Talking Weapon: Difference between revisions
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{{trope}}
[[File:eyelander.jpg|link=Team Fortress 2
{{quote|''As a weapon, Lilarcor has its uses, but many a warrior has eventually given it away. Banter such as "Ouch, that musta hurt", "Oh yeah! Got 'im good", and "Beware my bite for it might...might...might really hurt or something" is a constant barrage on a warrior's psyche.''
[[Exactly What It Says
[[Tropes Are Not Good|It might get annoying,]] though. If the weapon ''[[Most Annoying Sound|won't shut up]]'', the wielder may feel [[Blessed
{{examples}}▼
▲{{examples}}
== [[Anime]]
* The staffs in ''[[Shigofumi]]''.
* The various [[Swiss Army Weapon|Intelligent and Armed Devices]] in ''[[Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha]]'' not only speak, they speak in [[Surprisingly Good English|surprisingly well-pronounced]] [[Gratuitous English|English]] [[Gratuitous German|and German]]. (Although their fluency gets better as the franchise proceeds; Raising Heart speaks a few dozen words in broken English in the first series, while two seasons later Reinforce Zwei has a college-student's vocabulary and grammar.)
* Yuri has a talking sword (or at least one that constantly moans) in ''[[Kyo Kara Maoh
* Derflinger from ''[[
* Babbo in ''[[MAR]]'' is a talking flail... or maybe cup-and-ball game.
* Every weapon character in ''[[Soul Eater]]'' could count as this, seeing as they are humans who have taken a weapon form. However, the other weapons aren't nearly as... talkative... or annoying... as Excalibur is. Seriously.
** When Ragnarok is in its sword form, it fits nicely into this trope. Not only can Ragnarok speak, it has a mean [[Make Me Wanna Shout|scream attack]].
** Excalibur is also a talking sword, though more of the [[Cloudcuckoolander]] type, and he's usually only in sword form when being used or store in the stone. Excalibur talks. And talks. And
*** And sings.
**** [[Small Annoying Creature|EXCALIBUUUUR!]] [[Most Annoying Sound|EXCALIBUUUUR!!!]]
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* In ''[[Last Fantasy]]'', a character wields a sword with an eye that screams for souls which appears to be a [[Captain Ersatz]] of [[Soul Calibur|Soul Edge]]... but turns out to be an overpriced novelty item he bought in the last town.
* Haganemaru in ''[[Kurogane]]'' is capable of speech, which is useful, as its wielder ''isn't''.
* Sou'unga in the third ''[[Inuyasha]]'' movie, ''Swords of an Honorable Ruler'', is an evil youkai sword that
* The more powerful Demon Swords from ''[[The Sacred Blacksmith]]'' are [[Exaggerated Trope|this trope taken to the eleven]]. Not only they speak, they have personality and ponder about the meaning of their existence and their relationship to humans. Oh, and they can take human form too (i.e. beautiful ''women,'' [[Sarcasm Mode|bet you didn't see that one coming huh?]]).
* In ''[[Durarara!!]]'', the cursed blade Saika speaks only [[Hearing Voices|in its owner's mind]], but [[Madness Mantra|''continually'']]. About love. [[Sex Is Violence|Which it assimilates to slashing people]]. Have we mentioned it's said to be cursed because it makes its owners crazy?
* ''[[Bleach]]'': The only one we see in detail is Zangetsu when communicating with Ichigo in Ichigo's inner world. However, it's considered standard that shinigami must learn how to communicate with their [[Empathic Weapon|zanpakutou]] and that zanpakutou have thoughts and feelings of their own that they do communicate with their shinigami. Even though the manga doesn't detail the conversations that occur (only suggesting them and hinting at them), the process of communication is called Jinzen. We also see Zabimaru manifest and talk to Renji at one point and Zangetsu once asks if Ichigo can hear Kenpachi's zanpakutou screaming in pain because of how Kenpachi ignores it (Ichigo can). When Lilinette transforms into Stark's weapon, she continues to talk to him, making her an example of this trope as well, at least for a while.
* Maken Arabuki in ''[[Sengoku Youko]]''.
== [[Comic Books]] ==
* ''[[Buck Godot: Zap Gun for Hire]]'' has the [https://web.archive.org/web/20150428205457/http://www.airshipentertainment.com/buckcomic.php?date=20070201 Loquacious Lasers, Smith and Wesson], who are the minds behind the Pistol Packin' Polaris Packrat's exploits. Also, presumably Buck's Junior (but he doesn't talk to them anymore).▼
== Comics ==▼
▲* ''[[Buck Godot Zap Gun for Hire]]'' has the [http://www.airshipentertainment.com/buckcomic.php?date=20070201 Loquacious Lasers, Smith and Wesson], who are the minds behind the Pistol Packin' Polaris Packrat's exploits. Also, presumably Buck's Junior (but he doesn't talk to them anymore).
* The Singing Sword (Sister Blade of [[Excalibur]] of ''[[Prince Valiant]]'') is this trope taken seriously; it sung (probably along the lines of a [[Cherubic Choir]]) whenever wielded by [[Only the Pure of Heart]]. After this, the concept was never taken seriously, ever again.
* Smax from ''[[Top Ten]]'' has a singing sword that he usually hides under a cloth (both because it's annoying and because he doesn't like to talk about his homeland). When he goes into battle in his [[Smax|self-titled mini-series]], the sword starts singing ABBA.
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* ''[[The Helm]]'' features a slight twist on this - as you can imagine, it's the hero's ''helmet'' that talks. And only he can hear it. There's some question as to whether or not he's simply insane, but he reasons that if this were some delusional fantasy his magic talking helmet wouldn't be so mean to him.
* Carvin' Marvin and Tremble from ''[[Knights of the Dinner Table]]''.
* Issue #1 of ''[[Roach Balls]]'' introduced Julio, the talking switchblade.
== [[Fan Works]] ==
* In ''[[
==
* The Acme singing sword from the movie ''[[Who Framed Roger Rabbit?]]''.▼
▲* In ''[[With Strings Attached (Fanfic)|With Strings Attached]]'', [[BFS|Blackfire]] mostly just whines like a mosquito, but when the Hunter tries to throw it over a cliff at the urging of the four, it starts to scream “STAY AWAY, HUMANSSSS!” at the four. And he finds he can't let go of it....
** Which, in addition to being [[No Celebrities Were Harmed|a caricature of Frank Sinatra]], was a [[Shout
▲* The Acme singing sword from the movie ''[[Who Framed Roger Rabbit]]''.
▲** Which, in addition to being [[No Celebrities Were Harmed|a caricature of Frank Sinatra]], was a [[Shout Out]] to [[Bugs Bunny/Characters|Bugs Bunny]]'s singing sword in "Knighty Knight Bugs".
** ''Wicked witchcraft... and although I know it's strictly taboo...'' Sorry, couldn't resist.
* Rare non-fantasy example: the Lawgivers in the ''[[Judge Dredd]]'' film talk to confirm weapon choices and give their status. However, they don't have the sentience of most weapons on this page: Those are just vocal messages.
== [[Literature]] ==▼
* In ''[[
== Gamebooks ==▼
{{quote|
* Excalibur Junior (a.k.a. "E.J.") from the ''[[Grail Quest]]'' Solo Fantasy books.▼
▲== Literature ==
▲* In ''[[Discworld (Literature)/The Colour of Magic|The Colour of Magic]]'' (both the book and the miniseries), Rincewind comes across Kring, a talking sword that tries to help him save Twoflower from Wyrmburg. It had very definite ideas about how its wielder should act, threatening to kill Rincewind if he didn't do the suitably heroic thing, by pointing itself at his neck. The sword disappears afterwards and its current whereabouts are unknown, although it may have been dropped overboard from the back of a dragon flying at great height above a very deep sea. Whoops.
▲{{quote| "What I'd really like is to be a ploughshare. I don't know what that is, but [[Call to Agriculture|it sounds like an existence with some point to it]]."}}
** There was also Imp/Buddy's harp, which (as the focal point of The Music) didn't talk, but definitely had a mind of its own.
* In ''[[The Silmarillion]]'', Turin Turambar has a "to be or not to be" moment where he asks his cursed sword, Gurthang, if it would take his life swiftly. The sword answers yes, so Turin kills himself. This is overtly taken from Kullervo's death in ''[[The Kalevala]]'' (see the Myths folder below).
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* In the [[Forgotten Realms]] novel ''Elfsong'' Danilo Thann owns a singing sword. He taught it a [[Bawdy Song|song]] about a knight who [[Be Careful What You Wish For|wished]] for a more impressive lance.
** Khazid'hea from the Drizzt novels can speak only telepathically to its current wielder, and often chooses not to do that. It desires to be wielded by the strongest warrior, and is capable of changing the shape of its pommel to make itself more appealing to a new wielder. It angsted for a while over its inability to alter the shape of its blade, since its desired wielder Drizzt fought with a scimitar instead.
** Dzeldazzar, "Defender of the Innocent" from ''[
* It's more than just a weapon, but the black ka'kari in ''[[The Night Angel Trilogy]]'' eventually becomes fairly talkative, and at one point, it refuses a command. Given that it choses its own master and is supposedly highly intelligent, it seems fairly likely that it's the ka'kari which humors its owner rather than the other way around.
* Craig Shaw Gardner's ''Wuntvor'' books have Cuthbert, a talking sword who's a total coward and wails pretty loudly about all this blood and ichor everyone insists on drenching him in.
* Nightblood in ''[[Warbreaker]]'' is a sword that not only speaks (telepathically) nearly constantly, but is also something of a [[Deadpan Snarker]]. He also reads minds and seems to think any thought he picks up was directed at him.
* In L. Jagi Lamplighter's ''[[
* ''[[
* In [[Stephen Hunt]]'s ''The Court Of The Air'', there is a talking sword that is actually wise and generous.
== [[Live-Action TV]] ==▼
▲== Live-Action TV ==
* Tommy's sword Saba spoke in season 2 and 3 of ''[[Mighty Morphin Power Rangers]]''. He gradually shut up as time passed. ITTRC, he was snarky and British. Definitely snarky, though.
** Carried over from Japanese counterpart ''[[Super Sentai|Gosei Sentai Dairenger]]''.
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** ''Den-O'' also has the DenKamen Sword, through which the Taros can speak, and the Denebick Buster, which is Deneb turned into a [[More Dakka|energy machinegun]] and therefore The Gun That Speaks.
** Later ''Den-O'' movies make this Kotaro (New Den-O)'s gimmick; rather than being possessed by the Taros, they turn into Weapons That Speak for him to wield. ''Episode Blue'' shows Urataros and Kintaros turning into a talking [[Epic Flail|fishing rod]] and [[An Axe to Grind|axe]] respectively, and ''Let's Go Kamen Rider'' will add the Momotasword to the mix.
* The Moment, an apocalyptic weapon that the Doctor intends to use to end the Time War in the 2013 ''[[Doctor Who]]'' 50th Anniversary special ''The Day of the Doctor'', manifests an interface in the form of Rose Tyler, and spends a great deal of time talking to him about why and how he plans to use it.
== [[Music]] ==▼
▲== Music ==
* As described in the Blue Oyster Cult song "Black Blade" (based on the ''Elric'' stories, though the sword doesn't talk until after {{spoiler|it turns into a demon}} on the last page of the last story.).
== [[Oral Tradition]], [[Folklore]], Myths and Legends ==
* The sword of Kullervo from the Finnish epic ''[[The Kalevala]]'' talks. The sword is not a chatterbox though; it speaks only once and then just before Kullervo is about to kill himself with it, making its point that it enjoys [[Artifact of Doom|drinking blood regardless of whether it's innocent or guilty]]. Otherwise, the sword is unremarkable and unnamed.
* [[Older Than Print]]: The following incident is from [[Irish Mythology]]'s ''Battle of Magh Tuireadh'':
{{quote|
== [[Tabletop Games]] ==
=== Card Games ===
* ''[[Dungeons and Dragons]]'' has rules for intelligent weapons, including how well they can communicate (e.g. starting with simple "empathy" and going all the way to full-blown telepathic powers)... as well as rules for conflicts of wills between weapon and wielder. The stock intelligent weapons described in the manual range all over the power and alignment spectrums... including one sword that is recommended for a deaf swordsman.▼
* The Singing and Dancing Sword from ''[
** Intelligent weapons in other media based on D&D (R. A. Salvatore's ''[[Forgotten Realms]]'' novels, ''[[Baldurs Gate]]'') tend to break some of these rules because, quite sensibly, they're more concerned with finding a wielder who'll suit their purposes than one who has the same alignment as the rules demand. Thus, Khazid'hea, though [[Evil Weapon|apparently evil and certainly not good]], wants to be wielded by the greatest warrior, ie. Drizzt Do'Urden (at first), who's [[Chaotic Good]]. Lilarcor, on the other hand, who seems to be [[Chaotic Neutral]], doesn't refuse to be wielded by anyone because it just wants to kill things.▼
▲=== Gamebooks ===
▲* Excalibur Junior (a.k.a. "E.J.") from the ''[[Grail Quest]]'' Solo Fantasy books.
=== Tabletop RPGs ===
▲* ''[[Dungeons
▲** Intelligent weapons in other media based on D&D (R. A. Salvatore's ''[[Forgotten Realms]]'' novels, ''[[
*** The rules in 3d Edition noted that it wasn't alignment ''per se'' that triggered conflicts of will between the weapon and the wielder, but rather the purpose of the weapon and the intentions of the wielder coming into conflict. Alignment just tended to be a fair guide to just how much risk there was for those two to diverge.
* Some Daemon weapons in ''[[Warhammer 40000]]'' fit this trope. ''You do not want to listen to them.'' Unless you're evil, in which case listen away -- many are full of sound advice.▼
** Some particularly powerful Daemon Weapons can exert limited Telekinesis. [[Big Bad|Abbadon]]'s sword, for instance, once got him wounded by pulling him towards Eldrad -- while he was impaled on Eldrad's force weapon.▼
* ''[[GURPS]]: Thaumatology'' has rules for how intelligent weapons communicate, ranging from simple emotional impressions to mind control.
* A somewhat disturbing example is a soulforged weapon from ''[[Wraith: The Oblivion]]''. Most believe the process of soulforging destroys the consciousness of the victim, but that's small comfort when that fancy new battle-axe starts weeping.
▲* The Singing and Dancing Sword from ''[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/TabletopGame/Munchkin?from=Game.Munchkin Munchkin]''. Useful since you don't need any hands to wield it so you can add it even if you're carrying other items.
=== War Games ===
▲* Some Daemon weapons in ''[[Warhammer
▲** Some particularly powerful Daemon Weapons can exert limited Telekinesis. [[Big Bad|Abbadon]]'s sword, for instance, once got him wounded by pulling him towards
== [[Video Games]] ==
* Caliburn from ''[[Sonic and The Black Knight]]'', who also serves as an [[Exposition Fairy]] for [[Sonic the Hedgehog|Sonic]].
* The Swordians from ''[[
* As the above quote illustrates, Lilarcor from ''[[
{{quote|
'''Lilarcor:''' Because you've got the grip and I've got the rip! [[Evil Laugh|Mwahahahahahahahaha!]] }}
* In ''[[Devil May Cry]] 3'', Dante gets a pair of talking swords that he soon tells to shut up. Notable in that most of his weapons were former demons, but aren't too talkative; Agni and Rudra, however, ''started'' as swords.
** The remain silent because Dante told them to keep quiet, but their voices can be heard when using one of their more powerful combos, calling out ''"Ashes to Ashes, Dust to Dust"''.
* In ''[[Disgaea 4:
* Exor in ''[[
* The Azure and Crimson Azoths from ''[[Atelier
* The snarky Star Dragon Sword from the ''[[Suikoden]]'' series.
* All the [[Infinity+1 Sword|Relic Weapons]] in ''[[Final Fantasy XI]]'' speak at least once, although Guttler talks regularly when in the hands of its [[Time Travel|previous owner]]... its hobbies include [[Blood Knight|blood, cutting, and dissection.]] [[Crowning Moment of Funny|Its prior owner even tells it to shut up on occasion, then turns to you and nervously pretends she didn't say anything.]]
* Enserric the Longsword in ''[[Neverwinter Nights]]: Hordes of the Underdark'', who has an insult prepared for almost any type of enemy you encounter. {{spoiler|He is also somewhat of a [[Deadly Upgrade]], at least when he insists on rearranging your stats.}}
* [[Catgirl|Xiao]]'s slingshot Steve in ''[[
** Steve the [[Humongous Mecha|Ridepod]] from ''Dark Cloud 2'' can get a speech upgrade, but it just uses it to yell [[Most Annoying Sound|PIECE OF CAKE!]] over and over.
* [[Cute Witch|Yoriko's]] [[Simple Staff|staff]], Mike in ''[[
* Corrupted Ashbringer from ''[[World of Warcraft]]'' whispers to you when you're close enough to Darion while he's carrying it. It's [[Nightmare Fuel|quite unnerving]] at times if you don't see it coming.
** Corrupted Ashbringer once was a useable item, and the ghost of Mograine would whisper to the wielder through it.
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* The Seventh Scripture in ''[[Tsukihime]]''/''Kagetsu Tohya'' carries the spirit of a half-unicorn, half-teenaged girl inside it. So it's capable of talking to those who either get their blood stained on it or have potent magical potential. Or Shiki/Arihiko's sister. Er. Anyway, mostly what she does is complain about Ciel's treatment of her. And no, it's not exactly a sword, but it ''is'' an annoying weapon that talks too much. She also loves carrots.
* ''[[Dungeon Crawl]]'' has a weapon attribute aptly described as "It makes noises.", which may be applied to any random artifact weapon, meaning you might find talking specimens of pretty much any kind of weapon present in the game. Any such weapon will cause noises at irregular intervals while wielded; most of these noises are recognizable speech. Far from being a harmless annoyance for the player, the noise also tends to alert nearby hostiles to the wielder's presence.
* ''[[Castlevania: Symphony of the Night]]'' has an odd example in the Sword Familiar. Once it reaches a certain level, it can be equipped as a normal sword and stays quiet. Its more common form, though, is a floating sword [[Fairy Companion|that fights alongside Alucard]], and in that form it shouts victoriously and taunts the enemies (and Alucard himself, at lower levels).
* Depicted above: the ''[[
* The Axe from ''[[The
* ''[[Mabinogi (
* ''[[
* ''[[
* The Onyx Blade in ''[[Soul Nomad]]'' talks during the opening sequence due to the [[Sealed Evil in
* Beginning with ''[[Borderlands 2]]'', the franchise introduces a number of talking guns with a variety of personalities.
** One of the most notorious is “Boganella, the talking Shotgun” which fires off a volley of obscenities when being fired or reloaded, all in an Australian accent.
▲== [[Web Comics]] ==
== Web Comics ==▼
* Torg's magic sword, Chazz, in ''[[Sluggy Freelance]]'', activated in the arc That Which Redeems, and used frequently thereafter. Notable in that it must drink the blood of the innocent for it to speak.
{{quote|
* There's a stuck-up teenage emo sword in ''[[
* Blackshard, the talking
* The Cursing Axe in ''[[Once Upon A Table]]''.
* The heroine of ''[[Mixed Myth]]'' obtains a sword that has the voice and personality of dog.
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* A variation in ''[[Tales of the Questor]]'': before it was named Wildcard, Quentynn's sword kept saying an advertising pitch for the merchant he got it from. At the most inappropriate times.
* ''[[Nodwick]]''
** In one strip Yeagar is duelling some other adventurer, while both are armed with talking swords. [https://web.archive.org/web/20120211200401/http://nodwick.humor.gamespy.com/gamespyarchive/index.php?date=2007-02-14 Their weapons make small talk throughout the fight], completely ignoring what their wielders are doing with them...
** In [https://web.archive.org/web/20070623181458/http://nodwick.humor.gamespy.com/gamespyarchive/index.php?date=2002-03-13 another story] the group is plundering several intelligent weapons with personal agendas (a hammer that hates giantkind, a trident gunning for enemies of the sea, and a black sword that just likes to kill things) and make Nodwick carry everything. When the party encounters enemies that fall into all three categories, [[Powers Via Possession|the weapons push Nodwick into a raging frenzy and he goes to town on them]].
* Discussed in [[The Rant]] of this ''[[Darths and Droids]]'' [http://www.darthsanddroids.net/episodes/0421.html strip].
{{quote|
Is that the perfect game mechanic or what? [[Gary Gygax|Gary]], we are humbled by your boundless game mastering genius. }}
* Oruuka from ''[[Fiyora Nya]]'' due to pretty much being a [[Soul Jar|soul jar.]]
* In ''[[Schlock Mercenary]]'' S.I. (which is euphemism for "AI stupid enough that [[Just a Machine|it's okay to treat it as a disposable device]]") are used in many heavy munitions and advanced personal weapons. [[Stun Guns|M3 incapacitator]] is well within this category, because to be <s>useless</s> guaranteed non-lethal, it needs to identify target species on the fly and consider tactical situation, and often also ''build'' appropriate munitions then and there. It's capable of arguing with the user. When one of "potato guns" was given an enema of milspec [[Nanomachines|nanoassemblers]] and slap from high-powered AI to transform it into a miniature superweapon (capable of hacking ''other'' M3 into [[Attack Drone]]s, among the other tricks), it also became smart enough that now it [http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2015-03-19 counts as "sapient"] and legally cannot be just turned off. It's evidently sapient enough to choose for itself a new form that isn't ugly. And when they say Captain Landon "have taken a shining to it", you don't need to bother with [[Cargo Ship]]ping - [http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2015-03-25 they are already flirty].
* The axe from ''[[Unforgotten Realms]]'' speaks in a French accent, apparently. It turns out he was originally a lumberjack/wizard who was transmogrified into an axe, then brainwashed so he thought that he'd been an axe all along.
* Destiny's Wave, from the ''[[Whateley Universe]]''. It is the magical weapon of Bladedancer, the Handmaid of the Tao, and is a jade ''jian'' that can cut through pretty much anything. It has the soul of a great woman warrior sealed inside it, and seems perfectly willing to talk to Bladedancer's friends too.
* ''[[Journey Quest]]'''s Sword of Fighting speaks. Generally in a fashion insulting to it's wielder. The weapon itself may be [[Ax Crazy]], which seems odd for a sword.
* ''[[
* ''[[The Intercontinental Union of Disgusting Characters]]'', being a [[Take That]] at 1st Edition ''[[Dungeons
* [http://johnsu.deviantart.com/art/Mountain-Bandit-109099016 Bartow Laughingbones and his "Pretty Betty"]. [[Invoked Trope|Invoked]] in that a wizard hoped it will discourage the guy. But the talking axe not only enjoys "her" work, but turns out to be good company (at least for lonely mountain bandit), so this plan backfired.
== [[Western Animation]] ==▼
* Lula the sword from ''[[Dave the Barbarian]]''. Talking weapons show up often in that show. Owning one is treated as akin to dating or
▲== Western Animation ==
* ''[[Earthworm Jim (
▲* Lula the sword from ''[[Dave the Barbarian]]''. Talking weapons show up often in that show. Owning one is treated as akin to dating or marriage -- so Lula is understandably upset when one of her old owners turns up (after having carelessly abandoned her years ago), begs her to come back, then gets bored with her and runs off with another sword.
* In the ''[[Rick and Morty]]'' episode "The ABCs of Beth", one of the [[My Little Panzer|"toys"]] from Beth's childhood is a pink switchblade with a sentient AI and [[Cute Is Evil| a cutsey voice]]; it is ''very'' glad to see the now-adult Beth, anxious for a chance to kill again - and it does, later in the episode.
▲* ''[[Earthworm Jim (Animation)|Earthworm Jim]]'' did a parody episode about this. Jim gets a talking sword in a sandwich that claims to have been owned by all the great heroes. Eventually it's revealed that it's never actually done anything significant.
* In ''[[
* The ''[[Muppet Babies]]'' acted out a fantasy [[Rags to Riches]] story where Piggy had to go on a quest to find a "Singing Sword", which never shut up until she shoved a sock in its mouth... and then wouldn't sing until she told it ''what song'' to sing.
{{quote|
* [[Looney Tunes]]: In "Knighty Knight Bugs", Bugs is tasked to retrieve a singing sword.
* In one episode of ''[[Mad Jack the Pirate]]'' Mad Jack and his crew, which consists entirely of an anthropomorphic rat that is several times more competent than his captain, are tasked with
{{reflist}}
[[Category:Older Than Radio]]
[[Category:This Index Has a Mind of Its Own]]
[[Category:Weapons and Wielding Tropes]]
[[Category:
▲[[Category:Trope]]
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