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Console RPG Cliches 169 to 192: Difference between revisions
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Return to [[The Grand List of Console Role Playing Game Cliches]]
#'''[[Gilligans Island|Gilligan's]] Prescription:''' ''Any character who has [[Laser
#'''[[Luke, I Am Your Father|Luke, I Am Your]] [[Dead Horse Trope|Tedious, Overused Plot Device]] ([[Chrono Cross (Video Game)|Lynx]] Rule):''' ''If there is any chance whatsoever that major villain X could be the male lead's father, then it will turn out that major villain X is the male lead's father.''
#'''[[Final Fantasy VI|World of]] Mild Inconvenience:''' ''The devastating plague, noxious gas, planet-obliterating meteor or other [[After the End|large-scale disaster]] that led to the death of millions will affect your party (and your party's friends and family members) in no way whatsoever, save that [[Putting the Band Back Together|a few party members may become lost and you can find them later]].''
#'''[[Final Fantasy VII|Golden Chocobo]] [[Too Awesome to Use|Principle]]:''' ''There will be at least one [[Infinity
#'''[[Guide Dang It|Golden Chocobo Corollary]]:''' ''The magic formula for acquiring this supreme upgrade will be only vaguely alluded to in the game itself. Ideally, you're supposed to [[Guide Dang It|shell out $19.95 for the strategy guide instead.]]''
#'''[[Sorting Algorithm of Weapon Effectiveness|Flow of Goods Rule]]:''' ''The quality of goods in the world is dependent upon the shop's distance from the final dungeon. It doesn't matter if the [[First Town|town you start in]] has a huge thriving economy and is the [[Capital City|center of world trade]], it will always have the game's worst equipment; and even if that village near the end is isolated and has only three people in it, it will have the game's best equipment.''
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#'''[[Pull the Thread|The Best-Laid Schemes:]]''' ''The final villain's grand scheme will have involved the deaths of thousands or even millions of innocent people, the clever manipulation of governments, armies, and entire populations, and will have taken anywhere from five to five thousand years to come to fruition. The hero will come up with a method of undoing this plan forever in less than five minutes.'' (Compare [[Spanner in The Works]])
#'''[[Pyrrhic Victory]]:''' ''By the time you've gotten it in gear, dealt with your miscellaneous personal crises and are finally ready to go Save the World once and for all, nine-tenths of it will already have been destroyed. Still, you've got to give your all to save the remaining one-tenth.''
#'''Poetic Villain Principle ([[Final Fantasy VI|Kefka]] Rule):''' ''All villains will suddenly become [[Poetic Serial Killer|poets]], [[Nietzsche Wannabe|philosophers]], and/or [[Large Ham|dramatic actors]] when a) [[Establishing Character Moment|they first meet the hero]], b) [[Just Between You and Me|they are about to win or their evil plan is finally ready]], c) [[Wham Episode|some major event in the game is about to begin]], d) [[Pre
#'''[[Cosmic Deadline|Compression of Time:]]''' ''As you approach the final confrontation with the villain, events will become increasingly awkward, contrived and disconnected from one another -- almost as if [[Writer On Board|some cosmic Author]] was running up against a deadline and had to [[Ass Pull|slap together the ending at the last minute]].''
#'''[[No Hero Discount|Adam Smith's Revenge:]]''' ''By the end of the game you are [[Famed in Story|renowned everywhere]] as the Legendary Heroes, every surviving government and [[Reasonable Authority Figure|authority figure]] has rallied behind you, the fate of the world is obviously hanging in the balance, and [[Hundred Percent Heroism Rating|out of nowhere random passers-by give you a pat on the back and heartfelt good luck wishes]]. However, shopkeepers won't even give you a discount, much less free supplies for the final battle with evil.''
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#'''The Long Arm of the Plot:''' ''Any bad guys, no matter how far they run, will always end up in one of two ways by the end of the game: [[Karmic Death|obviously dead,]] or [[Heel Face Turn|on your side.]] [[Black and White Morality|There is no in-between]].''
#'''[[Take Your Time|Apocalypse Any Time Now]]:''' ''The best time to do side quests is while the huge meteor hovers in the sky above the planet, waiting to fall and destroy the world.'' (Compare [[Sidetracked By the Gold Saucer]])
#'''"So, [[Star Fox (Video Game)|Andross]], [[One
#'''[[Bishonen Line|In Your Face, Jesus!]]:''' ''Even if you manage to deal with him that time, you're not done -- the villain will then transform into his final form, which is always an [[Power Gives You Wings|angelic winged figure]] with background music remixed for [[Ominous Latin Chanting|ecstatic chorus]] and [[Ominous Pipe Organ|pipe organ.]]''
#'''The Moral Of The Story ([[Lunar|Ghaleon]] Rule):''' ''Every problem in the universe can be solved by finding the right [[White
#'''[[Bonus Boss|Weapon Rule]]:''' ''There's always [[That One Boss|a hidden creature who is much harder to defeat]] than even the ultimate bad guy's final, world-annihilating form. It's lucky for all concerned that this hidden creature prefers to stay hidden rather than trying to take over the world himself, because he'd probably win. As a corollary, [[Awesome but Impractical|whatever reward you get for killing the hidden creature is basically worthless]] because [[Bragging Rights Reward|by the time you're powerful enough to defeat him, you don't need it any more]].''
#'''[[Penultimate Weapon|The Ultimate Rule]]:''' ''Anything called "Ultima (whatever)" or "Ultimate (whatever)" isn't. There's always at least one thing somewhere in the world which is even more.''
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