Don't Like, Don't Read/Quotes

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


"If you hate this show and absolutely loathe these begging segments where I ask people to support us, and you're still watching this right now... you need serious help. There are medical professionals who are trained specifically to help people like you. They will get you off that computer, they will get you a life, they will get you some hobbies, maybe even some friends and self-esteem. There's simply no reason you need to continue this miserable, awful existence.
"You see, Nerd, nobody makes you play these games but yourself, so you're your own damn nightmare."
Freddy Kruger, The Angry Video Game Nerd
You have to go out of your way to watch me on TV. I'm easy to avoid. When people say to me, 'You're on TV too much,' I reply, 'Are you saving the batteries on your remote? There are 200 channels - watch something else!' TV reviewers have the worst job in the world because they're the only people who have to watch TV they don't like. In the same way, you'd have to make a pretty big mistake to buy £25 tickets for you and your missus and think, 'I really hate this guy!' That's a major error - it's more than just bumping your head on a door.
If you don't like me... fine! Watch anime.
Tornado Shanks, Sealab 2021
"Well if you don't like the remake of The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, then don't buy it. If you think Skyward sword is going to suck, then don't play it."
But if you're one of those real frightening anal sticklers for Marvel continuity? And you get genuinely angry about people playing fast and loose with Marvel comics canon? Please don't pick it up. You'll have a heart attack, and I don't need that on my conscience, despite the wonders it'd do for my reputation.

"Just a reminder that no matter what the age demographic is for a particular piece of entertainment, if it is something that is entertaining to you, then it is entertaining to you. This seems like a very normal common-sense concept, but for some reason, it's not always understood. Just saying. No particular reason to bring that out there.
[cut to him facepalming]
Oh God... The Internet is so stupid..."

Black Nerd Comedy on Frozen II, in his review of the film.