List of Transgressions: Difference between revisions

A character is subjected to a [[Long List]] of his sins and transgressions, often impossibly long. Alternatively, a character is placed in purgatory or otherwise judged for his crimes, with a convenient long list of crimes at hand, possibly because the [[Powers That Be]] have [[Surveillance as the Plot Demands]].

 

 

{{examples}}

* In one ''[[Black Jack]]'' story, Black Jack's school friend, Makube, is a criminal. He gets detained by the ICPO.

{{quote|Inspector: So you won't confess your crimes of murder, smuggling, drug-dealing, gambling fraud, forgery, battery, bribery, human trafficking, pimping, and [[Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking|public urination?]]

Makube: [[I Resemble That Remark|I'll cop to public urination]]. }}

 

{{quote|'''Judge Thorkwung:''' Ernest Errol Quinch and Waldo Dobbs, also known as "D.R." or "Diminished Responsibility", you are charged with arson, kidnapping, theft, grievous wounding, possession of unlawful atomic weapons, taking and driving away, conspiracy to overthrow the government, [[What Do You Mean It's Not Heinous?|coveting thy neighbour's ox]], graverobbing, torture, criminal libel, blackmail, polluting the environment, shoplifting, 714 separate driving offenses, forging sacred relics, transmuting base metal into gold, [[Bread, Eggs, Milk, Squick|genocide]], [[Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking|spitting]], and thirty-two offenses [[Take Our Word for It|so unusual and horrible]] they do not have names.}}

* In ''[[Strangers in Paradise]]'', when Katchoo is arrested for her revenge on Freddie, her list of crimes reads as follows (creator Terry Moore [[Word of God|got the specifics]] from a lawyer who'd read the previous issue):

'''Freddie:''' ...Castrate me! The crazy bitch tried to castrate me!

'''Katchoo:''' Imagine my surprise when I found I didn't have to! }}

{{quote|Wanted for crimes against the Galaxy including: Genocide ... Fratricide ... Patricide ... Matricide ... Impersonating a member of the Intergalactic Church of Truth ... Impersonating a member of the Green Lantern Corps ... Carrying a concealed thermo-nuclear device ... Breaking into the Justice League Satellite ... Fishing without a license ... [[Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking|Jaywalking]] ... Grand theft plasma rocket ... Disturbance of the peace across three space sectors ... 1,978,643,896 unpaid parking permits ... Illegal bounty hunting ... Wanton destruction of government property ... Demolishing a city without a permit ... Reckless endangerment toward animals ... Hijacking ... Selling/distributing radioactive material to [[Deathbringer the Adorable|cute fluffy]] [[Killer Rabbit|bunny rabbits]] ... Noise infractions level 5.0 ... Illegally poaching Starros ... Bounty Huntering in a restricted zone ... Stepping on the grass ... [[Too Much Information| Defecating in a public garden]] ... Loitering ... Advocating the overthrow of the heads of state ... Not honoring the bounty hunter code}}

* In ''[[Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Adventures]]'' #23, a space criminal named Bellybomb is sentenced to a toxic prison planet for seventeen life sentences for extortion, armed robbery, hijacking, kidnapping, torture, murder, man-eating, brain poaching, soul thievery...and impersonating a primitive deity named Bob. After the jailers read off these crimes, Bellybomb points out that they didn't mention his unpaid parking tickets.

{{quote|By the authority of the League of Nations, Baron Heinrich von Helsingard is hereby placed under arrest as an enemy of all mankind for the crimes of kidnapping, human experimentation upon unwilling subjects, and... ''[flips through the list]'' ''Wow. Jeez,'' that's a lot of atrocities. Where did Helsingard find the time to sleep? ''[more flipping]'' I don't even know what this one ''means''.}}

 

* ''[[A Scanner Darkly]]'', from which the image/quote is taken:

{{quote|'''Narrator:''' The next thing he knew, a creature from between dimensions was standing at his bed, looking down at him disapprovingly.

{{quote|"impersonating an officer of the Crown... impersonating a [[Crowning Moment of Funny|Cleric]] of the Church of England..." (Jack smiles after the last one)}}

** Note that the man reading them stated at the beginning that only "the most egregious" of his crimes were to be stated. The list still goes on for a ''very'' long time.

* ''[[Heavy Metal (animation)|Heavy Metal]]''. The charges against Captain Sternn:

{{quote|'''Prosecutor:''' Lincoln Stern, you stand here accused of 12 counts of murder in the first degree, 14 counts of armed theft of Federation property, 22 counts of piracy in high space, 18 counts of fraud, 37 counts of rape...[[Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking|and one moving violation]]. How do you plead?}}

** Coincidentally enough, the viewer soon learns that Sternn also ran a "preschoolers prostitute ring" and "sold dope disguised as a nun".

{{quote|Bigamy,

Passing as the Prince of Wales,

Revealing the facts of life to an Indian. }}

* Subverted in ''[[The Pope Must Die]]'' when the dying Cardinal Rocco asks for absolution for his sins. When asked what they are he replies that since he doesn't have a lot of time, if you can think of it, he's done it.

 

* The [[Neil Gaiman]] short story "Other People" from ''Fragile Things'' is centered on the premise of hell being basically this, only instead of simply being read the list, every single sin is brought forth and purged from the individual via [[Cold-Blooded Torture]].

* Dante's ''[[Divine Comedy|Inferno]]'' keeps track of transgressions, with Hell being divided into subsections for specific crimes.

* Two from ''[[Discworld]]'':

{{quote|'''Vimes''': Conspiracy to cause an affray, going equipped to commit a crime, threatening behaviour, loitering with intent, [[Incredibly Lame Pun|loitering within tent]], hah, travelling for the purpose of committing a crime, malicious lingering and carrying concealed weapons.

'''Carrot:''' I don't think that one --

'''Vimes:''' ''I'' can't see 'em. }}

{{quote|'''Lawyer''': — including more than two thousand cases of Making an Affray, Causing a Public Nuisance, Being Found Drunk, Being Found Very Drunk, Using Offensive Language (taking into account 97 instances of Using Language That Was Probably Offensive If Anyone Could Understand It), Committing a Breach of the Peace, Malicious Lingering, Grand Theft, Petty Theft, Burglary, Housebreaking, Loitering With Intent to Commit a Felony —}}

 

* Happens in ''[[Arrested Development (TV series)|Arrested Development]]'' in a preliminary to the court case. It makes George Sr. aware, for the first time, just how deep in trouble he is.

* The health inspector reading the list of violations at ''[[Fawlty Towers]]''. About halfway through Basil says "Yes... say no more..." but the inspector just ploughs right on until he reaches "... and two dead pigeons in the water tank."

{{quote|'''Mac:''' You're under arrest for the murder of Derek James [and] Lauren Salinas, kidnapping and attempted murder of a crime scene investigator, armed robbery, grand theft auto, assault and battery. But most of all, for pissing me off.}}

{{quote|'''Briscoe:''' I'm trying to decide what to arrest you for - obstruction of justice, harboring a fugitive or just being a general pain in the ass!}}

* In ''[[The Brittas Empire]]'', Gordon Brittas has quite [[Unsympathetic Comedy Protagonist|a long list]] when he turns up in heaven including [[Comedic Sociopathy|115 separate acts of manslaughter]], [[Driven to Suicide|cause of 4 suicides]], and [[Break the Cutie|23 people driven clinically insane]]. They'd been counting up a while before he arrived too, {{spoiler|don't worry, even Heaven recognises the [[Death Equals Redemption]] trope}}.

* This is how every episode of ''[[The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret]]'' begins, with a British judge reading legal charges against the titular character, leading into a [[How We Got Here]] plot.

 

 

* The Dwarves of ''[[Warhammer Fantasy Battle]]'' have a Book of Grudges.

* A priest/lawyer addressing the famous Rogue-Mage Raz in a trial:

* This is what Lord Soth had to put up with during his time as [[The Undead]] on [[Dragonlance|Krynn]]: a List of Transgressions provided by ghosts. When he went to [[Ravenloft]], his punishment was to listen to them repeated improperly, which is apparently worse.

 

* Guybrush in ''[[Monkey Island 2: LeChuck's Revenge]]'' has one of these in a [[Wanted Poster]], which keeps growing in size as the game progresses.

 

* ''[[The Adventures of Dr. McNinja]]'' has this in purgatory, except the list is a menu. The dead must ''eat'' all their sins before they can move on to their final rest. It takes a very long time, because there's only [[The Grim Reaper|one waiter]].

* ''[[Darths and Droids]]'' in [http://darthsanddroids.net/episodes/0329.html this strip]:

{{quote|'''Obi-Wan:''' Let's see... You stole the plans for a symbol of peace. You're allied with (a) a known megalomaniacal warlord and (b) a criminal sociopath. You have not one, but two, armies at your disposal. You've captured me — unfairly — and are holding me with no means of escape. And you're [[Monologuing]].}}

{{quote|You read the books / With sticky feathers, / Left books out / In stormy weathers! / Ordered books of lower caliber, / You truly are a sallow shallow bird! / We found your underlines in [[John Milton|Milton]], / We found you loaned / The books to children!}}

* ''[[The Inexplicable Adventures of Bob]]:'' At the trial of Fructose Riboflavin--

{{quote|"...And so, thou art called before this court on charges of high treason, murder, assault, theft, tax evasion, destruction of public property, destruction of private property, fraud, persiflage, littering, graphic blandishment, jaywalking, kaywalking, spitting..."}}

 

* The ''[[Protectors of the Plot Continuum]]'' are required to read the list of charges to the various [[Mary Sue]]s they terminate.

** [[PPC]]ers often start out the chargelist with things like grammar and spelling errors, move on to bigger charges like "disrupting the fabric of reality", and end with things like "having a stupid name", "pissing off PPC agents", etc.

* In ''[[Open Blue]]'', the [[The Federation|Axifloan Coalition]] lists various crimes that various Pirate Lords and ladies are wanted for. While some have pretty serious lists throughout, others... [[Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking|not so much]]. Pirate Lady Lucille Prideux's (from v4) list ends with "Theft in general" while Captain Van Wijk's ends with "Blasphemy" (which is pretty light compared to his other crimes). The real cake takers, however, are Captain Garth (v4), with "Unlicensed operation of a menagerie", and Captain Ingrid (v4), with "Insulting Admiral Flota Vladimir Ilyavich Tokarev, '''HERO OF THE TRIBES'''".

* Before killing his victim, the Confessor from the ''[[Global Guardians PBEM Universe]]'' recites a list of his victim's sins. He plucks this information from their own minds telepathically.

 

* In an episode of the ''[[Woody Woodpecker|New Woody Woodpecker Show]]'', Woody finds out his nemesis Buzz Buzzard's long list of offenses to the law, which includes "unlawful toenail clipping". But there's more: Upon seeing this, Woody immediately calls the police on the phone and starts listing Buzz's offenses, to which the cop pays no mind whatsoever. Only when he mentions: "But Officer, he parked in a [[Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking|no-parking zone]]!" do the cops decide to flock in on Buzz and arrest him (he was trying to escape in Woody's stalled car).

* The election episode of ''[[Jimmy Neutron]]'' [[Double Subversion|doubly subverts]] it. Ms. Fowl lists off the candidates' transgressions as "Bribery, blackmail, and murder", then corrects herself that the last wasn't actually murder, but operating a zeppelin on school property without a permit.

'''St. Peter:''' I know everything... buttmunch. }}

* In the ''[[Pac-Man]]'' cartoon "Nighty Nightmares", Clyde dreams that he is on trial. Pac-Man, as the judge, reads the charges: "Chomping without a license. Chomping ''with'' a license. Chomping, chomping, chomping!"

{{quote|'''Homer:''': "I only did that the one time!"}}

 

* When King Charles I was executed, the list of crimes was boringly detailed: "he, ... hath traitorously and maliciously levied war against the present Parliament, and the people therein represented, particularly upon or about the 30th day of June..."

** At his trial, Charles I was found guilty of treason, murder, rapine, burning, spoils, desolation, damage... and mischief. This last one is not really an example of [[Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking]] since the common law definition of 'mischief' involves destruction of property. Such definitions lead to the theoretical common law crime of "Malicious mischief and mayhem".

* The Cluny abbey foundation charter of 910 threatens anyone who messes with the place with having their name taken out of the Book of Life, getting limbs chewed off by vermin, experiencing the torments of hell while still alive (as a torture-buddy of Judas), etc. Also they've got to pay a hundred pounds of gold.

* Some religions (Islam being one) believe that two angels/spirits/what-have-you record all a person's good and bad deeds throughout their lives. When someone dies, the lists get read off to whatever deity does the judging.

{{quote|But this letter is long, Mr. President, and it is time to conclude.

I accuse Major Du Paty de Clam as the diabolic workman of the miscarriage of justice, without knowing, I have wanted to believe it, and of then defending his harmful work, for three years, by the guiltiest and most absurd of machinations.

 

{{reflist}}

[[Category:Narrative Devices]]

[[Category:Comedy Tropes]]