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{{quote|''"Some people promise to read the news to you. I promise to ''feel'' the news ''at'' you."''}}
''[[The Colbert Report]]'' (pronounced Col-''[[It Is Pronounced "Tro-PAY"|bear]]'' Re-''[[Gratuitous French|pore]]'') was the Emmy award winning (Best Writing - Variety, 2008 and 2010) [[Spin-Off]] from ''[[The Daily Show]]'', featuring the screen persona of news anchor [[Stephen Colbert]]. Broadcast on [[Comedy Central]] between 2005 and 2014, it operated as a parody of news talk programs such as ''[[The O'Reilly Factor]]''
The character of Colbert himself could be best described as a [[Strawman Political]] of a news pundit, a mega-conservative who embodies all the stereotypes about conservative people in one convenient shell. Much like its progenitor, it [[News Parody|read the real news in a humorous tone]]. It also coined the words "truthiness" and "wikiality". The latter one is a portmanteau of [[Wikipedia]] and reality: basically the practice of [[Rewriting Reality]] by bringing democracy to information. "If enough people agree on it, it becomes true" -- the example given being Colbert's assertion that elephant populations had tripled since 31 January 2006. <ref>
Differed from its mother show in that it was a kind of [[Sitcom]] with guest stars playing themselves and a funny premise. Whereas ''[[The Daily Show]]'' is mainly Jon Stewart reading the news and making funny observations, ''
It should probably be noted ([[Don't Explain the Joke|or perhaps not]]) that Stephen Colbert, the fake news anchor, was, in fact, a character that Stephen Colbert, professional comedian, was playing. He does not believe the views he espoused on the show (for the most part), and has referred to the character as "a well-meaning, poorly informed, [[Upper Class Twit|high-status idiot]]."
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In 2014, ''The Colbert Report'' ended its run so that Stephen Colbert could take over the helm of ''[[Late Show with Stephen Colbert|The Late Show]]'' as [[David Letterman]]'s successor.
{{tropenamer}}
* [[Black Best Friend]]
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{{tropelist}}
== Tropes A
* [[Air Guitar]]: In the beginning of every 'Sport Report' segment Stephen rocks out on the air guitar. [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/183198/july-31-2007/sport-report---barry-bonds At one point he points out that he can play air guitar even with a broken wrist.]
* [[Alter Ego Acting]]: Colbert in character and Colbert out of character are two ''very'' different people.
* [[Altum Videtur]]: Stephen's fireplace has '[[wikipedia:Esse quam videri|VIDERI QUAM ESSE]]' engraved on it. Appropriately enough, the fireplace houses a monitor that displays an image of flickering burning logs.
* [[Always Someone Better]]: [[wikipedia:Anderson cooper|Anderson Cooper]].
* [[Amazing Technicolor Wildlife]]: The CGI eagle from the opening credits got a red-white-and-blue makeover in later seasons.
* [[Analogy Backfire]]:
** Stephen turns Rick Santorum's Iraq War ''[[The Lord of the Rings]]'' analogy into a an analogy backfire. Can be seen [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/76932/october-18-2006/santorum-s-iraqi-lord-of-the-rings here.] Since Stephen is a big [http://www.jerriblank.com/colbert_nytimes.html LOTR fan], he probably couldn't wait to sink his teeth into that one.
** Republican politician Andre Bauer compared poor people to animals which is an analogy backfire on its own, but [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/262595/january-26-2010/andre-bauer-is-not-against-animals Stephen of course made it even more of a backfire by following the analogy to its logical conclusion.]
** "I'm as straight as the Mississippi!"
* [[Anal Probing]]: A segment about an "Alien Hunter
* [[Anatomically-Impossible Sex]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/247265/august-20-2009/stephen-s-sound-advice---how-to-make-babies Stephen gives advice on how to make babies and he gets quite a few things wrong.]
* [[Animal Nemesis]]: Colbert loathes bears.
* [[Animate Inanimate Object]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/247151/august-19-2009/barney-frank-refuses-to-talk-to-a-dining-room-table Stephen is defeated in a health care reform debate by a table and a
* [[Appeal to Obscurity]]: He has done this a few times.
** Zombies allegedly caused destruction to an extent to warrant this. [http://thecolbertreport.cc.com/videos/yulr8u/threatdown---zombies].
* [[Arch Enemy]]: It changes from time to time:
** Early episodes featured David Cross playing Russ Lieber, a liberal inversion of Colbert's character, who over-thinks everything and is so hesitant to offend that he can't make a single statement without backpedaling.
** [[Korean Pop Music|Korean pop star]] Rain, who became Stephen's arch-nemesis due to [[Always Someone Better|taking cruel pleasure in beating him at things]].
** [[Kanye West]] has held this title.
** In one of his ''[[The Daily Show|Daily Show]]/Colbert Report'' conversations at the end of
** Eleanor Holmes Norton.
** Previously and briefly held by Helen Thomas.
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** [[Big Word Shout|NIBIRUUUUU!!!]]
** ''STEWART!!!''
** James Franco is now his renaissance enemy. Or "renemy".
** At one point, Stephen had a "war" with, of all things, Miracle Whip. It looks like it begun on October 15, 2009, [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/252726/october-15-2009/the-mayo-lution-will-not-be-televised when Stephen "attacked" the Miracle Whip commercials.] In response, Miracle Whip bought ad space on every commercial break during his November 12 show and well... [[Hilarity Ensues|Hilarity Ensued.]] [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jr9s8WO2t4M Now here's some cool people dancing.] And then there's Stephen's [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/255250/november-12-2009/miracle-whip-buys-ad-space response], which points out how Miracle Whip buying ad space on his show would give him money that he could use to buy more delicious [[Hoist by His Own Petard|mayo]].
** ''[[Jimmy Fallon|FALLON!!!]]''
* [[Armoured Closet Gay]]: Stephen [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/414120/may-10-2012/barack-obama-s-gay-blasphemy confirms that he works out to "prevent gay strokes
{{quote|'''Stephen''': I'm hitting the gym, getting pretty cut. And I'm shedding pounds by not cooking with butter. Instead I use it to grease up my body when I work out. That way, none of those stroke gays, or stro-mos as we call them at the gym, can get a handle on me.}}
* [[Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking]]: "I am
* [[Artistic License Military]]: Seriously, that drill Sergeant couldn't wait to get rid of him.
* [[Ascended Meme]]:
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* [[As the Good Book Says...]]: Taken [[Up to Eleven]]. [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/59606/february-27-2006/the-de-deification-of-the-american-faithscape "I believe in one God, the Father Almighty, maker of heaven and earth..."] Stephen Colbert really is a devout Catholic (he even teaches Sunday School, presumably why he can recite the Nicene Creed from memory).
* [[Attack of the Killer Whatever]]: A Styrofoam cup which Stephen had irradiated for several days in a microwave (to demonstrate the [[Strawman Political|Libertarian]] opposition to [[Don't Try This At Home|safety regulations]]) apparently grew to human-like size, developed limbs, and came back to attack him. On the show's website, the clip is marked ''[[Revenge of the Sequel|Revenge of the Styrofoam Cups]]''.
* [[Attention Whore]]: Mocked. Stephen inverts the traditional interview, where the subject comes onto the set to a round of applause. Instead, the subject sits in a corner of the set and Stephen does a victory lap to get the applause for himself before beginning the interview.
== Tropes B - D ==
* [[Background Halo]]:
* [[The Backwards R]]: "Cold War Update", done in faux Cyrillic.
* [[Bait and Switch Comment]]:
{{quote|'''Colbert''': (on ''[[Ninja Assassin]]'') "Yeah, impressive, but you know who you didn't see in that video? Me! ([[Beat]]) Who's the better ninja now?"}}
{{quote|'''Colbert''': I am on the South Carolina Republican primary like white
* [[Bait and Switch Comparison]]:
{{quote|'''Colbert''': We have a broadcast legend
* [[Berserk Button]]: During an [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/267561/march-17-2010/nell-irvin-painter interview with Neil Irvin Painter] she refers to the Scots Irish as properly Irish. Colbert promptly corrects (2:10) her with: "There's no Irish blood in Scots-Irish People. They are Scottish Presbyterians, who were given land in Ireland. THEY TOOK OUR LAND AND DROVE MY PEOPLE ACROSS THE RIVER SHANNON, WHERE WE WERE FORCED TO FARM ''ROCKS'' BY OLIVER CROMWELL AND I WILL SEE HIM ROT IN HELL BEFORE YOU CALL SCOTS-IRISH PEOPLE IRISH! ''DO YOU WANNA FIGHT?!''" Then they arm wrestle.
** ''Do not'' steal his Super PAC money ([[Jon Stewart]]) or call him out on pointless spending (Nancy Pelosi)- he ''will'' chase you down and make you pay.
* [[Big No]]: Colbert is ''extremely'' fond of this trope. For example, after seeing how terrible he looks in [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/213635/december-10-2008/threatdown---happiness pink
{{quote|'''Stephen:''' I LOOK TERRIBLE IN PINK! I'M A WINTER!}}
** Also, when sugar runs low, he panics and tears into a ''whole bag
* [[Big Ol' Eyebrows]]: Not physically big, but his eyebrows are often [[Large Ham|Large Hams]] in their own right.
* [[Bizarro Universe]]:
** [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/104543/october-02-2007/the-word---troops-out-now When Stephen was discussing parallel universes], he was suddenly replaced with a long-haired pipe-smoking hippie counterpart who wanted to solve the Iraq war by making everyone share M&M's and hug each other. Also, Esteban Colberto who in our universe hosts the Spanish News/Variety show "Colberto Reporto Gigante" complete with "Chicas".
** Also a brief [[Imagine Spot]] where
** And the [[Evil Twin]] universe shown in an interview clip (although there were indications that it was just Evil Twin Colbert interviewing the normal-interviewee-wearing-facial-hair).
** And when he had Steve Carell on, it was introduced as the "Carell Corral", as Stephen had gone to Hollywood, while Steve had gotten his own show... but [[All Just a Dream|it was all just a dream]]. [[Or Was It a Dream?]]? [[Body Horror|{reveal horse hoof hand}]] [[Big No|NNNNNNOOOOOOOO!!!!!!]]
* [[Black Best Friend]]
* [[The Blind Leading the Blind]]: Stephen lives this trope, but it is especially highlighted in the ''Stephen's Sound Advice'' segments.
* [[Bread, Eggs, Breaded Eggs]]:
{{quote|And finally, the #1 threat. What's it going to be? Robots, or bears? It's Robot bears!}}
* [[Briar Patching]]: Colbert forbids [[Banksy]] from vandalizing his studio's walls [http://thecolbertreport.cc.com/videos/d10tae/banksy-s-new-york-reign-of-terror].
* [[Brass Balls]]: [[Stephen Colbert]] talks about his brass balls quite often. They're the only thing that give him the guts to speak [[Strawman Political|the truth]].
* [[Breaking the Fourth Wall]]:
** During his appearance on the show in September 2011, [[Al Gore]] mentioned Colbert's "character." Holding back laughter, Colbert responded: "My character? [[Obfuscating Stupidity|What the hell are you talking about]], sir? ...
* [[Brick Joke]]: Because segments of "The Word" take so long to get back to the initial Word, it sometimes takes the viewer by surprise.
** Also a [[Running Gag]]. Michael Stipe (formerly of R.E.M.) lives on Stephen's bookshelf.
** During a segment focused on teaching monkeys how to recognize ads, one of the facts is they're aroused by the private parts of the opposite sex. Stephen jokingly puts up a picture of a monkey vagina with a caption telling the males to "Eat Jello
* [[Butt Monkey]]:
** Poor Bobby.
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*** [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/60608/march-21-2006/employee-performance-reviews Stephen performs a humiliating employee performance review with Bobby.]
** Tad also had moments of this.
** Jay the Intern.
* [[Call Back]]:
{{quote|In the May 10, 2012 episode, Stephen tells a story of a monkey who had accidentally swallowed a peanut, causing the zookeeper to lick the monkey's butt (in order for the monkey to defecate). At the end of the episode, Stephen pulls out a can of Planter's.}}
* [[Calling the Old Man Out]]: Aimed at idol "Papa Bear" Bill O'Reilly. [[Played for Laughs]].
* [[Cannot Spit It Out]]: In this [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/250604/september-29-2009/cheating-death---snus---placebo-effect hilarious Cheating Death] segment.
* [[Canis Latinicus]]: The motto for his Iraq shows? "Veritasiness
* [[Catch Phrase]]:
** "George Bush: great president or greatest president?"
** "X or Y? Pick a side, we're at war."
** Tons of variations on this:
{{quote|...that's a fact, and nothing can convince me otherwise. [a beat] Here to convince me otherwise...}}
** "Checkmate!" or "I just nailed you." when interviewing people he disagrees with. Sometimes when the audience is clapping for the guest, he'll say "I haven't nailed him yet but thanks."
** "[X], please!"
** Whenever a guest agrees with him (usually on a very minor point) "Apology accepted."
** At the beginning of shows: "Nation, in here, out there..."
** "This is America."
** "I don't see race, people tell me I'm white and I believe them because I <stereotypical white trait/hobby>."
** "Nation, anyone who watches this show regularly knows that I love/hate <topic/person he's never mentioned before>."
* [[Celebrity Is Overrated]]: Stephen doesn't think so. "[[Studio Audience|You people]] are like water in the desert."
* [[Character Blog]]: The @stephenathome Twitter.
* [[Chekhov's Gun]]: An unintentional one in [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/127665/october-31-2007/obama-s-grit-off-challenge this episode] when Stephen forgot about the mousetrap that he had placed on his desk earlier in the show.
* [[China Takes Over the World]]: Alluded to in [http://www.indecisionforever.com/2011/06/30/listen-live-to-stephen-colberts-speech-at-the-fec/?xrs=share_red this clip.]
* [[Christmas Special]]: "A Colbert Christmas: The Greatest Gift of All".
** [[Christmas Songs]]: "Another Christmas Song", which is all about getting people to buy "Another Christmas Song" so Stephen can collect the royalties. Also an [[Anti-Christmas Song]] performed by Toby Keith, about the alleged [[Strawman Political|left-wing]] "war on Christmas" and how [[Patriotic Fervor|real Americans]] will [[Stuff Blowing Up|fight back]].
** [[Real Life Relative]]: The [[Heartwarming Orphan|Heartwarming Orphans]] are his kids.
** [[Saving Christmas]]: ...for him.
** [[Special Effects Failure]]: [[Invoked Trope|on purpose]], and in buckets.
** [[Stylistic Suck]]:
* [[Chroma Key]]:
** Formidable Opponent, in which Stephen debates himself, and the Green Screen Challenges.
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* [[Corpsing]]: Stephen tends to break character and laugh over some of the more ridiculous lines, or at least grin the whole time he's saying them. There is an actual video tag on his site called [http://www.colbertnation.com/video/tag/cracks+up "cracks up"] for when he does this. He and Jon Stewart have done this to each other quite often; if one of them loses it, the other will soon follow.
* [[Couch Gag]]:
** The introductory text that appears next to Stephen also changes on occasion. This has ranged from words such as "Megamerican" to "Lincolnish", "Libertease", and "SCILF
** Before the Vancouver shows "Sponsored by Verizon. They paid for this."
* [[Crowd Chant]]: Stephen Colbert often leads his audience in chants of "U.S.A!" or "I was right!" in this rhythm. And, of course, the show usually starts with enthusiastic chants of "Ste-
* [[Crying Wolf]]: Stephen warns about crying wolf or rather crying zombie in [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/187340/october-07-2008/threatdown---zombies the end of this clip] about college students playing zombie tag. According to Stephen this game will leave us vulnerable when the rage virus escapes.
* [[Cult]]: "So congratulations Apple [on your new iPad]. Speaking of cults-- [Happyology]."
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** He couldn't help but admit that [[Arch Enemy|Rain]] dressed up in a hedgehog costume was adorable. Or that Rain in general is adorable.
* [[Dagwood Sandwich]]: After seeing a burger where the buns were replaced with grilled cheese sandwiches, Colbert contemplated a grilled cheese sandwich where the bread was replaced with grilled cheese sandwiches... ''ad infinitum''. "Prepare yourselves nation, for I have invented... [[Crowning Moment of Funny|The Mobius Melt]]", a sandwich that you theoretically cannot stop eating. He then recalls his other favorite fractal sandwich, the "Mandelbrot BLT -- the more you zoom in, the more bacon there is. What will explode first, your heart, or your mind?"
* [[A Date with Rosie Palms]]: The cure for Restless Leg Syndrome is [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/382616/april-25-2011/cheating-death---vaxa-international--lap-band-surgery---restless-leg-syndrome Restless Hand Syndrome.]
* [[Deal with the Devil]]: In the 2014 midterm coverage of the elections, Stephen preforms a ritual and sells his soul to the devil to get early results on who wins Alaska.
* [[Death by Gluttony]]: The Mandel-BLT, where the bacon approaches infinite density as you zoom in. What will explode first? Your heart, or your mind?
* [[Department of Redundancy Department]]: "Americans for a Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow".
* [[Detournement]]: Carrying neo-conservative punditry a few bridges too far.
* [[Did Not Do the Research]]: In his interview with Maurice Sendak, Colbert incorrectly states that Vin Diesel was in
* [[Double Vision]]: Formidable Opponent. Bonus points that they're usually [[Color Coded for Your Convenience]]- one wears a red tie (Conservative bias) and the other wears a blue tie (Liberal bias).
* [[Dream Within a Dream]]: Colbert has one of these after he knocks himself unconscious [http://thecolbertreport.cc.com/videos/vbghld/domino-s-pizza-drone.]
* [[Drill Sergeant Nasty]]: Encounters a [[Real Life|real]] one for his bit of basic training prior to "Operation Iraqi Stephen".
* [[Dropped a Bridge on Him]]: Done jokingly with Bobby the stage manager (Eric Drysdale), who was ''barbecued and eaten by Stephen'' in his farewell appearance. When Bobby's ghost came back for a guest spot like a kind of Jacob Marley, Stephen ate the ghost, too.
* [[Droste Image]]: The portrait in the studio of Stephen is one of these, more so with each passing year. The original portrait showed Stephen standing in front and to the left of a portrait of himself. In the show's first episode, at one point Stephen came back from a commercial break standing in front and to the left of the portrait saying [[Hypocritical Humor|"What's the most important thing a TV journalist needs? Humility."]] Each anniversary the portrait has been replaced with a new one showing Stephen standing in front of the previous one:
** 1st: To the left.
** 2nd: To the right, arms crossed, glowering over his lack of an Emmy.
** 3rd: To the left, holding an Emmy.
** 4th: To the right, wearing a military uniform and haircut, saluting (in honor of his visit to Iraq).
** 5th: To the left, wearing an olive wreath on his head (in honor of the ''Report'''s sponsorship of the U.S. Olympic
** 6th: To the right, holding the F.E.C. ruling allowing him to form his SuperPAC.
== E - H ==
* [[Eagle Land]]: Stephen is so patriotic he fathered a baby Bald Eagle. The San Francisco Zoo named a newly hatched male bird 'Stephen Jr.'. Really, all you need to know about the show is that the eagle in the opening credits is named Liberty.
* [[Edit War]]: Colbert has publicly incited a few of these over at [[The Other Wiki]].
* [[Egocentric Team Naming]]:
* [["El Niño" Is Spanish for "The Nino"]]: "Grow a pair of whatever the Mexican word is for ''cojones''."
* [[Enforced Plug]]: Stephen parodies this often with Doritos, once even spending an entire week on location in "Chili-delphia, the city of brotherly crunch." In a weird sort of reverse [[Product Placement]], Doritos hadn't actually paid him when he started the gag, but apparently a deal has been reached involving the large exchange of Nacho Cheese Doritos.
** In [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/232016/june-25-2009/commonsense-health-care-reform-infomercial a segment about health care], Stephen suddenly drinks and enjoys Sierra Mist.
* [[Erotic Eating]]: [http://www.thedailyshow.com/video/index.jhtml?videoId=108395&title=Prince-Charles-Scandal The banana
** [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/80965/january-17-2007/better-know-a-district---washington-s-3rd---brian-baird There's also the bit with the sausage near the end of this clip...] The fact that Baird is a psychologist just makes it that much better.
** [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/414516/may-29-2012/who-s-honoring-me-now----peabody-awards---maxim-s-hot-100 This clip] has Stephen discussing how he was one of Maxim's Hot 100, then [[Invoked Trope|licks a lollipop]] to demonstrate.
* [[Even the Guys Want Him]]: While in Vancouver for the 2010 Winter Games, a camera pan over the crowd revealed one cardboard sign bearing the words ''"Marry me Stephen! (It's legal here!)"''.
* [[Everything's Worse with Bears|Everything's Worse With]]:...
* [[The Fair Folk]]: Colbert suspects presidential candidate Dennis Kucinich of being an elf with [[Hammerspace]] pockets.
* [[Fake Band]]: Stephen and the Colberts. Then got [[Defictionalized]] and now [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/59061/february-09-2006/charlene--i-m-right-behind-you- ''Charlene (I'm Right Behind You)''] is on [[Rock Band]].
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* [[Feigning Intelligence]]/[[Obfuscating Stupidity]]: Coupled with [[I've Heard of That! What Is It?]] Stephen frequently uses a word correctly in a sentence, then admits he has no idea what it means. It is unclear whether the character is feigning stupidity or feigning intelligence.
{{quote|'''Stephen:''' We need a new leader soon because America is standing at a precipice. Which, I think, is either a bonfire or a poisonous Australian jellyfish.}}
* [[Flowery Insults]]: Usually "[''Job description''], and [''flowery insult''], [''Person's name'']".
** "Minority leader, and septuagenarian ninja turtle, Mitch McConnell."
** "Texas GOP congressman, and human fence post, Louie Gohmert."
** "Pundit, and part-time weather balloon, Rush Limbaugh."
** "Florida congresswoman, and home-perm after model, Debbie Wasserman Schultz."
* [[Flynning]]: Colbert and Elijah Wood, both of them using versions of [[The Lord of the Rings|Sting]] (Colbert brandishing one given to him by [[Peter Jackson]]).
* [[Food Porn]]: One of Stephen's SuperPAC ads blasts other SuperPACs for pandering to Iowa voters with "cheap cornography" and says Iowans deserve better, and then shows slow-motion footage of corn set to porn music.
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{{quote|"It was just a simple Freudian slip. Named, of course, after [[Sigmund Freud]]. I'm sorry that's my mom. Jimmy, put up my mom. I mean, my breasts. I mean, Freud.}}
* [[Frivolous Lawsuit]]: Colbert being told by his lawyer brother the many words he can't say during the Vancouver Olympics shows (including "Vancouver" and "Olympics").
* [[Fun with Acronyms]]: NASA's new space treadmill: the "'''C'''ombined '''O'''perational '''L'''oad '''B'''earing '''E'''xternal '''R'''esistance '''T'''readmill" ('''C.O.L.B.E.R.T.''') And now there's [https://web.archive.org/web/20170331122951/http://anon.nasa-global.edgesuite.net/anon.nasa-global/ccvideos/colbert_tranfer.asx video] of it being installed on the ISS.
* [[Germanic Depressive]]: Recurring character and German ambassador to the UN, Hans Beinholtz.
* [[Get a Hold of Yourself, Man!]]: "No! Get a grip Colber'''t'''!" and various alternate phrasings.
* [[Getting Crap Past the Radar]]: Apparently, Stephen Colbert refers to his Australian '''Formula 401''' cans' contents as [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/309266/may-11-2010/australian-sperm-shortage crock juice
** There is a [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/183194/july-31-2007/smokin--pole---arc--who-goes-there- series of segments] dealing with Arctic issues called Smokin' Pole.
** Several of his SuperPAC heroes have included: Suq Madiq, Harry Balzac, Harry Balsagna, Apoop Mapanz, and Mike Clitoris. And let's not forget the one that really made him crack up- Munchma Quchi.
** During a segment about monkeys learning how to buy things and read sexually hypnotic billboards,
* [[Giving Someone the Pointer Finger]]: One of Colbert's favorite poses.
** Not to mention his Tip of the Hat
* [[A God Am I]]: Upon introducing [[Conservapedia]]'s Conservative Bible Project to Colbert Nation, Colbert then commanded the masses to add him into it as a biblical figure - perhaps Moses, or [[Important Haircut|Samson]] - or...
{{quote|"The point is, you don't have to make me God himself. But if that happens, hey - I get it."}}
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* [[Green-Skinned Space Babe]]: Tek Jansen's "hundreds of girlfriends".
* [[Gut Feeling]]: Colbert considers this the only valid way to make a decision.
* [[Hammerspace]]: The unseen part of Stephen Colbert's desk contains [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/77580/october-30-2006/stay-the-course a fax machine, a stay the course notebook], telephone, [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/221836/march-16-2009/stephen-s-angry-mob-will-crush-aig pitchfork] (and presumably other [[Angry Mob]] accoutrements), a Big Red Button, [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/210507/november-13-2008/rahm-emanuel-s-finger Rahm Emanuel's finger], Abraham Lincoln's skull, a Starbucks, a ''rival'' Starbucks (now defunct), a Foot Locker, the Atone Phone for apologetic Jews, [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/164878/april-02-2008/threatdown---nipples a suitcase with John Oliver inside], a (probably endless) supply of [[Trademark Favorite Food|Ben & Jerry's Americone Dream,]] a washing machine, and [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/216621/january-26-2009/stephen-s-secret-prison a secret prison for terrorists until it was closed.] As of April 8, 2009, the desk also yielded three Jewish slaves (whom Stephen promptly freed), and he admitted it also has a few Asians and a pyramid (incomplete
** As of August 2011, he has a chicken and bars of gold stored under there, along with other potential forms of currency if the economy collapses. In February 2012, he produced [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/408881/february-21-2012/colbert-super-pac---nancy-pelosi-s-ad---barack-obama-s-super-pac?xrs=share_copy two kittens], named Whiskers and Other Whiskers.
* [[Have I Mentioned I Am Heterosexual Today?]]: [[Transparent Closet|Absolutely]], [[Blatant Lies|he is]]!
* [[Heavy Metal Umlaut|Heävy Mëtal Ümlaut]]: The Wørd.
* [[Her Codename Was Mary Sue]]: Tek Jansen, a [[Captain Space, Defender of Earth!]], who has "obviously had hundreds of girlfriends
* [[Heterosexual Life Partners]]: When does Sir Dr. Stephen T Colbert DFA plan on retiring? [[The Daily Show|Half an hour after Jon Stewart.]]
* [[Hilariously Abusive Childhood]]: [[Multiple Choice Past|Varies]]. Much more explicit in ''I Am America'', including the [[Footnote Fever|margin note]].
{{quote|'''''I HAD A HAPPY CHILDHOOD.'''''}}
* [[Hitler Ate Sugar]]: Charles Manson believes in global warming.
* [[Hitler's Time Travel Exemption Act]]: Zigzagged in Colbert's book Operation Javelin. [http://
* [[Hollywood Atheist]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/182201/august-21-2006/atheists-in-foxholes Stephen of course] has an [[Hollywood Atheist]] view on atheists.
* [[Homage]]: He carried and swung a golf club on stage in Iraq, explicitly stating it was in homage to [[Bob Hope]].
* [[Hostile Show Takeover]]: Albeit a very brief one, on May 4th, 2010's show. [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/308736/may-04-2010/the-word---flight-risk Michael J. Fox only wanted to sell his book....]
* [[Hurricane of Puns]]:
** [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/393043/july-25-2011/vaginal-puppeteering-vs--d--k-scrub Summer's Eve vaginal puppeteer ads
* [[Hypocritical Humor]]:
** Rare for this show, this instance happened to be unintentional. On the topic of Texas governor Rick Perry's inarticulacy, Colbert said, "Some of our greatest presidents have been tongue-tied on occasion," backing it up with a clip from [[George W. Bush]]'s [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eKgPY1adc0A "Fool Me Once" flob
** Stephen Colbert informs [[Seth Meyers]] that making fun of the news is inappropriate.
== I - L ==
* [[I Call It Vera]]: Sweetness.
* [[I Just Shot Marvin in the Face]]: We all knew [[Chekhov's Gun|Sweetness was going to go off eventually]]. He later repeats the incident, accidentally shooting an audience member in the leg ''[[Finger Gun|with his finger]]
* [[Important Haircut]]: Ordered by ''President [[Barack Obama]]'' and done by ''Commander Gen. Odierno'' no less, to show that he'd really gone through (a little) basic training. [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/229768/june-08-2009/obama-orders-stephen-s-haircut---ray-odierno See it all here
** Looking back on it, he thinks his hair never grew back the same.
* [[Incredibly Lame Pun]]:
{{quote|'''Guest:''' Jesus said, "I am divine, and you are the branches."
'''Colbert:''' ...Sir, God does not approve of puns.
'''Colbert:''' ...But specifically it is a affront to the Christmas Trees' Lord and savior, '''Treesus'''
** [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/308073/april-27-2010/current-events---taser-armed-robots---meth-sheep Greatest Pun Of All Time!] Four minutes of buildup for one pun, but so very worth it. Also a [[Crowning Moment of Funny]].
* [[Insane Troll Logic]]: Very intentional, and very funny.
* [[Insult to Rocks]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/177952/july-30-2008/canton-apology In the midst] of heaping abuse on Canton, Kansas, Stephen says that converting the town to a landfill would be an insult to landfills.
* [[Intentional Engrish for Funny]]: Happens in one episode where he discusses a Chinese millionaire who was killed by poisoned cat stew. He says that this doesn't affect his Chinese canned cat meat stew, "Colonel Tuxedo's Happy Joy Power Cat With Eating". Its motto is "Reliable Sting of Pleasure, Trustworthy of Lunch".
* [[Internet Counterattack]]: Invoked frequently. Notable instances include a campaign to get a bridge in Hungary named after him through internet voting, and against [[The Other Wiki|Wikipedia]] to [[Retconning the Wiki|enforce "wikiality
* [[Intoxication Ensues]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/167613/may-08-2008/r-i-p--albert-hoffman The "little stamps" presented to Colbert by his interns, which turn out to be LSD.]
* [[Irishman and a Jew]]: ''The Colbert Report'''s [[The Daily Show|sister show]] is anchored by Jon Stewart (born ''Jonathan Liebowitz''). The dynamic between the two seems to tap into this old [[Vaudeville]] trope, though probably quite unintentionally. As in most such pairings, the Jewish half is [[Deadpan Snarker|sarcastic]] and exasperated with [[Crapsack World|a world gone mad]]. In contrast, Colbert (who self-identifies as Irish-American) is [[Small Name, Big Ego|irrationally self-confident]] and [[The Ditz|totally]] [[Too Dumb to Live|oblivious]] to the world around him, in keeping with the Irish half of [[wikipedia:Burns and allen|many such pairings]]. It probably helps that Colbert's [[Patriotic Fervor|patriotism]] would put even [[wikipedia:George M Cohan|George M. Cohan]] to shame.
* [[Is This Thing Still On?]]: Stephen has had several such incidents.
** There was the [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/25082/november-08-2005/intercepted-satellite-feed Ching Chong Ding Dong incident.]
** He also had an [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/168451/may-13-2008/bill-o-reilly-inside-edition angry rant] very similar to Bill O'Reilly.
* [[It Got Worse]]: Stephen's assertion that Jon Stewart's Rally to Restore Sanity
* [[It Is Pronounced "Tro-PAY"]]: ''The '''Colbear Repore'''''. The T in 'Report' is silent, because "it's French, [[This Is for Emphasis, Bitch|bitch]]" and because his name also ends in a silent 't'.
** Except when
{{quote|"Snap out of it, Col-burt!"}}
** During the [[Writers Strike]] of 2007, when Colbert would go on the air without his writing staff, he would deliberately refer to the show as "The Col'''bert''' Re'''port'''" as a sign of solidarity with his writers.
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* [[Kick the Dog]]: In an effort to be declared the Worst Person in the World by [[Keith Olbermann|Olbermann]], Stephen slapped a baby with a puppy. [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/238640/july-15-2009/stephen-wants-to-be-the-worst-person-in-the-world Could have been seen here] if it wasn't for the fact that there was an unfortunate technical mishap preventing anyone from seeing it happen.
* [[Kill the Poor]]: Stephen has, on at least one occasion, equated the "War on Poverty" with the "War on Drugs" and has wondered why we haven't yet made poverty illegal.
** During one banter segment with Jon Stewart at the end of ''[[The Daily Show]]'
{{quote|Like ''[[Gratuitous Spanish|mis hermanos]]'' The [[Dead Kennedys]] say, "Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill the poor!"}}
** When offering solutions to help the poor and unemployed without having to raise taxes for the wealthy, Colbert suggested that rich people should buy the natural rights of poorer individuals and took [[Jonathan Swift]]'s ''[[A Modest Proposal]]'' seriously, calling for poor children to be sold as food for extra cash.
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* [[The Krampus]]: Stephen decides to join forces with Krampus to fight the eeeeeevil liberal secularists' War on Christmas. He offers Krampus some cookies and milk, which Krampus promptly whips with a rusty chain, then threatens to drag Stephen to Hell.
* [[Kwyjibo]]: When it is announced that Scrabble will allow proper names to be used Stephen announces his new middle name [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/269930/april-06-2010/scrabble-allows-proper-names Qxyzzy.] In short, he's made up a word worth an obnoxious amount of points.
* [[Lampshade Hanging]]: When discussing that "all things must come to an end
* [[Large Ham]]: Oh, yes.
** Since Karl Rove refuses to come on the show, his substitute is literally a large canned ham with glasses. The resemblance is amazing.
* [[Le Film Artistique]]: His parody of ''[[The Artist]]'', ''[[Transformers: Dark of the Moon|Transformateurs: Noir de la lune]]'', including [[Gratuitous French]] and [[The End - or Is It?]].
* [[Left It In]]: Commonly [[Played for Laughs]].
* [[The Little Shop That Wasn't There Yesterday]]: Invoked by Stephen in [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/313508/june-24-2010/put-the-cursed-monkey-paw-down this segment.] Stephen concludes that things keep going wrong in the
* [[Logic Bomb]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/386852/may-18-2011/breaking-newt Stephen tried to have his Pandertron 8000 interpret some doubletalk from Newt Gingrich
* [[LOLcats]]: See [[Ascended Meme]] above.
* [[Loophole Abuse]]: In a [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/181202/november-15-2005/formidable-opponent---torture segment of] ''Formidable Opponent'' where Stephen debates himself one of the Stephens argue that torture is constitutional. The constitution might forbid ''cruel and unusual punishment'' but that's not a problem according to Stephen if torture is used so often it is no longer unusual.
** Stephen's campaign to get a bridge named after himself in Hungary on the grounds that there was no rule stating the namesake of the bridge had to be Hungarian.
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* [[Mathematician's Answer]]:
{{quote|'''Stephen:''' So do you celebrate Christmas or Hanukkah?
'''Bobby:''' Sure.
* [[Mega Corp]]: Stephen often shills for The Prescott Group. A shady conglomerate with companies such as Prescott Pharmaceutical, Prescott Oil and Prescott Finance.
* [[Men Don't Cry]]: Except when [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/216580/january-20-2009/stephen-s-inauguration-breakdown they] [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/343140/august-05-2010/how-to-ruin-same-sex-marriages do
* [[Monkeys on a Typewriter]]: A June 2006 segment discusses how many monkeys are required to produce the works of various authors.▼
* [[Metaphorgotten]]:
{{quote|This of course is [[The Lord of the Rings|Aragorn's]] sword Andúril, Flame of the West, forged from the shards of Narsil, given to me by [[Viggo Mortensen]]. Now, this has nothing to do with the metaphor -- I just want to remind everyone that I have this.}}
▲* [[Monkeys on a Typewriter]]: A June 2006 segment discusses how many monkeys are required to produce the works of various authors.
* [[Mood Whiplash]]: Any time that a serious tragedy occurs, the tone can get pretty somber at times, in sharp contrast to the comedic aspect of the show.
** As in [http://www.colbertnation.com/full-episodes/mon-july-25-2011-brian-cox this example], where Stephen takes a couple of shots at an elderly gay couple<ref> "I don't know how you're going to break this to your parents. It's gonna kill them." [[Don't Explain the Joke|The couple were 77 and 85 at the time.]]</ref> who are the first to be married in the state of New York. The mood quickly changes when he covers the [[wikipedia:2011 Norway attacks#Ut.C3.B8ya massacre|massacre of 80 in Norway]].
* [[Moral Dissonance]]: On [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/401093/october-31-2011/tip-wag---scott-walker-s-gun-freedom---true-north-s-healthcare-bartering a segment about low-income patients paying medical bills with their time] (starts around 1:25), the audience reacted badly to a joke about having a perforated colon patient as a guitar teacher, but laughed at the idea of using a coma patient as a Swiffer. [[In and Out of Character|Colbert's reaction]]: [[What the Hell, Hero?]]
{{quote|'''Colbert''': Oh? That's
* [[Motor Mouth]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/182426/november-28-2006/the-word---ecu-menace The Nicene Creed.] Also shown when you mention he's the youngest of eleven children: "JimmyEddieMaryBillyMargoTommyJayLuluPaulPeterStephen."
* [[Mr. Fanservice]]: Seriously, don't believe us? Three words: [[Jane Fonda]] Interview. It's all the proof you need. Invoked with Sexy Hotdog Man.
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** [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/59061/february-09-2006/charlene--i-m-right-behind-you- Before he was a newsman he was in Stephen and the Colberts and before that he was a carnival roustabout.]
** [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/250626/october-01-2009/2016-olympics-in-chicago---george-wendt Back in the 80's Stephen had a radio show in Chicago.]
** When Ricky Martin came out as gay, Stephen showed that he's a longtime Martin fan by playing a (fake) clip of himself as a local news anchor. In the clip, Stephen mentions "She Bangs
* [[Mushroom Samba]]: Colbert has taken blotter acid on the show a couple of times (both as a joke). The first time, he ''licked an entire sheet of 10x10 blotter acid'' and sat in his set's "fireplace" (which was really just a flat-screen displaying a burning fireplace; Colbert thought it was real). The other time it was part of a "Cheating Death" segment in which Prescott Pharmaceuticals issued what was essentially blotter acid. And before he did it, he said, "Let's take a magic carpet ride!" Both times, ''his'' smiling face appeared on the front.
* [[Must Have Caffeine]]: Colbert's... [[Fetish Fuel|interesting]] relationship with coffee.
* [[My Friends and Zoidberg]]: All major countries, and Norway
* [[My God, What Have I Done?]]: Colbert about a "fake" gay relationship entered solely in order to turn a man off the idea of gay marriage forever.▼
* [[N-Word Privileges]]: Since Colbert doesn't see race, not having this is one of the ways he knows he's white.▼
* [[New Media Are Evil]]. [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-collections/310359/colbert-s-best-blogger-moments?current_video=183212 Stephen takes on the bloggers with the help of Papa Bear.]
* [[Nice Guy]]: Real-life Stephen. A suspiciously high proportion of interviews with him include some variation on "nicest man in the world", and his main worry when the show was pitched was that he wouldn't be able to handle [[Mean Character, Nice Actor|playing an asshole]].
* [[No Except Yes]]: On a proposal in Alabama to use prisoners to replace migrant workers:
{{quote|'''Colbert''': This plan worked perfectly in Georgia
* [[No Good Deed Goes Unpunished]]: Stephen uses those exact words in [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/181218/november-17-2005/no-good-deed this clip about Barney Frank.]▼
* [[Noisy Nature]]: That eagle cry in the opening credits does ''not'' sound like an eagle.
* [[No Party Like a Donner Party]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/166724/april-21-2008/global-food-shortage In one episode, Colbert discussed a particularly alarmist spin on the looming food shortages...] [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/185581/april-21-2008/farewell-to-bobby and ended it by apparently eating his stage manager Bobby.] (And in the meantime [[Meat-O-Vision|imagining Bobby as a giant chicken rotisserie]]). And in a later episode, he ate Bobby's ghost.▼
▲* [[No Good Deed Goes Unpunished]]: Stephen uses those exact words in [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/181218/november-17-2005/no-good-deed this clip about Barney Frank.]
* [[No Kill Like Overkill]]: "That was not stripmining; that's how I hunt quail."
▲* [[No Party Like a Donner Party]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/166724/april-21-2008/global-food-shortage In one episode, Colbert discussed a particularly alarmist spin on the looming food shortages...] [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/185581/april-21-2008/farewell-to-bobby and ended it by apparently eating his stage manager Bobby
* [[Not That Kind of Doctor]]: Stephen has a honorary doctorate in fine arts. This doesn't stop him from presenting "Cheating Death", his segment on illness, health, and pharmaceuticals, with the name "Dr. Stephen T. Colbert, DFA".
* [[Obsession Song]]: Charlene (I'm right behind you).▼
▲* [[N-Word Privileges]]: Since Colbert doesn't see race, not having this is one of the ways he knows he's white.
* [[One-Hour Work Week]]: How is he supposed to read a book as big as
▲* [[Obsession Song]]: Charlene (I'm right behind you)
* [[Only Known by Their Nickname]]: Bill Kilmeade of ''FOX & Friends'' is always referred to as "Brown-haired guy who is not Steve Doocy."▼
▲* [[One-Hour Work Week]]: How is he supposed to read a book as big as the Great Gatsby when he has to work a half-hour a night, 4 nights a week!?[http://thecolbertreport.cc.com/videos/1i7t2j/colbert-s-book-club---learning--the-great-gatsby-]
* [[OOC Is Serious Business]]: If Colbert ''ever'' drops out of character, even if only for a moment, and starts speaking as himself, you know what's being discussed is serious.
▲* [[Only Known by Their Nickname]]: Bill Kilmeade of 'FOX & Friends' is always referred to as "Brown-haired guy who is not Steve Doocy"
* [[Opinion Myopia]]: Played for laughs. If someone doesn't agree with Stephen, he will twist the words to make it sound like it's actually an agreement.
* [[Oral Fixation Fixation]]: Stephen often licks things, not to mention his pen-chewing habit.
* [[Oscar Bait]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/232655/july-02-2009/re-report---lost-treasures-of-babylon "For your Oscar consideration
* [[Out of Focus]]: Remember "Better Know a District"? Or the "On Notice" and "Dead to Me" boards? Those were fun.
* [[Overly Long Gag]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/267053/march-09-2010/consumer-alert---pringles Which Pringles flavor is ''not'' being recalled?]
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** Stephen showed [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/186475/september-30-2008/prescott-oil-loves-the-earth this commercial from his sponsor Prescott Oil.] Parody of the [[We Care]] commercial.
** Stephen has also made his own [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/252726/october-15-2009/the-mayo-lution-will-not-be-televised extreme ad for mayo.] Parody of the [[Totally Radical]] commercial.
** In a [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/182762/march-20-2007/willie-recall parody of attack ads], Stephen attacks Willie Nelson. Stephen is not happy that Willie also got an ice cream
** Stephen shows a few [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/270035/april-08-2010/tiger-s-nike-commercial rejected versions] of a Tiger Woods Nike commercial.
** Stephen showed [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/258566/december-15-2009/prescott-financial---gold--women---sheep this ad] telling you to stock up on gold, women and sheep before the apocalypse.
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* [[Pass the Popcorn]]: [http://i49.tinypic.com/2z4wlzr.gif This .gif] has started to show up as a response to internet drama.
* [[Pizza Boy Special Delivery]]: ''[http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/60692/march-22-2006/better-know-a-district---california-s-27th---brad-sherman Fresh Hot Slice]'' with Representative Brad Sherman. And another time with a UAV [http://thecolbertreport.cc.com/videos/vbghld/domino-s-pizza-drone].
* [[Play-Along Prisoner]]:
{{quote|'''Stephen''': A zoo is nothing but monkey prison. Which means this monkey has made this zookeeper his bitch.}}
* [[Played for Laughs]]: Obviously. Every trope that isn't already a comedy trope is played for laughs.
* [[Political Correctness Gone Mad]]:
{{quote|'''Stephen''': (''on interdimensional black people'') These minorities are
* [[Porn Stache]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/79560/december-14-2006/caesar-honeybee-or-tyrone-hunnibi- Stephen is rocking the porn stache in his hypothetical gay porn career.]
* [[Portmanteau Couple Name]]:
* [[The Power of Rock]]: His guitar duel with Wilco.
* [[Precision F-Strike]]: Colbert uses these to expert hilarious effect.
{{quote|'''Colbert''': ''(strokes his gun Sweetness)'' "All-You-Can-Eat" means "All-You-Can-Eat-For-Life!" We're gonna get us some banana pudding, motherfuckers!}}
{{quote|'''Colbert''': ''Sarah Palin is a fucking retard!'' [["Just Joking" Justification|See, it's just satire.]]}}
** Also had one when Jimmy Fallon got his revenge on Stephen. Initially, Stephen claimed that Jimmy would match the $26,000 auction price for Stephen's portrait (which went to charity clearinghouse Donors Choose), and donate said $26,000 to Donors Choose. Jimmy replied that he had never said such a thing. Rather than turn it into another mock feud, Jimmy instead challenged viewers of both shows to donate $26,000 within a week to Donors Choose. If so, then Jimmy claimed Stephen would come on ''Late Night With [[Jimmy Fallon]]'' and sing [[Covered Up|Rebecca Black's "Friday"]] with The Roots. Stephen's response: WTF?!... and he later did go on Fallon's show and [[Crowning Moment of Awesome|and sing the song.]]
* [[Pretentious Latin Motto]]: [[wikipedia:Esse quam videri|"Videri Quam Esse"]] is engraved above the (fake) fireplace - it means [[Lampshade Hanging|"to seem to be rather than to be."]]
* [[Product Placement]]:
** His 2008 presidential run was "sponsored by Doritos", his quest for a spot on the US Olympic team was sponsored by Dr. Pepper, Verizon, and (I think) Miller Lite, and of course he and the Colbert Nation sponsored the US Olympic speed skating team, with the logo prominently displayed on the skaters heads and thighs. During the Olympics, several family members of the speed skaters were wearing Colbert Nation hats.
** [[Running Gag|"I have an iPad! :D"]]
** He's also used product placement as an excuse to drink real beer (well, Bud Light Lime). On television. Twice. In the same week.
** There was also the night that [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/311926/june-07-2010/charity-begins-at-11-30 Bing promised to donate $2,500 to relief for the gulf oil spill] every time he said "bing
**
** In 2012, Stephen mocked sponsor Wheat Thins by reading quotes from the hilariously specific memo they had provided him to promote the product. It included such detailed instructions as "[Stephen] shall not be shown eating more than 16." He jams 16 in his mouth, when when he goes to add the 17th, the show suddenly has "technical difficulties." When he returns, a lawyer is on set and Stephen is mock-apologizing to Nabisco.
* [[Pungeon Master]]:
{{quote|'''Colbert''': (''on same-sex marriage law passing in New York state'') Folks, I am not happy, or 'gay
== Q - T ==
* [[Quote Mine]]:
* [[Ratings Stunt]]: At least one time this was Parodied and connected to the [[Sweeps]][http://thecolbertreport.cc.com/videos/9dr12d/survival-tips-from--good-morning-america-]▼
* [[Rapid-Fire Typing]]: Any time he types anything, on anything. Typewriters, computers, phones, 10 keys, everything! Including smacking the keys with the back of his hand.
▲* [[Ratings Stunt]]: At least one time this was Parodied and connected to the [[Sweeps]][http://thecolbertreport.cc.com/videos/9dr12d/survival-tips-from--good-morning-america-].
* [[Real Joke Name]]: The crawl on the bottom of the screen showing donors to Colbert's Super PAC included a "Suq Madiq", who apparently has a father named Liqa Madiq and a mother named Munchma Quchi. Colbert proceeded to [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/393971/august-04-2011/colbert-super-pac---the-heroes-respond break character and laugh uncontrollably.] He referred to them again in the April 4, 2012 episode, thanking Suq Madiq along with Harry Balsac and Apoop Mapanz.▼
* [[Raygun Gothic]]: Tek Jansen is an [[Affectionate Parody]] of the genre.
▲* [[Real Joke Name]]: The crawl on the bottom of the screen showing donors to Colbert's
* [[A Riddle Wrapped in a Mystery Inside An Enigma]]: When Stephen uncovered [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/166955/april-23-2008/the-lost-o-reilly-tapes-pt--1 "lost footage"] from an interview with [[Bill O Reilly|Bill O'Reilly]], Stephen introduced it as "a conundrum wrapped in a riddle covered with a spicy enigma sauce."
* [[Robot War]]: Most times robots are mentioned Stephen warns about how they will turn against us and start a [[Robot War]].
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* [[Rule of Three]]: [[Insane Troll Logic|"That's three. Three times makes it true."]]
* [[Running Gag]]: Lots.
* [[Sadistic Choice]]: He had an [[Actual Pacifist]] play Marry/Dump/Bomb with Iran, Pakistan, or North Korea. {{spoiler|He bombed North Korea
* [[Saying Too Much]]: Most infamously, in response to Bill O'Reilly's claim that Colbert "blew me right away".
* [[Say My Name]]:
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** '''"GORE!"'''
** '''"[[Jimmy Fallon|FALLON!!]]"'''
* [[Scandalgate]]: Stephen referred to Michelle Obama shaking the hand of Indonesia's Health Minister as "Handergate
* [[Scare Chord]]: Used along with a sudden camera change while Stephen tells the nation something allegedly horrifying in order to promote his March to Keep Fear Alive.
** Also, in the January 4, 2010 episode (first after the new year), he says, "[[It Makes Sense in Context|I just hope the butt fat I had injected into my cheeks]] wasn't from the butt-" (scare chord) "...of a murderer."
* [[See You in Hell]]: Parodied at the end of each "Cheating Death" health segment: "This is Stephen Colbert, and I'll see you in ''health''!"
* [[Self-Deprecation]]: About his rivalry with [[Arch Enemy|Rain]] - "Beating me in a dance-off on the technicality that he's a '''much''' better dancer than I am!"
* [[Serious Business]]: The idea of schools banning tater tots turns into a massive rant spurred by
** The rivalry between [[Jimmy Fallon]] over their Ben & Jerry's ice cream flavor popularities, Colbert's "Americone Dream" and Fallon's "Late Night Snack". Apparently, potato chips in your ice cream is taboo.
** When sugar becomes scarce,
* [[Sesame Street Cred]]: Inverted, when Cookie Monster appeared in ''his'' show.
* [[Sex Bot]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/261497/january-12-2010/roxxxy-the-sex-robot On reporting about the world's first Sex Bot.] And it wasn't the Japanese, it's us! Ain't that a kick in the head?
{{quote|"And they say America doesn't make anything anymore!"}}
* [[Shaggy Dog Story]]: Stephen's [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/343140/august-05-2010/how-to-ruin-same-sex-marriages recent segment] detailing his love affair with a [[Jon Stewart|Jewish man named Jonathan]].
* [[Shout-Out]]: Among the people who've donated to Colbert's SuperPAC are [[The Lord of the Rings|Lord Sauron]], [[Atlas Shrugged|John Galt]], [[Strangers with Candy|Jerri Blank]], [[Inglip|R Inglip]], D.B. Cooper, and [[Jesus]] of
* [[Significant Birth Date]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/61793/april-18-2006/stephen-jr--hatches- The eagle named after Stephen was born on Patriots' Day.] Stephen hopes that this will be a significant birthday and that Stephen
* [[Small Name, Big Ego]]: Parodied as part of the show's main premise.
* [[Spell My Name with an "S"|Spell My Name With A PH]]: The segment about "Stephens With A PH". The first subject was [[Stephen King]]; [[Stephen Fry]] will also be featured (eventually).
* [[Spit Take]]: Lampshaded, predicted, deliberately engineered (twice in a row!) yet still hilarious.
* [[Stalker with a Crush]]: Colbert stalks his ex-girlfriend Charlene, despite her restraining order against him. So he formed a prog-rock band "Stephen and the Colberts" and wrote a song about it. [[Defictionalization|It later became a song in]] [[Rock Band]].
** Apparently he is ''so'' [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1c9eocuEsVo over Charlene now]... by the way, who is Alan?
* [[Start My Own]]: As a [[Take That]] to losing [[Time Magazine]] No. 1 Most Influential Person of 2007 to [[Arch Enemy|Rain]], Colbert made a music video parodying "How To Avoid The Sun", where he not only danced but also [[Shown Their Work|sang in Korean]].
** Then after watching ''[[Speed Racer]]'' and
* [[Stealth Parody]]: Believed by some to be a parody of the left-wing lens. If so, it's a rather brilliant one, as many reading this very opinion take it to mean he's thought to be sincere.
* [[Stealth Pun]]: Stephen's attorney Gorlock is {{spoiler|a legal alien}}.
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{{quote|'''Stephen''': Like being gay, being British is a choice.
'''Hicklin''': It's a fallacy that gay is a choice-
'''Stephen''': This is a family show, I'd rather you not use the word 'fallacy'.
* [[Stock Footage]]: There is a short clip of a roaring bear that is shown pretty much every time Stephen mentions bears, especially during the Threatdown
** A clip of Michael Stipe sitting on
* [[Stop Helping Me!]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/313508/june-24-2010/put-the-cursed-monkey-paw-down Whoever has the cursed monkey paw, stop making wishes!]
* [[The Straight Man]]: Jay the Intern. [[The Chew Toy|Poor guy.]]
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* [[Studio Audience]]: Obviously.
* [[Stunned Silence]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/391989/july-14-2011/murdoch-s-media-empire-might-go-down-the-toilet Stephen's response] when he learns that among the victims of "News of the World" hacking scandal were the voicemails of victims of 9/11, families of British soldiers killed in the war in Afghanistan and the voicemail of a missing 13 year old girl. "News of the World" even took the liberty of deleting some of the girl's messages when her voicemail started to fill up leading to her family being given false hope that she might still be alive.
* [[Stupid Statement Dance Mix]]: According to some liberal pundit, Mitt Romney's stay-at-home wife has [[Real Women Never Wear Dresses|"never worked a day in her life
* [[Suddenly Sexuality]]:
{{quote|'''[http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/414120/may-10-2012/barack-obama-s-gay-blasphemy Stephen]''': I am still reeling from Pres. Obama's announcement yesterday that he is gay. (''crowd laughs'') Now I have to assume that's the reason he supports gay marriage.
* [[Sunk Cost Fallacy]]: When discussing torture, Stephen summed this fallacy up nicely: "[http://www.dailykos.com/story/2011/05/18/977051/-Brilliant-Stephen-Colbert-piece-on-renewed-torture-debate We must do whatever it takes to justify what we've already done.]"
* [[Suspiciously Similar Substitute]]: The "Ham Rove" [[Running Gag]];
** The French-Canadian and lethally foul-mouthed Stephan Colbert.▼
* [[Suspiciously Specific Denial]]:
** Stephen's team of not-8-year-old-Malaysian-child-labours took a few days to sort through suggestions for Stephen's SuperPAC.
** The Definitely-Not-Coordinated-With-Stephen-Colbert-SuperPAC.
* [[The Tag]]: "Oh, hi! I didn't see you there."▼
* [[Take That]]: This man makes his ''entire career'' out of these.
▲* [[Suspiciously Similar Substitute]]: The "Ham Rove" [[Running Gag]]; Steven can't get Karl Rove on the show, so he finds a stand-in- a rack of deli ham wearing glasses.
▲** The French-Canadian and lethally foul-mouthed Stephan Colbert.
* [[Temporal Paradox]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/253948/october-28-2009/sign-off---future-stephen When Stephen wanted to lure his] [[My Future Self and Me|future self]] into the present to talk with him, he threatened to stick a fork into a toaster unless his future self came back to stop him. His future self did come back, but present Stephen went through with sticking the fork into the toaster anyway, thus killing him. When future Stephen saw that 2009 Stephen was dead, he decided to take 2009 Stephen's place so that he could still exist 500 years from now to continue hosting his show. Makes sense, doesn't it?
* [[Tempting Fate]]:
** Colbert claims that it'll take more than a 4 star general to get him to shave his hair off. [[Barack Obama|Guess who appears to give an executive order for General Rey Odierno to shave Colbert's head]].
** Colbert asks to see some of [[Arch Enemy|Rain]]'s supposed "[[Ninja]] [[Badass|badassedness]]." Cut to a video clip of [[Ninja Assassin|Rain displaying awesome ninja badassedness]].
* [[Torches and Pitchforks]]: Stephen keeps a pitchfork in the [[Hammerspace]] under his desk and since he already refers to the [[Studio Audience]] as "[[Fan Community Nicknames|the mob]]", [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/221836/march-16-2009/stephen-s-angry-mob-will-crush-aig it was only a matter of time
▲* [[The Tag]]: "Oh, hi! I didn't see you there."
▲* [[Torches and Pitchforks]]: Stephen keeps a pitchfork in the [[Hammerspace]] under his desk and since he already refers to the [[Studio Audience]] as "[[Fan Community Nicknames|the mob]]", [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/221836/march-16-2009/stephen-s-angry-mob-will-crush-aig it was only a matter of time].
* [[Translation Train Wreck]]: Parodied when Colbert showed Google Translate's take on a Korean article about his rivalry with [[Arch Enemy|Rain]].
* [[Transparent Closet]]: It's <s>heavily implied</s> ''outright stated'' that Stephen (in-character) has repressed homosexual tendencies.▼
** [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/111138/october-10-2007/tip-wag---bruce-springsteen Baby carrots are trying to make him gay.]▼
** Colbert's test for determining if one of his male employees is gay is showing him a picture of a [[Walking Shirtless Scene|shirtless Matthew McConaughey]] and asking if they find it sexy. If they answer no, Colbert says they are gay and in denial because a straight man would acknowledge how sexy he is.▼
* [[Trash Talk]]: Stephen loves to trash talk and he is good at it.
** [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/166777/april-22-2008/earth-is-awesome In honor of Earth Day, Stephen participates in a little interplanetary trash talk.]
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** [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/250626/october-01-2009/2016-olympics-in-chicago---george-wendt Stephen and George Wendt trash talk Rio de Janeiro, Madrid and Tokyo for competing against Chicago's 2016 Olympics bid.]
** [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/79158/december-05-2006/sport-report---coach-mancini Stephen trash talks an opponent of the Saginaw Spirit.]
** The "Cantons Controversy
** Also [[Arch Enemy|Rain]] has received his fair share of this:
{{quote|"Come on, what's wrong Rain? Tell me when Korea lists the non-existent embargo on BALLS!"
"Hey Rain, nice jacket! My sister wants it back."
▲* [[Transparent Closet]]: It's <s>heavily implied</s> ''outright stated'' that Stephen (in-character) has repressed homosexual tendencies.
▲** [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/111138/october-10-2007/tip-wag---bruce-springsteen Baby carrots are trying to make him gay.]
▲** Colbert's test for determining if one of his male employees is gay is showing him a picture of a [[Walking Shirtless Scene|shirtless Matthew McConaughey]] and asking if they find it sexy. If they answer no Colbert says they are gay and in denial because a straight man would acknowledge how sexy he is.
* [[Troperiffic]]
* [[Tsundere]]: "Charlene II (I'm Over You)" is absolutely ''dripping'' with how Stephen is [[Blatant Lies|totally, completely]] over Charlene... not that he's 100% against the concept of a relationship with her. You know, hypothetically.
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== U - Z ==
* [[Ugly Guy, Hot Wife]]: Stephen expresses bewilderment at how Dennis Kucinich got married to his (taller, younger, [[Heroes Want Redheads|redheaded]]) wife.
* [[Unknown Rival]]:
{{quote|'''Colbert''': ''Ted Nugent has condemned your generation as lazing and apathetic. Your response?''
'''NYU Student''': ''Who's Ted Nugent?''
* [[Up to Eleven]]: Stephen Colbert vs. Sen. John Kyl's [https://web.archive.org/web/20121014221719/http://articles.cnn.com/2011-04-15/opinion/avlon.kyl.truth_1_abortions-stephen-colbert-facts?_s=PM:OPINION 'Not Intended To Be A Factual Statement'.]
* [[Vitriolic Best Buds]]: According to Stephen, [[Donald Trump]].
{{quote|'''Stephen''': Donald Trump is a friend. He's my best friend. Number 1, best, greatest friend of all time. We race yachts, we trade mistresses. I call him "[[Meal Ticket|Trump Card]]," he calls me "[[Mistaken for Servant|Col-beer]]." That said, the guy's a boob. He looks like [[Flowery Insults|a tangelo had sex with an old dishrag]]. And I can say that because I love this man.}}
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'''Steve''': Of course you are excited, Stephen. I'm not your normal guest, people have heard of me. Stephen, I am an international movie star.
'''Stephen''': Yes, Steve. I suppose Canada counts as international. And yes, most of my guests are people who contribute to society. So bantering with an old friend about mindless Tinseltown pablum is a welcome vacation from substance.
'''Steve''': Thanks, Stephen. Is a vacation for me too. I am used to having 8 million people watch me on TV. Doing the ''Report'' is like being in the Witness Relocation Program.
** And of course with [[Arch Enemy|Rain]] (via recorded messages):
{{quote|'''Rain''': Let's just say, don't quit your day job.
'''Stephen''': My day job happens to be president of the "I Hate Rain Fanclub"!
* [["Well Done, Son" Guy]]: It seems that Stephen has some very deep approval-from-a-father-figure issues.▼
* [[We Named the Monkey "Jack"]]: The stuffed moose seen in the Vancouver shows was named "Ebersol"; when he went over to NBC Late-Night, he was renamed "Colbert", and now that he's going on exhibit at NBC, he'll get another name because [[Comedy Central]] and NBC are rival companies.
* [[What Do You Mean It's Not Awesome?]]: During an interview with HCAN leader Richard Kirsch, Colbert asks if alligators versus chickens would be awesome.
** [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/350667/august-19-2010/the-word---what-if-you-threw-a-peace-and-nobody-came- Just] ''listen'' to what he thinks [[Barack Obama]] should do after declaring the end of the war.
** Also, just [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/377119/march-10-2011/colbert-pac-ad listen to that explosive handshake!]
* [[What Do You Mean It's Not Heinous?]]: The idea behind the ''Nailed'Em'' segments is that Stephen viciously attacks someone who has got in trouble for doing something completely innocent.
* [[Wiki Vandal]]/[[Retconning the Wiki]]: Wikiality.▼
▲* [[What Have I Done]]: Colbert about a "fake" gay relationship entered solely in order to turn a man off the idea of gay marriage forever.
* [[With Us or Against Us]]: Stephen is like this about ''everything''. {{
▲* [["Well Done, Son" Guy]]: It seems that Stephen has some very deep approval-from-a-father-figure issues.
▲* [[Wiki Vandal]]: Wikiality.
▲* [[With Us or Against Us]]: Stephen is like this about ''everything''. {{smallcaps|[[False Dichotomy|Divides Supermarket Into 'Cheese' and 'Not Cheese'.]]}}
{{quote|"''War '''And''' Peace''? [[Catch Phrase|Pick a side, we're at war]]".}}
* [[Word, Schmord]]: "Evolution, Schmevolution" Week.
** The genuine Colbert also admitted in interviews to gaining a lot of respect for [[Arch Enemy|Rain]] after the dance-off, saying that he knew he was "in the presence of a master". ▼
* [[Worst News Judgment Ever]]: The show did a segment covering how a man in Athens, GA saying it was "too hot to fish" became a story in that town's newspaper, and somehow became a story in ''The New York Times''.
* [[
▲** The genuine Colbert also admitted in interviews to gaining a lot of respect for [[Arch Enemy|Rain]] after the dance-off, saying that he knew he was "in the presence of a master
* [[Yes but What Does Zataproximetacine DO]]: Parodied in the "Cheating Death" segments (which open with a [[Chess with Death]] sequence where Stephen distracts Death and moves the pieces), where Colbert advertises sponsor Prescott Pharmaceutical's cure-all drug whose name is usually a variant on "Vaxadrine." Side effects include "minor heart explosions", "speaking in tongues", "braintooth", "tracheal meerkat colonies", "carcassing", "ADHDEAD", "[[Shout-Out|Mind of Mencia]]", and "involuntary [[Narnia]] adventures". Also growth of teeth. <ref>Often in your mouth!</ref>▼
▲* [[Yes but What Does Zataproximetacine DO]]: Parodied in the "Cheating Death" segments (which open with a [[Chess with Death]] sequence where Stephen distracts Death and moves the pieces), where Colbert advertises sponsor Prescott Pharmaceutical's cure-all drug whose name is usually a variant on "Vaxadrine
* [[You Can Panic Now]]: If there's fear to be mongered, Stephen's the one to do it. It's pretty much the point of Threat Down. Kinda [[Deconstructed]] at one point, where a failed terrorist attempt caused most of the media to call the bomb pathetic. Colbert then reminds everyone that they ARE scared out of their gourds "so the terrorist has succeeded and therefore doesn't have to prove his point by trying another attack".▼
** When going through a (mock) vetting by Clinton vetter Cliff Sloan in an attempt to get a position on [[Barack Obama]]'s cabinet, [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/210799/november-19-2008/stephen-s-vetting-process---cliff-sloan-pt--2 Stephen is taken to task for these endorsements.]
* [[You Fail Logic Forever]]: Colbert's own special brand of tortured logic permeates just about every explanation or piece of reasoning on the show. The lead-up to the epic [[Melee a Trois]] ran on a deeply bizarre use of "the transitive property of Huckabee". Not to mention his method of deducing everything from the truth about the Illuminati to the results of the 2008 presidential election, which consists of him free-associating words at random.▼
▲* [[You Can Panic Now]]: If there's fear to be mongered, Stephen's the one to do it. It's pretty much the point of Threat Down. Kinda [[Deconstructed]] at one point, where a failed terrorist attempt caused most of the media to call the bomb pathetic. Colbert then reminds everyone that they ARE scared out of their gourds "so the terrorist has succeeded and therefore doesn't have to prove his point by trying another attack
* [[You Can't Make an Omelette]]: You can't make a safety
▲* [[You Fail Logic Forever]]: Colbert's own special brand of tortured logic permeates just about every explanation or piece of reasoning on the show. The lead-up to the epic [[Melee a Trois]] ran on a deeply bizarre use of "the transitive property of Huckabee
* [[Your Makeup Is Running]]: [http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/216580/january-20-2009/stephen-s-inauguration-breakdown The inauguration of Barack Obama caused Stephen to cry with massive amounts of mascara running and snot hanging from his nose.]
▲* [[You Can't Make an Omelette]]: You can't make a safety omelette without breaking a few brown eggs [http://thecolbertreport.cc.com/video-playlists/g5u22r/colbert-report-09139].
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