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Bored of the Rings: Difference between revisions
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{{quote| ''[[German Engineering|Grundig]] [[wikipedia:Blaupunkt|blaupunkt]] [[BFG|luger]] [[Dance Sensation|frug / Watusi]] snarf [[Black Speech|wazoo!]]''<br />
''[[Richard Nixon|Nixon]] [[wikipedia:Dirksen Senate Office Building|dirksen]] [[Yes but What Does Zataproximetacine DO|nasahist]] / [[wikipedia:Charles Rebozo|Rebozo]] [[Oddly-Named Sequel 2: Electric Boogaloo|boogaloo]].'' }}
{{quote|''"'''This ring, no other, is made by the Elves'''<br />
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''If found, send to Sorhed. (The postage is prepaid.)"''|Inscription on The One Ring}}
An, and possibly ''the'', outrageous parody of [[
Produced during the first wave of Tolkien's popularity, when ''LOTR'' fandom was a [[New Age Retro Hippie|hallmark of the counterculture]], ''Bored'' draws a deliberate parallel to the contrast between ''LOTR'''s epic, almost academic, style and the bohemians and hippies who typified its fans at the time. In part ''BOTR'' accomplishes this by slavishly mimicking the ''form'' of the book, both in content and in physical layout -- the [[media:BotR_650.jpg|original]] paperback edition [http://lotrscrapbook.bookloaf.net/gallery/bookcovers/pages/04.htm copied the design] of the first authorized Tolkien paperbacks published in the United States, right down to the back-cover note warning of the unauthorized editions which had been previously published. However, draped over this superficially Tolkienian framework is an over-the-top and frequently hallucinogenic tale that twists every element of ''The Lord of the Rings'' into something ridiculous yet still recognizable.
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* [[The Cavalry]]: Subverted by the Riders of Roi-Tan, who ride bad-tempered sheep.
* [[Cloudcuckoolander]]: Tim Benzedrine
* [[Contemptible Cover]]: The original paperback edition parodied the infamous "Hippie Edition" of ''[[
* [[Cosmopolitan Council]]: Pretty much averted, if not subverted, by Orlon's council at Riv'n'dell.
* [[Creepy Long Fingers]]: Hobbits.
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* [[Doorstopper]] Averted; for a book that manages to parody the whole of ''LOTR'', it's surprisingly slim.
* [[The Eeyore]]: Goddam
* [[Elegant Weapon for
{{quote| In his hand he carried an ancient and trustworthy weapon, called by the elves a Browning semi-automatic.}}
* [[Elves vs. Dwarves]]: And how.
* [[The End of the World
* [[Evil Tower of Ominousness]]: The Eisentower, Chikken Noodul...
* [[Fantastic Racism]]: Starts where Tolkien left off and runs with it -- everybody seems to hate everybody else in Lower Middle Earth.
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* [[Hobbits]]: Viciously satirized by the lazy, slovenly and generally disgusting Boggies.
* [[Hollywood Tactics]]: Subtly lampshaded when Arrowroot stupidly suggests marching on Sorhed's overwhelmingly larger army after the siege of Twodor is over. Goodgulf can't believe anyone could be so cataclysmically stupid and tries to throttle him.
* [[Hoist
* [[Hooked Up Afterwards]]:
{{quote| Of the ballhog and Schlob, little was heard either, but local gossips reported that wedding bells were only centuries away.}}
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* [[Lady of War]]: Eorache
* [[Left Justified Fantasy Map]]: Parodied.
* [[Line in
{{quote| '''Arrowroot''': "Peoples of the West! The battle before the Black Gate of Sorhed will be one of few against many; but the few are of pure heart and the many are of the filthy. Nevertheless, those of you who wish to cringe and run from the fight may do so to quicken our pace. Those who still ride with the King of Twodor will live forever in song and legend! The rest may go."<br />
It is said that the dustcloud did not settle for many days after. }}
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* [[Population X and Counting]]: The village of Whee has a welcoming sign announcing its population as "96 and still growing!" with 1004 and 328 each crossed out before it.
* [[Pungeon Master]]: Birdseye; more generally, the authors.
* [[Put
* [[Red Eyes, Take Warning]]: The Black Riders have "perfectly normal red glowing fires" where their eyes should be.
* [[Refuge in Audacity]]: One of the first parodies you read in the book is changing the name of Bilbo Baggins to ''Dildo Bugger!''
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* [[Simultaneous Arcs]]
* [[Sophisticated As Hell]]: Numerous examples, most notably the overarching contrast between mimicking Tolkien's ''form'' while writing deliberately outrageous material.
* [[Spanner in
* [[Speak Friend and Enter]]: Parodies the [[Trope Namer]] by having Goodgulf only consider using the doorknob on the gates to Doria after hours of futile guessing and spellcraft.
* [[Spiritual Successor]]: ''[[wikipedia:National Lampoon's Doon|National Lampoon's Doon]]'' -- a parody of Frank Herbert's ''[[Dune]]''.
* [[Souvenir Land]]: Lornadoon
* [[Spoiled
* [[Supporting Leader]]: Parodied by Arrowroot.
* [[Taxonomic Term Confusion]]: There is an appearance by "six different phyla of giant insects". Insects, whatever their size, are a single ''class'' of phylum Arthropoda -- and you would think Harvard students would know that.
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* [[Weapons Grade Vocabulary]]: Goddam's war story.
* [[We Are Not Going Through That Again]]: Frito, having returned to his digs at the end of the story, is visited a mysterious stranger who thinks he's the kind of person that takes quests. He slams the door, locks it and swallows the key.
* [[What Happened to
* [[When Trees Attack]]: Subverted by Lord Birdseye and the Vee-Ates, who are not trees but giant vegetables.
* [[Who Writes This Crap?]]: "Observing this near impossible escape from certain death, Frito wondered how much longer the authors were going to get away with such tripe. He wasn't the only one."
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