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I wanted to be a lumberjack. LEAPING FROM TREE TO TREE AS THEY FLOAT DOWN OF THE MIGHTY RIVERS OF BRITISH COLUMBIA! THE GIANT REDWOOD! THE LURCH! THE FIR! THE MIGHTY SCOTSPINE! THE SMELL OF FRESH CUT TIMBER! THE CRASH OF MIGHTY TREES! I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK. I sleep all night, I work all day! —Monty Python's Flying Circus, the Lumberjack Sketch. You don't wanna know the rest.