Week]]'' has a [[Jeopardy!]] parody called ''If This is the Answer, What is the Question?'', which naturally wound up like the ''Jeopardy'' example above on occasion.
* From ''[[House (TV series)|House]]'':
{{quote|'''Masters:''' House, how many prostitutes have you had?
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'''York''': Probably not. It isn't a very common word. }}
* From ''[[Wapsi Square]]'', Shelly gives one when asked where she [http://wapsisquare.com/comic/onmyfront/ got her tattoo.]
* In ''[[8-Bit Theater
{{quote|'''Thief:''' Since when do you care about quests?
'''Black Mage:''' Since it's a convenient excuse to butcher Sir Hopsalot for revenge.
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== Web Original ==
* The Frequently Given Answers page makes a [http://homepage.ntlworld.com/jonathan.deboynepollard/FGA/questions-with-yes-or-no-answers.html serious attempt] to inform unsuspecting answer-seekers how to avoid this trope, when asking questions of places frequented mainly by the overly literal.
* [[The Spoony Experiment|Spoony's]] take on the changes to Yuna between [[Final Fantasy X]] and [[
{{quote|'''Spoony:''' Quite a long way from the traditional kimono she wore before, and her previous characterization as a kind, demure, religious care-giver with a tragic fate. But is this huge change in outfit and characterization because of the radical cultural shift in Spira because of the exposure of Yevon as a maniacal, genocidal cult run by the undead bent on world domination... or just because japanese perverts want to see some cleavage and her cute ass in boy's shorts? Good question... The answer is "Yes".}}
* ''[[Dragon Ball Abridged]]'':
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person A: ''Well, what did he do before he died?''
person B: ''He sorta cluched at his chest and fell over.'' }}
* Dara Ó Briain did a bit about this in one of his stand-up shows, when the audience response to the question "Do you know what Moore's Law is?" was 'yes'.
* There is a story about actress Mae West, who was famous for playing [[The Vamp]].
{{quote|'''Interviewer''': Do you like your men short, tall, fat, or thin?
'''Mae West''': [[Really Gets Around|Yes]]. }}
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* Then there's the old retort to "Can I ask you a question?" "You just did."
** During the trial arc of ''[[Schlock Mercenary]]'', the company lawyer manages, through convoluted wordplay, to ask if he can ask a question without, in fact, asking a question. Petey, duly impressed with this feat, allows it.
* Not so much an example but a possibly interesting piece of related trivia: The "-A or B?; -Yes" joke works in most languages because it's rather typical that only one word is used for both meanings of "or". It doesn't work in languages where there are separate words for them, for example Finnish ("tai" / "vai". The former means "or" as in "is it either A or B?" and the latter as in "which one is it: A or B?")
** In fact, Finnish also has a third word for "or": "eli" meaning specifically "also known as" or "in other words". One wonders if the early Finns just really hated the "or" jokes.
** It's also difficult in Chinese, but for a completely different reason: Chinese does not have all-purpose words for "yes" and "no," instead attaching positive or negative modifiers to the verb in question. If someone asks you even a single-mode question, like "Have you eaten" ("chī fàn le?"), you have to say, "bù chī" (have not eaten) or "chī le" (already ate). ...Okay, people will still throw around "bù" without an attached verb, same as how English speakers will say "Went to the store" with only an implied subject, but it's still a bit harder to be ambiguous.
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** "I'm going up to Portland." "Go ahead. I won't stop you." "Where does this road go?" "Don't go nowhere, mister. Stays right here." "Can I take this road up to Portland?" "Well, sure...but they've got all the roads up to Portland that they need."
** "Sorry to hear they're burying your pa." "Got to. He's dead."
* This joke: A mathematician, a physicist and an engineer are each staying in hotel rooms which individually catch fire. They each have water nearby, so the engineer throws as much water as he can onto the fire and it goes out, then he goes back to bed. The physicist does some quick calculations and throws the exact amount of water necessary onto the fire so that it will go out and he doesn't waste any, and then he goes back to bed. The mathematician does some quick calculations, exclaims "Aha! There is an answer!" and goes back to bed.
* According to an [[Urban Legend]], when the notorious bank robber Wille Sutton was asked why he robbed banks, he replied "Because that's where the money is." He denied ever saying this.
* [http://notalwaysright.com/parts-laboring-the-obvious/18232 This] exchange on [[Not Always Right]]:
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