Innuendo Backfire: Difference between revisions

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[[File:get medieval06802.gif|link=Get Medieval|right]]

Basically, when a given character needing help (a place to stay, whatever) is approached by a prostitute who [[Double Entendre|speaks with perhaps too much metaphor]], and [[Comically Missing the Point|thinks]] her solicitation is an offer for assistance.

Formerly named "Solicitation Mistaken For Help" and "Need a Hand - or A Handjob?"

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== Jokes ==

* There's old joke where a clergyman encounters a prostitute, she says "I'll do anything you can describe in 3 words for $50". He thinks about it for a while, and then says "Paint my house."

** In one of his books, critic Joe Queenan's response to a (hypothetical) request of this nature was "do my taxes."

* An engineering student approaches his friends at lunch one day riding up on a beautiful new bicycle. "Wow," says one of his friends, "where'd you get that bike?" The engineering student says, "Strangest thing. On my way back from class this morning, a gorgeous woman rode up on a bike, got off it, took off all her clothes and threw them on the ground, and told me, 'Take whatever you want!'" His friend nods sagely. "Good choice. Her clothes probably wouldn't have fit."

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* ''[[Discworld]]'':

** Happens to men who approach the [[Band of Brothels|Guild of Seamstresses]] to have their socks darned:

*** In ''[[Discworld/Guards Guards|Guards Guards]]'', a naive Carrot ends up living in a house of "seamstresses" due to this sort of misunderstanding. He mentions that his first night there one of the girls asked if he wanted anything, but they had no apples, so he said no.

*** In ''[[Discworld/Guards! Guards!|Guards Guards]]'', a naive Carrot ends up living in a house of "seamstresses" due to this sort of misunderstanding. He mentions that his first night there one of the girls asked if he wanted anything, but they had no apples, so he said no.

*** Variant: In ''[[Discworld/Feet of Clay|Feet of Clay]]'', one character mentions that she was good at sewing, so she tried to join the Guild of Seamstresses.

*** Similarly, in ''[[Discworld/Night Watch|Night Watch]]'', there is an actual seamstress who is often confused for the other type.

*** In ''[[Discworld/Reaper Man|Reaper Man]]'', Windle Poons, a newly resurrected zombie, is asked by a "seamstress" if he's looking for a good time. He's somewhat addled by the fact that he can see and hear clearly for the first time in decades, and accepts her offer without thinking about it. She runs away when she gets a good look at him, though.

** In ''[[Discworld/Interesting Times|Interesting Times]]'', Rincewind is approached by several beautiful, scantily-clad women who explicitly say that all of their men have died out and they need his help repopulating their island. However, due to years of living alone on a desert island, Rincewind's mind has deteriorated somewhat and he thinks they're offering to make him some mashed potatoes.