The Weekenders/Funny

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


  • "To Tish":
    • Carvel keeps calling Tino "pumpkin pie".

Tish: If I call Tino "Pumpkin Pie", pretty soon everyone will doing it.
Tino: Don't sweat it. This kind of thing never catches on.
Carver: You tell him Pumpkin Pie.
Tino: DO NOT!
Carver: Pumpkin Pie is right.
Tino: You are teetering on the precipicle with that Pumpkin Pie thing, my friend!!
Carver: Precipus? Man, you are dishin' a Tish.
Carver: I know exactly what you mean Pumpkin Pie.
Tino: Enough with the Pumpkin Pie! Man! It's like your saying "Tino, please put these chili fries down my pants!"

Tish: I'm going home before I'll say something I'll regret.
Lor: Like what?
Tish: Like you're a bunch of insensitive guttersnipes.
Carver: She definitely would've regreted that.
Tino: Oh yeah.
Lor: Good thing she didn't say it.

    • Then that bit where it's even caught on with her favorite television show.
  • The Awful Weekend has this gem:

Lor: I heard the dinosaurs are SO realistic, you can't tell the real ones from the robots! -pause- Ooohh...

  • The Talent Show:

Tish: I'm not jealous! I don't have a jealous bone in my body!
Carver: Do you have any jealous internal organs?
Tish: NO!

    • Lor repeatedly saying "Cantaloupe" instead of "Antelope" when singing "Home on the Range".
  • Dinner Party:
    • Tish wants to have a "sophisticated dinner-party", which the others are trying to get out of:

Lor: Now, all we have to do is let Princess (Carver's dog) lick us on the lips. We come down with some kinda "dog flu" and have to go to the vetenary E.R! It's foolproof.
Carver: I think I'm gonna pass on this, for the obvious reason THAT I'M NOT INSANE!
Tino: Guys, why don't we should just go, as a favour to Tish?
Carver: Yeah, maybe we should go...
Lor: Monkfish liver pate!
Carver: I'm kissin' the dog!

Tino: I think I had konnichiwa in a sushi bar.

Lor: I'll go get chairs! I think there's some in Mexico!

  • Tino's face disappears right before Carver says "Guys! Tino's broken." in "Cry".
  • "Good thing you don't wanna be cool, rich and popular![1]
  1. The acronym for that is "crap".