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{{tropelist}}
* [[Bathroom Stall Graffiti]]: "For a good time, call 606-4311. Ask for Ken."
* [[Black Comedy]]
* [[Blessed Are the Cheesemakers]]: The line "Take heart amid the deepening gloom that your dog is finally getting enough cheese", which pokes fun at a contemporary commercial for Gaines-Burgers dog food which asked, "Is your dog getting enough cheese in his diet?"
* [[Catch Phrase]]: Several catch phrases of the late 1960s-early 1970s are incorporated into or referenced by the piece:
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** "Do not fold, spindle or mutilate", a common warning printed on computer punched cards (a ''very'' pre-[[Magnetic Disk]] storage medium for computer data) during the 1960s, and frequently quoted as an ironic commentary on what was perceived as a growing "dehumanization" of society at the time.
** "Take heart amid the deepening gloom that your dog is finally getting enough cheese" references a contemporary commercial for Gaines-Burgers dog food. (See ''Blessed Are the Cheesemakers'', above.)
* [[Crapsack World]]: Pretty much what the piece assumes that [[Real Life]] is, when it's not indulging in outright [[Absurdism]].
* [[Escape From the Crazy Place]]: Averted ''and'' subverted in the very first lines: "Go placidly amid the noise and waste, and remember what comfort there may be in owning a piece thereof."
* [[For Inconvenience Press One]]: "Wherever possible, put people on hold."
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