Zoofights/Characters: Difference between revisions

== Zoofights I ==

 

 

=== Ten Gibbons With Clubs For Arms / Four Gibbons With Spring Legs And Egg Whisks For Arms / Devil Gibbon ===

 

 

=== Six Lions On Roller Skates With Cannons For Asses/Two Flying Lions With Cyborg Torsos/Lion Head On A Motorbike ===

* [[Zerg Rush]]

=== Firenoceros ===

 

=== Three Flying Tiger Sharks ===

 

 

=== Team Cheetah / The Steed of The Savannah ===

=== Three Firebreathing Frogs The Size And Shape of Sylvester Stallone / Cancerman ===

 

{{quote| '''Major Failure''': He can leap tall buildings in a single bound, but his bones break upon landing. He can shoot webs, but they're usually speckled with his own blood. Poor bastard.}}

* [[The Woobie]]: They're portrayed as hilariously pitiable, especially when the last surviving frog gets cancer. Winds up getting invoked in-universe when even the normally heartless Zoofights Inc takes pity on him and allows him to quit a hopeless fight with Swanmass instead of leaving him to die.

 

Is it possible to have too much of a good thing? The Shark Brothers are four clones of the late Owen Hart, with the head and arms replaced with shark heads. A fourth shark head is planted in the chest, for a total of sixteen shark heads.

 

 

=== Hive Lions ===

=== Snakes On A Brain ===

One of the most ludicrous monsters ever to enter Zoofights, this monstrosity is a sperm whale brain in an armored dome, upon which sits a laser turret. Surrounding the dome, like tentacles, are the front halves of twelve anacondas.

* [[Punny Name]]

 

 

* [[Attack! Attack! Attack!]]

* [[The Juggernaut]]

* {{spoiler|[[Vodka Drunkenski]]: His upgrades for the losers league were surgically implanted Vodka tanks, allowing him to drink up whenever hhe felt like it.}}

* [[Eyepatch of Power]]

* {{spoiler|[[Heroic Sacrifice]]: Against From Hell.}}

* [[High Altitude Battle]]: {{spoiler|In the semifinal against Steamcrab.}}

* [[Power Armor]]

* [[Army of Thieves and Whores]]

* [[Enemy Mine]]: With {{spoiler|Bastard Shark.}}

* [[Lethal Joke Character]]: Stockbridge and Barrington, the two drunks.

* [[Unstoppable Rage]]: The badger is apparently in a state of constant rage, though he has been conditioned to 'only' maul his handlers.

* [[And I Must Scream]]: He's been deprived of plankton and almost driven mad by pain and rage. Almost every thought from him is a desperate desire to have some plankton.

* [[Enemy Mine]]: With {{spoiler|Stockbridge and Barrington.}}

* [[Good Old Fisticuffs]]: Was given a pair of muscly arms in a later incarnation.

 

 

* [[The Berserker]]: In his second fight.

* [[Bottled Heroic Resolve]]

* [[Heroic Second Wind]]

* [[Horny Vikings]]

* {{spoiler|[[Boom! Headshot!]]: The chimp manages to take Pandamander down this way.}}

* [[Guns Akimbo]]

* [[Feel No Pain]]

* {{spoiler|[[Fusion Dance]]: With Hellpotamus after both combatants kill each other.}}

 

* {{spoiler|[[Boom! Headshot!]]: Similarly to above, the chimp is killed by a bullet to the brain.}}

* {{spoiler|[[Fusion Dance]]}}

* [[The Gunslinger]]: The chimp.

A vicious hammerhead shark with a buzzsaw for a tail, walking the earth on a set of spindly metal legs. Dakuvanga is a reminder that we are very lucky sharks are not able to live on land.

 

 

=== Riot Yeti / 'Nam Yeti / The Shaolin Monkey ===

[[Last of His Kind|The last yeti]], hopped up on speed and wielding an electrically-charged spear and riot shield. What could possibly go wrong?

 

* [[Drugs Are Bad]]: A very rare example of Zoofights playing this trope straight – Riot Yeti’s history of drug use gave him a bit of brain damage, and in his fight against Dakuvanga, his poor decision-making costs him the match.

{{quote| '''Major Failure''': Oh Riot Yeti you stupid motherfucker. }}

* [[Shell Shocked Senior]] / [[Zen Survivor]]

 

Equipped with flight and massively powerful jaws as well as a rotating array of backup weapons that includes broken bottles, guns, lightsabers, a force field and stinging tentacles, the Australian entrant Ned Killy holds the extra-special distinction of being the first ever competitor to outright win a tournament.

 

* [[Laser Blade]]: As Chompa.

* [[Lightning Bruiser]]

* [[Eldritch Abomination]]: After returning from deep space, Inquisipede slowly evolves into one-- Elohim.

* [[Knight Templar]] (ironic, considering what the Inquisition did to the Templars)

 

=== Glaciosaur / Ankylodyte / The Penguin ===

 

* [[Big Bad]]: One of the two [[Big Bad|Big Bads]] in Season 4, the other being Elohim.

* [[Hive Mind]]

* [[Mother of a Thousand Young]]

In Zoofights 4 these six-foot robotic insects served as handy servants to deal with any problems that required going out into the air-less void of space, like hull repair.

 

* [[Redshirt Army]]

* [[Running Gag]]: [[Look Around You|Bless you, Mecha-Ants. Blechants.]]

After some controversy (both in and out of universe) about having human entrants in Zoofights after Zoofights 3’s Two Drunk Guys and Father Leo McGarry, Major Failure instituted a “no humans” rule. That didn’t stop the Zoofights 5 British team from entering Smash Gordon, [[Loophole Abuse|who is a Neanderthal caveman and thus is not quite human]].

 

* [[Cyborg]]

* [[Take a Third Option]]: Gordon was so stupid that people voted for his ''dog''. {{spoiler|Gordon lost, the dog escaped... until next time.}}

* [[Power Armor]]

* [[Russian Guy Suffers Most]]: The Sturgeon General’s final incarnation as Chernoble (and the following battle) is practically a [[Tear Jerker]].

* [[The Stoic]]

 

The Indian entrant. Patel Industries's finest ship destroyer, Croctopus spent his life before Zoofights breaking down decomissioned boats into scrap metal. “A top quality crocodile with the arms of a top quality octopus”, Croctopus is completely insane (due to his past, he thinks his purpose in life is to build boats) and in possession of many, many power tools. Not a good combination.

 

* [[Big Damn Heroes|Big Damn Hero]]

* [[Bunny Ears Lawyer]]

* [[Awesome but Impractical]]: The Pride is Prejudice's bullets. Specifically ''their heads''.

* [[BFG]]: Prejudice is the size of a locomotive.

* [[Named Weapons]]: Prejudice.

* [[Shout-Out]]: To [[Jane Austen]].

* [[Call Back]]: To Zoofights 1.

* [[Crack Defeat]]: Sting Kong has the absolute worst luck with random number generators. He was the overwhelming favorite in Round 1, but lost. In the Loser’s League he was even more heavily favored against Ro-Boto Cop, but wound up taking a third option and befriending him.

* [[Mix and Match Critter]]: Gorilla body, wasp head, ''scorpion stinger arms''.

* [[Take a Third Option]]: Friendship with Ro-Boto Cop.

 

The first ever Zoofighter from North Korea! Great Leap Forward was originally created to assist the peasant folk with day-to-day challenges like farming, but he can fight when he has to.

 

* [[Cyborg]]

* [[Weaponized Animal]]: Especially severe case here. Goes [[Up to Eleven]] with The Long March, at which point the poor thing is practically [[Organic Technology]].

* [[Drinking Contest]]: With O'Batahan.

* [[Eagle Land]]

* {{spoiler|[[Make My Monster Grow]]}}

* [[Memetic Mutation]]: Readers latched onto the shutter shades he wears and ran with it. He eventually started spouting memes in-universe as well. [[Kanye West|Now Prez, imma let you finish...]]

A female praying mantis (female mantids are always bigger and stronger!) boasting nails on her claws, a gun that shoots black widow spiders attached to her rear, and stealth camouflage as well as the power of flight and high intelligence. The tradeoff? Her exoskeleton can handle only minor attacks, rendering her one of the frailest monsters in Zoofights.

 

* [[Dangerously Genre Savvy]]: She’s studied up on Zoofights history and past matches, and she knows what works and what doesn’t.

** This makes it incredibly ironic in Zoofights 6, when her creator used her as his RP character and proceeded to have her lose ''every match she bet on.''

 

=== As a whole: ===

* [[The Eighties]]

* [[Product Placement]] (mostly)

* [[Darker and Edgier]]: Literally.

* {{spoiler|[[Emotion Eater]]: In the second round his laser is reconditioned to draw power from the terror his nightmare device induces.}}

* [[Frickin' Laser Beams]]

* [[Heart Is an Awesome Power]]: Especially when combined with a tummy-mounted [[Wave Motion Gun]].

* [[Shout-Out]]: To the [[Care Bears]], [[Teddy Ruxpin]], and maybe [[Toy Story|Lotso Huggin' Bear]].

* [[Wolverine Claws]]

 

* [[Japanese Ranguage]]

* [[Shout-Out]]: To ''[[Neuromancer]]''; also wields a [[Deadly Disc|Deadly]] [[Tron|Identity Disk]].

* [[Tron Lines]]: As Neuromantis.

* {{spoiler|[[Worthy Opponent]]: to Muhammut Kali.}}

* {{spoiler|[[Take Over the World]]}}, maybe:

{{quote| {{spoiler|Ironichide via The Major: "He had killed the rest of the Kray team out of 'what looked like spiteful thrills' and begun a cult of other animals who guarded his new home at the head of the river on the starboard face of the volcano. His only focus was now reading ''Heart of Darkness'' by Joseph Conrad. Still laughing."}}}}

* {{spoiler|[[Ungrateful Bastard]]: Monster Truck offered Hardcore Prawn a paw when he was dangling over a pit of lava. He paid him back by throwing him into said pit.}}

 

** Turns out it to have been a non-issue. {{spoiler|There was no friction whatsoever.}}

* [[Pint-Sized Powerhouse|Pint Sized Powerhouses]]

** {{spoiler|"In the [[Shadow of the Colossus]], Hammerz hangs his head."}}

** {{spoiler|[[Double Dragon]]}}

* [[Cannibal]]: There WOULD be six of them, but two didn't make it.

* {{spoiler|Crack Defeat: Angsteater was eaten by Biguana, who was promptly kicked to death (but not promptly enough to save Angsteater).}}

* {{spoiler|[[Make My Monster Grow]]}}

* {{spoiler|[[Mix and Match Critter]]: It "absorbed" Sawz and eight humans when it was reborn.}}

* {{spoiler|[[Curb Stomp Battle]] (see below): PEP-Simian was ''creamed'' during the voting period, half because Hare Metal had dark magical powers and half because everyone wanted to him fight Croaka-Cola in the Losers League.}}

** {{spoiler|In the fight with New Croak he was melted, ground up, and ''drunk by Croak''. Such is the fate of those hit with the random factor tractor.}}

* [[Foil]] (probably): To Croaka-Cola, who's a stoic in a space suit while PEP-Simian is an axe-crazy on a skateboard.

* {{spoiler|[[Joke Character]]: A Jar Of Frog Piss.}}

 

 

* [[Hair-Raising Hare]]

* {{spoiler|[[Infernal Retaliation]]: Prying open Hare Metal's ribcage to get at his burning organs is a very bad idea. Just ask Pepsimian.}}

* [[Hermetic Magic]] / [[Instant Runes]]: Hare Metal was created by music exec mages and his blueprints are written in runes.

* [[Hurricane of Puns]]: The fight commentary had a music reference (with a You Tube link!) every other sentence.

* [[Always Male]]: Aversion

* {{spoiler|Crack Defeat: to Final Mantasy, who double-KO'd Nightmare and Mental Ben by encasing them in water.}}

* [[Nepotism]]: Major Failure's wife designed Teslacorn, which led to charges of favoritism on the ZF forums.

* [[Shock and Awe]]

** If she wasn't at first, she is now.

{{quote| [[The Sociopath|Friendship Is A Redundant Concept Only Held By The Weak.]]}}

=== Major Failure ===

 

 

* [[Blatant Lies]]: Every tournament Major Failure assures the audience that nothing will go wrong this year. And every year he's wrong. He was especially insistant about it in Zoofights IV, a year when ''three'' competitors became [[Eldritch Abominations]].

These two are the main driving force behind the Loser's League from Zoofights 3 onward. Neither roleplays often, but both are involved in everyday contest proceedings and could be seen as the next step down from Gravitas Shortfall.

 

* [[Those Two Guys]]

* {{spoiler|[[Unexplained Recovery]]: Akumu was killed off alongside Gezora during the Zoofights 5 Loser's League Royal Rumble, but he returned alongside Gezora after the semifinals.}}

* [[Alien Lunch]] / [[I Ate What?]] / [[I Drank What]]: Gezora is usually up front with what is in the food and drinks which includes glowing chemicals and other bar patrons.

* [[Ambiguous Gender]] / [[No Biological Sex]]: Gezora refers to itself as "it".

* {{spoiler|[[Back From the Dead]] /UnexplainedRecovery: Gezora died and then got better in ZFV.}}

* [[Cool Shades]]: Gezora has been sporting shutter-shades since supporting The Snapture ([[Added Alliterative Appeal|super!]]).

* [[Cordon Bleugh Chef]] / [[I Am a Humanitarian]]: Gezora has ''adventurous'' tastes.

* [[Gargle Blaster]]: Gezora's signature drink is the Pineal Colada, among many others. Gezora got its start when Gezora/someone started posting provocatively-named real drink mixes.

* [[No Indoor Voice]]: GEZORA DOES NOT UNDERSTAND WHISPERING.

* [[Third Person Person]]: Gezora speaks in the third person.

* [[Conspiracy Theorist]]

* [[Cool Shades]]

* [[The Men in Black]]: In Zoofights 6:

{{quote| "I am Agent Johnson, a representative of, let us say, a covert branch of the United States Fish and Wildlife service, here with the full cooperation of the British government."}}

* [[Voluntary Shapeshifting]]

 

A Nazi with an accordion for a head, or maybe a Nazi accordion. {{spoiler|One of the few audience members to directly influence a tournament match, Doktor Hans' timely use of his Gorillion Dollars (a bonus vote worth 15 normal votes) was essential for The Seal of Disapproval to defeat The Snapture.}}

 

* [[The Gambling Addict]]

* [[Those Wacky Nazis]]

* [[Evil Knockoff]]: Metal Lesko.

* [[Ineffectual Sympathetic Villain]]: Robotnik, who is fully in-character as he throws a fit every time he loses a Chao Emerald in a bet. His journal entries leading up to the fight with Lesko paint an incredibly heroic and sympathetic picture.

* [[Super-Powered Evil Side]]: Lesko turns nasty when he gets all the emeralds.

* {{spoiler|[[Villainous Rescue]]: Robotnik defeats Lesko, blowing up his own Death Egg in the process and saving the world from a salesman with the powers of a god.}}