My Little Panzer: Difference between revisions

* [[Confessions of Georgia Nicolson|Georgia Nicolson]] worries about her little sister's "Pantalitzer" doll, described as having a terrifying face, steel forks for hands, and easily detachable parts that hurt when thrown at Georgia.

 

* In the 70's, ''[[Saturday Night Live]]'' had toy maker Irwin Mainway (played Dan Aykroyd) appear on a consumer watchdog show called "Consumer Probe", and hopelessly defend his company's extremely dodgy and dangerous products, and drawing comparisons with the dangers of actual commonplace products. Of note was an episode where he attempted to defend a series of Halloween costumes, including "Johnny Space Commander Mask" (simply a plastic bag and a rubber band), "The Invisible Pedestrian" ("NOT FOR BLIND KIDS!"), "Johnny Combat" (which comes with an actual working rifle, ammo not included. Allegedly popular in Detroit), and "Johnny Human Torch" (oil-soaked rags and an oversized torch. "It lights up the night!")

** Then you got "Bag O' Glass", along with its spin-offs Bag O' Nails, Bag O' Bugs, Bag O' Vipers, and last but not least, Bag O' Sulfuric Acid.

** One of those pathetic attempts to defend his products involved a harmless toy phone; Mainway argued kids could choke themselves with the long stretchy cord. These days, what with the CPSC wiping out long cords of all sorts on kids' toys, the dangerous phone is a [[Funny Aneurysm Moment|funny aneurysm]] (much like most things on ''SNL'').

** Lots of the ''SNL'''s fake toy commercials are for toys that would no way in Hell be sold in real life (whether it's because they're physically dangerous, will cause complaints from [[Moral Guardians]] who think that kids are impressionable enough to be screwed up by what they play with, or are just plain useless and/or lame). Some examples include: Gangsta Bitch Barbie (comes with Jolly Ranchers, a pack of Newport cigarettes, and a restraining order against her boyfriend Tupac Ken), Nerf Crotch Bats, Big Red (A viking who sprays massive gushers of blood-red liquid), Litter Critters (using cat crap to make clay figurines), and the recent dangerous toy commercial, Li'l Poundcake (a doll that administers vaccinations against the HP virus for girls under 10).

* ''Merrick And Rosso'' had a sketch involving two modified remote controlled toys from hell; One being a [[Thomas the Tank Engine]] with a buzzsaw on the front, the other being a Barbie-style van with a [[Kill It with Fire|flamethrower]], both tearing up mundane toys. (Except the official Merrick and Rosso [[Non-Action Guy|inaction]] figures)

'''Maxwell Smart, Agent 86''': No 99, the real credit belongs to these toys. After all, we had at our disposal every fiendish and destructive plaything ever devised for the pleasure of little children. Those poor devils, all they had were real guns and bullets. }}

* In [[Loriot]]'s classic sketch ''Weihnachten bei Hoppenstedts'' (''Christmas at Hoppenstedts'''), Father Hoppenstedt buys for his son a model nuclear power plant. It makes "[[Stuff Blowing Up|poof!]]" if you did a mistake while assembling it.

* On ''[[Stargate SG-1]]'' the [[Horde of Alien Locusts|replicators]] were created by the android Reese, to keep her company and entertain her. Over time the human population of that world grew distrustful of her, so she gave the replicators the [[Gone Horribly Right|ability to defend themselves]], [[Grey Goo|to the great detriment of the other inhabitants of the planet,]] [[Apocalypse How|and many others as well.]]