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World's Shortest Book: Difference between revisions
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{{trope}}
{{quote|"'George's secrets'. There's the shortest book ever written!"|'''Ape'''
A type of insult, this is a shorthand way of saying what a character is ''not'' capable of. [[Don't Explain the Joke|The implication is that, if a certain person were to write this book, it would have little or no content because they can't do what the title says.]] These are typically cruel to the purported "author", which is why we're limiting this to appearances in works of fiction.
Sometimes the title says it all ("The Amish Phone Directory"), and sometimes the author of the book is the key ("What I Wouldn't Do for Money" by Dennis Rodman). Occasionally inverted where what someone ''doesn't'' know is said to be a ''large'' book.
Contrast [[Wrote the Book]].
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{{examples}}
== Magazines ==▼
* ''[[Mad Magazine]]'' occasionally had a shelf of these, usually politically- or current events-themed. A few examples:▼
** "Etiquette" by [[Lyndon B Johnson]]▼
** "Truths I Have Told" by [[Richard Nixon]]▼
** "[[Self-Deprecation|MAD Magazine's Contributions to American Culture]]"▼
* Nixon was also the subject of a ''[[National Lampoon]]'' one not long after his resignation that claimed that the new book "Friends of Richard Nixon" was one page shorter than "Famous Antarctic Television Personalities of the Eighteenth Century." It went on to note that then-President [[Gerald Ford]] said he had been "reading it all week, finding it challenging in its scope."▼
* ''Dynamite'', a magazine aimed at pre-teens from 1974-92 sold in those "Arrow Books" flyers they gave out in elementary school, did an article like this. "The Joy of Homework" was one title, as was something like "My Greatest Baseball Victories" by Charlie Brown.▼
== Newspaper Comics ==▼
* In one ''[[Pearls Before Swine]]'' strip, Rat writes a book about what men want. There is one single page with the word "[[SEX]]" in all caps.▼
{{quote|'''Rat''': "It would have been shorter, but I included a paragraph about beer."}}▼
* In one ''[[Calvin and Hobbes]]'' strip:▼
{{quote|'''Calvin''': On today's agenda, we'll make a list of what girls are ''good'' for. Obviously this will be a short meeting!}}▼
* Played with in [[Dilbert]]. Dogbert is writing an encyclopedia, but its mostly on him. Although he has a section on Canada which simply says "Canada has trees." ▼
== Film ==
* ''[[George of the Jungle (film)|George of the Jungle]]'' has this, as shown in the page quote.
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'''Baloo:''' "How do you think he will"... What do you mean how do you think he... He's with me, ain't he? And I'll learn him all I know.
'''Bagheera:''' Oh? That shouldn't take long. }}
== Literature ==
* [[Played With]] in [[Real Life]] by the book ''What Men Know About Women''. {{spoiler|It's completely blank.}}
* From ''[[
* An inversion from ''[[Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (novel)|Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix]]'':
{{quote|"I am not aware that it is any of your business what goes on in my house--"
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* Bill Cosby's ''I Am What I Ate...and I'm Frightened!'' has a single page, blank except for the chapter heading, for the chapter entitled "Moderation".
▲=== Magazines ===
▲* ''[[Mad Magazine]]'' occasionally had a shelf of these, usually politically- or current events-themed. A few examples:
▲** "Etiquette" by [[Lyndon B Johnson]]
▲** "Truths I Have Told" by [[Richard Nixon]]
▲** "[[Self-Deprecation|MAD Magazine's Contributions to American Culture]]"
▲* Nixon was also the subject of a ''[[National Lampoon]]'' one not long after his resignation that claimed that the new book "Friends of Richard Nixon" was one page shorter than "Famous Antarctic Television Personalities of the Eighteenth Century." It went on to note that then-President [[Gerald Ford]] said he had been "reading it all week, finding it challenging in its scope."
▲* ''Dynamite'', a magazine aimed at pre-teens from 1974-92 sold in those "Arrow Books" flyers they gave out in elementary school, did an article like this. "The Joy of Homework" was one title, as was something like "My Greatest Baseball Victories" by Charlie Brown.
== Live-Action TV ==
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'''Ethel:''' That won't be a novel, that'll be a short story! }}
▲== Newspaper Comics ==
▲* In one ''[[Pearls Before Swine]]'' strip, Rat writes a book about what men want. There is one single page with the word "[[SEX]]" in all caps.
▲{{quote|'''Rat''': "It would have been shorter, but I included a paragraph about beer."}}
▲* In one ''[[Calvin and Hobbes]]'' strip:
▲{{quote|'''Calvin''': On today's agenda, we'll make a list of what girls are ''good'' for. Obviously this will be a short meeting!}}
▲* Played with in ''[[Dilbert]]''. Dogbert is writing an encyclopedia, but
== Web Comics ==
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* Inverted in ''[[Schlock Mercenary]]'':
{{quote|'''[[The Captain|Tagon]]''': Vog, you're [[Time Abyss|about a zillion years old]]. What you ''don't'' know can probably be written on the back of your hand.}}
* Inverted in ''[[The Order of the Stick]],'' [http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0212.html when Roy makes a couple assumptions about] [[Lovable Rogue|Haley]].
{{quote|'''Roy''': Woah, you?! Helping someone other than yourself? [[OOC Is Serious Business|I don't believe it!]]
'''Haley:''' Excuse me? (Angrily) Since when did you become the ultimate authority on me? If you took everything you don't know about me, and put it all together, it would get a -16 size penalty to AC! }}
{{reflist}}
[[Category:{{PAGENAME}}]]
[[Category:Insult Tropes]]
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