39,327
edits
Console RPG Cliches 25 to 48: Difference between revisions
update links
m (clean up) |
(update links) |
||
Line 18:
#'''[[Unbreakable Weapons|Indestructible Weapon Rule]]:''' ''No matter how many times you use that sword to strike armored targets or fire that gun on full auto mode it will never break, jam or need any form of maintenance [[Gameplay and Story Segregation|unless it is critical to the story that the weapon breaks, jams or needs maintenance]].''
#'''[[Insurmountable Waist-Height Fence|Selective Paralysis]]:''' ''Your characters must always keep both feet on the ground and will be unable to climb over low rock ledges, railings, chairs, cats, slightly differently-colored ground, or any other trivial objects which may happen to be in their way. Note that this condition will not prevent your characters from [[Cutscene Power to the Max|jumping from railroad car to railroad car later in the game.]]''
#'''[[Trauma Inn|Bed Bed Bed:]]''' ''A good night's sleep will cure all wounds, diseases, and disabilities, up to and including death in battle.''
#'''[[Villain Exit Stage Left|You Can't Kill Me, I Quit]] ([[Final Fantasy VIII|Seifer]] Rule):''' ''The good guys never seem to get the hang of actually arresting or killing the bad guys. Minor villains are always permitted to [[So Long, Suckers!|go free so they can rest up and menace you again later]] -- [[Recurring Boss|sometimes five minutes later]]. Knowing this rule, you can deduce that if you do manage to kill (or force the surrender of) a bad guy, you must be getting near the end of the game.''
#'''[[Bond Villain Stupidity|And Now You Die, Mr. Bond!]] ([[Final Fantasy IX|Beatrix]] Rule):''' ''Fortunately for you, the previous rule also applies in reverse. Rather than kill you when they have you at their mercy, the villains will settle for merely [[HP to One|blasting you down to 1 hit point]] and leaving you in a crumpled heap while they stroll off, [[Evil Laugh|laughing]]. (This is, of course, because they're already planning ahead how they'll [[Xanatos Gambit|manipulate you into doing their bidding later in the game]] -- see [[Nice Job Breaking It, Hero|Way To Go, Serge.]])''
#'''Zap!''' ''Most villains in [[RPG]]s possess some form of [[Teleporters and Transporters|teleportation]]. They generally use it to [[Teleporting Keycard Squad|materialize in front of the adventurers when they reach the Obligatory Legendary Relic Room]] and seize the goodies just before you can. [[Fridge Logic|The question]] "If the bad guy can teleport anywhere at any time, then why doesn't (s)he just zip in, grab the artifact, and leave before the adventurers have even finished the nerve-wracking puzzle on the third floor?" is never answered.''
#'''[[Heads I Win, Tails You Lose]] ([[Xenogears|Grahf]] Rule):''' ''[[Story Overwrite|It doesn't matter]] that you won the fight with the boss monster; the evil task he was trying to carry out will [[Xanatos Gambit|still get accomplished somehow]]. Really, [[You Can't Fight Fate|you might as well not have bothered.]]''
#'''[[Failure Is the Only Option|Clockwork Universe Rule]]:''' ''No matter how hard you try to stop it, that comet or meteor will always hit the earth.''
#'''[[Your Princess Is in Another Castle|Fake Ending]]:''' ''There will be a [[Disc One Final Dungeon|sequence which pretends to be the end of the game but obviously isn't]] -- if for no other reason than because you're [[Spoiled by the Format|still on Disk 1 of 4]].''
#'''[[Disc One Final Boss|You Die, And We All Move Up In Rank]]:''' ''During that fake ending, the [[The Man Behind the Man|true villain]] of the story will [[Dying to Be Replaced|kill the guy you'd thought was the villain]], just to demonstrate what a badass he (the true villain) really is. [[The Unfought|You never get to kill the fake villain yourself.]]'' (See also [[Hijacked by Ganon]])
#'''"[[Saving the World|What are we going to do tonight,]] [[Wild
#'''[[The Legend of Zelda|Zelda's]] [[Gotta Catch Them All|Axiom]]:''' ''Whenever somebody tells you about [[Cosmic Keystone|"the five ancient talismans" or "the nine legendary crystals" or whatever]], you can be quite confident that [[Saving the World]] will require you to go out and find [[Plot Coupon|every last one of them]].''
#'''George W. Bush Geography Simplification Initiative:''' ''Every country in the world will have exactly one town in it, except for the country you start out in, which will have three.'' (Related to [[It's a Small World After All]])
Line 45:
{{reflist}}
[[Category:The Grand List of Console Role Playing Game Cliches]]
[[Category:
| |||